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Bible Stories for Blasphemers
Dan Rogland and Mariah Wren
64 episodes
7 months ago
Happy upload day, blasphemers! This week we introduce Micah, one of the last judges! Also explore topics of idols, and live-in priests! And in this week's Pop Corner, camp counselor Dan tells us all about the pagan god Pan! Follow & DM us on Instagram @bs4blasphemers Send us an email at biblestoriesforblasphemers@gmail.com
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All content for Bible Stories for Blasphemers is the property of Dan Rogland and Mariah Wren and is served directly from their servers with no modification, redirects, or rehosting. The podcast is not affiliated with or endorsed by Podjoint in any way.
Happy upload day, blasphemers! This week we introduce Micah, one of the last judges! Also explore topics of idols, and live-in priests! And in this week's Pop Corner, camp counselor Dan tells us all about the pagan god Pan! Follow & DM us on Instagram @bs4blasphemers Send us an email at biblestoriesforblasphemers@gmail.com
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Comedy
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Religion & Spirituality,
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Episodes (20/64)
Bible Stories for Blasphemers
Idle Idols
Happy upload day, blasphemers!This week we introduce Micah, one of the last judges! Also explore topics of idols, and live-in priests! And in this week's Pop Corner, camp counselor Dan tells us all about the pagan god Pan!Special thanks to Henry Rogland for our intro, and to Bird Creek for our theme song, "Hooky With Sloane." Edited and Mixed by Everett Kemper (@everettkemper)Hosted by Dan Rogland & Mariah Wren (@mariahmaycats) Follow & DM us on Instagram @bs4blasphemersSend us a...
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11 months ago
56 minutes

Bible Stories for Blasphemers
Samson & Delilah
Howdy folks!An eye for an eye sure does make the whole world blind. And that proverb couldn't be proven more true than in this episode where Samson gets crossed and things get wild!Special thanks to Henry Rogland for our intro, and to Bird Creek for our theme song, "Hooky With Sloane." Edited and Mixed by Everett Kemper (@everettkemper)Hosted by Dan Rogland & Mariah Wren (@mariahmaycats) Follow & DM us on Instagram @bs4blasphemersSend us an email at biblestoriesforblasphemers@gmail.com
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12 months ago
1 hour 10 minutes

Bible Stories for Blasphemers
Out of the Eater Came Something to Eat
Hello, dear listeners!This week we introduce characters Samson and Delilah, get some child rearing advice from an angel, and see some Captain America level log (lion) ripping!Special thanks to Henry Rogland for our intro, and to Bird Creek for our theme song, "Hooky With Sloane." Edited and Mixed by Everett Kemper (@everettkemper)Hosted by Dan Rogland & Mariah Wren (@mariahmaycats) Follow & DM us on Instagram @bs4blasphemersSend us an email at biblestoriesforblasphemers@gmail.com
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1 year ago
1 hour 8 minutes

Bible Stories for Blasphemers
Lesbians Are Immortal
Hello blasphemers! In this episode we look into the life and times of another judge named Jephthah.And also come across what may be the bible's first gay character??Special thanks to Henry Rogland for our intro, and to Bird Creek for our theme song, "Hooky With Sloane." Edited and Mixed by Everett Kemper (@everettkemper)Hosted by Dan Rogland & Mariah Wren (@mariahmaycats) Follow & DM us on Instagram @bs4blasphemersSend us an email at biblestoriesforblasphemers@gmail.com
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1 year ago
53 minutes

Bible Stories for Blasphemers
Divine Right
Hello Blasphemers!Apologies for the late upload on this episode. The next episode will be up Wednesday 10/30 per the usual schedule.In this episode, we dive into Chapter 9 of the Book of Judges! Abimelech, son of Gideon, isn't so humble as his father, and craves power of his own. Will he attain it? Listen to find out!Also in this week's Pop Corner, it's all about Lord of the Rings, baby!Special thanks to Henry Rogland for our intro, and to Bird Creek for our theme song, "Hooky With Sloane." E...
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1 year ago
1 hour 19 minutes

Bible Stories for Blasphemers
March of the 300
Happy Episode Day, blasphemers!This week, Dan regales us the tale of Gideon's 300 and their pursuit of Zebah, Zalmunna and their 15,000 Midianites.Also in this week's Computer Room segment, Everett the Engineer talks with our hosts about the link between Neopets and the church of Scientology!Special thanks to Henry Rogland for our intro, and to Bird Creek for our theme song, "Hooky With Sloane." Edited and Mixed by Everett Kemper (@everettkemper)Hosted by Dan Rogland & Mariah Wren (@maria...
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1 year ago
57 minutes

Bible Stories for Blasphemers
An Army of Various Ites
Gather round Campers, 'cause your fave bible camp counselors are back! Dan managed to break his wrist just after recording this, so we had to take a short break, but now it's time to get back to REAL business: Bible. In this one we teach you survival skills you'll take with you for the rest of your life. Such as... the best methods in which to drink water from a river; How to terrify your enemies using the awesome sonic power of a bunch of trumpets; How to ensure God is Bread. This one's a MU...
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1 year ago
59 minutes

Bible Stories for Blasphemers
He Did the Dew
Dia duit, heathens! Camp Counselor Mariah is back from Ireland, so go ahead and help yourself to your favorite non-bigoted pickle chicken and settle in for another installment of The Bible! This week Dan teaches us about a Judge called Gideon. He’s a skeptic icon and almost certainly was the first guy to ever Science. You can’t prove he wasn’t. Then be sure to stick around for the second half of the show where we climb into the Travel Trailer and Mariah shares her time visiting some megalithi...
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1 year ago
54 minutes

Bible Stories for Blasphemers
Damn, Deborah.
*in the voice of Julie Andrews*Dearest Gentle Listener,Now, you didn't think we'd forgotten to maintain our ongoing commitment to providing you Patreon content content, did you? Well, worry not little lamb, your shepherds haven't forgotten you. In this episode you can look forward to such delights as thus, as well as the story of the only female judge in the Book of Judges. This is the story of Deborah, of course. Do not underestimate this gentlelady, for she and her bestie Jael deliver the f...
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1 year ago
54 minutes

Bible Stories for Blasphemers
Evil World Peace
Blessings upon all ye blasphemers, for we are back from summer vacation!!! This is one of the BEST Bible stories we've gotten to cover so far as we continue in the Book of Judges with the stories of Othniel, Ehud, and also Shamgar was there. Most of the time we focus on the story of Ehud and his diabolical scheming, and how he secures victory for Israel. In the pop corner we talk about the origins of the phrase 'familiarity breeds contempt', as well as the Antique Roadshow. And keep an ear ou...
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1 year ago
56 minutes

Bible Stories for Blasphemers
Dividing and also maybe Conquering
Happy Bible! We've finally said goodbye to Joshua and are entering our Biblical Folk Hero Era. With no successor named by Joshua, the nation of Israel continues on without a conduit to God. A generation has passed and it turns out God's not really popular anymore. And so God didn't take that well . He essentially sees Israel as though it is his adult son who just said that he's not going to go college... and also is hanging out with high school dropouts and starting an Only Fans. So, nat...
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1 year ago
1 hour 10 minutes

Bible Stories for Blasphemers
The Tortured Pastors Department
Welcome to church sweet flock! This week Youth Pastor Dan (YPD) tells us the story of Joshua again..but faster this time. Think of it like the notes someone gave you about the key takeaways of the reading assignment. There's some extra flavor that's added along the way, but this ep rounds off the Book of Joshua as he dies at the age of 110, naming no successor. Then in the Pop Corner, we visit the Music Room to gush about and dissect the newest Taylor Swift Album (The Tortured Poets Departmen...
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1 year ago
1 hour 10 minutes

Bible Stories for Blasphemers
A Christian Ensemble
Hello again to all our precious Blasphemers! This week we learn about a very interesting event that could only be explained by a divine act…. Sort of. Joshua commands the sun to stand still, which helps them while they save Gibeon (which they have to do because of their tricksy covenant.) Then after a short detour, we head back to the Music Room. Everett comes to the table with analysis of the lyrics written by the band Knocked Loose. Before you go, everyone say hi to Dan who will be su...
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1 year ago
57 minutes

Bible Stories for Blasphemers
On God
Happy Episode day, blasphemers!! This week Dan teaches us about how the Gibeonites made the diabolical choice to deceive the Israelites in order to secure their protection against being slaughtered… the audacity!!! After that, in the pop corner, our conversation resembles a bouncy ball set loose in a long linoleum hallway. Also some spoilers as we plan content for our forthcoming Patreon page which totally for sure definitely really is going to exist. Enjoy ;)Special thanks to Henry Rog...
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1 year ago
55 minutes

Bible Stories for Blasphemers
Stranger Among Them
Blessed hump day congregation! In this week’s installment of The Bible, our valiant heroes raze the city of Ai, leaving no survivors. They then immortalize its king forever in what can only be described as… gross. And then in the Pop Corner aka Music Room, in celebration of Dan’s many achievements, Mariah reads to him the lyrics of Dysphoria Hoodie by Laura Jane Grace.Special thanks to Henry Rogland for our intro, and to Bird Creek for our theme song, "Hooky With Sloane." Edited and Mixed by ...
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1 year ago
49 minutes

Bible Stories for Blasphemers
The Promised Land (God's Version)
Blessed Wednesday to all of God's monsters... but especially you, dear listener. We have an inspirational story in store for you this week. All about the conquest of the city of Ai, and also a quick detour to discuss the stoning of Achan. Doesn't that sound lovely? In the pop corner, Mariah and Dan gush about grammy winners and parasocial-besties of the pod, boygenius. And, of course, Mariah celebrates the new Taylor Swift album announcement. Go ahead and settle in and make yourself a hot bev...
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1 year ago
51 minutes

Bible Stories for Blasphemers
the Foreskin Awakens
And it came to pass that a new episode was released! Behold! We're back again this week with the second mass circumcision event of the Old Testament. Just before invading Jericho, Joshua realizes he and his army must NOT forget to get rid of that cumbersome foreskin. Plus - special guest appearance by A Man. Then, in the Pop Corner, we discuss the Veggie Tales episode titled "Josh and the Big Wall - A Lesson in Obedience", and the challenges of being a proverbs 31 woman. Special th...
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1 year ago
47 minutes

Bible Stories for Blasphemers
God Math - on Calvinism (feat. Henry Rogland)
This week instead of your regularly scheduled sermon, we have a Very Special Episode featuring the Disclaimer Voice himself… that’s right kids, we’ve got Henry Rogland in the pulpit this week!! Henry joins us to discuss his experience growing up in Calvinism, the concept of T.U.L.I.P., and the Classic Christian School education. Basically it’s a generous helping of shame, a delightful little acronym that appeals to the youth of today, and waaaay too much homework. This one’s a doo...
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1 year ago
2 hours 10 minutes

Bible Stories for Blasphemers
Folie á Deux
This week we dive into The Book of Joshua, involving Rahab's deal with the Israel spies sent to Jericho. More importantly, however, we provide our in depth analysis of the VeggieTales episode entitled Josh and The Big Wall: A Lesson in Obedience. Don't miss it. Special thanks to Henry Rogland for our intro, and to Bird Creek for our theme song, "Hooky With Sloane." Edited and Mixed by Everett Kemper (@everettkemper)Hosted by Dan Rogland & Mariah Wren (@mariahmaycats) Follow & DM ...
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1 year ago
56 minutes

Bible Stories for Blasphemers
Drunk With Blood
This week on Bible Stories for Blasphemers, it's... "Previously, in The Bible" in this Dragon Ball Z-esque pseudo-recap episode in which Dan recounts the Book of Deuteronomy. So grab your salt, get in your Impala, queue up "Carry On My Wayward Son", and join us. Also: Remember to send us your Scientology questions & strange religious encounters!Special thanks to Henry Rogland for our intro, and to Bird Creek for our theme song, "Hooky With Sloane." Edited and Mixed by Everett K...
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1 year ago
59 minutes

Bible Stories for Blasphemers
Happy upload day, blasphemers! This week we introduce Micah, one of the last judges! Also explore topics of idols, and live-in priests! And in this week's Pop Corner, camp counselor Dan tells us all about the pagan god Pan! Follow & DM us on Instagram @bs4blasphemers Send us an email at biblestoriesforblasphemers@gmail.com