ExcommuniDate: Life & Love After Religion

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ExcommuniDate: Life & Love After Religion

ExcommuniDate

27 episodes

3 weeks ago

In this year-end recap episode, hosts Austin, Jessa, and producer Miguel pull back the curtain on their first year of podcasting. They share technical disasters (internet outages, mic mishaps, Rubik's cube fidgeting), administrative fails (the "draft" title incident), and lessons learned about audience engagement. Topics include: controversial TikTok comments about Snapchat culture, the importance of guest vetting (enter the "Laz test"), surprising insights from reality TV coverage, and why M...

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Religion & Spirituality,

Society & Culture,

Health & Fitness,

All content for ExcommuniDate: Life & Love After Religion is the property of ExcommuniDate and is served directly from their servers with no modification, redirects, or rehosting. The podcast is not affiliated with or endorsed by Podjoint in any way.

In this year-end recap episode, hosts Austin, Jessa, and producer Miguel pull back the curtain on their first year of podcasting. They share technical disasters (internet outages, mic mishaps, Rubik's cube fidgeting), administrative fails (the "draft" title incident), and lessons learned about audience engagement. Topics include: controversial TikTok comments about Snapchat culture, the importance of guest vetting (enter the "Laz test"), surprising insights from reality TV coverage, and why M...

Show more...

Religion & Spirituality,

Society & Culture,

Health & Fitness,

Episodes (20/27)

ExcommuniDate: Life & Love After Religion

24. 2025 Recap: Lessons, Fails, and What's Next

In this year-end recap episode, hosts Austin, Jessa, and producer Miguel pull back the curtain on their first year of podcasting. They share technical disasters (internet outages, mic mishaps, Rubik's cube fidgeting), administrative fails (the "draft" title incident), and lessons learned about audience engagement. Topics include: controversial TikTok comments about Snapchat culture, the importance of guest vetting (enter the "Laz test"), surprising insights from reality TV coverage, and why M...

3 weeks ago

42 minutes

ExcommuniDate: Life & Love After Religion

23. Bible PTSD, Chaos Magic & The Funniest Faith Crisis You’ve Ever Heard

Jack Violently joins Jessa, Austin, and Miguel to share his story of growing up evangelical, slowly losing faith, and figuring out who he is without religion’s script. He opens up about church trauma, purity culture, the fear of questioning doctrine, and the strange freedom that comes after belief collapses. With humor and honesty, they talk about identity, morality outside religion, friendship after deconstruction, and why humor can be a survival tool when everything you believed falls apart...

1 month ago

53 minutes

ExcommuniDate: Life & Love After Religion

23. The Ick Index: Scoring Red Flags

In this play-along episode, we put modern dating under a microscope. Hosts Austin, Jessa, and guest Laz share their biggest dating gripes, then score them as icks or red flags from 1 to 5. Topics include: baby-talk sign-offs ("bye-bye now"), the "females" label, texting vs. IRL tone, food etiquette (string cheese, wings, sharing plates), tipping culture, flag-waving patriot games, and barefoot TSA lines. Expect humor, honest takes, and practical cues for better communication, boundaries, and ...

1 month ago

1 hour 11 minutes

ExcommuniDate: Life & Love After Religion

22. Raised for the Rapture

What happens when you're raised to believe the world is always ending? Violinist Amber Dobbs unpacks her childhood in The Message, a Pentecostal cult led by prophet William Branham. From apocalyptic fear to shame-based control, Amber shares how she escaped the Branhamites and began deconstructing her faith. Learn to identify brainwashing tactics, understand high control religions, and hear Amber's empowering message of self-validation. Essential listening for anyone navigating religious traum...

2 months ago

1 hour 5 minutes

ExcommuniDate: Life & Love After Religion

21. From Faith to Fiction: A Story of Love, Horror and Deconstruction

What happens when the faith you’ve built your life around becomes the very thing that breaks it apart? In this episode, Jessa and Austin sit down with Rip and Steph Graven to explore their journey from leading ministry to walking away from the church they were asked to help create in the Bay Area. Rip and Steph open up about the heartbreak of spiritual disillusionment, the strain it placed on their marriage and community, and what it means to lose your faith in public. From late-night doubts ...

2 months ago

1 hour 6 minutes

ExcommuniDate: Life & Love After Religion

20. Sinners vs. Saints | Secret Lives of Mormon Wives Episode 3 Recap

The MomTok divide crystallizes when Jen and Zach uninvite Jesse, Demi, Layla, and Taylor from their baby blessing, separating the "good Mormons" from everyone else. Whitney's poor taste fruity pebbles gift to Demi at Galentine's Day only deepens the rift. From hot-tub tension to Galentine's shade, Austin and Jessalynn dissect the friendship politics, calling out emotional maturity gaps, judgment around sexuality, and how beauty standards collide with religious rules. We examine Utah soda cult...

3 months ago

1 hour 10 minutes

ExcommuniDate: Life & Love After Religion

19. Blindly Following to Love is Blind: Amber Wilder's Journey

Love is Blind's Amber Wilder opens up about her journey from homeschool and high-control Southern Baptist upbringing to religious deconstruction and finding love after leaving faith. We trace her path through purity culture, patriarchy, early marriages, and the quarter-life crisis that led to therapy and a complete life reset. Amber shares raw insights about religious trauma, family boundaries, spiritual but not religious beliefs, and breaking free from the 'church umbrella.' Plus: why she go...

3 months ago

1 hour 6 minutes

ExcommuniDate: Life & Love After Religion

18. My Mom, My Hero, My Exit from Faith

Who is Miguel? We finally sit down with the man behind the chair. Miguel shares his story of growing up in a deeply religious Protestant household in Puerto Rico, the betrayal that shattered his trust, and the slow, sometimes painful process of deconstructing his faith. We talk about cultural shock in the Midwest, finding family through friendships, navigating dating with a religious past, and keeping a strong bond with his devout mother despite their different beliefs. Honest, funny, and hea...

3 months ago

58 minutes

ExcommuniDate: Life & Love After Religion

17. When the Bible Belt Gets Too Tight: Leaving the Southern Baptist Church

What happens when church rules and family expectations squeeze too tight? You either suffocate—or break free. In this episode, Austin Schoen (aka the cooler, younger Austin, now with Bluetooth) shares his story of leaving the Southern Baptist church and navigating life after faith. From purity culture shame to cognitive dissonance, family fallout, and therapy breakthroughs, Austin opens up about the challenges of religious guilt and the healing power of unconditional love. With the supp...

4 months ago

51 minutes

ExcommuniDate: Life & Love After Religion

16. Book of Mormon Says No Orgasms!? | Secret Lives of Mormon Wives Episode 2 Recap

Drama, guilt, and vibrators… oh my! In this Secret Lives of Mormon Wives Episode 2 recap, Jessa and Austin spill the Utah tea on Taylor’s post-arrest pregnancy, toxic relationships, and a brewing alpha female feud with Whitney. We break down the MomTok branding battles, the vibrator deal that shook the group, and how Mormon culture fuels sexual shame and relationship guilt. From Book of Mormon purity rules to messy baby showers, we unpack the family drama, cultural double standards, and reali...

4 months ago

50 minutes

ExcommuniDate: Life & Love After Religion

15. Losing Religion, Finding Purpose: A Veteran’s Deconstruction Story

Marine vet Lazaro Facio shares his journey from Catholicism to atheism, exploring morality, family, and life after leaving religion. We sit down with Lazaro Facio who is a Marine Corps veteran, proud atheist, and member of the ExcommuniDate team as we talk about losing religion and rebuilding identity. Laz shares his story of growing up Catholic, navigating teenage parenthood, finding community in the military, and ultimately deconstructing his faith. We explore what morality looks like...

5 months ago

57 minutes

ExcommuniDate: Life & Love After Religion

14. They all Look the Same | Secret Lives of Mormon Wives Episode 1 Recap

Austin and Jessa dive headfirst into the world of reality TV, starting with Secret Lives of Mormon Wives, where the scandals are messy and the friendships are paper-thin. We break down the Taylor Frankie Paul soft swinging scandal, viral TikTok drama, and the beauty standards running wild in Mormon culture. We also get real about deeper topics like domestic violence, social media pressure, and how patriarchal rules play out in both the church and Utah’s law enforcement. A recap of Hulu's Secr...

5 months ago

1 hour 1 minute

ExcommuniDate: Life & Love After Religion

13. The Illusion of Free Will: Choice Manipulation and Its Consequences

Do we truly have free will, or are our choices carefully shaped by the systems around us? Austin and Jessa unpack how high demand religions manipulate choice, creating the illusion of agency. They explore how shame, guilt, cultural norms, and community pressure shape decision-making. They examine the emotional costs of belonging, the subtle difference between emotional coercion and external control, and the journey of learning to trust yourself again. This episode invites you to question your...

6 months ago

50 minutes

ExcommuniDate: Life & Love After Religion

12. Utah, But Secular... Culturally Mormon?

Jessa grew up Mormon in Utah. Nikki grew up not Mormon in Utah. Austin didn’t grow up in Utah at all. Together, they unpack what it means to come of age in a place steeped in LDS culture. From navigating ward culture and family expectations to dating and parenting in a highly religious environment, this episode explores how location, belief, and identity collide in unexpected ways. Follow us on: Patreon | YouTube | Instagram | TikTok | Facebook Support the show

6 months ago

1 hour 7 minutes

ExcommuniDate: Life & Love After Religion

11. Red Flag Showdown: Dealbreakers Debated & Rated

Jessa and Austin go head-to-head in a red flag showdown, sharing and scoring each others red flags by their level of red flagginess. From phone addiction and food snobbery to plastic surgery takes and hobby obsessions, nothing is off-limits. They break down which red flags are legit dealbreakers and which are just personal icks. Who brought the biggest red flag? Stick around to find out who wins. Follow us on: Patreon | YouTube | Instagram | TikTok | Facebook Support the show

7 months ago

51 minutes

ExcommuniDate: Life & Love After Religion

10. The Hidden Struggles of a Jehovah's Witness Pioneer

A former Jehovah’s Witness pioneer joins us to share her story of leaving the faith. She opens up about the exhausting demands of life as a pioneer, the emotional cost of door-to-door evangelism, and the trauma of being part of a system that mishandles abuse and enforces shunning. We also explore her experience navigating dating and family expectations after leaving the faith, how other religions like Mormonism approach growth, and what it means to reclaim your identity. Patreon 👉 https...

7 months ago

1 hour

ExcommuniDate: Life & Love After Religion

9. Hindu Culture, Caste, and Interfaith Marriage

Leave your shoes – and sanctity – at the door and join us for this conversation with Vishakha (Vi), who grew up in India and moved to the United States at age 19. Raised in Hindu traditions, she talks about what happens when religion and culture intermingle, especially on the journey to love. We explore how societal and gender roles engrained in her Hindu upbringing impacted her biracial, interfaith relationship, wedding and – ultimately – divorce. Plus, we dig into the caste system, the conc...

7 months ago

1 hour 4 minutes

ExcommuniDate: Life & Love After Religion

8. From Catholic Roots to Personal Truth: Navigating Family and Faith

How can you show up in your family relationships when you’re not able to express your truest self? That’s exactly the question we explore in this episode. We’re joined by Bianca, who opted out of some core beliefs of her Catholic upbringing as a young adult, leaving behind a rift in her family relationships. She talks about balancing faith and science, finding love outside of her religion and the uninvited guest at the family dinner table: Catholic guilt. Her journey is a relatable one about ...

8 months ago

57 minutes

ExcommuniDate: Life & Love After Religion

7. From Purity to Power: Breaking Free from Christian Shame

On this episode, Melissa Frey joins the show to share her firsthand experience with the Christian church and its chase for chastity, especially in young women. She talks about the overwhelming guilt she felt when she had sex before marriage, casting off the patriarchal purity culture indoctrinated in her by faith and family. It was a decision that cost her dearly, but taught her valuable lessons about how the ideas of purity – common in high-demand religions – can hold us back. From the holy ...

8 months ago

49 minutes

ExcommuniDate: Life & Love After Religion

6. Grief, Queer Identity, and Art Therapy ft. Caitlin Torres Graham

Caitlin Torres Graham regularly works with people who are grieving, whether that’s coming out, loss, death or, you guessed it, leaving a high-demand religion. As a trauma-informed art therapist, Caitlin works particularly with those grappling with their queer identity for the first time. Leaving behind a conservative religion has a lot of parallels and can leave behind a lot of trauma and fear. On this episode, Caitlin joins the show to talk about how art expression can be a tool to go ...

9 months ago

54 minutes