In Episode 5 of Pain. Full. Truth., I open up about the hidden battles that come with living on long-term medication for Complex Regional Pain Syndrome (CRPS) and phantom limb pain.

I talk about the slow increase of Pregabalin over three years, the cocktail of drugs I take each day, and the side effects nobody warns you about — from brain fog to fatigue to hallucinations I rarely admit to.

But it’s not just the meds. This episode explores the silent impact of trying to show up for family trips and birthdays, while knowing I’ll pay the price for days afterwards. The guilt of watching my wife shoulder more, the pressure I put on myself to be “better by now,” and the way I hide the pain because I’m tired of saying the same words over and over.

I also talk about stepping away from streaming when it all got too much — and how online communities brought me back, reminding me I wasn’t completely alone.

This is an episode about the things we don’t say out loud, and the weight we carry in silence.

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