"Now I get to be unscripted. Now I get to be authentic. Now I get to practice all these things that I really help other people with on a deeper layer."
Sometimes the universe orchestrates exactly what we need when we need it most. As I navigate the ongoing grief of my husband's dementia journey, my home decided to reveal its own hidden wounds - dry rot behind bedroom windows, black mold in his old office, and deteriorating siding that needed complete replacement.
What started as routine window repairs became a profound metaphor for my own reconstruction process. Just as the workers discovered years of hidden damage behind beautiful facades, I found myself facing three and a half days of guttural loneliness that had been buried for decades. "I have felt lonely even in a room full of people, feeling like I didn't fit in, feeling like I was different," I share with raw honesty.
Through this vulnerable exploration, I recognize how busyness became my lifelong distraction from these deep feelings. Years of people-pleasing, external validation seeking, and maintaining personas that kept me safe but hidden from my true self. The timing wasn't lost on me - as new windows were installed to change how I see the world and how the world sees me, I was simultaneously shedding old ways of being.
This episode is about choosing authenticity over performance, connection over hiding, and the courage to be unscripted in a world that often rewards facades. It's my invitation for you to examine what might be hidden behind your own beautiful exterior and to consider what reconstruction your soul might be calling for.
Resources:
Your FREE Forgive Yourself resources: https://brendareisscoaching.com/podcast-resource-optin/
Are you struggling with a situation or a person in your life? Wondering if you are ready to work on forgiving yourself? Take our quiz to find out your emotional IQ and how this impacts your ability to forgive: https://archetype.brendareisscoaching.com/sf/357cdc60
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