–This episode is sponsored by Truthly–

Questions answered this episode:

1. St. John Paul talks about woman being master of her own mystery—how a man must stand at the door and knock, then wait for her to open, even in marriage, respecting her right to reject his advances to the marital embrace. In light of this, how do we understand 1 Corinthians 7:4–5 (“the wife does not rule over her own body… Do not refuse one another except perhaps by agreement…”)? What does this mean? It seems to contradict JP2. I’ve also heard it used against NFP—how can I understand it in light of TOB and the Church’s teaching?
2. How do you handle sharing Theology of the Body in the current context, where our own leaders in the Church seem to more and more embrace the way of the world? Can you give advice on ways to share and teach the TOB message within our own diocese in this context—especially when facing barriers from our own priests and bishops?
3. I’m a happily married man in my early 60s. I had a vasectomy in my 20s after our third child, became Catholic in my 50s, and deeply regretted what I’d done to my body. I’ve gathered that when I make love to my wife it isn’t considered a truly marital act because my body is in a contraceptive state—even though she’s past menopause and cannot conceive. I’ve considered reversal, but I can’t afford it and I’m told it’s unlikely to work at my age; my non-Catholic wife isn’t supportive. Have you any consoling thoughts?

Resources:

Colorado Ski Retreat with Christopher

Good News About Sex & Marriage

If you are in financial need and honestly cannot afford a book or resource recommended on this podcast, contact: ⁠⁠michele@tobinstitute.org⁠⁠

Donate to the JPII Legacy Foundation

JPII Legacy Foundation Website

---

Ask Christopher West is a weekly podcast in which Theology of the Body Institute President Christopher West and his beloved wife Wendy share their humor and wisdom, answering questions about marriage, relationships, life, and the Catholic faith, all in light of John Paul II’s beautiful teachings on the Theology of the Body.

---

🔥 ⁠⁠⁠Get 3 FREE sessions of our flagship course on Theology of the Body⁠⁠⁠

📕 ⁠⁠⁠Get a copy of Christopher's Eating the Sunrise: Meditations on the Liturgy & Our Hunger for Beauty⁠⁠⁠

⚡️ Want to have a better chance of us answering your question and support the Theology of the Body Institute? ⁠⁠⁠Join our Patron Community!⁠⁠⁠

---

Submit you question here!

---

🎟️ Event Schedule

📚 ⁠⁠Course Schedule

🏔️ Pilgrimages

🧠 ⁠List of trusted counselors & psychologists⁠

*If you are in financial need and honestly cannot afford a book or resource recommended on this podcast, contact: ⁠⁠michele@tobinstitute.org⁠⁠

–This episode is sponsored by Truthly–

Questions answered this episode:

1. I am a theology teacher of high school students at a Catholic school. How do I joyfully proclaim Theology of the Body—or any Church teaching—when my students look like the walking dead? A coworker calls them spiritually dead. They don’t seem to care and they fall asleep in class. Satan has used all of that to make me question whether I’m in the right career. I think, if I was truly called, my students’ faith would come alive. How can I share this beautiful message with anyone who seems spiritually dead?
2. At age 60, I’m no longer interested in the marital act, and it is most painful and unpleasant—therefore, not happening. I am TOB savvy and preach it to everyone, but I’m not living it. I know the marital act rocks my husband’s world, but I cannot tolerate it. I’ve had medical procedures contributing to the unpleasantness. I probably should seek medical attention, but would rather not.
3. I am a priest and a religious. Throughout my formation, the emphasis was mostly on the challenging, sacrificial dimension of celibacy, but TOB has brought joy into living it. Celibacy feels like a continual discovery of God’s closeness and of living with the people entrusted to me. But I don’t know whether this fulfillment brings joy to the parts of me that desire a deeper, more personal gaze—and whether that gaze is reserved only for God. I’m not sure if I’m loved for my vocation or if I, Andrea, am worthy of love as a person. Can you help me understand this?
   

Resources:

JPII Legacy Foundation Website

Donate to the JPII Legacy Foundation

Colorado Ski Retreat with Christopher

Writings of JPII Course Link

TOB at the Movies eBook

Litanies of the Heart by Dr. Gerry Crete

Fr. John Cihak’s Article

---

Ask Christopher West is a weekly podcast in which Theology of the Body Institute President Christopher West and his beloved wife Wendy share their humor and wisdom, answering questions about marriage, relationships, life, and the Catholic faith, all in light of John Paul II’s beautiful teachings on the Theology of the Body.

---

🔥 ⁠⁠⁠Get 3 FREE sessions of our flagship course on Theology of the Body⁠⁠⁠

📕 ⁠⁠⁠Get a copy of Christopher's Eating the Sunrise: Meditations on the Liturgy & Our Hunger for Beauty⁠⁠⁠

⚡️ Want to have a better chance of us answering your question and support the Theology of the Body Institute? ⁠⁠⁠Join our Patron Community!⁠⁠⁠

---

Submit you question here!

---

🎟️ Event Schedule

📚 ⁠⁠Course Schedule

🏔️ Pilgrimages

🧠 ⁠List of trusted counselors & psychologists⁠

*If you are in financial need and honestly cannot afford a book or resource recommended on this podcast, contact: ⁠⁠michele@tobinstitute.org⁠⁠

–This episode is sponsored by Truthly–

Questions answered this episode:

1. There are many stories of Catholic men who experience same-sex attraction and go on to marry and have families, even though their predominant attraction remains toward men. Many encourage others not to dismiss marriage before exploring whether God could be calling them to it. I’m honestly confused. Would it be right for me to pursue a relationship with a woman without being attracted to her, without longing to share in the marital embrace? Some say attraction to their wives arose later in dating, but it doesn’t seem right to start a romantic relationship without attraction.
2. I’ve been struggling for many months with the sexual past of my boyfriend. It’s been really difficult not to take it personally—feeling deeply hurt and offended that he didn’t wait for me, even though we didn’t know one another when those things occurred. He is now committed to living chastely after realizing that fornication was unfulfilling and a lie, thanks be to God. How can I place the proper weight on his past without taking it personally in a way that sabotages the beautiful relationship we’ve built?
3. I converted to the Catholic faith 7 years ago from an atheistic background. From my parents I have a strong inclination to be a perfectionist, even during the marital embrace. I’m anxious not to fail, and I often think I will be a failure if we don’t get 3 children. We have 2 on earth and 1 in heaven. I feel unworthy compared with traditional huge Catholic families. How can I get rid of this anxiety and be free?

Resources:

Colorado Ski Retreat with Christopher

Sexual Integration & Redemption Course

Ask Christopher West is a weekly podcast in which Theology of the Body Institute President Christopher West and his beloved wife Wendy share their humor and wisdom, answering questions about marriage, relationships, life, and the Catholic faith, all in light of John Paul II’s beautiful teachings on the Theology of the Body.

---

🔥 ⁠⁠⁠Get 3 FREE sessions of our flagship course on Theology of the Body⁠⁠⁠

📕 ⁠⁠⁠Get a copy of Christopher's Eating the Sunrise: Meditations on the Liturgy & Our Hunger for Beauty⁠⁠⁠

⚡️ Want to have a better chance of us answering your question and support the Theology of the Body Institute? ⁠⁠⁠Join our Patron Community!⁠⁠⁠

---

Submit you question here!

---

🎟️ Event Schedule

📚 ⁠⁠Course Schedule

🏔️ Pilgrimages

🧠 ⁠List of trusted counselors & psychologists⁠

*If you are in financial need and honestly cannot afford a book or resource recommended on this podcast, contact: ⁠⁠michele@tobinstitute.org⁠⁠

Questions answered this episode:

1. I love marriage and my wife, but we’re facing our biggest challenge: understanding sex and its rightful place. We stayed chaste before marriage; I was a virgin and she’d been abstinent for years. I desire union daily, and while she enjoys our intimacy, she doesn’t need it as often, though she still wants affection. We’re trying to discern how often sex should happen within God’s plan. She fears being used because of past wounds, and I fear rejection when she’s not ready. I worry her “no” means I’ve failed her. Since marrying, sex dominates my thoughts, and it’s becoming a burden.
2. About ten years ago, at 45, I learned I carry a genetic marker for several cancers. Two of my sisters with the same marker developed endometrial and ovarian cancer. I later became a breast cancer survivor, another cancer on the list. My doctor told me there’s no good screening for ovarian cancer and strongly urged a hysterectomy, since pregnancy was unlikely and ovarian cancer is often detected too late. I chose the hysterectomy to prevent cancer, not pregnancy. But after studying Theology of the Body, I’m questioning that decision. What does the Church teach in a case like mine?
3. My wife and I had two miscarriages this year, and the pain has been deep. She is angry with God, and I realized I repressed my own grief until recently. Now I often fight back tears and long for our two children. We keep asking God why. I can’t imagine how this suffering could be glorified here. Are some sufferings only understood in heaven? I also wonder whether physical imperfections like illness or miscarriage are God’s doing or simply consequences of human freedom. I doubt whether prayer can change anything, yet I still love God even as I struggle with doubts about His omnipotence.
   

Resources:

JPII Legacy Foundation Website

Donate to the JPII Legacy Foundation

Course Schedule

Ask Christopher West is a weekly podcast in which Theology of the Body Institute President Christopher West and his beloved wife Wendy share their humor and wisdom, answering questions about marriage, relationships, life, and the Catholic faith, all in light of John Paul II’s beautiful teachings on the Theology of the Body.

---

🔥 ⁠⁠⁠Get 3 FREE sessions of our flagship course on Theology of the Body⁠⁠⁠

📕 ⁠⁠⁠Get a copy of Christopher's Eating the Sunrise: Meditations on the Liturgy & Our Hunger for Beauty⁠⁠⁠

⚡️ Want to have a better chance of us answering your question and support the Theology of the Body Institute? ⁠⁠⁠Join our Patron Community!⁠⁠⁠

---

Submit you question here!

---

🎟️ Event Schedule

📚 ⁠⁠Course Schedule

🏔️ Pilgrimages

🧠 ⁠List of trusted counselors & psychologists⁠

*If you are in financial need and honestly cannot afford a book or resource recommended on this podcast, contact: ⁠⁠michele@tobinstitute.org⁠⁠

Questions answered this episode:

1. I’d like your opinion on popular songs that celebrate the pleasures of sexual union, like that Marvin Gaye song. Can their meaning—or the passions they stir—be redeemed within marriage? It seems many of these songs aren’t good in most contexts, especially those that objectify people. But are some of them acceptable for married couples to listen to privately, if the lyrics don’t violate the personalistic norm and actually draw one’s mind to the joy of union with one’s spouse? I’d love to hear your thoughts.
2. I’m engaged, and after 1.5 years together we’ve had ongoing difficulties. My fiancé has a very strong desire for union with me—not just sexually, but in living together and loving without limits. His desire is so strong that he becomes deeply frustrated by the limits of a premarital relationship, and he grows distant when that frustration hits. He even says it pains him to be with me. His distance makes me hesitant to marry him. It feels unnatural that Eros could be so strong it can’t endure normal premarital boundaries, and it scares me. Is this normal?
3. I’m a young Catholic woman still in love with a man I met in high school. Back then I felt something spiritual between us—a quiet sense of God saying, “Behold your husband.” He was the first person I ever saw receive the Eucharist kneeling and on the tongue, and it struck me deeply. Though we never acted on anything, seven years later my feelings remain, even though he’s dating someone else and has made choices against his faith. I pray for him daily, but I’m torn: do these prayers honor God, or keep me stuck? Should I keep praying for him or prepare my heart for the husband God intends?
   

Resources:

JPII Legacy Foundation Website

Donate to the JPII Legacy Foundation

Event Schedule

Ask Christopher West is a weekly podcast in which Theology of the Body Institute President Christopher West and his beloved wife Wendy share their humor and wisdom, answering questions about marriage, relationships, life, and the Catholic faith, all in light of John Paul II’s beautiful teachings on the Theology of the Body.

---

🔥 ⁠⁠⁠Get 3 FREE sessions of our flagship course on Theology of the Body⁠⁠⁠

📕 ⁠⁠⁠Get a copy of Christopher's Eating the Sunrise: Meditations on the Liturgy & Our Hunger for Beauty⁠⁠⁠

⚡️ Want to have a better chance of us answering your question and support the Theology of the Body Institute? ⁠⁠⁠Join our Patron Community!⁠⁠⁠

---

Submit you question here!

---

🎟️ Event Schedule

📚 ⁠⁠Course Schedule

🏔️ Pilgrimages

🧠 ⁠List of trusted counselors & psychologists⁠

*If you are in financial need and honestly cannot afford a book or resource recommended on this podcast, contact: ⁠⁠michele@tobinstitute.org⁠⁠

Questions answered this episode:

1. I’m a 24-year-old single woman who has never dated. I want to be married, but it’s a passive desire—I’m content and open if something comes my way. I don’t ache for marriage the way others do, and I don’t feel called to chase it. People tell me I’m wasting my twenties and question if I even want a family. I do want marriage, just no one has interested me yet. I don’t think God is asking me to hunt for a spouse. Does that make sense, or am I being foolish?
2. My husband and I have used NFP for 20 years, but during my fertile times he tempts me daily for intimacy. I resist for a few days but usually cave once a month, leading to intercourse where only I climax. It’s very hard to stop, and I’m always the one trying, which leaves me feeling guilty. I love our intimacy but resent his lack of restraint. A priest once told me confessing this monthly means it’s mortal sin, but I can’t find why. Can you shed light on this?
3. I struggle with unwanted arousal around my fiancée—holding hands, hugging, sitting close, even certain voice inflections. Sometimes there’s slight discharge without erection or intent. I feel terrible afterward and replay everything to see if I consented. A priest and therapist have both told me it’s natural and I lack culpability, but I still worry because I’ve read that near-complete pleasure can be gravely sinful. I’m trying to understand if these involuntary reactions are sinful. Please help a confused brother in Christ.
   

Resources:

⁠⁠Course Schedule

JPII Legacy Foundation Website

Good News About Sex & Marriage

Love & Responsibility YouTube Series

---

Ask Christopher West is a weekly podcast in which Theology of the Body Institute President Christopher West and his beloved wife Wendy share their humor and wisdom, answering questions about marriage, relationships, life, and the Catholic faith, all in light of John Paul II’s beautiful teachings on the Theology of the Body.

---

🔥 ⁠⁠⁠Get 3 FREE sessions of our flagship course on Theology of the Body⁠⁠⁠

📕 ⁠⁠⁠Get a copy of Christopher's Eating the Sunrise: Meditations on the Liturgy & Our Hunger for Beauty⁠⁠⁠

⚡️ Want to have a better chance of us answering your question and support the Theology of the Body Institute? ⁠⁠⁠Join our Patron Community!⁠⁠⁠

---

Submit you question here!

---

🎟️ Event Schedule

📚 ⁠⁠Course Schedule

🏔️ Pilgrimages

🧠 ⁠List of trusted counselors & psychologists⁠

*If you are in financial need and honestly cannot afford a book or resource recommended on this podcast, contact: ⁠⁠michele@tobinstitute.org⁠⁠

Questions answered this episode:

1. Right now, I'm learning about cycles and fertility using the Creighton method. One main point is that the man is always fertile while the woman is infertile most of the time. I’m wondering if there’s a theology behind that—especially since the man typically initiates and is constantly fertile. What do you think is the significance of this?
2. I'm dating and love your podcast. I'm in a serious relationship but still in college, so marriage is likely two years away. When do you recommend reading Good News About Sex and Marriage? I viewed pornography in early high school but, with God’s grace, have been free for years. Still, twisted ideas about sexuality linger. I long for God’s truth—could reading these sources bring healing and help untwist what remains twisted in me?
3. I feel like modesty conversations are objectifying. Why talk about me as if I’m just pieces to cover? Secular friends see me as a whole person, but religious people seem to see only skin. You say there are no abstract breasts, yet I’m told to cover mine because they “distract” from me—even though they are me. If the body isn’t bad, why hide it? If others can look purely, why must I be my brother’s keeper? Can’t we stop sexualizing everything instead of keeping it taboo?

Resources:

Course Schedule

JPII Legacy Foundation Website

Good News About Sex & Marriage

Ask Christopher West is a weekly podcast in which Theology of the Body Institute President Christopher West and his beloved wife Wendy share their humor and wisdom, answering questions about marriage, relationships, life, and the Catholic faith, all in light of John Paul II’s beautiful teachings on the Theology of the Body.

---

🔥 ⁠⁠⁠Get 3 FREE sessions of our flagship course on Theology of the Body⁠⁠⁠

📕 ⁠⁠⁠Get a copy of Christopher's Eating the Sunrise: Meditations on the Liturgy & Our Hunger for Beauty⁠⁠⁠

⚡️ Want to have a better chance of us answering your question and support the Theology of the Body Institute? ⁠⁠⁠Join our Patron Community!⁠⁠⁠

---

Submit you question here!

---

🎟️ Event Schedule

📚 ⁠⁠Course Schedule

🏔️ Pilgrimages

🧠 ⁠List of trusted counselors & psychologists⁠

*If you are in financial need and honestly cannot afford a book or resource recommended on this podcast, contact: ⁠⁠michele@tobinstitute.org⁠⁠

Questions answered this episode:

1. I admire my Catholic family, but I struggle to receive advice from my parents. I’m academically gifted and study philosophy, theology, and psychology of relationships, while they don’t share my passion for ideas. When they give advice, I often think, “I’ve already considered that,” or, “There’s a deeper understanding.” I know their long marriage brings wisdom, but I don’t always appreciate it. What insight can you offer from your own experience about respecting and learning from parental wisdom in relationships?
2. Can male climax occur outside the womb if the couple intends to climax in the womb immediately afterward? I’m curious about how this aligns with Theology of the Body and marital intimacy.
3. I’m writing about Christ as bridegroom in every Christian’s life. I understand it in religious or consecrated life, but how does it apply to married people? Are there resources, including John Paul II, that discuss this? How should non-consecrated Christians live out this reality in prayer and daily life?

Resources:

Course Schedule

Mulieris Dignitatem Document

---

Ask Christopher West is a weekly podcast in which Theology of the Body Institute President Christopher West and his beloved wife Wendy share their humor and wisdom, answering questions about marriage, relationships, life, and the Catholic faith, all in light of John Paul II’s beautiful teachings on the Theology of the Body.

---

🔥 ⁠⁠⁠Get 3 FREE sessions of our flagship course on Theology of the Body⁠⁠⁠

📕 ⁠⁠⁠Get a copy of Christopher's Eating the Sunrise: Meditations on the Liturgy & Our Hunger for Beauty⁠⁠⁠

⚡️ Want to have a better chance of us answering your question and support the Theology of the Body Institute? ⁠⁠⁠Join our Patron Community!⁠⁠⁠

---

Submit you question here!

---

🎟️ Event Schedule

📚 ⁠⁠Course Schedule

🏔️ Pilgrimages

🧠 ⁠List of trusted counselors & psychologists⁠

*If you are in financial need and honestly cannot afford a book or resource recommended on this podcast, contact: ⁠⁠michele@tobinstitute.org⁠⁠

Questions answered this episode:

1. I’ve been married for almost 25 years. My husband has been verbally abusive and sexually misused me, though we’re now on a path of healing and reconciliation. Because of the deep wounds, I haven’t been able to have sex with him since our separation a year and a half ago. I’m slowly learning forgiveness, but his anger over the lack of sex makes it hard. He says things like, “No loving Christian woman would make a guy wait this long.” How can I find genuine desire again after so much damage to my heart?
2. My friend, who identifies as non-binary, had masculinizing chest surgery. I knew about her plans but never dissuaded her or shared my faith. I even drove her to her first post-op appointment. Now I feel I failed to answer God’s call to speak truth. She may think I support her decision and doesn’t know I’m Catholic. I pray for her and want to reflect on what happened—how to seek God’s grace for us both and how to be a better friend in Christ moving forward.
3. Coming from a Protestant background, I’m now more open to icons and statues but still struggle with the physical gestures of veneration. I understand the honor is for the person represented, not the image, yet verses like Revelation 19:10 trouble me. I love sacred art but hesitate with bowing or kissing images. How does Theology of the Body help explain this kind of devotion?

Resources:

Word Made Fresh Podcast

Good News About Sex & Marriage

Love & Responsibility YouTube Series

---

Ask Christopher West is a weekly podcast in which Theology of the Body Institute President Christopher West and his beloved wife Wendy share their humor and wisdom, answering questions about marriage, relationships, life, and the Catholic faith, all in light of John Paul II’s beautiful teachings on the Theology of the Body.

---

🔥 ⁠⁠⁠Get 3 FREE sessions of our flagship course on Theology of the Body⁠⁠⁠

📕 ⁠⁠⁠Get a copy of Christopher's Eating the Sunrise: Meditations on the Liturgy & Our Hunger for Beauty⁠⁠⁠

⚡️ Want to have a better chance of us answering your question and support the Theology of the Body Institute? ⁠⁠⁠Join our Patron Community!⁠⁠⁠

---

Submit you question here!

---

🎟️ Event Schedule

📚 ⁠⁠Course Schedule

🏔️ Pilgrimages

🧠 ⁠List of trusted counselors & psychologists⁠

*If you are in financial need and honestly cannot afford a book or resource recommended on this podcast, contact: ⁠⁠michele@tobinstitute.org⁠⁠

Questions answered this episode:

• I don't think I have numbed myself or shut down my desires, but I think I may have never learned how to be in touch with them. I don't ever feel aroused or even really desirous of anything. I thought it was because I was blessed with purity, chastity, and temperance, but I'm wondering if I'm actually lacking something or disordered because I don't feel like there's anything that I'm channeling or putting into right order. I'm just existing in what seems like a non-problematic way, but I'm not sure.
• My girlfriend and I are involved in Catholic ministry work, and we've been friends for over 7 years. We've been dating for just over a month, but we know each other very well. I feel like we could move forward faster than a typical timeline, but I'm not sure if I can trust that instinct. Do you have any suggestions about how we can prudently move forward?
• I am a Catholic wife in my late twenties with one toddler son and one on the way. We've been married for 3.5 years, and sex has never been easy for me. I've tried seeing a pelvic floor physical therapist, but every embrace remained painful, even more so after I was diagnosed with PCOS and endometriosis. I'm wondering how I can reframe my thinking so I don't try to avoid marital relations or resent God for giving me this cross and making it difficult to connect with my husband physically. We do have great intimacy via communication and conversation, but sometimes it's not enough. We crave the physical connection, yet I always end up sad after the embrace because it is so painful.

Resources:

Love & Responsibility Course

Sexual Integration & Redemption Course

Are you ready for marriage? Check out Next Step: A Course for Discerning Marriage

Restorative Reproductive Medicine

Ask Christopher West is a weekly podcast in which Theology of the Body Institute President Christopher West and his beloved wife Wendy share their humor and wisdom, answering questions about marriage, relationships, life, and the Catholic faith, all in light of John Paul II’s beautiful teachings on the Theology of the Body.

---

🔥 ⁠⁠⁠Get 3 FREE sessions of our flagship course on Theology of the Body⁠⁠⁠

📕 ⁠⁠⁠Get a copy of Christopher's Eating the Sunrise: Meditations on the Liturgy & Our Hunger for Beauty⁠⁠⁠

⚡️ Want to have a better chance of us answering your question and support the Theology of the Body Institute? ⁠⁠⁠Join our Patron Community!⁠⁠⁠

---

Submit you question here!

---

🎟️ Event Schedule

📚 ⁠⁠Course Schedule

🏔️ Pilgrimages

If you are in financial need and honestly cannot afford a book or resource recommended on this podcast, contact: ⁠⁠michele@tobinstitute.org⁠⁠

⁠List of trusted counselors & psychologists⁠

Questions answered this episode:

1. As I understand it, sacraments need the correct form and matter to be valid. What about marriage? I wonder if true marital sex is part of that form and matter, and if using contraception or not being open to life disrupts the grace that flows through the sacrament. In our marriage, we’ve experienced deep grace through healthy sexual intimacy and NFP, and I sense this grace comes not just from avoiding sin, but directly from the physical marital union that’s healed and unified us after years of brokenness.
2. My husband of 25 years is battling aggressive cancer and undergoing chemo, which will lead to erectile dysfunction. His doctors say we must use condoms if we want to be intimate during treatment because the chemicals could harm me. We’ve never used contraception and don’t want to commit mortal sin. We’re in our late 40s and still practicing NFP. Given our situation, can we morally use condoms during chemo for safety, or would that violate Church teaching?
3. I’m a man in my early twenties who’s long experienced strong same-sex attraction, though I also feel a more romantic, non-sexual attraction toward women. I’ve tried to see the beauty of men as a reflection of God’s design, yet I feel shame and confusion, wondering if this admiration is wrong. I want to be a true man, love women rightly, and one day marry and have a family. What should I do with these feelings and desires? 

Resources:

Love & Responsibility Course

Sexual Integration & Redemption Course

Setting Love in Order Book

⁠List of trusted counselors & psychologists⁠

⁠⁠⁠Join our Patron Community!⁠⁠⁠

---

Ask Christopher West is a weekly podcast in which Theology of the Body Institute President Christopher West and his beloved wife Wendy share their humor and wisdom, answering questions about marriage, relationships, life, and the Catholic faith, all in light of John Paul II’s beautiful teachings on the Theology of the Body.

---

🔥 ⁠⁠⁠Get 3 FREE sessions of our flagship course on Theology of the Body⁠⁠⁠

📕 ⁠⁠⁠Get a copy of Christopher's Eating the Sunrise: Meditations on the Liturgy & Our Hunger for Beauty⁠⁠⁠

⚡️ Want to have a better chance of us answering your question and support the Theology of the Body Institute? ⁠⁠⁠Join our Patron Community!⁠⁠⁠

---

Submit you question here!

---

🎟️ Event Schedule

📚 ⁠⁠Course Schedule

🏔️ Pilgrimages

If you are in financial need and honestly cannot afford a book or resource recommended on this podcast, contact: ⁠⁠michele@tobinstitute.org⁠⁠

⁠List of trusted counselors & psychologists⁠

Questions answered this episode:

1. I’m growing close to a woman from my parish, and our relationship may become romantic. I need to disclose my long history of solitary sin and pornography use, which I no longer struggle with, but I’ve recently remembered past acts and fantasies. I’ve taken these to prayer and confession, but I worry she will reject me if I share. What level of detail is prudent to disclose? I struggle with scrupulosity, making it hard to know whether withholding details would be dishonest or manipulative.

2. I’ve struggled to love my body for years. Pole fitness classes have built my strength and confidence, healing some self-hatred. I avoid erotic dance, focusing on strength-based moves. My question is: is it wrong to continue these pole fitness classes? They’ve brought much good to my life, and I want to ensure my hobbies are pleasing to God.

3. I’m newly married and expecting our first child. We’re excited but nervous, hearing how hard parenting can strain marriages. I worry the struggle will create distance and conflict between us. How can we maintain our love and focus while keeping our sanity during pregnancy and early child-rearing?

Resources:

College of St. Joseph the Worker

Course Schedule

JPII Legacy Foundation Website

---

Ask Christopher West is a weekly podcast in which Theology of the Body Institute President Christopher West and his beloved wife Wendy share their humor and wisdom, answering questions about marriage, relationships, life, and the Catholic faith, all in light of John Paul II’s beautiful teachings on the Theology of the Body.

---

🔥 ⁠⁠⁠Get 3 FREE sessions of our flagship course on Theology of the Body⁠⁠⁠

📕 ⁠⁠⁠Get a copy of Christopher's Eating the Sunrise: Meditations on the Liturgy & Our Hunger for Beauty⁠⁠⁠

⚡️ Want to have a better chance of us answering your question and support the Theology of the Body Institute? ⁠⁠⁠Join our Patron Community!⁠⁠⁠

---

Submit you question here!

---

🎟️ Event Schedule

📚 ⁠⁠Course Schedule

🏔️ Pilgrimages

If you are in financial need and honestly cannot afford a book or resource recommended on this podcast, contact: ⁠⁠michele@tobinstitute.org⁠⁠

⁠List of trusted counselors & psychologists⁠

Questions answered this episode:

1. Could you explain the purpose of cloistered monks and nuns in light of theology of the body? We’re made for relationships through our bodies, yet they live in isolation and silence. Is their life like priestly celibacy—foregoing something of this world for the sake of the kingdom?
2. My wife and I had our first child 11 months ago, and I’ve been trying to honor her body and timeline. But I feel like I have little agency in our discernment since she insists we never have sex during fertile windows. How can I ask good, gentle questions to see if she’s truly open to the Lord with her body and heart?
3. I’ve been married seven years and long to love my husband well, but it’s so hard. I fall often and feel helpless, aware of my weakness and need for grace. I also struggle with self-hatred and wonder if my difficulty loving him comes from not loving myself. What are your thoughts?

Resources:

TOB Survey

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Ask Christopher West is a weekly podcast in which Theology of the Body Institute President Christopher West and his beloved wife Wendy share their humor and wisdom, answering questions about marriage, relationships, life, and the Catholic faith, all in light of John Paul II’s beautiful teachings on the Theology of the Body.

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🎟️ Event Schedule

📚 ⁠⁠Course Schedule

🏔️ Pilgrimages

If you are in financial need and honestly cannot afford a book or resource recommended on this podcast, contact: ⁠⁠michele@tobinstitute.org⁠⁠

⁠List of trusted counselors & psychologists⁠

Questions answered this episode:

1. Before my reversion, my husband and I conceived both our children through IVF. Now I feel deep shame, even worrying my sin might harm them eternally. A friend once told me IVF babies don’t have souls, which horrified me. Do I need to tell my children how they were conceived, and if so, how do I do it without passing on my shame? What truth can I hold on to about their dignity and worth as beloved children of God?
2. As a spiritual director, I know a young couple, married two years, who are struggling with sexual intimacy. The wife says this part of their marriage is nearly nonexistent. I fear this could damage their relationship and I’m unsure how to guide them. Do you have any recommendations?
3. I’m an evangelical Christian, and my girlfriend and I hope to marry and have kids. She has type 1 diabetes, which makes pregnancy more complicated and risky. I’m drawn to the Catholic view of openness to life and natural family planning, but she doesn’t have strong theological views about birth control. How can we talk about family planning in a loving way that respects our faith, her medical needs, and the challenges of pregnancy?

Resources:

TOB1 On Demand

Our Bodies Tells God's Story Book

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Ask Christopher West is a weekly podcast in which Theology of the Body Institute President Christopher West and his beloved wife Wendy share their humor and wisdom, answering questions about marriage, relationships, life, and the Catholic faith, all in light of John Paul II’s beautiful teachings on the Theology of the Body.

---

🔥 ⁠⁠⁠Get 3 FREE sessions of our flagship course on Theology of the Body⁠⁠⁠

📕 ⁠⁠⁠Get a copy of Christopher's Eating the Sunrise: Meditations on the Liturgy & Our Hunger for Beauty⁠⁠⁠

⚡️ Want to have a better chance of us answering your question and support the Theology of the Body Institute? ⁠⁠⁠Join our Patron Community!⁠⁠⁠

---

Submit you question here!

---

🎟️ Event Schedule

📚 ⁠⁠Course Schedule

🏔️ Pilgrimages

If you are in financial need and honestly cannot afford a book or resource recommended on this podcast, contact: ⁠⁠michele@tobinstitute.org⁠⁠

⁠List of trusted counselors & psychologists⁠

Questions answered this episode:

1. I’m struggling to find a spiritual director who can really speak to my heart. The priests I’ve met at the Institute understand integration deeply, but I can’t find anyone like that locally. My current director stays in the intellectual and rational, but I long to share my heart—its joys, sorrows, and complexities. How can I do that if I can’t find a priest who can truly receive it?
2. My girlfriend and I want to get engaged soon. I’ve battled a masturbation addiction for 15 years, and while I’m free from porn, I’m not fully healed. In Next Step we were warned not to expect marriage to fix this. Should I wait until I’m chaste to propose, or move forward in trust? I don’t want sin to hold us back, but I also don’t know if I can fully be a gift.
3. I’m 82, and Jesus revealed himself to me as bridegroom nearly 60 years ago. I thought I was alone in this until your ministry confirmed what I’ve long believed. After two abusive marriages and decades of celibacy, I live in longing for the marriage supper of the Lamb. At times, I’ve ached so deeply for Jesus it felt like being separated from a beloved husband before consummation—sweet but painful. Is this longing normal, or am I treading on ground too sacred?

Resources:

Søgen Spotify

Event Schedule

Freedom Coaching

Ecstasy of Saint Teresa

Our Bodies Tells God's Story Book

Eating the Sunrise

Ask Christopher West is a weekly podcast in which Theology of the Body Institute President Christopher West and his beloved wife Wendy share their humor and wisdom, answering questions about marriage, relationships, life, and the Catholic faith, all in light of John Paul II’s beautiful teachings on the Theology of the Body.

---

🔥 ⁠⁠⁠Get 3 FREE sessions of our flagship course on Theology of the Body⁠⁠⁠

📕 ⁠⁠⁠Get a copy of Christopher's Eating the Sunrise: Meditations on the Liturgy & Our Hunger for Beauty⁠⁠⁠

⚡️ Want to have a better chance of us answering your question and support the Theology of the Body Institute? ⁠⁠⁠Join our Patron Community!⁠⁠⁠

---

Submit you question here!

---

🎟️ Event Schedule

📚 ⁠⁠Course Schedule

🏔️ Pilgrimages

If you are in financial need and honestly cannot afford a book or resource recommended on this podcast, contact: ⁠⁠michele@tobinstitute.org⁠⁠

⁠List of trusted counselors & psychologists⁠

Questions answered this episode:

1. You said heaven is more real than this world, and Mary already lives there in her redeemed body. In prayer, I sometimes feel Jesus and Mary present, but not like it will be in heaven. How can the mystical dimension be more real than what I see daily? Can you give me concrete ways to live this spiritual reality now, not just in holy moments or in the future?
2. I’ve struggled for years with an eating disorder, along with lust and masturbation. I’m a woman who feels deep shame, self-hatred, and hopelessness. I wonder if these struggles are connected, and I feel like I lack self-control and keep failing God. The more I fall, the more I hate myself and my body. Can God really love me in this?
3. At a party, a woman mentioned being given the book Holy Sex. The group reacted dismissively, joking about hiding it. I felt confused, hurt, and angry, because for me learning the holiness of marital intimacy was liberating. I tried to engage her, but the conversation went nowhere, and I left upset. What do you think was going on with these women?

Resources:

JPII Legacy Foundation Website

THEOLOGY OF THE BODY FOR BEGINNERS - UPDATED, REVISED & EXPANDED 2018 (PAPERBACK)

Holy Sex!: A Catholic Guide to Toe-Curling, Mind-Blowing, Infallible Loving

Ask Christopher West is a weekly podcast in which Theology of the Body Institute President Christopher West and his beloved wife Wendy share their humor and wisdom, answering questions about marriage, relationships, life, and the Catholic faith, all in light of John Paul II’s beautiful teachings on the Theology of the Body.

---

🔥 ⁠⁠⁠Get 3 FREE sessions of our flagship course on Theology of the Body⁠⁠⁠

📕 ⁠⁠⁠Get a copy of Christopher's Eating the Sunrise: Meditations on the Liturgy & Our Hunger for Beauty⁠⁠⁠

⚡️ Want to have a better chance of us answering your question and support the Theology of the Body Institute? ⁠⁠⁠Join our Patron Community!⁠⁠⁠

---

Submit you question here!

---

🎟️ Event Schedule

📚 ⁠⁠Course Schedule

🏔️ Pilgrimages

If you are in financial need and honestly cannot afford a book or resource recommended on this podcast, contact: ⁠⁠michele@tobinstitute.org⁠⁠

⁠List of trusted counselors & psychologists⁠

Questions answered this episode:

1. I was addicted to pornography until my mid-twenties but have lived chastely for 12 years. Still, I struggle with scars: working as a physician, I get tempted by seeing women’s bodies. I pray in those moments, but I still desire to look, searching for a “moral excuse.” I’ve been dating someone who knows in general, but I can’t tell her every time. Why hasn’t this stopped, even though she fills my heart? Is this from pornography, or something deeper?

2. I’m dating a man who loves TOB, and we’ve built a childlike friendship where we can be ourselves. We both think God may be calling us to marriage, but how do I know for sure? My past dating has often ended in disappointment, but this relationship feels different—we strive for virtue together. I want to balance my desire to be a gift in marriage with God’s plan, but I’m afraid of the future and struggle to surrender completely.

3. I understand Mariology is deeply tied to TOB, but what about Saint Joseph? I rarely see his role explained. How is his mission interwoven with TOB?

Resources:

Are you ready for marriage? Check out Next Step: A Course for Discerning Marriage

CONSECRATION TO JESUS THROUGH ST. JOSEPH: AN INTEGRATED LOOK AT THE HOLY FAMILY

REDEMPTORIS CUSTOS by JPII

PATRIS CORDE by Pope Francis

Symposium | The Josephology Society

Ask Christopher West is a weekly podcast in which Theology of the Body Institute President Christopher West and his beloved wife Wendy share their humor and wisdom, answering questions about marriage, relationships, life, and the Catholic faith, all in light of John Paul II’s beautiful teachings on the Theology of the Body.

---

🔥 ⁠⁠⁠Get 3 FREE sessions of our flagship course on Theology of the Body⁠⁠⁠

📕 ⁠⁠⁠Get a copy of Christopher's Eating the Sunrise: Meditations on the Liturgy & Our Hunger for Beauty⁠⁠⁠

⚡️ Want to have a better chance of us answering your question and support the Theology of the Body Institute? ⁠⁠⁠Join our Patron Community!⁠⁠⁠

---

Submit you question here!

---

🎟️ Event Schedule

📚 ⁠⁠Course Schedule

🏔️ Pilgrimages

If you are in financial need and honestly cannot afford a book or resource recommended on this podcast, contact: ⁠⁠michele@tobinstitute.org⁠⁠

⁠List of trusted counselors & psychologists⁠

Questions answered this episode:

1. For most of my young adulthood, I pictured myself married, but recently I’ve felt a pull toward religious life. It’s brought many tears, and I struggle with the thought of giving up the intimacy of marriage. Can you explain how Theology of the Body applies to religious sisters and how God fulfills our longing for intimacy in religious life?
2. I dated a girl for almost a year, saved a ring, and thought she was the one. Then suddenly she ended it, and the pain feels unbearable. I wonder if I’ll ever be chosen by a woman, even while hoping she might return. Please, any prayers or wisdom are welcome.
3. How can we raise children with Theology of the Body in mind? Specifically, when he touches his genitals during diaper changes or baths, how should we handle it without repressing him or shaming his body?

Resources:

Fresh Start: A Dating & Discerning Marriage Conference

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Ask Christopher West is a weekly podcast in which Theology of the Body Institute President Christopher West and his beloved wife Wendy share their humor and wisdom, answering questions about marriage, relationships, life, and the Catholic faith, all in light of John Paul II’s beautiful teachings on the Theology of the Body.

---

🔥 ⁠⁠⁠Get 3 FREE sessions of our flagship course on Theology of the Body⁠⁠⁠

📕 ⁠⁠⁠Get a copy of Christopher's Eating the Sunrise: Meditations on the Liturgy & Our Hunger for Beauty⁠⁠⁠

⚡️ Want to support the Theology of the Body Institute and have a better chance of us answering your question? ⁠⁠⁠Join our Patron Community!⁠⁠⁠

---

Submit you question here!

---

🎟️ Event Schedule

📚 ⁠⁠Course Schedule

🏔️ Pilgrimages

If you are in financial need and honestly cannot afford a book or resource recommended on this podcast, contact: ⁠⁠michele@tobinstitute.org⁠⁠

⁠List of trusted counselors & psychologists⁠

Questions answered this episode:

1. Five years ago I discovered Theology of the Body, and it transformed me. Since then, I’ve wrestled with balancing modesty and femininity. I’ve stopped self-tanning and wearing heavy makeup because they felt like a mask. As a single woman desiring marriage, I want to look my best but not rely on things that hide my true self. My mom says I should wear more makeup, especially on dates, which makes me feel like I’m not good enough naturally. How do I present myself beautifully and confidently without overusing makeup, and what’s the morality of cosmetics, hair dye, and tanning?
2. I’ve been discerning marriage, but I don’t feel mentally healthy enough to raise children. Even if I overcome anxiety, knowing how quickly mental health can collapse makes me fear the responsibility of another life. Because of this, I’ve considered a Josephite marriage. But a sexless marriage fills me with sadness, partly because it reminds me of my illness. Do you have any guidance for me?
3. For years I failed as a husband, hurting my wife verbally and emotionally. By God’s grace, I’ve turned around, and she’s still here, but she does little to actively seek healing for our marriage. I know the damage is my fault, yet I still feel frustrated that she isn’t more proactive—and then I beat myself up for even being frustrated. What advice do you have for a husband who caused the wounds but struggles when the one hurt won’t do more?

Resources:

⁠⁠COURSE SCHEDULE⁠⁠

Instagram Video Link

Colbie Caillat - Try

List of Counselors & Psychologists⁠

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Ask Christopher West is a weekly podcast in which Theology of the Body Institute President Christopher West and his beloved wife Wendy share their humor and wisdom, answering questions about marriage, relationships, life, and the Catholic faith, all in light of John Paul II’s beautiful teachings on the Theology of the Body.

---

🔥 ⁠⁠⁠Get 3 FREE sessions of our flagship course on Theology of the Body⁠⁠⁠

📕 ⁠⁠⁠Get a copy of Christopher's Eating the Sunrise: Meditations on the Liturgy & Our Hunger for Beauty⁠⁠⁠

⚡️ Want to support the Theology of the Body Institute and have a better chance of us answering your question? ⁠⁠⁠Join our Patron Community!⁠⁠⁠

---

Submit you question here!

---

🎟️ Event Schedule

📚 ⁠⁠Course Schedule

🏔️ Pilgrimages

If you are in financial need and honestly cannot afford a book or resource recommended on this podcast, contact: ⁠⁠michele@tobinstitute.org⁠⁠

⁠List of trusted counselors & psychologists⁠

Questions answered this episode:

1. You often say to bring desires to Jesus or Mary, but when I do, nothing happens. Prayer, stillness, and adoration haven’t helped. Years of silence have made me see Jesus less as a loving bridegroom and more as someone withholding, disappearing at my slightest mistake. I know that’s not who He is, but I can’t shake the image. I want to love God for Himself, not His gifts, but sometimes I want to harden my heart to avoid feeling. Pornography has touched my deep desires in ways God hasn’t. Even when sober, He feels distant, and I can’t find a holy substitute.
2. As a Catholic trying to live purity and modesty, is extended private nudity unadvisable? I know it’s likely not sinful in itself, but it could be a near occasion of sin, especially for unmarried people. As a college-aged man, I’ve struggled with pornography and masturbation, which has led me to feel a certain disdain for my genitals. I wonder if spending more time unclothed in private could help me appreciate my body as God created it, or if it would invite temptation given my past. What about sleeping in the nude—would that be harmless or spiritually risky for me?
3. I believe arousal is a beautiful, God-given reaction when kept pure. But I’ve accidentally reached sexual climax with my boyfriend, and I struggle to know when my body is close. For example, after a gentle goodbye kiss and embrace, I walked away and unexpectedly experienced an orgasm. I knew I was aroused, but didn’t realize it was that strong. I’m deeply in love and attracted to him, but I didn’t know I was that aroused. Is this irresponsibility, or a lack of knowledge of my own body and heart? How should I understand and handle these moments?

Resources:

https://nationalcatholicsingles.com/

Grand Canyon by Jay & Jo




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🔥 ⁠⁠⁠Get 3 FREE sessions of our flagship course on Theology of the Body⁠⁠⁠




📕 ⁠⁠⁠Get a copy of Christopher's Eating the Sunrise: Meditations on the Liturgy & Our Hunger for Beauty⁠⁠⁠




⚡️ Want to support the Theology of the Body Institute and have a better chance of us answering your question? ⁠⁠⁠Join our Patron Community!⁠⁠⁠




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If you are in financial need and honestly cannot afford a book or resource recommended on this podcast, contact: ⁠⁠michele@tobinstitute.org⁠⁠

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