In this episode of The Evidence-Based Therapist, we sit down with local therapist and religious trauma specialist Darryl Schafer to explore how belief systems shape identity, belonging, and the development of the self—sometimes in deeply painful ways. We discuss the relational nature of religious trauma, how clients internalize theological narratives as self-concepts, and why reclaiming the “abjected” parts of self is often central to healing. The conversation spans psychoanalysis, religious studies, developmental theory, grief, and the biology of belief—without collapsing spirituality into pathology or assuming religion is inherently harmful. Topics we explore:When religion becomes a totalizing identity structureThe “abjected self” and why shame becomes internal theologyWhy religious trauma is relational—not just doctrinalNeurodivergence, masking, and leaving high-control systemsGrief as a gateway to identity reconstructionThe therapist’s role: not a replacement God, but a new mirrorHow belief systems shape belonging, moral vision, and connectionWhether you're a therapist working with clients of faith, someone navigating deconstruction, or simply curious about the psychology of belief, this conversation offers a grounded, relational, and non-pathologizing way to understand religion’s impact on the self. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.