In this episode, Laurie and George explore a pattern they see often in therapy but rarely hear women talk about openly: growing up under-touched—not abused or mistreated, but raised with too little warm, affectionate contact. Many girls learn early to be “little adults,” self-reliant and emotionally contained, with parents who provided care but not soothing. Inside, they adapt by dialing down their need for touch and connection. As adults, these women often struggle with desire, sensuality, and responsiveness—not because they’re broken, but because their bodies never learned that touch is comforting, safe, or connecting.
Laurie shares her clinical insight that erotic shutdown can be a predictable outcome of emotional neglect and under-stimulation, especially for women who are socialized to mute their physical needs. George joins her in mapping how attachment deactivation, low interoceptive awareness, and a lifetime of caregiving roles shape many women’s sexual experiences. Together they offer hope and clarity: with attuned affection, emotional safety, and pressure-free touch, the erotic body can awaken. Desire isn’t missing—it’s been waiting for the right conditions to flourish.
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