David Brooks, How to Know a Person, The Art of Seeing Others Deeply and Being Deeply Seen These days, relationships, community, and social connection are all hot topics. We acknowledge that loneliness kills, and stress the importance of building friendships and creating community. But do we really know what we're talking about when we use these words? Do we know how to ask the questions that deepen a friendship? Can we set aside our own beliefs in order to hear and understand those of another person? And are we able to sit with someone who's suffering, even if it makes us uncomfortable? These skills are incredibly important in daily life, and yet they aren't taught in school. As a result, loneliness has become a common illness, and we find ourselves lacking the deep friendships we so crave. Fortunately, the ability to see others, and make them feel seen, is a skill you can cultivate. You can learn to treat people with consideration, to understand those around you, and care for your loved ones better.