Imagine a world where animals had smartphones, Wi‑Fi passwords they somehow knew, and a burning desire to rate their experiences online. In this parallel universe, Yelp would no longer be dominated by humans complaining about slow service and cold fries. Instead, it would overflow with brutally honest, hilariously blunt, and surprisingly insightful reviews written by animals who have absolutely no patience for human nonsense. From cats judging your living room to pigeons critiquing public statues, animal Yelp reviews would expose the world in ways we were never prepared for.