Summary
Caleb and Kyumin, both former missionary kids, sit down with filmmaker Ari Ali, creator of Ben Between Africa. Ari tells the story of trying tounderstand her mother’s MK experience and what that journey opened up insidetheir family. We talk about love, calling, silence, and what it takes to startreal conversations at home. This episode is for MKs, parents, and anyonecurious about the long arc of repair.
Why thismatters
MK stories often live in the gaps between what happened and what was ever said.Ari’s film gives language and shape to those gaps. This conversation exploreshow art can help families tell the truth, keep dignity, and stop passing painforward.
Topicswe cover
· What Ari set out to learn about her mom, andwhat surprised her
· How filming changed the way their family talksabout their past
· Boarding school, separation, and attachment
· The line between honoring a calling and naming acost
· What MK parents can do today to break cycles
· Practical steps for more authentic conversationsat home
Resourcesmentioned
· Ben BetweenAfrica (film): https://www.benbetweenafrica.com/
· The Missionary Kids: Unmasking the Myths ofWhite Evangelicalism (Book): https://www.broadleafbooks.com/store/product/9798889832034/The-Missionary-Kids
This episode centers on Rachel’s deeply personal story of survival, recovery, and breaking generational cycles of abuse within a fundamentalist missionary family. Rachel recounts growing up in a controlling religious environment, being sexually abused by her brother, and later manipulated by her father, a missionary who isolated her from her mother under false pretenses. Her story mirrors those of previous generations—her mother and grandmother suffered similar abuse and silencing within the church. Rachel’s eventual marriage to a pastor repeated these cycles of control, religious hypocrisy, and suppression of her voice. After years of emotional trauma and illness, she experiences a profound physical and spiritual reckoning, ultimately finding strength to leave her abusive marriage in 2022. With the help of a few trusted friends, she rebuilds her life, opening her first bank account at 39, reclaiming her autonomy, and beginning to help other women facing similar oppression. She reflects on the hypocrisy of religious systems that shield abusers and silence victims, contrasting these with her rediscovery of authentic faith and community. The metaphor of the “Phoenix” recurs throughout her story—a symbol of rebirth, healing, and empowerment.
The podcast hosts emphasize the need for systemic accountability in the church and celebrate Rachel’s courage as an act of collective liberation.
Key takeaways include the intergenerational impact of trauma, the psychological and physical toll of silence, the power of truth-telling, and the transformative potential of supportive relationships.
Go family!
Go Vanguards