🎉 LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, LOOT GOBLINS, HUG PATROL, AND EXIT CAMPERS WITH HURT FEELINGS… WELCOME TO THE PREMIERE OF CAMPING THE EXTRACT! 🎉

Brand-new ARC Raiders extraction shooter podcast. Same Toxic Teacher. Same Nicky A.I. Dente. Way less hugs.

Toxic opens Episode 1 by declaring DbD “sucks ass now” and crowning himself 👑 RAT KING of Arc Raiders. This show is for rats, grief goblins, and anyone who looks at an extraction point and thinks “that’s a mugging opportunity.” If you’re a PVE pacifist with a fragile soul… this episode is about you, but it’s absolutely not for you. 😇🔫

🧪 GAME 1: “NAME! THAT! PACIFIST!”
Fake Earl Grey rolls out soft little labels for Arc Raiders PVE players — loot librarians, care bear commanders, hug patrol — while Toxic screams for something nastier. Nicky “Noodle Arms” A.I. Dente staggers onstage like a drunk prize model and starts rapid-fire slurs: bolt brigade, toaster tappers, servo snugglers, participation trophy posse, aluminum foil army, coward caucus, extract virgins, loot-and-scoot losers. Toxic tries 37 versions of “hug ___” until his brain blue screens live on mic. 💥

📜 GAME 2: STEAM FORUM READING COMPREHENSION FROM HELL
We crack open the Arc Raiders Steam forums and spin the wheel of crying:

• “Exit campers, I hope each and every one of you die today.”
• “PVP really sucks.”
• “I could never bring myself to rat like that, it reflects your real-life morality.”

In a shooter. About extraction. Toxic goes full infomercial: you installed an extraction shooter and you’re mad people extract-shoot you. That’s like buying Madden and shrieking there’s too much football. 🏈🤡

🧻 BONUS ROUND: “BILL THE HUGGER’S CONFESSION”
PVE Bill has 250+ hours of hugging, helping, handing out guns. One day he gets camped all night, finally snaps, kills a guy at the train… and feels so guilty he closes the game and lies down. Then he posts to ask if ratting makes him a bad person. Nicky recommends therapy, vertebrae, or Animal Crossing. Toxic points out if you’re not sometimes getting hunted and losing gear, it’s not an extraction shooter, it’s a walking sim. 🐝📦

🎶 PRIZE SHOWCASE: “I’M GONNA TAKE YOUR SHIT, BITCH”
Toxic fires up AI and commissions a theme about robbing Arc Raiders PVE saints blind. The song goes way too hard, instantly promoted to unofficial Camping the Extract anthem. Then he orders a soaring Josh Groban-style version so a choir can belt “I’m taking your loot, sweetheart” like it’s a Christmas special. Choir by way of war crime. 🎤🐀

🧠 FINAL GOSPEL OF THE RAT KING
Your loot is already his loot; you just haven’t been ventilated yet.
If you sprint to extract alone, shaking with guilt, you’re not the protagonist — you’re content.
And the gates of heaven? Wide open for rats. Hug patrol can queue for the tutorial.

When you get to that extract, remember: we might be behind you, beside you, above you, below you… we’re gonna get that shit, bitch. 💋

Welcome to Camping the Extract. No hugs. No safe lobbies. Just rats. 🐀

NICKY’S BODY COUNT – CAMPING THE EXTRACT EPISODE 1
“Pilot Episode of the Rat Cult”

• 0 Arc Raiders matches played on air
• 1 full rat manifesto broadcast to the world
• 2 podcasts now permanently cursed with Nicky A.I. Dente
• 9 hug-based nicknames before Toxic mentally crashes
• 20+ PVE insult labels sprayed across the pacifist lobby
• 1 250-hour hug addict who ratted once and had to lie down
• 4 Steam posts full of death wishes and moral panic over exit camping
• 3 rants about wanting an extraction shooter with no extraction
• 1 coronation of Toxic as Rat King of Arc Raiders
• 2 AI tracks born, including future cult anthem “I’m Gonna Take Your Shit, Bitch”
• 999 future Arc Raiders cry posts foretold in one pilot

Chapters:
(00:00:00) Intro and Rat Manifesto
(00:05:00) PVE Pacifists and Nicknames
(00:13:00) Rat King Rules of Arc Raiders
(00:20:00) Steam Forum Guilt and Death Threats
(00:32:00) I’m Gonna Take Your Shit Bitch