Click here to learn more: https://integrallife.com/attunement
Keith Martin-Smith and David Arrell diagnose the core pathology of contemporary life: we're living in an attainment culture that measures worth through accumulation—more status, more recognition, more stuff—while starving the qualities that actually make life worth living. The result? Epidemic levels of anxiety, polarization, narcissism, and a quiet desperation that no amount of productivity hacks or self-optimization can touch.
The alternative isn't another framework to add to your collection. It's a fundamental reorientation toward attunement culture—a shift from quantity to quality, from getting to becoming, from conquest to meaning.
David lays out the architecture of this shift across three temporal dimensions:
HEALTH (The Past): Most of us are operating from developmental anchors—unconscious wounds and reactive patterns that keep us stuck at earlier stages of maturity. When you criticize, control, or comply automatically, you're not responding to what's in front of you; you're responding from an old script. The work is to turn toward these patterns with curiosity, reclaim the energy locked there, and stop letting the past hijack your present.
DEPTH (The Present): Your attention is under siege. Billions of dollars have been spent engineering super-normal stimuli to keep you distracted, metabolically aroused, and scrolling. But presence—the capacity to remain grounded when life gets turbulent—is the foundation of wisdom. Character and virtue aren't abstractions; they're your ability to tolerate weather without capsizing. The fruits of the spirit (love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control) emerge spontaneously when you create the conditions, like apples from a healthy tree.
GROWTH (The Future): Beyond your current capacities are your leading edges—the places where you're stretching into new territory. Growth means tolerating the unknown, throwing aspirational grappling hooks into territory you can't yet see clearly, and expanding your container of authenticity. It's not about becoming someone else; it's about becoming more fully who you already are.
Throughout the conversation, Keith and David return to a revolutionary foundation: dignity culture. Unlike respect (which must be earned), dignity simply is—every human being has equal claim to worth by virtue of being human. This creates common ground from which we can build toward higher ground. It dissolves the false choice between dominator hierarchies and victim narratives, between attainment Olympics and oppression Olympics.
---
Ideas don't transform lives — lived practice does. You can understand everything David and Keith discussed intellectually and still show up tomorrow exactly as you did today: distracted, reactive, caught in the same patterns, serving the same attainment culture that's been grinding you down.
Click here to learn more: https://integrallife.com/attunement
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Click here to learn more: https://integrallife.com/attunement
Keith Martin-Smith and David Arrell diagnose the core pathology of contemporary life: we're living in an attainment culture that measures worth through accumulation—more status, more recognition, more stuff—while starving the qualities that actually make life worth living. The result? Epidemic levels of anxiety, polarization, narcissism, and a quiet desperation that no amount of productivity hacks or self-optimization can touch.
The alternative isn't another framework to add to your collection. It's a fundamental reorientation toward attunement culture—a shift from quantity to quality, from getting to becoming, from conquest to meaning.
David lays out the architecture of this shift across three temporal dimensions:
HEALTH (The Past): Most of us are operating from developmental anchors—unconscious wounds and reactive patterns that keep us stuck at earlier stages of maturity. When you criticize, control, or comply automatically, you're not responding to what's in front of you; you're responding from an old script. The work is to turn toward these patterns with curiosity, reclaim the energy locked there, and stop letting the past hijack your present.
DEPTH (The Present): Your attention is under siege. Billions of dollars have been spent engineering super-normal stimuli to keep you distracted, metabolically aroused, and scrolling. But presence—the capacity to remain grounded when life gets turbulent—is the foundation of wisdom. Character and virtue aren't abstractions; they're your ability to tolerate weather without capsizing. The fruits of the spirit (love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control) emerge spontaneously when you create the conditions, like apples from a healthy tree.
GROWTH (The Future): Beyond your current capacities are your leading edges—the places where you're stretching into new territory. Growth means tolerating the unknown, throwing aspirational grappling hooks into territory you can't yet see clearly, and expanding your container of authenticity. It's not about becoming someone else; it's about becoming more fully who you already are.
Throughout the conversation, Keith and David return to a revolutionary foundation: dignity culture. Unlike respect (which must be earned), dignity simply is—every human being has equal claim to worth by virtue of being human. This creates common ground from which we can build toward higher ground. It dissolves the false choice between dominator hierarchies and victim narratives, between attainment Olympics and oppression Olympics.
---
Ideas don't transform lives — lived practice does. You can understand everything David and Keith discussed intellectually and still show up tomorrow exactly as you did today: distracted, reactive, caught in the same patterns, serving the same attainment culture that's been grinding you down.
Click here to learn more: https://integrallife.com/attunement
In today's deeply divided world—marked by polarized politics, global tensions, and fractured communities—is the aspiration for "wholeness" realistic or even desirable? In this thought-provoking episode of Integral Edge, Keith Martin-Smith sits down with executive coach and consciousness explorer David Arrell to explore what it truly means to become whole, both personally and collectively, amid ongoing division and conflict.
The conversation begins by acknowledging an uncomfortable truth: human beings have always "othered" one another, creating deep divisions over seemingly trivial differences—illustrated vividly through the satirical example of Jonathan Swift’s kingdoms warring over how to crack an egg. Yet, as Keith and David unravel this tendency, they uncover a profound evolutionary logic behind our innate impulse to distrust and exclude "others" outside our tribe. From early hunter-gatherer societies protecting themselves from existential threats to vast empires maintaining cohesion through myths and collective identities, "othering" is a deeply ingrained survival strategy.
But does this mean we're doomed to division forever? David introduces the concept of "fictive kinship," where humans form collective bonds through shared stories, myths, and identities, enabling large-scale cooperation across cultures and history. However, as our conversation shifts into a developmental perspective, the limitations and dangers of this instinctual "othering" become clear, especially when we regress into lower stages of consciousness during times of intense polarization.
Drawing upon Integral Theory and the developmental frameworks of Robert Kegan and Terri O’Fallon, Keith and David discuss how the same moral teachings—like the Golden Rule—can be interpreted very differently depending on one's developmental stage. At a rule-based, "Amber" stage, the injunction to "do unto others as you would have them do unto you" often devolves into revenge-driven cycles. Yet at a more rational, individualistic "Orange" stage, it fosters genuine reciprocity and empathy. The crucial insight here is understanding how easily individuals at higher stages can regress, or "shadow crash," into these simpler and more combative perspectives when emotionally triggered—particularly visible in political polarization around figures like Donald Trump.
Join Keith Martin-Smith and David Arrell in this timely and deeply reflective conversation as they offer practical wisdom, inspiring perspectives, and genuine hope for navigating—and ultimately transcending—the divisions that mark our contemporary moment.
Everyone Is Right
Click here to learn more: https://integrallife.com/attunement
Keith Martin-Smith and David Arrell diagnose the core pathology of contemporary life: we're living in an attainment culture that measures worth through accumulation—more status, more recognition, more stuff—while starving the qualities that actually make life worth living. The result? Epidemic levels of anxiety, polarization, narcissism, and a quiet desperation that no amount of productivity hacks or self-optimization can touch.
The alternative isn't another framework to add to your collection. It's a fundamental reorientation toward attunement culture—a shift from quantity to quality, from getting to becoming, from conquest to meaning.
David lays out the architecture of this shift across three temporal dimensions:
HEALTH (The Past): Most of us are operating from developmental anchors—unconscious wounds and reactive patterns that keep us stuck at earlier stages of maturity. When you criticize, control, or comply automatically, you're not responding to what's in front of you; you're responding from an old script. The work is to turn toward these patterns with curiosity, reclaim the energy locked there, and stop letting the past hijack your present.
DEPTH (The Present): Your attention is under siege. Billions of dollars have been spent engineering super-normal stimuli to keep you distracted, metabolically aroused, and scrolling. But presence—the capacity to remain grounded when life gets turbulent—is the foundation of wisdom. Character and virtue aren't abstractions; they're your ability to tolerate weather without capsizing. The fruits of the spirit (love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control) emerge spontaneously when you create the conditions, like apples from a healthy tree.
GROWTH (The Future): Beyond your current capacities are your leading edges—the places where you're stretching into new territory. Growth means tolerating the unknown, throwing aspirational grappling hooks into territory you can't yet see clearly, and expanding your container of authenticity. It's not about becoming someone else; it's about becoming more fully who you already are.
Throughout the conversation, Keith and David return to a revolutionary foundation: dignity culture. Unlike respect (which must be earned), dignity simply is—every human being has equal claim to worth by virtue of being human. This creates common ground from which we can build toward higher ground. It dissolves the false choice between dominator hierarchies and victim narratives, between attainment Olympics and oppression Olympics.
---
Ideas don't transform lives — lived practice does. You can understand everything David and Keith discussed intellectually and still show up tomorrow exactly as you did today: distracted, reactive, caught in the same patterns, serving the same attainment culture that's been grinding you down.
Click here to learn more: https://integrallife.com/attunement
