Website: 🌐 www.andiclark.com

Self Assessment form: https://subscribepage.io/big-emotions-self-assessment

Book a 30-Minute Call with Andi – Get your questions answered and explore next steps: Book here: https://tidycal.com/andi1/bookacall

In this episode of Kids With Big Emotions, I sit down with Safiya Omosanya to explore the often-overlooked stressors that can impact how our kids think, feel, and behave. From sensory overload to environmental triggers, Safiya shares her insights on what’s really going on beneath the surface when children experience big emotions—and how we as parents can create calmer, more supportive environments.

Together, we talk about moving beyond quick fixes, the importance of parent self-care, and why embracing neurodiversity can transform not only our children’s lives but also our own parenting journey.

Whether you’re in the thick of meltdowns, struggling with school expectations, or simply wondering what else might be affecting your child’s emotional regulation, this conversation is here to guide you.

🔑 Key Takeaways

• Hidden stressors—like noise, smells, light, or overstimulation—can play a bigger role in your child’s meltdowns than you might realize.
• 
  
• Shifting from punishment to understanding opens the door for real connection and growth.
• 
  
• Parent self-care is not optional—it’s foundational to modeling regulation for your child.
• 
  
• Schools and specialists are helpful, but parents are the strongest advocates and anchors for their child’s needs.
• 
  
• Embracing neurodiversity allows children to thrive in their uniqueness rather than feeling “broken” or “less than.”
• 
  

⏱️ Episode Highlights

• [00:00] Introduction and Safiya’s background
• 
  
• [04:20] Why traditional discipline often misses the root cause
• 
  
• [09:45] How hidden environmental stressors affect kids’ behavior
• 
  
• [15:10] The role of parental regulation and self-care
• 
  
• [21:30] Rethinking reliance on schools and specialists
• 
  
• [28:40] Embracing neurodiversity and celebrating strengths
• 
  
• [34:15] Safiya’s takeaways for parents navigating big emotions

To reach out to Safiya Omosanya you can book at call or contact her on LinkedIN.

20 minute complimentary “I’m ready to break cycles” session book at www.calendly.com/SafiyaOmosanya

Linked In 

https://www.linkedin.com/in/safiya-omosanya-aaa46a260

Website: 🌐 www.andiclark.com

Self Assessment form: https://subscribepage.io/big-emotions-self-assessment

Book a 30-Minute Call with Andi – Get your questions answered and explore next steps: Book here: https://tidycal.com/andi1/bookacall

Meltdowns are not a sign your child is being disrespectful—they’re a sign they’re overwhelmed, stuck, or trying to communicate something they don’t yet have the words for. In today’s episode, we’re focusing on how to meet your child where they are in the middle of an emotional outburst, and what to do (and not do) to help them feel safe, seen, and supported.

You’ll learn how your own nervous system impacts your response, why some kids shut down completely, and what’s actually happening in their brains when they “lose it.” You’ll also get ideas you can try today—even if your child refuses every tool you’ve learned.

💡 Key Takeaways

• You can’t teach during a meltdown—the moment is for safety and regulation, not lessons.
• How your own stress animal influences your response—and what to do if you're triggered too.
• Why some kids go silent or “freeze” in the middle of a meltdown, and how to support them without pushing.
• Co-regulation doesn't always look like calming your child down—sometimes it means just being a calm presence beside them.
• Strategies like turning on a calming show or offering stillness aren’t “giving in”—they’re resetting the nervous system.

🕰️ Episode Highlights with Timestamps

• [03:20] What’s really happening in your child’s nervous system during a meltdown—and why logic doesn’t work at that moment.
• [06:12] The difference between a tantrum and a meltdown—and why assuming your child is “in control” can make things worse.
• [09:05] What to do if your child shuts down or goes silent—and why stillness doesn’t mean they’re fine.
• [13:40] How your own stress response shows up in these moments—and how to ground yourself first, even if it’s just one breath.
• [17:55] The one thing that makes co-regulation effective—and why trying to “fix” the meltdown too soon backfires.
• [21:30] Tools that don’t require your child to engage—like a calming show or sitting in quiet together—that reset their nervous system without adding pressure.
• [25:10] Why your child may reject every tool in the moment—and how to stop taking that personally.
• [29:00] A reminder that meltdowns are built up over time—and your response today is one step in a longer journey of safety and trust.

🔗 Resources Mentioned

• “Stress Animals” Framework (Dolphin, Shark, Turtle, Clownfish)  Episode 110 https://andiclark.com/podcast/

• Book a free coaching call: https://tidycal.com/andi1/bookacall 

💬 If this episode helped you see meltdowns in a new light, please share it with a friend or leave a review—it helps more parents feel less alone.

🎙 Listen to all episodes at: https://andiclark.com/podcast/ 

Website: 🌐 www.andiclark.com

Self Assessment form: https://subscribepage.io/big-emotions-self-assessment

Book a 30-Minute Call with Andi – Get your questions answered and explore next steps: Book here: https://tidycal.com/andi1/bookacall

In this powerful conversation, former special education teacher and parent coach Amy Dooley joins Andi to explore what it really means to parent from a place of connection, not control. Amy shares her personal shift from traditional classroom discipline to connection-based parenting, and how that journey led her to support parents in transforming their own limiting beliefs.

Key Takeaways:

• Behavior is a signal, not the problem. When kids act out, it’s often a cry for safety, not defiance.
• You are worthy, even in the mess. Your child doesn’t need a perfect parent—they need a present one.
• Parenting shifts begin with self-work. To truly support your child, start by noticing and healing your own patterns.
• Control isn’t connection. Old-school discipline methods may suppress behavior, but they don't meet your child’s underlying needs.
• Safety comes before strategies. When your child feels seen and supported, their nervous system calms—and so does yours.

Episode Highlights:

[00:00] – Welcome + Amy's background as a teacher and homeschool parent

[02:00] – Early career belief: “Control = good teaching”

[04:50] – The moment Amy realized she wasn’t seeing the child—just the behavior

[06:30] – The Coke bottle metaphor: why behavior is the symptom, not the problem

[08:30] – Shifting from labeling kids to understanding them

[10:00] – Step one: Assigning positive intent to your child

[12:30] – Why parents must start with their own healing

[14:10] – “I am worthy. Period.” and what today’s kids are demanding

[16:00] – Parenting through generational change

[17:50] – The screwdriver and screw analogy: why parent shifts must come first

[20:00] – Why Amy left the classroom to work with parents

[22:30] – A child’s progress is limited when the home foundation is shaky

[25:30] – How presence—not perfection—builds trust

[28:00] – Feeling like you’re not enough as a parent

[30:00] – What “being enough” really looks like in the messiest moments

[33:00] – Why your own regulation matters more than the strategy

[35:00] – Amy’s story of timing meltdowns vs. being present

[37:00] – When you shift, your child’s behavior shifts too

[39:00] – Forgiving your former self and building new tools

[42:00] – The parenting purse analogy: replacing outdated tools

[45:30] – Final message: You are worthy. Your mess doesn’t disqualify you.

Resources Mentioned:

💡 Amy Dooley's Free Quiz: Discover your parenting strengths and get 3 connection-based strategies: https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/683657ece9067900158eb2a9

📱 Follow Amy on Facebook: The Empowered Parent: https://www.facebook.com/empoweredparentcoach/

Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/amy.dooley_parentcoach) + TikTok: @the.empowered.parent (https://www.tiktok.com/@theempoweredparentcoach)

💬 Loved this episode?

If Amy’s message about worthiness and connection-based parenting spoke to you, take a moment to reflect: What outdated tools are you ready to let go of?

You don’t have to do this alone.

Start by exploring Amy’s free quiz to see where your child is struggling and how you can create more calm, connection, and clarity—together.

👉 Tap the links in the show notes to take your next step.

Website: 🌐 www.andiclark.com

Self Assessment form: https://subscribepage.io/big-emotions-self-assessment

Book a 30-Minute Call with Andi – Get your questions answered and explore next steps: Book here: https://tidycal.com/andi1/bookacall

💡 Key Takeaways:

• If your child melts down over getting dressed, avoids homework, or can’t stick with a simple routine—it’s not defiance or laziness. Their brain might be overwhelmed by the steps we’re asking them to take.
• 
  
• Many kids are expected to follow plans or routines before they’re ready—because no one has helped them with the basics their brain needs first.
• 
  
• Before kids can follow a list or stay focused, they need help with skills like noticing what’s happening around them, managing distractions, and stopping themselves from going off track.
• 
  
• When we slow things down and meet them at the step they can handle, they feel more successful—and that’s when real progress begins.
• 
  
• Your child isn’t failing. They just need support that matches how their brain works.

⏱️ Episode Highlights & Timestamps:

• [00:01:15] Why even adults struggle with attention—and how screens play a role
• 
  
• [00:06:40] Real-life examples of attention struggles and how they affect daily routines
• 
  
• [00:08:15] Introducing the fire metaphor: Kindling, logs, and flames of executive functioning
• 
  
• [00:10:20] The four foundational skills that must come before planning
• 
  
• [00:13:10] Why giving your child a “beautiful visual schedule” might still lead to meltdowns
• 
  
• [00:14:35] How skipping steps on the ladder causes overwhelm, shutdowns, and feelings of failure
• 
  
• [00:16:00] The hidden complexity of getting dressed—and why it’s not just one task
• 
  
• [00:18:45] How brain maturation and scaffolding work together over time
• 
  

📚 Resources Mentioned:

• Want to better understand your child’s executive functioning challenges?
• Start with the Kids With Big Emotions Self-Assessment:
• 👉 https://andiclark.com/assessment
• 
  

Ready to explore personalized support?

Book a free 30-minute call to see if 1:1 coaching is the right fit for your family:

👉 https://tidycal.com/andi1/bookacall

Website: 🌐 www.andiclark.com

Support Circle Membership: https://andiclark.thrivecart.com/support-circle/

Self Assessment form: https://subscribepage.io/big-emotions-self-assessment

Book a 30-Minute Call with Andi – Get your questions answered and explore next steps: Book here: https://tidycal.com/andi1/bookacall

In this powerful conversation, I sit down with Licensed Professional Counselor and Registered Play Therapist Megan Hamm, who has spent 17+ years supporting children and families through trauma, crisis, and complex emotional needs. 

Together, we unpack why traditional views of “bad behavior” miss the mark—and what parents can do instead to truly support their children in moments of big emotion.

Whether you’re navigating daily meltdowns, feeling stuck in reaction mode, or simply want to build a deeper connection with your child, Megan offers a compassionate, grounded framework to help you shift from managing behavior to understanding it.

Key Takeaways

• Behavior is communication: Every outburst or meltdown is a signal, not a problem to be fixed.
• Connection comes before correction: Real change begins with relationship, not control.
• In-the-moment responses aren’t the time for teaching: Kids in crisis need safety, not consequences.
• You can’t teach what you haven’t practiced: Parents must build their own regulation tools first.
• Modeling matters more than managing: Your calm presence teaches more than any strategy.
• Changing the environment matters: Preventing crisis often starts with how we set up the home and routine.

Episode Highlights

[00:00] - Introduction to Megan and her background in trauma-informed care

[04:00] - The shift from changing behavior to understanding behavior

[07:00] - What to do when your child is in meltdown: A crisis-response lens

[09:00] - Why calm connection beats consequence every time

[12:00] - How to prepare your home and your nervous system for high-emotion moments

[16:00] - Practicing regulation when things are not chaotic—why timing matters

[20:00] - Why Megan does more parent coaching than direct child therapy

[25:00] - What children really need during a meltdown—and why “fixing” doesn’t work

[30:00] - Letting kids learn through experience and mistakes, without shaming

[36:00] - What to say when others don’t understand your parenting approach

[41:00] - Modeling, natural consequences, and what actually builds lifelong skills

[48:00] - Megan’s book and how to work with her

Resources Mentioned

🔗 Megan Hamm’s Website: www.meganmhamm.com

📖 Book – The Heart of the Matter: Buy here https://buy.stripe.com/5kA4hxcDc2zd0GkbIJ

🔗 LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/meganhamm-lpc

📱 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/meganhammlpc/

👥 Facebook: facebook.com/megan.hamm.554041

🎧 Want to reflect more deeply on your parenting journey?

If this episode stirred something in you or helped you see your child’s behavior in a new light, I invite you to take a quiet moment to explore what support might look like for your family. You don’t have to figure it all out alone.

Website: 🌐 www.andiclark.com

Self Assessment form: https://subscribepage.io/big-emotions-self-assessment

Book a 30-Minute Call with Andi – Get your questions answered and explore next steps: Book here: https://tidycal.com/andi1/bookacall

In this powerful solo episode, Andi walks parents through a foundational truth: you can't help your child regulate if you're still dysregulated yourself. When your child melts down, it’s easy to default to scripts and strategies—yet what your child truly needs is your steady presence. Andi explains how stress animals show up in parenting, why awareness is the first step, and what it really means to become the anchor your child can return to when they’re overwhelmed.

This is Step 3 of Andi’s CARE5™ framework—focused on Regulating Yourself before trying to co-regulate your child.

Key Takeaways

• You can’t co-regulate a child if you’re still activated yourself.
• Knowing your stress animal (shark, clownfish, turtle) helps you interrupt reaction cycles.
• It’s not about getting calm perfectly—it’s about noticing when you’re not.
• Regulation starts with awareness, not strategy.
• You don’t need to fix everything in the moment—your presence is what matters most.

Episode Highlights

[00:00] Why this episode goes before calming your child: it starts with your nervous system.

[02:00] Introduction to the CARE5™ model and its previous steps.

[04:00] “You can’t be the anchor when you’re caught in the wave.”

[06:00] A compassionate reminder that no parent can be calm 100% of the time.

[07:30] Adult stress animals: how yours show up fast in parenting.

[09:00] What happens when a child’s shark triggers your shark (or clownfish or turtle)?

[10:30] You can be a firm shark without being in threat mode.

[12:00] Real-world example: a clownfish parent with a turtle child.

[14:30] “Your nervous system leads the way”—why your calm comes first.

[16:00] Think of your calm as a dock in the storm.

[17:00] Fire drills and stress practice: why we train outside the meltdown.

[18:30] The first shift isn’t behavior—it’s noticing.

[20:00] What your child needs most is you—not the perfect tool or script.

[21:00] How to work with Andi if you want deeper support.

Resources Mentioned

• Episode 110: Understanding Your Child’s Stress Animal: https://open.spotify.com/episode/0vlnDR2iEqZ8K57YxJ5xU7?si=lCs7WKO6TUubNAUpMP_AyQ
• Episode 116: Changing the Lens on Behavior (Step 1 of CARE5™): https://open.spotify.com/episode/0t1mfLsWM6M3szf7PTJwYy?si=0156f0f2a94240b0 

Ready to become the steady anchor your child needs? Start by calming your own waves first.

Website: 🌐 www.andiclark.com

Support Circle Membership: https://andiclark.thrivecart.com/support-circle/

Self Assessment form: https://subscribepage.io/big-emotions-self-assessment

Book a 30-Minute Call with Andi – Get your questions answered and explore next steps: Book here: https://tidycal.com/andi1/bookacall

What if SAT prep wasn’t just about getting a better score—but about helping your child see their worth, trust their process, and feel empowered to handle hard things?

In this conversation, Andi sits down with coach and educator Josh Aronovitch, who’s known for helping kids not just improve test scores—but deeply reconnect with their own strengths. From supporting neurodiverse kids with test anxiety to helping students find the college path that fits who they are, Josh brings a perspective that goes far beyond academics.

Whether your child is preparing for high school, college, or still figuring things out, this episode is packed with emotional insight, practical wisdom, and the kind of hope parents need.

Key Takeaways

• Test-taking is a skill, not a reflection of intelligence. Many kids know the material—they just haven’t been taught how to take tests in a way that works for their brain.
• Your child’s nervous system matters. Emotional regulation, mindset, and even breathwork play a bigger role in performance than most people realize.
• Standardized tests are flawed—but can be a powerful opportunity. With the right tools and perspective, even students who struggle can thrive.
• Success doesn't come from doing it right the first time. The journey—mistakes and all—helps kids build grit, confidence, and the ability to handle life’s curveballs.
• College planning should start with who your child wants to be—not just what job they’ll have.

Episode Highlights

[00:03:00] – Do SATs still matter? Josh explains how “test-optional” doesn’t always mean optional—and why test scores can still open doors.

[00:05:30] – Why kids struggle with testing (and it’s not what you think): From psychological spirals to perfectionism, Josh breaks down what really gets in the way.

[00:08:30] – Helping a student go from 720 to 1190: How a 2-year journey transformed not just scores—but self-belief.

[00:10:45] – Test prep as emotional growth: Why learning to pause, breathe, and “get off the wrong train” changes everything.

[00:16:00] – Understanding before memorizing: Why high-achieving kids often get stuck in math—and how to teach it differently.

[00:21:00] – The truth about multiple choice and second-guessing: Josh shares how depth of thinking can actually backfire—and how to help.

[00:28:30] – Finding the right college path: Josh flips the question—starting with how your child wants to feel, then working backwards.

[00:35:30] – The power of failure: Why kids need safe experiences with mistakes in order to grow.

[00:41:00] – A client story: 7 SATs, a perfect score in math, and med school dreams realized.

[00:46:00] – Josh’s global lifestyle and why travel helps kids dream bigger: A story about dancing, yoga, and finding joy through discomfort.

Resources Mentioned

Connect with Josh:

• Website: www.aronovitchcoaching.com
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ARONOVITCHCOACHING
• Instagram: https://instagram.com/joshthesatguy 
• LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/josharonovitch/
• Text Josh directly: 856-341-0503
• Retreat: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1AbgkhYVGakwYWtG-vSYOe6Zo94AX5Mrk0omdu77w36g/edit?usp=sharing

If you loved this episode, make sure to subscribe and leave a review!

Website: 🌐 www.andiclark.com

Self Assessment form: https://subscribepage.io/big-emotions-self-assessment

Book a 30-Minute Call with Andi – Get your questions answered and explore next steps: Book here: https://tidycal.com/andi1/bookacall

If your child seems to flip from calm to chaos without warning, this episode will change the way you see those outbursts.

What if their “bad behavior” isn’t defiance—but a sign their nervous system is overloaded?

In this foundational episode, Andi introduces Step 1 of the CARE5™ Framework: Changing the Lens.

You’ll learn why traditional discipline often backfires, how to recognize stress signals in your child, and what’s really happening beneath those emotional explosions.

Using the Coke bottle analogy and real-life examples, Andi helps you shift from guilt and frustration to clarity and compassion—so you can begin responding instead of reacting.

Key Takeaways:

• “Misbehavior” is often a stress response—not manipulation or disrespect.
• Emotional outbursts tend to happen when a child’s nervous system is overwhelmed.
• The first step to supporting your child is changing how you interpret their behavior.
• Our nervous systems react faster than logic—especially under chronic stress.
• You can’t co-regulate your child until you first regulate your own nervous system.

Episode Highlights:

[00:00:00] Welcome + what the CARE5™ Framework is and how it helps

[00:03:00] Common mismatch between adult expectations and child capacity

[00:04:30] Story: Pokémon night meltdown and uncovering the hidden stress

[00:07:30] What happens in the brain and body when a child feels unsafe

[00:10:00] Reframing defiance as an overwhelmed nervous system

[00:11:00] Coke bottle analogy: how stress builds invisibly before it explodes

[00:13:30] Why home becomes the safe place where meltdowns happen

[00:16:00] The life vest metaphor: why discipline isn’t what they need

[00:18:00] Small stressors that shook my son's Coke bottle that day

[00:19:00] Recap: Step 1 of the CARE5™ Framework – Change the Lens

[00:21:00] Preview of Step 2: Stress Animals (listen to Episode 110)

Resources Mentioned:

• 🎧 Episode 110 – Understanding Your Child’s Stress Animal: https://open.spotify.com/episode/0vlnDR2iEqZ8K57YxJ5xU7?si=lCs7WKO6TUubNAUpMP_AyQ 

Ready to see your child’s behavior through a new lens?

Website: 🌐 www.andiclark.com

Self Assessment form: https://subscribepage.io/big-emotions-self-assessment

Book a 30-Minute Call with Andi – Get your questions answered and explore next steps: Book here: https://tidycal.com/andi1/bookacall

In this powerful episode, Melissa McIntosh—former Educational Assistant turned mindfulness mentor—shares her journey from burnout in the school system to building Mindful Kids Inc. 

Her mission? Helping families reconnect through simple, effective mindfulness practices that truly support emotional regulation. 

We explore why mindfulness isn’t just for kids, how parents can model regulation, and what it really means to build a calm home from the inside out.

Key Takeaways

• Mindfulness is a lifestyle, not a technique – It’s about consistent, bite-sized practices that shift the family dynamic over time.
• One size doesn't fit all – Each child has unique tools that work for them; helping them discover what fits is the magic.
• Academics aren't the foundation – Emotional awareness must come first for real learning and connection.
• You are the expert on your child – Trusting your intuition, even when it goes against the system, is critical.

Episode Highlights

[00:00] – Meet Melissa: Her transition from education to mindfulness, and why she followed her gut.

[03:45] – The moment she realized the system wasn’t working—for kids, for families, or for herself.

[06:30] – Why her husband’s calm energy opened the door to mindfulness—and how it changed everything at home.

[10:15] – The missing piece in schools: involving parents and seeing the whole child, not just academics.

[14:00] – Why mindfulness must start with parents before it can help their children.

[18:15] – How kids can learn to filter outside energy, like “Steve’s nosebleed,” through a calm lens.

[22:00] – The Mind Jar explained: how a simple tool helps kids settle their thoughts and feelings.

[26:00] – What it looks like when kids start teaching mindfulness at home—and why that’s the real win.

[30:00] – Mindfulness as a superpower that grows with your child over time.

[33:45] – What to do when kids are dysregulated and the tool doesn’t “work.”

[36:00] – The moment you realize: it’s working.

[38:00] – Why gratitude is part of mindfulness—and how it changes the emotional tone of a family.

Resources Mentioned

Mindful Kids Inc. – Melissa’s mindfulness-based programs for kids and families:

https://www.mindfulkidsinc.com

Follow Melissa on

• Instagram: @mindfulkidsinc
• Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/mindfulkidsinc

If this episode resonated with you, please subscribe and share it with a friend who’s raising a child with big emotions.

Website: 🌐 www.andiclark.com

Self Assessment form: https://subscribepage.io/big-emotions-self-assessment

Book a 30-Minute Call with Andi – Get your questions answered and explore next steps: Book here: https://tidycal.com/andi1/bookacall

What drives some kids to push themselves relentlessly while others seem to lack motivation altogether? 

In this episode, Andi explores what’s underneath both ends of the spectrum—overachieving and underachieving—and what parents might be missing. 

Whether your child is racing ahead with academic goals or struggling to get started, this episode will help you understand the hidden executive functioning struggles that shape their behavior and what to do about it.

Key Takeaways

• Overachievement can mask underlying executive functioning struggles, especially in social, emotional, or sleep areas.
• Underachievement isn’t laziness—it often stems from overwhelm, fear of failure, or difficulties with initiation and planning.
• Asking curious, compassionate questions helps kids reflect and create flexibility in their goals and timelines.
• The “gap vs. gain” mindset shift (from Dan Sullivan and Benjamin Hardy’s book) helps both parents and kids celebrate progress instead of chasing perfection.
• Progress looks different for every child—sometimes the slowest pace is the most meaningful.

Episode Highlights & Timestamps

[00:00] – Introduction: Why kids may be overly driven or totally disengaged

[01:40] – A real-life story: A teen pushing for an associate’s degree before high school graduation

[03:00] – The missed question: Have we stopped to celebrate progress?

[04:00] – How executive functioning struggles can hide behind academic success

[05:30] – Challenges like inhibition, switching tasks, and sleep issues in high achievers

[06:00] – The opposite end: Kids with no drive and what’s behind the shutdown

[07:00] – A deeper dive into executive functioning (initiation, flexibility, planning, etc.)

[08:30] – Explaining the Gap and the Gain framework to kids

[10:00] – Guiding kids through flexible thinking with curious questions

[12:00] – Using short-term scenarios (like Lego or ice cream) to build long-term skills

[13:00] – Helping high achievers reflect, rest, and regulate

[14:30] – Using tools like health trackers (Whoop, Oura) to validate rest

[15:45] – Supporting disengaged kids through tiny wins and drive-by praise

[17:30] – Honoring their pace and effort over outcome

[18:45] – Questions for parents: Where is your child thriving on the surface but struggling underneath?

[20:00] – Modeling balance and rest as a parent

[21:15] – Final thoughts: Both drive and disinterest can hide deeper needs

Resources Mentioned

The Gap and the Gain by Dan Sullivan & Dr. Benjamin Hardy

Executive Functioning Podcast Series

• Ep. 85 Perception: Emotional Regulation 101: https://open.spotify.com/episode/2TNuHQyoCA9VhiSOWWqRSG?si=PWEUzBd9STKiJ1pKDBiCJg 
• Ep. 86 Attention: Struggles Aren’t Always ADHD: https://open.spotify.com/episode/16DRPoFWy78XlLvmCDF0kW?si=lTaIMc3lQPCuHVHuttTU0Q
• Ep.88 What is Working Memory? Part 1: Verbal Working Memory: https://open.spotify.com/episode/3Vavf1BBwLwORkai5ZIwcX?si=0Z-n6cRkSEquqJ2b6tYPOg
• Ep. 89 What is Working Memory? Part 2: Non Verbal Working Memory: https://open.spotify.com/episode/4Ygbn1LqDNrvL9MPDydkDp?si=KwdSPvC-QdeIXKWt-WMQ9A
• Ep. 90 Inhibition: Helping your child navigate impulsivity: https://open.spotify.com/episode/3eZWomMOv5V7emtZrClYlU?si=6Vlvgod5QFiqhhpwMBXm4Q
• Ep. 93 Initiation: Why Getting Started Is Hard For Some Kids And How To Help: https://open.spotify.com/episode/695CBuXzpx0juVy08VKmDO?si=85Ql0vAJRPqlai-68_CRZw
• Ep.94 Cognitive Flexibility: Why Perfectionism and Inflexible Thinking Go Hand in Hand: https://open.spotify.com/episode/3adl8y66voFQL5lrvKLFFn?si=cqnK67s_RdSMI_6qVJ-ubg
• 110 Understanding Your Child’s Stress Animal Is the Key to Calmer Days: https://open.spotify.com/episode/0vlnDR2iEqZ8K57YxJ5xU7?si=r6Mrqn5DQru28qLF9EW7Cg

Website: 🌐 www.andiclark.com

Self Assessment form: https://subscribepage.io/big-emotions-self-assessment

Book a 30-Minute Call with Andi – Get your questions answered and explore next steps: Book here: https://tidycal.com/andi1/bookacall

In this episode, I sit down with my good friend Kristina Rajes—homeschooling mom of four and the creator behind Phoenix Gems and Buy Some Love.

We talk about how gemstones unexpectedly became a key support tool for our kids’ emotional regulation, creativity, and confidence. 

From skeptical teens to intuitive empaths, Kristina shares how each of her children uses different stones in meaningful ways—and how this tool complements the deeper work we do with stress, sleep, and executive functioning.

Key Takeaways

• Gemstones can act as emotional support tools—especially for sensitive or empathic kids who absorb others’ energy.
• Each stone has unique energetic properties that can help with grounding, courage, creativity, focus, and calm.
• Kids often choose the stones they need without realizing it—color and instinct often guide them.
• Tools like bracelets and gemstone routines are not about “fixing” kids but supporting them alongside emotional regulation work.
• It's okay if a child isn’t ready—these tools work best when chosen, not forced.
• Parents can benefit too—especially those who feel emotionally drained after public or social interactions.

Episode Highlights

[00:01:00] Homeschooling with intention and personalization for each child

[00:03:30] How ChatGPT supports Kristina's multi-level homeschool planning

[00:05:00] Kristina’s unexpected shift from law to gemstone healing

[00:07:30] Why most of her business is in-person (and the importance of “feeling” a stone)

[00:09:00] How her empath daughter benefits from obsidian—and refuses all jewelry except that bracelet

[00:10:00] Kristina’s science-minded son and his surprising shift after wearing Carnelian

[00:13:00] The twin tiger’s eye story—two anxious kids conquering their fear of heights at rock climbing

[00:16:00] My own son’s struggles with creativity—and how his bracelet helped spark new ideas

[00:20:00] How to charge gemstone bracelets (easier than you think!)

[00:22:00] The bracelet stacks that changed my stress patterns—and what my health data shows

[00:26:00] What it means when a child “feels like a basketball is bouncing inside them”

[00:29:00] Which stones help with anxiety, courage, and creative thinking

[00:31:00] Customizing bracelets for fidget needs, essential oils, or comfort charms

[00:34:00] Why intention and resonance matter more than forcing a child to wear a stone

[00:35:00] How Kristina’s bracelet bar works at live shows—and the energy parents feel when choosing stones

[00:36:30] Right hand vs. left hand: giving vs. receiving energy through gemstones

[00:38:00] The evil eye charm and how it supports kids who struggle with attention or energy overload

[00:40:00] How you can connect with Kristina at local shows or on social media

Resources Mentioned

Kristina’s Gemstone Instagram: @phoenixgemsco: https://www.instagram.com/phoenixgemsco/

Kristina’s Kids Bracelet Line: @buysomelove: https://www.instagram.com/buysomelove

Gem Expo Toronto (July, Downtown at the Hyatt Regency): https://thegemexpo.com

If you found this episode helpful, subscribe to the podcast and share it with a parent who’s looking for gentle, supportive tools for their child.

Website: 🌐 www.andiclark.com

Self Assessment form: https://subscribepage.io/big-emotions-self-assessment

Book a 30-Minute Call with Andi – Get your questions answered and explore next steps: Book here: https://tidycal.com/andi1/bookacall 

Is your child refusing to start their homework, melting down when asked to pack a backpack, or avoiding simple tasks? It might look like laziness—but it’s not. 

In this episode, Andi Clark breaks down what’s really going on beneath procrastination. Hint: it’s not about effort or motivation. It’s about executive functioning struggles—and missing foundational skills most people don’t talk about.

You'll walk away with a new lens for understanding your child’s behavior, insights on how to reduce shame and frustration, and actionable first steps to break the cycle of procrastination.

Key Takeaways:

• Procrastination is not laziness—it’s often a sign of overwhelmed executive functioning.
• Skills like initiation, working memory, time awareness, emotional regulation, and flexibility all play a role.
• Pushing harder or offering rewards won’t work unless the root cause is addressed.
• There is no one-size-fits-all solution—support needs to match your child’s specific gaps.
• Using the right scaffolding and starting with small wins can rebuild confidence and momentum.

Episode Highlights:

[00:00:00] – Introduction: Why procrastination isn’t laziness

[00:01:00] – What executive functioning really is

[00:03:00] – Real-life examples: Andi’s son and homework meltdowns

[00:05:00] – Breakdown of key executive functioning skills that affect procrastination

[00:08:00] – How time perception and emotional regulation influence task avoidance

[00:10:00] – Observing your child’s patterns and asking the right questions

[00:11:00] – The shame cycle of procrastination and how it snowballs

[00:12:00] – Why planners, timers, and charts often don’t work

[00:15:00] – The fire analogy: Flames, logs, and kindling in EF support

[00:17:00] – Questions to help identify where your child’s breakdown is happening

[00:18:00] – Why patching top-level behaviors won’t work without a foundation

[00:20:00] – How to offer real support: Start with one EF skill, build small wins

[00:22:00] – Reframing procrastination as a skill gap, not a character flaw

[00:23:00] – Next steps: Self-assessment, Support Circle, and 1:1 coaching options

You’re not alone in this—understanding what’s really behind your child’s procrastination is the first step toward creating more calm, connection, and progress at home.

Website: 🌐 www.andiclark.com

Self Assessment form: https://subscribepage.io/big-emotions-self-assessment

Book a 30-Minute Call with Andi – Get your questions answered and explore next steps: Book here: https://tidycal.com/andi1/bookacall 

What if your child’s refusal to brush their teeth, get dressed, or follow instructions wasn’t about defiance—but about survival?

In this episode, I talk with Amanda Preston—social worker, mom to eight neurodivergent kids, and expert in Autism, stress responses and misunderstood behavior. We explore what’s really going on when kids can’t do something that seems so simple and how the traditional approaches to parenting can actually make things worse.

If your child resists everyday tasks, melts down over small requests, or seems to need total control just to function… This conversation is for you.

Key Takeaways

• Not all kids who "act out" are being oppositional—some are having a threat response to everyday demands.
• Many kids who seem "fine at school" and fall apart at home are masking their stress to get through the day.
• Standard parenting strategies often backfire with these kids—what they need is a low-demand, relationship-based approach.
• Diagnosis like autism can show up in ways parents don’t expect—especially when kids are bright, sensitive, and highly verbal.
• Understanding your child’s nervous system is more effective than enforcing rules or routines.

Episode Highlights

[00:02:00] – What “neurodivergent” really means and why so many parents misunderstand it

[00:04:00] – When everyday tasks feel threatening to your child’s nervous system

[00:06:30] – Why these kids often get misdiagnosed or misunderstood as “difficult”

[00:09:30] – Andi shares her personal experience of trying to get help (and the resistance she faced)

[00:11:00] – The four stress responses and how they show up differently in different kids

[00:15:30] – Why typical parenting tools (like consequences) make things worse

[00:18:00] – Real-life examples of low-demand parenting in action

[00:21:30] – Sensory struggles with food, clothes, and hygiene—and how to stop fighting them

[00:26:00] – What to know before seeking an autism assessment

[00:31:00] – Why even a thorough psychoeducational assessment can miss what’s really going on

[00:36:00] – Autism is a spectrum—and most people only recognize one tiny part of it

[00:40:00] – How to spot the “freeze” response that often gets mistaken for stubbornness

[00:44:00] – Amanda’s advice for schools, co-parents, and extended family

[00:49:00] – Small tools that help kids regulate—like snacks, bubble gum, or getting down to their level

Resources Mentioned

Amanda Preston’s websites

– Canada-Based Support:https://deercreektherapy.ca/

– International Parent Coaching: https://amandapreston.co

Instagram Accounts

– @deercreektherapy: https://www.instagram.com/deercreektherapy

– @the_neurodivergent_bunch: www.instagram.com/the_neurodivergent_bunch

– @thefostermomsocialworker: https://www.instagram.com/thefostermomsocialworker

Books & Experts Mentioned

– Is This Autism? by Dr. Donna Henderson

– Low-Demand Parenting by Amanda Diekman

– Self-Reg by Dr. Stuart Shanker

– The Explosive Child by Dr. Ross Greene

– Kristy Forbes and the Intune Pathways course

– NeuroWild on Facebook for bite-sized visual resources

If this episode made you feel seen—know you’re not alone. You can find more resources, support, and next steps below.

Website: 🌐 www.andiclark.com

Self Assessment form: https://subscribepage.io/big-emotions-self-assessment

Book a 30-Minute Call with Andi – Get your questions answered and explore next steps: Book here: https://tidycal.com/andi1/bookacall 

If you’ve ever found yourself asking, “Why is nothing working?” when your child is melting down, this episode is for you.

In today’s episode, Andi introduces the concept of Stress Animals—a powerful and accessible framework to help parents decode their child’s behavior in moments of emotional overwhelm. 

You’ll learn how to spot the early signs of dysregulation, understand your child’s stress response, and most importantly, how to shift your own energy so you can help your child return to calm.

Key Takeaways:

• Every child has a unique stress response—and it’s not about bad behavior, it’s about nervous system overload.
• The Stress Animal framework (Dolphin, Shark, Turtle, Clownfish) helps parents identify how their child reacts to stress—and how to support them accordingly.
• Your own stress animal matters too. The way you react can either soothe or escalate your child’s stress state.
• You can’t connect through correction. Lasting change happens when you meet your child’s stress with the kind of connection they need.
• Regulation before resolution: Problem-solving comes after calming the nervous system—never during a meltdown.

Episode Highlights & Timestamps:

[00:00] Introduction – What to expect & why this matters

[02:00] Why traditional strategies fail with dysregulated kids

[05:00] The biology of stress – nervous system states explained

[06:45] Introducing the Stress Animals:

Dolphin – The regulated, connected state

Shark – Explosive, reactive energy

Turtle – Shut-down, withdrawn, retreating energy

Clownfish – Anxious, people-pleasing, over-worrying

[11:00] How your stress animal impacts your child’s response

[13:30] Why we don’t want to be in dolphin all the time

[14:00] Matching your response to your child’s stress animal

[15:00] Real-life examples: what worked, what didn’t, and why

[20:00] Supporting the nervous system through grounding tools

[21:00] One family’s story: shifting from Clownfish to quiet presence

[22:00] Final thoughts – Why this approach changes everything

✨ You’re not expected to get this right every time. But every step toward understanding helps build the connection your child needs to feel safe and supported.

Website: 🌐 www.andiclark.com

Self Assessment form: https://subscribepage.io/big-emotions-self-assessment

Book a 30-Minute Call with Andi – Get your questions answered and explore next steps: Book here: https://tidycal.com/andi1/bookacall 

Parenting isn’t just about raising our kids—it’s also about healing ourselves. In this powerful conversation, Jenn Abbatiello shares her journey from perfectionism and high achievement to learning how to parent with connection, grace, and calm. Together, we dive deep into how generational patterns shape our parenting styles, how to navigate grief and guilt in motherhood, and what it really takes to build a joyful, connected family—without losing yourself in the process.

Whether you're feeling burnt out, stuck in old ways, or unsure how to support your child without repeating the past, this episode will help you feel seen, understood, and ready for change.

Key Takeaways

• Parenting often brings us to our breaking point—but it’s also an opportunity for transformation.
• Grief is a natural part of parenting—especially when letting go of our “old life.”
• You can love your children and miss the life you had before. Both can be true.
• Punishment and disconnection aren't the only tools. Understanding leads to true change.
• Kids don’t need us to be perfect—they need us to be regulated and real.
• We can’t support our children in becoming their true selves if we haven’t done the work ourselves.

Episode Highlights

00:00 – Meet Jenn Abbatiello: Her story of shifting from corporate success to parenting transformation

02:00 – What it feels like to lose joy in motherhood—and why it’s so common

04:30 – Mourning your old life and learning to live in the and

06:15 – The “stoic badge of honor” and how emotions come roaring in with motherhood

10:15 – Why gentle parenting gets misinterpreted—and how to define consequences with compassion

12:30 – A real-life example of consequences vs. punishment with Jenn’s child

14:00 – Andi’s story about her son, Pokémon, and helping him take ownership

16:00 – What schools miss: Executive functioning, stress, and the root cause of meltdowns

17:45 – What to do during a meltdown vs. after a meltdown

20:30 – Why your child’s behavior triggers you—and what that means for your healing

22:00 – Jenn’s story of colic, control, and generational expectations

25:30 – The parenting puzzle: So many pieces, and why healing yourself matters

27:00 – Letting your child be themself—and why that requires your own growth

30:00 – Living someone else's dream vs. letting your kids follow their own

34:00 – Childhood programming, identity, and subconscious stories

36:00 – Andi’s IFS story: How one childhood memory created a lifelong belief

39:00 – Why self-care isn’t selfish—and how to do it in your current season

42:00 – Jenn’s encouragement for parents feeling stuck or overwhelmed

Resources Mentioned

Jenn Abbatiello’s free email series:

• Name: 3 Critical Steps to Parenting with Ease
• 🔗 https://www.yourtransformedfamily.com/start

Connect with Jenn Abbatiello:

🔗 LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jennifer-abbatiello

📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/yourtransformedfamily/

🌐 Website: https://www.yourtransformedfamily.com/

Website: 🌐 www.andiclark.com

Self Assessment form: https://subscribepage.io/big-emotions-self-assessment

Book a 30-Minute Call with Andi – Get your questions answered and explore next steps: Book here: https://tidycal.com/andi1/bookacall 

If your child has ever been labeled as dramatic, difficult, or lazy… this episode is for you. Andi breaks down the most common behaviors reported by over 60 parents who filled out the Kids With Big Emotions Self-Assessment—and reveals what’s really going on underneath.

This isn’t just about behavior. It’s about root causes, hidden struggles, and executive functioning challenges that often get missed in schools and misunderstood at home.

Key Takeaways

• Behavior is the tip of the iceberg—executive functioning is often what’s underneath.
• Kids aren’t being difficult on purpose. They’re often overwhelmed, misunderstood, or unsupported in key areas of brain development.
• Sensitivities to sound, clothing, and transitions may be signs of deeper processing challenges or superpowers that need support to shine.
• Many kids labeled as lazy, disorganized, or disruptive actually have struggles with working memory, attention, or impulse control.
• Shifting from judgment to curiosity helps uncover patterns and truly support your child’s needs.
• The self-assessment form is a powerful first step to uncover what’s going on beneath the surface.

Episode Highlights & Timestamps

[00:00] Welcome & overview of the parent self-assessment results

[02:00] What 66 parents revealed—140 out of 180 average checkmarks

[03:00] Big emotions, meltdowns, impulse struggles—what the numbers say

[04:00] Why behavior-based discipline often misses the real problem

[05:00] Sensory sensitivity as a superpower—and why it needs support

[06:45] Trouble learning from mistakes? This might be why.

[08:00] Why schools often miss what’s really going on

[09:15] From behavior to brain: what to look for underneath

[10:30] Start tracking patterns—what triggers overwhelm or shutdowns

[12:00] Writing struggles, masking, and misunderstood learning differences

[13:30] Why executive functioning assessments matter

[14:30] What to say instead of “Why didn’t you do this?”

[15:15] Helping your child feel understood and supported

[16:00] Speaking the language of executive functioning in IEPs

[17:00] Concrete examples: working memory, impulsivity, perception

[18:00] Tools, links, and next steps for parents ready to dig deeper

Resources Mentioned

Kids With Big Emotions Self-Assessment: Click here to get the form: https://subscribepage.io/big-emotions-self-assessment

Executive Functioning Podcast Series

• Ep. 85 Perception: Emotional Regulation 101: https://open.spotify.com/episode/2TNuHQyoCA9VhiSOWWqRSG?si=PWEUzBd9STKiJ1pKDBiCJg 
• Ep. 86 Attention: Struggles Aren’t Always ADHD: https://open.spotify.com/episode/16DRPoFWy78XlLvmCDF0kW?si=lTaIMc3lQPCuHVHuttTU0Q
• Ep.88 What is Working Memory? Part 1: Verbal Working Memory: https://open.spotify.com/episode/3Vavf1BBwLwORkai5ZIwcX?si=0Z-n6cRkSEquqJ2b6tYPOg
• Ep. 89 What is Working Memory? Part 2: Non Verbal Working Memory: https://open.spotify.com/episode/4Ygbn1LqDNrvL9MPDydkDp?si=KwdSPvC-QdeIXKWt-WMQ9A
• Ep. 90 Inhibition: Helping your child navigate impulsivity: https://open.spotify.com/episode/3eZWomMOv5V7emtZrClYlU?si=6Vlvgod5QFiqhhpwMBXm4Q
• Ep. 93 Initiation: Why Getting Started Is Hard For Some Kids And How To Help: https://open.spotify.com/episode/695CBuXzpx0juVy08VKmDO?si=85Ql0vAJRPqlai-68_CRZw
• Ep.94 Cognitive Flexibility: Why Perfectionism and Inflexible Thinking Go Hand in Hand: https://open.spotify.com/episode/3adl8y66voFQL5lrvKLFFn?si=cqnK67s_RdSMI_6qVJ-ubg

If this episode spoke to you, take five minutes to go through the assessment—it’s the first step to seeing your child more clearly, with less blame and more understanding.

Website: 🌐 www.andiclark.com

Self Assessment form: https://subscribepage.io/big-emotions-self-assessment

Book a 30-Minute Call with Andi – Get your questions answered and explore next steps: Book here: https://tidycal.com/andi1/bookacall 

In this heart-opening conversation, I’m joined by an early childhood expert, parent coach, and grandma Rose Couse. With over 40 years of experience supporting kids, educators, and families, Rose shares powerful insights on parenting through grief, the true meaning of self-care, and how to shift from judgment to compassion in your parenting journey.

We talk about the invisible load parents carry, the guilt that often surrounds taking time for ourselves, and how small, daily moments of awareness can help us better connect with our kids—and ourselves.

Key Takeaways

• Self-care isn’t a luxury—it’s a necessity for parenting with presence and compassion.
• Awareness of your internal experience is key to helping your child regulate theirs.
• Regulation is contagious—your nervous system affects your child’s.
• Grief, stress, and trauma show up in parenting in subtle and powerful ways.
• You’re doing better than you think. Shifting your inner dialogue can change how you show up.

Episode Highlights

00:00 – Welcome and guest intro

02:00 – Rose’s journey from early childhood educator to parent coach

04:00 – The biggest surprise of parenting: It’s not just about the kids

06:30 – Why parents need self-awareness to parent well

08:15 – Parenting through grief and the invisible fear of not doing “enough”

10:45 – Breaking generational patterns of putting yourself last

12:30 – Why we admire others’ strength but struggle to see our own

14:45 – The healing power of community and connection

17:30 – What real self-care looks like (hint: it’s not bubble baths)

20:15 – Understanding the “body budget” and parenting under stress

23:30 – Why breathing for 12 minutes a day changes your brain

27:15 – Simple grounding tools in the middle of chaos

30:00 – Modeling emotional awareness for your kids

32:30 – Joy as a parenting practice

36:00 – The importance of celebrating small wins

39:00 – Helping kids notice their own body signals and emotions

42:00 – Three questions to ground yourself in hard parenting moments

44:00 – Final thoughts and how to connect with Rose

Resources Mentioned

• Rose’s blog + parent coaching: http://www.rmcouse.ca/ 
• Robin Gobbel – trauma-informed parenting educator: robingobbel.com
• Amishi Jha’s work on attention and focus – including her breathing practice research
• Lisa Feldman Barrett’s “body budget” concept – from How Emotions Are Made
• Rick Hanson’s “Velcro vs. Teflon” idea – from Hardwiring Happiness

If this episode resonated with you, share it with a friend! And don’t forget to connect with Rose, follow her on 

Instagram (https://www.instagram.com/r.m.couse/) or 

Facebook (https://www.facebook.com/r.m.couse)

Website: 🌐 www.andiclark.com

Self Assessment form: https://subscribepage.io/big-emotions-self-assessment

Book a 30-Minute Call with Andi – Get your questions answered and explore next steps: Book here: https://tidycal.com/andi1/bookacall 

Sometimes the child who seems “fine” — quiet, cooperative, and academically strong — is actually the one silently struggling. 

In this deeply personal episode, Andi shares what she recently discovered about her one son's hidden stress responses and executive functioning challenges, despite being the so-called “easy” kid of her two kids.  

She walks through the emotional rollercoaster of guilt, the importance of slowing down, and how “doing well” on paper doesn't always mean everything is okay underneath.

Key Takeaways

• Just because a child is quiet, compliant, or “gifted” doesn’t mean they aren’t struggling emotionally or cognitively.
• The turtle stress response (shutdown, avoidance, compliance) can hide significant executive functioning challenges.
• It’s easy to skip foundational skills when we’re anxious to “fix” the problem — even when we know better.
• Support begins with understanding where your child is truly struggling, not just reacting to behavior.
• Academic success doesn’t automatically reflect emotional regulation or executive functioning strength.
• Slowing down and building skills step-by-step is the real shortcut to lasting change.

Episode Highlights

[00:01:00] – What it means when the “good kid” isn’t actually fine

[00:03:00] – The gifted child who won the “Silent but Deadly” award — and what it masked

[00:05:00] – Signs of executive functioning struggles hiding beneath compliance

[00:07:00] – When guilt kicks in: The parenting moment Andi didn’t expect

[00:09:00] – Why compassion and collaboration beats punishment

[00:10:00] – Learning ladders: Meeting kids where they’re actually at

[00:13:00] – Helping kids in school when executive functioning is the issue

[00:15:00] – Real-life changes that helped Andi’s son thrive

[00:17:00] – Reframing school as executive functioning training

[00:20:00] – A focus tool from Peak Mind by Amishi Jha that actually worked

[00:21:00] – Letting go of grades as the only measure of success

[00:23:00] – Why helping your child succeed means seeing what’s really going on

Resources Mentioned

Book: Peak Mind by Dr. Amishi Jha – A science-based guide to improving focus and attention: https://amishi.com/books/peak-mind

Self-Assessment Form – Understand hidden executive functioning and emotional struggles: Click here to access: https://subscribepage.io/big-emotions-self-assessment

Website: 🌐 www.andiclark.com

Book a 30-Minute Call with Andi – Get your questions answered and explore next steps: Book here: https://tidycal.com/andi1/bookacall 

When your child struggles with homework, meltdowns, or falling behind—especially when they’re bright—the issue may not be academic at all. 

In this episode, Andi sits down with Allie Bourke, owner of Oxford Learning in Waterloo, Ontario, to talk about how executive functioning shapes everything from learning and memory to focus, flexibility, and frustration tolerance.

Allie shares insights from her 19+ years supporting kids through cognitive and academic assessments—and explains why understanding how your child learns is often more important than what they’re learning.

Key Takeaways:

• Why executive functioning struggles often show up as academic issues, behavior challenges, or emotional outbursts
• How standard report cards miss critical learning and cognitive skill gaps
• The difference between the school system and individual teachers—and how to build collaborative support
• How to help your child when they “know it” but can’t show it
• Why some kids shut down over homework even when the material is “easy”
• The role of flexibility, memory, inhibition, and self-monitoring in learning success
• How parents can advocate more effectively (and when to bring in outside support)

Episode Highlights:

[00:00] – Andi introduces Allie and her background in child psychology and education

[02:00] – Why so many kids struggle in school even when they’re bright

[05:00] – What executive functioning looks like in everyday classroom behavior

[07:30] – Real-life examples of cognitive inflexibility and how they impact learning

[10:00] – The homework meltdown: why it’s not just about the math

[12:00] – Executive functioning vs. academic level—when your child knows the answers but can’t get them on paper

[15:00] – How Oxford Learning uses both academic and cognitive assessments to get a full picture

[19:00] – Dysgraphia, working memory, and why testing format matters

[24:00] – Why some parents shouldn’t be their child’s teacher—and how to recognize when to step back

[30:00] – Talking to schools when expectations don’t match your child’s current ability

[35:00] – What to do if your child is always chasing “perfect marks” but losing confidence

[42:00] – Helping kids build self-awareness, pause before reacting, and choose recovery

[45:00] – Final thoughts from Allie: don’t wait if you suspect something’s off

Resources Mentioned:

FREE Dynamic Assessment (Reg. $275):

Oxford Learning Waterloo is offering a free academic + cognitive assessment to Kids With Big Emotions podcast listeners!

Offer expires May 31, 2025.

Available in-person only at the Waterloo, ON location.

👉 To book:

📧 Email: waterloo@oxfordlearning.com

📞 Call: 1-519-725-3577

📍 Mention you heard about it on the Kids With Big Emotions podcast

🔗 Social:

• Instagram: @oxfordlearningwaterloo https://www.instagram.com/oxfordlearningwaterloo/
• Facebook: Oxford Learning Waterloo: https://www.facebook.com/OxfordLearningWaterloo

Website: 🌐 www.andiclark.com

Book a 30-Minute Call with Andi – Get your questions answered and explore next steps: Book here: https://tidycal.com/andi1/bookacall 

What if your child’s “too muchness” is exactly what the world needs?

In this episode, Andi explores how children who are sensitive, intense, passionate, or deeply curious are often misunderstood, redirected, or told to tone it down—and how this can quietly create lasting emotional wounds. She breaks down the subtle, invisible forms of trauma kids experience when the world isn’t ready for their gifts and offers tools for helping your child celebrate who they are instead of shrinking to fit in.

Whether your child is being told they’re “too loud,” “too sensitive,” “too smart,” or “too intense,” this episode will help you reframe those messages and support them in developing confidence, connection, and self-awareness—without ever having to change who they are.

Key Takeaways

• Trauma isn’t just big events—it’s anything that feels like too much, too soon, too fast, or too long.
• Many neurodiverse kids internalize subtle redirections and dismissals as proof that something is “wrong” with them.
• Kids who are deeply curious or emotionally intense may feel misunderstood unless we celebrate their “too much” instead of trying to fix or mute it.
• Teaching kids how to use a “dial,” not a mute button, helps them adjust to different environments without losing their identity.
• Supporting kids through their sensitivities and passions builds resilience and helps them develop a strong sense of self.

Episode Highlights

[00:00] – Opening reflection: Why kids are told they’re too much—and what it does to them

[02:00] – Personal story: How a whiteboard and math at dinner challenged expectations

[03:00] – Trauma redefined: Not just big events, but how experiences shape nervous systems

[05:00] – The impact of being misunderstood or redirected as a child

[06:00] – How feeling others’ emotions can be overwhelming—and how to manage it

[07:00] – Breaking down trauma: too much, too soon, too fast, too long

[08:30] – Academic mismatch: When a child’s intellectual level doesn’t match emotional readiness

[10:00] – Sensory sensitivity: The real impact of smells, sounds, and environment

[12:00] – Practical examples: Why 20 questions on a test might trigger a meltdown

[14:00] – Personal school story: Being accelerated without emotional preparation

[16:00] – The hidden trauma of chronic stress, boredom, or masking

[18:00] – Supporting your child: Let them voice how they feel about being brushed off

[19:00] – Creating safe spaces where “too much” is celebrated

[21:00] – Teaching the concept of the emotional and behavioral “dial”

[22:00] – Self-awareness vs. self-rejection: Supporting authenticity with boundaries

[24:00] – Helping kids find their people and communities where they belong

[26:00] – Mourning what we thought parenting would look like—and leaning into who our child really is

[28:00] – Social struggles and executive functioning: What’s really going on

[29:00] – Teaching perception, inhibition, and emotional regulation without shutting kids down

[30:00] – Recap & how the Support Circle can help

Resources Mentioned

Book a 30-Minute Call with Andi – Get your questions answered and explore next steps: Book here: https://tidycal.com/andi1/bookacall