Are you a Muslim woman who says yes when your soul screams no? Do you feel guilty every time you set a boundary? Do you think being a “good Muslim woman” means sacrificing everything?
Sister, it’s time to learn the Islamic art of saying no.
In this episode, we dive deep into boundaries from a Quranic and Prophetic perspective with real hadith, Sahaba examples, and practical scripts you can use this week when someone guilt-trips you.
What You’ll Learn:
The Salman al-Farsi Story
The powerful hadith where Salman told Abu Darda: “Your Lord has a right over you, your soul has a right over you, and your family has a right over you, so give each one their due right.” When they went to the Prophet ﷺ, he confirmed: “Salman has spoken the truth.” This changes everything about how we view boundaries in Islam.
The Prophet’s ﷺ Own Boundaries
How he said no to impossible requests, protected his family time, established limits on excessive worship, and rested during community service. If the Prophet ﷺ, the best of creation, had boundaries, why do you think you can’t?
La Darar Wa La Dirar
The Islamic legal principle that means “no harm and no reciprocating harm.” This hadith is your Islamic permission slip to protect yourself. Preventing harm takes precedence over securing benefits - meaning protecting yourself is MORE important than pleasing someone else.
The Guilt Trap
Why setting boundaries triggers panic in your nervous system, the difference between healthy guilt (taqwa) and toxic guilt (cultural conditioning), and how to discern what Allah wants vs. what your conditioning tells you.
5 Real-Life Scripts
Exact words to use when:
• Family wants you to host but you’re exhausted
• A friend drains you with late-night crisis calls
• Someone asks for favors you can’t give
• The masjid asks you to volunteer again
• Someone uses you as their emotional dumping ground
Stage 4: The Thorns (HAP Methodology)
Why your boundaries are like a rose’s thorns - not there to hurt people, but to protect your softness. Without boundaries, you can’t bloom into your feminine essence because you’re not safe.
The Deep Work
What to do when you still can’t say no even after learning all this. Why this means you need nervous system regulation and tazkiyah (heart purification), not just more information.
This Episode Is For You If:
→ You’re tired of being everyone’s unpaid therapist
→ You feel guilty when you disappoint others
→ You can quote Islamic principles but can’t live them when triggered
→ You think boundaries are selfish or un-Islamic
→ You’re ready for practical tools, not just theory
→ You want to learn how to say no without your hands shaking
About the Host:
Maariya has worked with Muslim women across 17 countries and is building the Heartful Community, a space where Muslim women learn to embody Islamic principles when their nervous systems are overwhelmed, not just know them intellectually.
The Heartful Community launches November 1st. Join the waitlist for early access starting October 25th.
Connect: Instagram, Facebook @HeartfulMuslimah
Next Episode (Oct 17): The Saviour’s Dilemma - Loving Without Losing Yourself
New episodes every Friday at 10 AM.