Eze and Olise may have moved on, but Palace are flying: 5th in the league, into the League Cup quarter-finals, and cruising in Europe so where is the Glasner slide? The boys dig into Landon Donovan’s bizarre comments about Glasner and Chris Richards, earning him a spot on the shit list, with Idris Elba narrowly avoiding joining him for calling us “Crystal.”

Palace Women spark the question: when was the last time you saw a headlock?

We relive the 2–0 win over Wolves on Hesketh’s 1000th Palace match, with Wharton shining and Pino sticking in a possible Goal of the Season contender.

Is a top-flight points record genuinely in sight for the Eagles?

Plus, a look ahead to Strasbourg, and Albert gets some essential French lessons for surviving the home end.

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