What'd you like? Send us a text. TALK: Holidays in Iowa City. Church merch. The Stonehenge gift shop. Druids. Walter’s sister buys him a whip. Cousins drop you on your head. SKETCHES: A really loud chef. The wagon full of swag. Short Attention Span Theater. Voicemails from God. And more.

What'd you like? Send us a text. TALK: Local newscaster’s dancing. The streaming Oscars. The first A.I. reality show. Weed trees. Anime. Losing our cable TV award. SKETCHES: The second best places for New Years Eve. Champaign made by ducks. Throwing produce at bicycles. Plus, more.

What'd you like? Send us a text. Merry Christmas Eve eve (for those who celebrate)!! TALK: The guys talk about buffs. The finer points of furries. Pipe-fitters vs actors. Pre-roasted chestnuts. And who’s bringing the inflatable rat? SKETCHES: Chipmunk pirates. Selfies with Santa. Forced family fun. And tattoos for the homeless. Plus, more.

What'd you like? Send us a text. TALK: A 4-year-old elevator operator. The Neil Diamond musical. Opening for Jonathon Brandmeier’s band. Animosity for Christmas. And prank kidnapping. SKETCHES: Holiday blacktop service. Baby shopping. Insurance for your blanket. A leftover restaurant. Plus, more.

What'd you like? Send us a text. Tacky Christmas singers. 8-tracks. Latvian actors. Weird ethnic holiday food. Walt and Tim open a really boring advent calendar. And Jim gets hit with a rock. Then: a commercial about Nothing. Hormonal underwear. Prescription cologne. And a song about the perils of an extended family Christmas. Plus more.

What'd you like? Send us a text. Pulled from the DLCHH archives: the guys remember that one summer they started a theater camp for kids. Or did they? It’s foggy. Maybe they got one or two of the details wrong. Maybe all of them? Then in the second segment the guys drink cocoa in their PJs and discuss the upcoming Christmas holiday. And Tim tells us about his pet possum.

What'd you like? Send us a text. Frats without liquor. The good ol’ days of smoking. Jim almost burns down a forest. The penny’s last days. Truth about pilgrims. And Tim’s mic trouble. Then sketches: Horoscope for stud muffins. The first Thanksgiving, probably. Louisiana, whether you like it or not. And of course, football. Plus more…

What'd you like? Send us a text. Walt’s dad’s porn books. A.I. country music. The upside of participation trophies. Then sketches: Stupidity. An explosive new bath soap. Mr. Analogy. And pumpkin spice in EVERYTHING. Plus, more…

What'd you like? Send us a text. Tim love for Veteran’s Day. War movies. Jim’s toenail update. And Walter’s drunken bachelor party with his dad. Then: Hollywood’s oldest toddler. The upside of infidelity. A really, really nice talk show. Plus more!

What'd you like? Send us a text. Tim thought The Black Phone was cute. Hair transplant fails. Getting your dog drunk. And that time they rubbed radium on Walt’s head. PLUS: Bras have a birthday. Custom condoms. Military movie posers. And what’s happening at the Mall.

What'd you like? Send us a text. Self defense with a banana. Something gross fell off Jim. Walt's over-amorous family dog. And an A.I. search engine suggests new names for the pod. Then: a sale on Halloween delinquent supplies. An unexpected hitchhiker. A conversation with a receding hairline. A scary boy loves his parents. Plus more!

What'd you like? Send us a text. Climbing Mt Everest ain’t what it used to be. Bill Belichick’s new squeeze. Jim cleans his place for the TV guys. Walt’s one day job as a baby photographer. THEN: Halloween bargains. Fall fun at a strawberry farm. Breakfast for dinner. And a detective who can straighten your spine.

What'd you like? Send us a text. We are back!! Whoo! Hoo! We took a little break but now we’re back at it this week. We talk about the surgeries we got while we were out, a weekend by the lake, and Jim’s new on-line Master's degree. Then Tim recounts his rearend’s run-in with a yellow jacket and, of course, soup for cats… Then Edie, the Breakfast Fairy introduces us to her new smokable friend, a word that sounds dirty but isn’t, and a porta potty from space.

What'd you like? Send us a text. Yeah, we know… We’re still kickin’ back. One last replay show. Promise. This one has Jim telling us how he tried to make gun powder when he was a kid (and failed). Then an Olympic skier gets frostbite on his weewee!

What'd you like? Send us a text. In this week’s flashback, the Duck Logic guys talk about the start of the all-body, “butt deodorant” craze and how Walter swam naked in high school gym class. Then Jim wears googly eyes and we talk about Bob Dylan.

What'd you like? Send us a text. We’re still on break, sorry. Just gettin’ back from 3 days of fresh air, liquor, and videos games… You? You get a flashback to the show where we improvised a fuzzy memory of the children’s TV show we did (or didn’t do) in a “Fowl Memory” extended cut segment.

What'd you like? Send us a text. The guys are taking a break so they’re sending along a few “best of” talkie bits from previous shows for your enjoyment. Walt tells us about his “meat detective” dream. Then they remember the musical they did (or didn’t do) based on their cable TV show. Or not. It’s fuzzy. It might’ve happened. Probably not.

What'd you like? Send us a text. Okay, we seriously needed a break so we’re dropping a “best of” from the archives--- That time we uncovered the truth behind Amelia Earhart’s disappearance and how there was someone with her on the plane! That time we did a show with a young Andy Dick. And then a church on TV calls their viewers “shut-ins.”

What'd you like? Send us a text. The Duck Logic guys are taking a much-needed break but didn’t wanna leave their loyal listeners hangin’, so here’s a little replay from the archives--- That time they talked about the pharma commercial with a cure for “crooked carrot” disease and Jim gettin’ lucky with a girl on the kitchen floor. Enjoy!

What'd you like? Send us a text. TALK: Living in an empty Hobby Lobby. A used pornography store. Betty Page. Elvis movies for the 21st century. And we question Jim’s “friendship” with the kids in his neighborhood. SKETCHES: Canadian Labor Day. Larry David meets Zendaya. Kenny has a bonfire. Our audio centerfold. And a newsman tells a joke. Plus a few more things.