Someone who once attended a meditation class I taught called my work AI slop.I didn’t argue. I saved it.This episode isn’t a defense of artificial intelligence, and it isn’t a productivity flex. It’s an honest look at how I actually think and write — through handwritten chaos, half-formed ideas, panic, mysticism, coffee spills, and a process that looks nothing like efficiency.Sometimes that process includes a machine.Not to generate thoughts for me, but to reflect them back — faster, clearer, and occasionally in ways that force me to confront what I actually mean.Not magic. Just legibility. My confusion spell-checked. My chaos folded into something readable.Every tool that ever made expression easier was accused of being impure.The typewriter. The word processor. Editors. Spellcheck. This one is no different. What people often react to isn’t automation — it’s the removal of visible suffering. We don’t trust clarity unless we can see the sweat.When I use AI, it doesn’t erase my thinking. It challenges it. Sometimes it misunderstands me beautifully. Sometimes it saves me from my own over-philosophizing. Sometimes it just sits there while I fall apart mid-sentence — which, honestly, is what most good editors do.The madness is mine.The coherence is shared.And no — this isn’t an AI voice.Just human emotion, divine confusion, one very judgmental cup of coffee, and a machine that politely declined to take credit.
Oh and here's the link to the blog post this was inspired by :
Source Code: A Standing Note on AI Use in 2025 | Zak El Fassi | Systems Engineering for the Agentic AI AgeIf this resonates and you want a quieter place to keep thinking together, you’re welcome to join the community or explore more work here:🔗 Discord: https://discord.gg/dXKjhZrZmM🔗 Website: https://idiotmystic.comNo pressure. Just presence.---AUDIOI Don't See the Branches, I See the Leaves by Chris Zabriskie is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 license. https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/Source: http://chriszabriskie.com/dtv/Artist: http://chriszabriskie.com/
Meditation is often framed as relaxation or spirituality.This episode looks at it as training.Across sports, military, academia, creative fields, and business, high performers are using meditation, breathwork, and visualization to improve measurable outcomes — faster reaction times, greater endurance, better decisions under pressure, stronger focus, emotional regulation, and improved recovery and sleep.This is an evidence-based overview of how meditation is being applied in high-stakes environments where performance matters.We cover research findings, real-world case studies, and the specific techniques most commonly used — from mindfulness and focused attention, to breathwork, visualization, and recovery-focused practices.The goal here isn’t to mystify meditation or oversell it. It’s to show, plainly, why people who rely on their minds under pressure are treating mental training with the same seriousness as physical training.If you’re skeptical but curious, this episode is for you.Citations and studies referenced in this episode are linked in the accompanying blog post.https://idiotmystic.com/f/how-meditation-boosts-performance-for-athletes-soldiers-ceos----Almost in F - Tranquillity by Kevin MacLeod is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 license. https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/Source: http://incompetech.com/music/royalty-free/index.html?isrc=USUAN1100394Artist: http://incompetech.com/
Most people treat resistance like a problem to eliminate.
What if it’s the training ground instead?
This episode explores what happens when the thing blocking you isn’t failure — it’s feedback.
When the friction that keeps returning isn’t a sign to quit, but a signal shaping a capacity you don’t have yet.
I talk about resistance as a kind of gym. About learning to hold recurring difficulty without flinching. About why smooth paths rarely build anything durable.
There’s also a quiet conversation here about attention — the kind that doesn’t announce itself.
The screenshots.
The private messages.
The readers and listeners who never engage publicly but carry the work into safer rooms.
Silence isn’t always absence.
Sometimes it’s encrypted traffic.
We touch on contrarian questions, not as hot takes, but as operating systems.
The kind that bend paths, get you uninvited, and help map where the real voltage is in a creative network.
This is also about building in imperfect conditions.
Writing in chaos.
Recording wherever you are.
Publishing open instead of waiting for control.
Letting systems learn instead of trying to pose as finished.
If you’re creating, thinking, or building anything that feels slow, quiet, or unseen — this episode is for you.
Treat resistance like a coach, not a cop.
Trust the quiet audience.
Ask the sideways question.
Choose meaning over control.
That’s the practice.
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Undercover Vampire Policeman by Chris Zabriskie is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 license. https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/
Source: http://chriszabriskie.com/uvp/
Artist: http://chriszabriskie.com/
There’s something quietly sacred about a gym at the edges of the day.The repetition. The iron. The breath. The discipline.This episode looks at fitness not as aesthetics or optimization, but as ritual — a modern devotional practice where repetition, effort, and exhaustion become a form of embodied meditation.For some people, training isn’t about looking good. It’s about devotion, control, and transformation. The gym becomes a temple. The weights become prayer beads. Each rep becomes a mantra. There’s a moment when effort stops feeling like effort and turns into something else — a trance, a stillness, a merging of body and will.We talk about why discipline works better than motivation, how repetition reshapes the nervous system, and why monks, mystics, and athletes all seem to understand the same thing: freedom comes from meeting your limits, not avoiding them.This isn’t about escaping the body.It’s about listening to it.If you’re lifting weights, rebuilding your life, studying, healing, or just trying to show up consistently to anything that matters, this episode is an invitation to see your practice differently.You don’t need perfection.You don’t need enlightenment.You need consistency.Whatever you practice becomes your prayer.---CGI Snake by Chris Zabriskie is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 license. https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/Source: http://chriszabriskie.com/divider/Artist: http://chriszabriskie.com/
Manifestation is usually sold as a technique.
Affirm. Visualize. Receive.
But what if that’s not what’s really happening?
In this tiny episode, I explore manifestation as something older and more human — not a cosmic hack, but a form of storytelling.
Long before vision boards and affirmations, people imagined futures as a way to survive. They wrote themselves into possibility before they ever believed it was guaranteed.
This isn’t about “thinking positive.”
It’s about character arcs.
Most manifestation scripts aren’t actually about outcomes — they’re about the version of you who can live inside them.
The confident one. The protected one. The one who feels safe enough to want.
We talk about why manifestation fails when you’re overwhelmed, how the nervous system edits your desires before you do, and why some imagined futures aren’t wishes at all — they’re repairs.
From a psychological lens, fantasy isn’t delusion. It’s the psyche finishing a sentence it never got to complete.
This episode reframes manifestation as collaboration, not control. You don’t command reality — you invite it.
You write the scene, the world shifts slightly, and somewhere in between, a future begins to form.
If you’ve ever felt blocked, embarrassed by desire, or unsure how to imagine a life that feels bigger than your current one, this is for you.
It is not childish to want.
It is not foolish to imagine.
It is holy.
---
Clean Soul - Calming by Kevin MacLeod is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 license. https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/
Source: http://incompetech.com/music/royalty-free/index.html?isrc=USUAN1300033
Artist: http://incompetech.com/
Most people say they watch horror movies to feel scared.
I don’t think that’s the real reason we keep coming back.
In this episode, I explore horror not as entertainment, but as ritual — a modern version of the ancient fires where humans once gathered to face monsters together.
Fear, when contained and witnessed, becomes something else.
Something communal.
Something clarifying.
Something strangely sacred.
We talk about why exorcism scenes make people cry, why horror is deeply physical, and why the nervous system experiences these films as a complete somatic arc — tension, terror, release, and quiet.
The same arc found in ancient worship, trance rituals, and communal rites across cultures.
Ghosts as grief.
Demons as shadow.
Zombies as numbness.
Not metaphors to explain horror away — but archetypes with teeth.
Horror movies give the psyche a stage to confront what it usually avoids.
They allow fear to move, complete itself, and be shared.
And when fear is shared, it binds people. It softens the world afterward. It returns us to ourselves, slightly lighter, slightly more awake.
This is not about believing in monsters.
It’s about recognizing the ritual.
The lights go down.
The body trembles.
The breath steadies.
And when it’s over, something inside you has been acknowledged — not fixed, not cured, just seen.
That’s why horror feels holy.
Even if we don’t have language for it anymore.
---
AUDIO
The Theatrical Poster for Poltergeist III by Chris Zabriskie is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution 4.0 license. https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/
Source: http://chriszabriskie.com/vendaface/
Artist: http://chriszabriskie.com/
Hi again.
Yes, it’s another hour-long video.
No, I’m not sorry about it.
This one is simple on purpose.
Just birds, wind, leaves doing their thing, water minding its business. No dramatic crescendos.
No “you are now entering a portal” energy.
Just the kind of sounds that remind your nervous system it doesn’t have to be on high alert all the time.
Long before playlists and apps and productivity hacks, people paid attention to this stuff naturally.
Not to optimize anything.
Just to sit, listen, and feel less alone in their own head. Nature didn’t need to convince anyone it was healing.
It just was.
This hour of natural soundscape is here if you need a place to land.
To study without silence feeling too loud.
To nap without your thoughts turning into a meeting.
To meditate without trying to achieve anything impressive.
There’s solid research showing that natural sounds can help regulate stress hormones, stabilize mood, and support focus by giving the brain something gentle and predictable to rest against.
But honestly, you don’t need a study to know that birds don’t yell at you or demand immediate responses.
That alone helps.
If you’re listening while resting or meditating, try this:
Breathe in slowly through your nose.
Let the exhale take a little longer than the inhale.
No counting required.
Just let the breath stretch itself out.
You don’t need to “do” anything while this plays.
Let it be background.
Let it be foreground.
Let it be something you forget is even on until you realize you feel a bit softer than before.
🌿 Possible Side Effects (your mileage may vary):
Less tension in places you forgot you were holding
Easier focus without forcing it
Better naps
A strange urge to go outside later
🎧 Tip from someone who overthinks audio: Headphones help. Looping is optional. One hour of birds is either perfect or slightly unhinged, depending on the day.
If you want to talk, wander, or sit quietly with other thoughtful weirdos, you’re welcome on the Discord:
https://discord.gg/dXKjhZrZmM
Or you can explore things at your own pace over at:
www.idiotmystic.com
No pressure.
Just sound.
For decades, the phrase “conspiracy theory” has been used to shut down conversations, discredit questions, and make curiosity feel dangerous.But history tells a quieter, more uncomfortable story.This is a one-hour talk about conspiracy theories that didn’t stay theories — programs, experiments, and operations that were once mocked, denied, or dismissed, and later confirmed through declassified documents, congressional hearings, court cases, and official admissions.From MK-Ultra and Tuskegee, to COINTELPRO, false flags, surveillance programs, corporate crimes, and media manipulation, this episode isn’t about speculation or internet mythology. It’s about patterns — how power behaves when it assumes no one is watching, and how the word “crazy” has often been used to delay accountability.There’s no music here. No hype. Just a slow ( sometimes painfully ), deliberate walk through documented history, meant to be listened to — not rushed.Skepticism is healthy. Blind trust isn’t.This is Conspiracy Theory 101.Join the Idiot Mystic Discord
A space for thoughtful discussion, curiosity, and conversation — not noise...except sometimes. We're human after all.https://discord.gg/dXKjhZrZmMVisit the website
Essays, projects, and future episodes:https://idiotmystic.com
It’s easy to love when love is light — flirty, brief, transactional, and safe.
But real love doesn’t stay there.
It asks you to remain present.
To be seen.
To dismantle the walls that once protected you and discover what they were hiding.
In this episode, I talk about loving deeply in a world trained to skim the surface.
About why depth is mistaken for intensity, why softness is framed as weakness, and why many people pull away not because they don’t want love — but because love demands honesty.
This isn’t a lesson about attachment or romance.
It’s about presence.
Discernment.
And the quiet discipline it takes to keep your heart open without losing yourself.
Loving deeply may break you — but it also rebuilds you softer, clearer, and more rooted in what matters.
Not everyone will meet you there.
That doesn’t mean you’re wrong for going.
If this resonates and you want a quieter place to continue the conversation, you’re welcome to join the community or explore more work here:
🔗 Discord: https://discord.gg/dXKjhZrZmM
🔗 Website: https://idiotmystic.com
No pressure.
Just presence.
And a lot of love.
There are moments the body doesn’t believe are over.Years pass. Life moves forward. But part of you stays trapped in a single scene — not because you’re weak, not because you won’t let go, but because the nervous system marked that moment as unfinished.Trauma isn’t just the event.It’s the loop.In this tiny episode, I try to explore how traumatic memories fracture time, why triggers feel like teleportation, and why the body keeps replaying moments it couldn’t fully survive the first time. This isn’t about logic or willpower. It’s more about how healing actually happens — through presence, ritual, and restoring a sense of safety in the now.Loops don’t just break because you defeat them.They soften when the body learns the sentence has ended.Not erasing the past — but widening the present until it no longer dominates it.If this resonates and you want a quieter place to continue the conversation, you’re welcome to join the community or explore more "work" here:🔗 Discord: https://discord.gg/dXKjhZrZmM🔗 Website: https://idiotmystic.comNo pressure. Just presence.And maybe a little crazy.
This episode is a reflection on failure—not the inspirational kind, but the awkward, embarrassing, burned-poptart kind.
The missed recordings.
The broken uploads.
The ideas that were supposed to work and didn’t.
The moments where you realize you forgot to hit record and the silence feels louder than anything you could’ve said.
I talk about failing in creative work, relationships, expectations, and even basic competence, and why failure has started to feel more trustworthy than success.
Success is polished.
Failure is honest. It leaves artifacts behind—old videos, half-finished projects, strange little breadcrumbs that prove you were here, trying.
There’s something oddly intimate about failing in public. It strips away performance and makes room for connection.
People don’t always bond over victories, but they recognize the sound of someone fumbling honestly and continuing anyway.
I don’t have answers here—just experiments, metaphors, and a growing sense that failure isn’t the enemy. It’s punctuation. The pauses that make the whole thing sing.
For more writing and reflections, visit IdiotMystic.com.
If you want to join the conversation or sit with others figuring it out as they go, you’re welcome on Discord:https://discord.gg/dXKjhZrZmM
This episode explores the subtle but life-changing difference between being desired and being understood.
Attention can feel like sunlight—warm and affirming—but it doesn’t always touch the places that ache for recognition.
We talk about the spiritual loneliness of being praised for the mask instead of the face, admired for your strength while your soul is quietly unraveling.
If you’ve ever confused desire with intimacy, or felt unseen inside relationships that looked perfect from the outside, this reflection might feel like exhaling.
For more writing and longer reflections, visit www.idiotmystic.com.
And if you'd like to share your own story or find community, join the Discord:
https://discord.gg/dXKjhZrZmM
This episode explores the quiet split so many people carry—the self you present to stay loved, and the self you protect to stay safe.
It’s inspired by years of listening to women describe the ache of being seen but not truly known, and by recognizing that same fracture within myself.
We talk about what happens when your depth becomes something you tuck away, when your inner world turns into a secret language, and how wholeness begins the moment your hidden self is finally welcomed back home.
If you'd like to read more writing in this style, visit www.idiotmystic.com.
To join the conversation and connect with others on the path, you’re welcome in the Discord community:
https://discord.gg/dXKjhZrZmM
I’ve spent my life around every kind of man — fighters, bouncers, soldiers, contractors, fathers, sons, the honorable and the unhinged. I’ve seen what real masculinity looks like… and what the counterfeit version becomes when it festers.
This episode is about the difference.
Not the internet version of “masculinity.”
Not the shallow, aggressive, insecure performance we’ve all seen.
But the quiet, steady, grounded kind — the kind born from pain, responsibility, compassion, and actual strength.
I talk about the men who raised me, the men I fought beside, the men I feared becoming, and the men who showed me what true masculine energy really is:
gentle, stable, protective, conscious, brave, and capable of restraint.
And I talk about the other kind — the wounded masculine that lashes out at women, children, strangers, and anyone weaker.
The masculinity that mistakes fear for power, ego for identity, aggression for leadership.
If you’re a man trying to figure out who you are…
If you’ve been hurt by men…
If you’re raising a son…
If you’re trying to break a cycle…
This episode is for you.
Because masculinity isn’t supposed to be a wound you carry.
It’s supposed to be a force that protects life — not destroys it.
And the moment you understand the difference, you start becoming the man you were always meant to be.
I understand this might not be everyone's cup of tea...but nothing is everyone's cup of tea. Some people don't even like breathing.
I spent a year, actually more ( but that's another story ) driving rideshare ( Uber/Lyft ) — late nights, early mornings, 1,000+ rides, and more stories than one life should hold.
People fresh out of ERs. Tech workers with haunted eyes. Kids. Addicts. Lovers. Divorces. People on the edge. People on the brink of miracles.
People who just needed someone to ask, “Are you okay?”
I learned things in that car I never learned in school — about trauma,destiny, fear, kindness, chaos, and the quiet confessions strangers make when they think you’ll never see them again.
Some of it was dark.
Some of it was beautiful.
All of it was human.
If you’ve ever wondered who we are beneath our masks, beneath our bravado, beneath our pain — this is what strangers taught me about humanity.
There are soundbaths on the Idiot Mystic YouTube that I can't upload here because they have no talking in them, but if you feel like, stop by there.
Or come talk to me on Discord.
https://discord.gg/dXKjhZrZmM
This episode or whatever these less than 10 minute long things are...is about the moment you realize your conversations — your relationships — your life — have been living in shallow water.It’s about the loneliness of small talk, the ache of unrealized depth, and the strange tragedy of being surrounded by human beings who have entire galaxies inside them… and almost no one dives deep enough to see it.If you’ve felt disconnected from the world’s surface-level chatter…If you miss conversations that breathe…If you long to witness and be witnessed…you might want to check this one out.Because depth is not dangerous.Depth is oxygen.And you were never meant to survive at the surface of your own life.
This episode is about the moment you realize your reflection is only an outline, a silhouette, a weather report.Your body is the ship, the candle holder, the vessel —but you are the flame.This is a meditation on appearance, identity, fasting, restraint, and the strange way the world trains us to live inside images instead of souls.If you’ve ever looked in the mirror and felt a sadness you couldn’t name…If you’ve ever believed your worth depended on aesthetic…If you’ve ever decorated your armor and forgotten you can take it off…this might be something you should listen to.You are not your reflection.You are the consciousness piloting the vessel.Everything else is just weather.
What if the problem isn’t that you haven’t found your niche…but that you’ve forgotten yourself?
In this thing, that some people call an episode, I talk about deleting 400+ hours of work,walking away from strategies, thumbnails, categories,and reclaiming the only voice that actually matters — the real one.
This isn’t creator advice.
It’s a manifesto ( scary word to use ) about identity, destiny, and authenticity in a world that constantly asks you to shrink.
If you’ve ever felt pressured to specialize, to fit into a box, or to perform a version of yourself that never felt right…this episode might be for you.
Stop searching for a niche.
Start searching for who you were before the world tried to organize you.
Everything else is dust.
What do you get when a 1950s radio exec accidentally astral projects, patents brainwave-syncing audio tech, and ends up training U.S. Army personnel to leave their bodies? You get this episode.Today we try explore the mind-bending true story of Robert Monroe and the Monroe Institute — the birthplace of Hemi-Sync, the Gateway Process, and one of the weirdest crossovers between science, spirituality, and national security.We’ll cover:Monroe’s spontaneous out-of-body experiences (OBEs)How binaural beats became a consciousness-hacking toolThe Army’s use of the “Gateway Process” during the Cold WarDeclassified CIA documents that sound like Marvel scriptsWhether the Gateway Program actually ended — or just went deeper undergroundAnd why your Tuesday night meditation might be built on a once-classified military experimentPart brain science, part X-Files, part idiot mystic — this episode is a good primer for anyone who’s curious about the limits of consciousness, the strangeness of history, and why the U.S. government once funded headphone-powered soul travel.This might be one of the last videos like this for a while, I think something much different is coming.I hope you understand that I am trying to lay the building blocks for you of what I know and how I think, so we can see things through a similarly colored lens.
There’s a kind of love that makes you feel seen—and another kind that makes you want to hide.This episode is about that second kind.The one that sees through your armor, the one that knows when you’re pretending to be okay. The kind that doesn’t look away.When we say we want intimacy, what we often mean is: we want to be known, but not too much.Because to be seen fully is to stand without defense—to let someone witness the parts of you that aren’t edited or eloquent. It’s terrifying because it asks for surrender, not performance.This is a reflection on love, safety, and the nervous system.On how we build our identity around being composed, only to find that love wants the trembling version instead.It’s about learning to unclench, one truth at a time—to let connection become the place where healing begins.🎙️ Topics: Vulnerability, Intimacy, Emotional Healing, Love, Fear, Psychology, Spiritual Growth🎧 Listen when: you’re overthinking love, when you’re scared of being known, or when you need to remember that tenderness isn’t weakness.If you want some stuff to read stop by www.idiotmystic.com or if you're looking for an actual conversation about things join our Discord. ( https://discord.gg/dXKjhZrZmM )