Though Nixon knows she's not at her best right now, she figures something is better than nothing. Enjoy an unplanned special where Nixon barely holds on to the concept of the podcast but makes an effort.

As Nixon is experiencing a self proclaimed Upward Spiral, she decides to go in depth on her journey to maximum confidence. Entailing her decision to quit her full time job and how she's going through an awakening, probably a spiritual one.

In a moment of desperation, an introduction is made. As she brainstormed many first episode topics, life reared it's atrocious head and the topic became clear. Join Nixon as she, in real time, copes with her suicidal thoughts and anguish derived from revelations and theories. Viewer discretion is advised.