Last episode of the year, it has been a heck of a journey, and we have a great one for you. I start with a personal story of letting go of unintentional connections and the difference between high standards and seeking perfection. I'll tell you why your situationship might seem okay, but how it might actually be blocking you from true love. Speaking of which, I then share a powerful conversation I had with two close guy friends, one recently engaged, and how hearing him talk about feeling inspired by his partner shifted something big for me (I think it will for you too). Finally, I then reflect on: “I’m single and healed… and now I don't want anyone." We will see about that! See you on the otherside.
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Don't tell me you love me if you want to keep me ... In this episode, I dive deep into how softness and avoidance go hand in hand. How everyone is a mirror and how our patterns keep replaying in dating without realizing it. I'll show you why you attract people who can’t fully meet you, why vulnerability feels risky even when it’s the thing we want most, and how the people we date end up reflecting the parts of ourselves we’re still avoiding.
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Isn’t it funny how the “prize” for being such a boss is you now take care of everything? In this episode, I get into what healthy masculine and feminine energy actually look like in real life: direction, stability, container vs. receptivity, amplification, flow. I'll discuss why so many strong, high-performing women end up stuck in their masculine without realizing it (and spoiler, it’s not because you’re “too much). I walk through an 8-year relationship story to show you how breadcrumbs work, how your identity gets tied to hope, and how mixed signals are just an avoidance of the truth.
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You call it chemistry, your nervous system calls it chaos. I cover a bunch of your situationship questions such as: how soon is too soon, how long is too long, when detachment feels impossible, toxic exs, divorce, empty I love yous, ghost sightings, and finally standing up. This isn't just about situationships, it's a masterclass in letting go of everything you thought you knew about who you are and stepping into the most authentic version of yourself. Today, you are done chasing to be chosen.
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Why do you step back when someone finally shows up? Why does safety feel like danger? I’m breaking down avoidance (specifically in women) and all the ways you self-sabotage when you meet a potential good connection. We also dig into the questions you sent in about the pressure surrounding social media in dating, from following Insta models to snooping through his following list. I also share my thoughts on watching p~rn in relationships.
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You're laid back, low maintenance, and you don't need much. The only issue is that you struggle with finding that balance of receiving the energy that you want. I'll talk about how to confidently communicate your feelings without losing your place. I will discuss why men pull away after months of consistency. If you're feeling like you're doing everything right but still not getting what you want, this is for you.
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Your ego is about to get rocked, for real. This episode is a deeper look at what ego actually is (which is generally misunderstood). I'll talk about the different ways it manifests in relationships, how your personality is shaped by it, and how to live beyond it (and/or how to make it stronger and healthier). This episode is a wake-up call for anyone who is still stuck holding onto someone they know is not right for them.
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Last week, I talked about how you need to challenge a man in order to get him to stay over the long haul. This week, I'll deep dive into what it truly means to be the woman he can't help but respect. I'll also provide you with another tool that you can use to generate instant confidence and build the life you want faster. Visualize what you want, embody the person you want to receive, and watch your world change.
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You know those phases in life where you’re torn between building your dream and building a life with someone? This episode gets deep down into how avoidance shows up in men, what they are actually thinking when they pull back, and why so many people are chasing achievement to fill a void they don’t even see. I also share a personal story of how I stood firm in my boundaries and truth with an avoidant. Today is a giant journey through my brain on the intersection of validation, success, and finding true love.
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Let’s take you through the mind of an avoidant, a self-aware one at that. I’ll discuss why getting the ick might be a form of unconscious self-sabotage, why our society craves fake love, and how to better regulate and communicate as an avoidant. If you ever catch yourself missing someone who is not choosing you, let me teach you how to change the narrative and start attracting people who are actually available.
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Did you really do too much? ... This week, we will start with why our nervous system pushes us into anxious spirals and overthinking. I'll then give you a powerful tool to combat your anxiety and show you how to stay calm when dating feels uncertain. I'll guide you on how to maintain your peace while meeting new people, especially if you struggle with limerance. I'll also touch on the invisible string theory and questions around whether dating standards have gotten out of control.
Work with me, sign up for the newsletter, or take the dating quiz: https://confidencechris.com/
Chapters:
02:58 Limerance & Regulating Your Anxiety
34:00 Invisible String Theory
39:19 Are Dating Standards Getting Out of Control
46:27 How to Date Without Losing Yourself
It's episode 100, wow what a journey! Today I am going to share the 3 most important mindset shifts I've discovered as a coach. Are you ready to release control, kill perfectionism, and know the steps to building true confidence? I'll also share a few recent dating stories from swallowing my pride, choosing love over fear, and a wild story about ghosting and ex lovers.
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Dating is supposed to feel good, not confusing, not dismissive, not anxious. This week I talk about situations where ghosting might actually be necessary and why I have zero tolerance for poor communication. I'll share a great self-reflection exercise that reveals what drives you, what you fear, and where you place your worth, which will help you identify your attachments. I also tackle questions about how to know if you are emotionally ready for a relationship, how to handle dating a dismissive avoidant, and if there is anything you can do to help them see their own worth.
Work with me, sign up for the newsletter, or take the dating quiz: https://confidencechris.com/
Chapters
00:00 Zero Tolerance Policy
18:04 Self-Reflection Exercise
29:01 Dating & Nicotine
42:41What Makes Someone Emotionally Ready
58:29 Dating a Dismissive Avoidant
Have you ever been infatuated and start acting crazy? Well, do I have a story for you! I talk about my pattern of doing too much and how I am learning to slow down and trust myself. We’ll get into how you subconsciously communicate your worth, why being “too nice” too soon can kill attraction, and what it actually looks like to show up grounded and calm instead of overselling. Plus, I answer a listener’s question about whether people really change, why we chase the same patterns even years later, and what to do if you’re struggling with intimacy in avoidant relationships.
Work with me, sign up for the newsletter, or take the dating quiz: https://confidencechris.com/
Chapters
00:00 Handling Infatuation & Communicating Your Value Better
36:39 Can They Actually Change?
48:16 Avoidant Went and Dated Someone Else After Breakup
52:33 Physical Intimacy Issues with Avoidants
I just got back from a ten-day trip to New York that completely pulled me out of my routine. No TikToks, no structure, just late nights, new people, and letting go of control. I share stories from the trip such as extending my flight last minute, getting ghosted after being real, and trusting that the right people and moments always show up when you stop forcing. This is about choosing love over fear, presence over control, and freedom over validation.
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Are they really the next best thing, or are they just like everyone else? Today I had a new voice note coaching client who came to me spiraling and overthinking about her potential new boo. He was throwing everything at her: masculine energy, plans, good vibes, and all of a sudden, everything shifted. She gave me permission to share her question live on the podcast as well as my response. In this episode, I'll talk about what to do when your nervous system goes into overdrive, how to handle the fear of being too much or ruining it before it even starts, and what happens when you sleep with someone quickly and the attachment spikes. Let me help you stay confident in your dating process and decisions.
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In today's episode, I am going to share with you my truest love and deepest fear. It's an exercise that I am going to share with you to help you get to the root of your more controlling beliefs. I'll talk about how these beliefs have played out in my relationships and why I’ve tied so much of my self-worth to attention. I get into the dark side of empathy, how being nice isn’t the same as being authentic, and why so many of the things we think we’re doing out of love are actually driven by fear. I share stories from clients navigating back to friendship when they used to include benefits. I'll discuss how to sit with and handle old traumas while dating or trying to find new partners. If you’ve ever felt invisible, overlooked, or not chosen, this is for you.
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Chapters
00:00 Empathy vs Fear
16:01 Deepest Fear vs Deepest Love Exercise
35:54 Single So Long Now You're Avoidant
42:54 Managing Triggers With Someone New
Some endings aren't meant to be rewritten. In this episode, I get into why it’s so tough to let go and why “spinning the block” usually leads to more chaos. I'll discuss how to find emotionally equipped partners, what it means when a man asks you to hang out but never follows through, and the harsh reality of why holding onto "what used to be" keeps you stuck. If you’ve ever needed the truth about whether that spark is real or just a trauma bond, you are about to get it.
Work with me, sign up for the newsletter, or take the dating quiz: https://confidencechris.com/
Chapters
00:00 Waiting For Commitment
25:33 When They Spin the Block
32:45 How to Find Someone Healed
41:47 “I Want to See You” But No Action
48:34 Intense Spark or Trauma Bond?
This week was a rollercoaster, dates, ghosting, old patterns showing up, and life testing tf out me. I follow up about the girl I went out with and how I still felt the energy was off, even though it looked good on paper. I'll give you guys a tool for how to digest a date, which will help you understand your experience. Then I get into a wild story about a four-hour FaceTime that went from “book a flight” to getting ghosted over lowercase letters. This episode is about slowing down, letting go of chasing attention, and learning how to handle rejection even when it's coming in bunches.
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Are you ready to face yourself head-on? Today, I’m breaking down the discomfort and self-doubt that come with being on your own: the second-guessing, the weekends that feel too quiet, and the moments you want to run back to them for comfort. I talk about early-stage dating anxiety, how your avoidance sneaks into both relationships and work, and why relying on someone to “save” you is the fastest way to lose yourself (and them). Plus, I answer a listener’s question on knowing when to walk away from an avoidant partner, especially when their words don’t match their actions.
Work with me, sign up for the newsletter, or take the dating quiz: https://confidencechris.com/