Big Shiny Tones tears into the week with a trifecta of guitar-nerd mayhem: the shimmering swagger of the Johnny Marr Signature Jaguar, built for jangly arpeggios and clean lines sharp enough to shave with; the unhinged sonic chaos of Jack White’s Troika pedal, a three-headed fuzz monster that sounds like it was wired together in a thunderstorm; and John Mayer, calmly dropping bombs from the tone-guru throne, declaring that radius doesn’t matter while the internet collectively flips its lid.

It’s guitars, it’s opinions, it’s glorious noise — Big Shiny Tones style.