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<p><a target="_blank" href="https://www.buzzsprout.com/twilio/text_messages/2294789/open_sms">Send us a text</a></p><p>Autistic couples arguing? Raffi Bilek (marriage coach, <em>The Couples Communication Handbook</em> author) shares game-changers: Talk/listen turns (no simultaneous fights), reflect back to track feelings, I-statements for impact (not blame—&quot;I feel hurt when...&quot;), and split convos (explore problem first, solve later)—to avoid fight-or-flight spirals. For autistic/ND partners decoding body language/flat affect, allies learning patience, or anyone building bonds without insults, this convo&apos;s your toolkit—repair over perfection (&quot;Relationships thrive on repair, not zero conflict&quot;).</p><p>Timestamps:<br/> 0:00 - Intro: Raffi&apos;s Mission for Awesome Marriages<br/> 0:15 - Why Communication Matters in Disagreements<br/> 1:32 - Game-Changer: Talk/Listen &amp; Reflect<br/> 2:50 - Listening Without Planning Rebuttal<br/> 4:09 - Humor/Laughter in Arguments (or Not?)<br/> 5:36 - Schedule Pauses to Avoid Escalation<br/> 7:02 - Right vs. Wrong Ways to Argue<br/> 8:27 - Active Listening: Chunk &amp; Reflect<br/> 9:57 - Unresolved Issues Keep Coming Up<br/> 11:19 - Body Language Challenges for Autistics<br/> 12:10 - Insults: Speak About Yourself, Not Them<br/> 13:25 - When to Seek Counseling (Before Big Problems)<br/> 14:48 - Book <em>Couples Communication Handbook</em><br/> 16:39 - Individual Therapy Alongside Couples Work<br/> 18:15 - Dating: Disclose Autism Early<br/> 19:44 - Argument Styles &amp; Basics to Fix<br/> 21:26 - Self-Soothing Before Heated Moments<br/> 23:21 - Walking Away: Break vs. Brush-Off<br/> 24:48 - Teach Kids to Argue? (Interpersonal Ed)<br/> 27:17 - Book Details &amp; Bigger Audience Reach<br/> 28:37 - Red Flags: When Counseling Won&apos;t Fix<br/> 30:23 - Where to Find Raffi (Site/Book/Coaching)</p><p>Subscribe on Apple/Spotify for weekly neurodivergent adulting tools—rate/review if tips bridged a gap! Resources/book in notes. Squad, share w/ a communicator (tag &apos;em below—let&apos;s connect!). Merch: &apos;Dynamite&apos; tees for convo days (Linktree in notes). #AutisticCouplesCommunication #NeurodivergentRepair #AdultingWithAutism #BTSNeurodivergent #PodMatch</p><p><br/></p><p>Struggling with autistic couples communication? Raffi Bilek unpacks frameworks: Over 10 years coaching, his <em>Couples Communication Handbook</em> teaches talk/listen turns (one speaks, other reflects—no overlap), I-statements (&quot;I feel...&quot; vs. accusations), and dual convos (understand problem before solving)—for ND mismatches like flat affect/body language gaps. Repair essentials: Pause for calm (schedule returns, no dish-throwing emergencies), self-soothe (breathing/exercise before fight-or-flight), and active listening (chunk/reflect to confirm understanding). For autistic young adults dating/decoding signals, partners practicing validation, or allies fostering bonds, Raffi&apos;s &quot;defense isn&apos;t helpful—impact motivates change&quot; flips blame to connection. Why counsel early? Cheaper than divorce; individual therapy for personal issues (e.g., trauma/OCD) alongside couples work. From <em&a