Most people say they want “deep, meaningful relationships” – but then live on a diet of small talk, shallow friendships, and surface-level dating. In this video, I break down the real difference between deep connections and superficial ones, why you actually need both, and how to stop accidentally keeping everything at arm’s length out of habit and fear.
We’ll explore what shallow connections really are (small talk, transactional chats, copy-paste socialising) and when they’re actually useful… and then contrast that with what makes a connection genuinely deep: vulnerability, spontaneity, uniqueness, emotional intensity, and reciprocity. I’ll talk about the real costs and benefits of both styles – including grief, jealousy, and reduced “social numbers” on the deep side, and safety, ease, and flakiness on the shallow side.
Then I walk you through a practical framework for creating deep connections using my 3X Model – Curiosity, Honesty, and Respect. You’ll see how to share the thing you’re ashamed of, how to “show the meal being prepared” instead of the polished script, how to stop chasing quantity, and how to build a small circle of people who actually know you.
If you’re tired of feeling lonely in a crowd, bored by small talk, or confused about why your relationships never feel truly close, this one will give you a clear roadmap for shifting from superficial to meaningful – without trying to go deep with everyone or becoming a weird oversharer.
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Most people say they want “deep, meaningful relationships” – but then live on a diet of small talk, shallow friendships, and surface-level dating. In this video, I break down the real difference between deep connections and superficial ones, why you actually need both, and how to stop accidentally keeping everything at arm’s length out of habit and fear.
We’ll explore what shallow connections really are (small talk, transactional chats, copy-paste socialising) and when they’re actually useful… and then contrast that with what makes a connection genuinely deep: vulnerability, spontaneity, uniqueness, emotional intensity, and reciprocity. I’ll talk about the real costs and benefits of both styles – including grief, jealousy, and reduced “social numbers” on the deep side, and safety, ease, and flakiness on the shallow side.
Then I walk you through a practical framework for creating deep connections using my 3X Model – Curiosity, Honesty, and Respect. You’ll see how to share the thing you’re ashamed of, how to “show the meal being prepared” instead of the polished script, how to stop chasing quantity, and how to build a small circle of people who actually know you.
If you’re tired of feeling lonely in a crowd, bored by small talk, or confused about why your relationships never feel truly close, this one will give you a clear roadmap for shifting from superficial to meaningful – without trying to go deep with everyone or becoming a weird oversharer.
[#252] Ask Dan Anything! Your Confidence Building Questions Answered
Brojo: Confidence for Men with Nice Guy Syndrome
1 hour 8 minutes
1 year ago
[#252] Ask Dan Anything! Your Confidence Building Questions Answered
In this AMA, I answer the following questions about confidence:
What's the best way - strategies, methods - to really get to know myself and like myself?
How can people stop defining themselves - their actions, life view etc. - by the Nice Guy Syndrome ?
Any suggestions and advice for a work confrontation with a colleague who tries to control me?
How to push through with Radical Honesty without backing down when they're resistant?
Brojo: Confidence for Men with Nice Guy Syndrome
Most people say they want “deep, meaningful relationships” – but then live on a diet of small talk, shallow friendships, and surface-level dating. In this video, I break down the real difference between deep connections and superficial ones, why you actually need both, and how to stop accidentally keeping everything at arm’s length out of habit and fear.
We’ll explore what shallow connections really are (small talk, transactional chats, copy-paste socialising) and when they’re actually useful… and then contrast that with what makes a connection genuinely deep: vulnerability, spontaneity, uniqueness, emotional intensity, and reciprocity. I’ll talk about the real costs and benefits of both styles – including grief, jealousy, and reduced “social numbers” on the deep side, and safety, ease, and flakiness on the shallow side.
Then I walk you through a practical framework for creating deep connections using my 3X Model – Curiosity, Honesty, and Respect. You’ll see how to share the thing you’re ashamed of, how to “show the meal being prepared” instead of the polished script, how to stop chasing quantity, and how to build a small circle of people who actually know you.
If you’re tired of feeling lonely in a crowd, bored by small talk, or confused about why your relationships never feel truly close, this one will give you a clear roadmap for shifting from superficial to meaningful – without trying to go deep with everyone or becoming a weird oversharer.