What does biblical manhood actually look like? Spoiler: it's not what you've been told. This sermon explores the story of Joseph—a carpenter who had every reason to walk away from Mary's inexplicable pregnancy but chose something more difficult: solidarity, humility, and embracing mystery over control. Pastor Tonetta draws from the metaphor of a Korean spa scrub to explore what we need to shed during Advent: patriarchy disguised as righteousness, charity that keeps us comfortable instead of solidarity that costs us something, and the false hope of optimism that crumbles when things go sideways. Joseph's power wasn't in control—it was in his subversive tenderness and willingness to not be the main character. If you're exhausted by shallow positivity and wondering what real hope looks like when the world feels dark, this is for you. Includes questions to sit with whether you hold privilege or need to ask for more support.