Birthday anniversaries can feel like a celebration and a bruise at the same time. In this episode, Julie shares the story of planning a memory-rich meal for her mom’s birthday—meatballs and all—and how her dad’s unexpected reaction reshaped the night. With insights aligned to Johns Hopkins’ note on “anniversary spinning” and VA guidance for difficult dates, she offers simple practices for holding rituals lightly, caring for your nervous system, and letting grief be honest—not tidy.