Have you been feeling ready to start a new chapter in life, but also unsure how to begin? Not because everything is falling apart, but because something inside you knows it’s time for more. In this classic episode of the Love, Happiness and Success Podcast, I’m joined by my colleague Dr. Lisa Severy to talk about how rewriting your story can open the door to real, lasting change—in your career, your relationships, and the way you see yourself. Dr. Lisa specializes in narrative career counseling, a powerful approach that helps people understand the deeper life themes shaping their choices. We talk about why traditional career advice often misses the mark, how work and identity are deeply connected, and what it really takes to move forward when you feel stuck, restless, or quietly dissatisfied—even if your life looks “fine” from the outside. This conversation is for you if you’re sensing that a new beginning is calling, but you don’t want to jump into another situation that looks different yet feels the same. Together, we explore how insight comes before action, why patterns tend to repeat when the internal story doesn’t change, and how giving yourself permission to rewrite old narratives can be one of the most meaningful decisions you ever make. Episode Breakdown: 00:00 How to start a new chapter in life by rewriting your story 02:27 Meet Dr. Lisa Severy and the narrative approach to career change 06:18 Why traditional career counseling doesn’t work for real life change 11:14 Life themes, meaning, and choosing work that fits who you are 19:30 The emotional cost of staying comfortable but unfulfilled at work 23:30 What to do when you feel stuck and overwhelmed by options 29:24 Giving yourself permission to change and release old “shoulds” 35:27 The Great Resignation and reclaiming agency in your career 41:57 Why career patterns repeat when the internal story doesn’t change 47:54 A powerful exercise to clarify what’s missing in your next chapter 52:58 Final reflections and how to get support for your next chapter I want you to know that you don’t have to figure your next chapter out on your own. One of the ways I support people at this point is by inviting them to schedule a free consultation with me or a member of my Growing Self team. It’s a private, secure space where you can talk honestly about what’s been feeling stuck, what’s been weighing on you, and what you hope might feel different going forward. You’ll answer just three quick questions, and we’ll help match you with the right counselor or coach for where you are right now. I hope you’ll see this as a small but meaningful gift to yourself as you begin shaping what comes next. xoxo, Dr. Lisa Marie BobbyGrowing Self

Is anger, regret or sadness still tying you to your past? In this episode, you’ll learn how finding forgiveness helps you heal unhealthy emotions, create closure, and move on. You’ll learn about the two types of forgiveness and how to shift your mindset so you can finally feel happier, freer, and more like yourself again. If happiness and well-being feel out of reach right now, I hope you dive into this one. Forgiveness often sounds simple, but it can feel deeply challenging when anger, regret, or unresolved pain linger. I’m revisiting this episode because these unhealthy feelings tend to hold on quietly, shaping how we feel long after the moment has passed. In this conversation, I talk about what forgiveness really is and what it is not, and how finding forgiveness can support healing and closure without excusing harm or abandoning your boundaries. We explore the difference between forgiving yourself and forgiving someone else, especially when there has been no apology, no repair, or no justice. You’ll hear how to work with difficult emotions like sadness and resentment, how to move on when the other person may never change, and how forgiveness can support your growth, well-being, and peace of mind. If part of you feels like you should be over it by now, but something still feels unfinished, this episode offers a more compassionate way forward. Forgiveness is not about forgetting or minimizing what happened. It’s about releasing what no longer serves you so you can heal and feel happier in your life today. Episode Breakdown: 00:00 Finding Forgiveness and Emotional Healing 03:25 The Two Types of Forgiveness: Yourself and Others 05:52 How Anger, Regret, and Guilt Impact Happiness 07:56 Self-Forgiveness Through Compassion and Growth 15:00 Making Amends and Repairing Harm 21:59 How to Forgive Someone Who Isn’t Sorry 24:19 Letting Go Without Excusing Harm 28:56 Forgiveness, Boundaries, and Emotional Safety 31:19 Choosing Forgiveness to Move On and Feel at Peace If this conversation about finding forgiveness stirred something tender for you, I want you to know you don’t have to work through it alone. I’d love for you to schedule a free consultation with me or someone on my team at Growing Self. It’s a private, secure space to share what you’ve been carrying and get matched with the right counselor or coach for where you are right now. You’ll answer three quick questions, and we’ll help you take a thoughtful next step toward healing and clarity. xoxo, Dr. Lisa Marie BobbyGrowing Self

Most people don’t realize they’re running on autopilot until life forces them to stop. Through the lens of ‘Memento Mori’, this episode shows you how living for meaning can help you find direction, improve your overall well-being, and create a purpose-driven life. You’ll learn how to use this mindset shift to support your self improvement, reduce your stress, and cultivate happiness right now. I’m joined by Karen Salmansohn, author and mindset coach, for a conversation about living for meaning and finding direction through the lens of Memento Mori. I’m revisiting this episode because its message feels especially relevant right now - how to reduce stress, stay grounded in your mindset, and create a purpose-driven life without giving up your ambition or drive. Rather than being morbid, the Memento Mori mindset offers clarity. It brings you back into the present moment and helps you make more intentional choices about who you are becoming and what truly matters. Together, we explore why traditional to-do lists often leave people feeling busy but unfulfilled, and how shifting toward values-based, identity-driven habits can support greater happiness and emotional well-being. This episode is an invitation to step out of autopilot, reconnect with what matters most, and begin living with more intention starting exactly where you are. As you listen, I invite you to reflect on this question: If your time is limited, what deserves more of your attention right now? Episode Breakdown: 00:00 Welcome to Love, Happiness & Success 00:48 The “funeral question” and how it helps you live with meaning 01:19 Memento Mori and using mortality awareness to find direction 05:29 Karen’s wake-up call and the origin of Your To Die For Life 09:13 “Everything that is not given is lost” and the meaning of legacy 14:22 Aristotle on happiness vs pleasure and building a purpose-driven life 21:08 The to-die list, core values, and identity-based habits 30:22 Karen’s seven core values and intentional daily choices 38:28 Mortality marbles and a mindset shift that reduces stress 46:31 Dr. Lisa’s 9/11 story and choosing a more intentional life If this gives you a desire for more meaning, more clarity, or a different relationship with stress, I want to offer you something supportive. You’re invited to schedule a free consultation with me or a trusted member of my team. This is a private, secure space to talk about what’s been weighing on you, what you want to feel differently, and what kind of support would truly help you move forward. You’ll answer just a few quick questions so we can thoughtfully match you with the right counselor or coach and help you take the next step toward a more intentional, purpose-driven life. xoxo, Dr. Lisa Marie BobbyGrowing Self

If you’ve been hearing more about psychedelic therapy and wondering whether it’s a genuine breakthrough for healing—or just the latest mental health trend—you’re not alone. Many people feel curious, hopeful, and skeptical all at once. This conversation is meant to help you slow down, understand what the research actually shows, and think clearly about whether this path is right for you. In this episode of Love, Happiness and Success, I’m joined by psychiatrist and MDMA-assisted psychotherapist Dr. Scott Shannon, founder of Wholeness Center, the largest integrative mental health center in the U.S. Together, we talk about how psychedelic therapy works differently from conventional psychiatric treatment, why it can help disrupt rigid trauma patterns in the brain, and what researchers are learning about long-term healing—not just short-term symptom relief. We also spend time on the parts of this conversation that matter just as much: the risks, the ethical boundaries, and the importance of preparation, professional support, and integration. Psychedelic therapy isn’t appropriate for everyone, and it isn’t something to pursue casually or without careful guidance. This episode offers a grounded, responsible look at how people can think critically about safety, readiness, and what to look for in a qualified provider. As you listen, I invite you to reflect on a few questions: What kind of healing are you actually looking for? What does feeling “better” really mean to you? And how do you decide which growth paths deserve your trust, time, and care? Episode Breakdown: 00:00 Psychedelic therapy explained: promise, research, and real risks 02:31 Why psychedelic therapy differs from traditional psychiatric medication 04:55 Trauma, brain patterns, and how psychedelic therapy disrupts stuck loops 07:00 MDMA-assisted therapy for PTSD and why healing can continue long after treatment 12:21 A paradigm shift in mental health: supporting the brain’s capacity to heal 19:30 What MDMA actually does in therapy: safety, self-compassion, and trauma processing 25:47 Mystical experience, meaning, and the spiritual dimension of psychedelic therapy 30:09 Ethical concerns, safety risks, and how to evaluate psychedelic therapy providers 38:00 Preparation and integration: why psychedelic therapy is more than the experience itself If this conversation leaves you thinking about your own healing or growth, I want to be clear that Growing Self does not offer psychedelic therapy. What we do offer is thoughtful, evidence-based therapy and coaching for people who want to grow with intention and care. If you’d like, I’d love to help you think through what kind of support would actually be most helpful for you. I’ve created a simple, private way to do that. By answering just a few quick questions, we can help match you with the right therapist or coach for a complimentary consultation—someone who understands what you’re navigating and where you’d like to go next. Schedule a free consultation today. Consider it a small gift from me, and a gentle next step if you’re ready for one. xoxo, Dr. Lisa Marie BobbyGrowing Self

You’re speaking... they’re nodding… and yet somehow, the disconnect lingers. Western culture teaches us that communicating more clearly will fix the problems in our relationships, but what if the missing piece isn’t “more talking” at all? What if learning how to listen differently is what actually changes everything? When we understand how to listen in a deeper, more intentional way, communication problems soften, conflict and repair become easier, and emotional intimacy has room to grow. In this episode, I’m joined by Dr. Haru Yamada, a sociolinguistics researcher, writer, and author of Kiku: The Japanese Art of Good Listening. Haru holds a PhD from Georgetown University and has spent her life studying language, culture, and communication across borders. Having grown up moving between countries and cultures, her work centers on listening as a relational skill and a form of intelligence that supports both emotional and physical health. She now lives in London with her French partner in a multicultural family where listening is essential. Together, we explore what the Japanese art of listening teaches us about how to listen in relationships. We talk about why hearing words is not the same as being understood, how tone, silence, pacing, and emotional awareness shape connection, and why so many couples feel unseen even when conversations sound productive on the surface. This conversation offers a reframe for anyone who wants to be a better listener and communicate with more care, clarity, and compassion. If you’ve ever wondered how to listen in a way that actually helps your partner feel safe and understood, this episode offers listening skills you can start using right away. These are skills that support conflict and repair, strengthen emotional intimacy, and help couples move out of stuck communication patterns and into real connection. As you listen, I invite you to reflect on these questions: Where might you be listening for information, when what your partner really needs is to be listened to as a person? And how might your relationships change if feeling heard became the goal, not winning the conversation? Episode Breakdown: 00:00 Why Communication Problems Persist in Relationships 01:02 The Japanese Art of Listening and How It Changes Relationships 02:56 Speaking vs Listening: Who Is Responsible for Understanding? 05:18 How Listening Impacts Relational Health and Healing 08:35 “Kiku” and Listening With 14 Hearts: Hearing Information vs Hearing a Person 16:10 Listening Skills That Build Emotional Intimacy 19:31 Why Conflict Happens When We Don’t Feel Heard 25:17 How Expectations Shape What We Hear 28:50 How to Be a Good Listener in Love and Relationships 35:27 Staying Present: The Hardest and Most Important Listening Skill 40:19 Listening as Care: How Being Heard Supports Healing and Repair If you’d like support as you practice listening differently and creating more understanding in your relationships, I’d love to help you find the right next step. I’ve created a simple, private way for you to connect with the support that fits you best. You can answer a few quick questions, and we’ll help you schedule a free consultation with the right counselor or coach on my team. It’s a quiet, pressure-free space to talk about what’s really been happening in your relationships and what you want to feel differently moving forward. xoxo, Dr. Lisa Marie BobbyGrowing Self

What if the key to success and happiness isn’t working harder, but finally understanding how you’re wired to thrive? Many people unknowingly work against their own strengths and personality, leading to stress, stalled career growth, and strained relationships. In this episode, you’ll learn how to uncover obstacles, unlock your personal greatness, and start living in your type of working genius. Burnout doesn’t always come from doing too much. Often, it comes from spending too much time doing the kind of work that drains you. Patrick Lencioni and I talk about why stress, frustration, and self-criticism are frequent signals of misalignment rather than failure, and how understanding your natural skills can change the way you work, lead, and relate to the people you love. Patrick is the creator of the Working Genius assessment and author of The Six Types of Working Genius. Together, we explore how the Working Genius framework helps people understand their strengths, release shame around what feels hard, and create healthier relationships at work and at home. We also talk about why rest alone doesn’t resolve burnout, and why doing more of the right kind of work often restores energy, confidence, and momentum. As you listen, you may find yourself reconsidering long-held beliefs about success, productivity, and what you “should” be good at, and noticing where clarity could replace stress. Episode Breakdown: 00:00 Feeling Burned Out and Self-Critical at Work and Home 05:06 Burnout as Working Outside Your Strengths 06:56 The 6 Types of Working Genius Explained 11:45 How Working Genius Differences Affect Relationships 17:50 Enablement and Tenacity as Essential Strengths 21:08 Shame, Comparison, and Misunderstood Skills 32:41 Using Working Genius to Improve Couples and Team Communication 41:34 Why Doing Less Does Not Fix Burnout 55:35 Moving Toward Career Alignment Without Major Life Changes Are you feeling stretched thin while trying to crush it at work and keep up with everything at home? Burnout might be looming and that isn’t just because you’re doing too much. It’s often about doing the wrong kind of work. Patrick created the Working Genius assessment to help you discover what kind of work gives you energy and what drains it. It’s helped me find more balance, not by doing less, but by focusing on what I’m actually wired for. If you’re a CEO, entrepreneur, or anyone trying to level up in business and life, take the Working Genius assessment today and get 20% off with code LHS at https://www.workinggenius.com/  xoxo, Dr. Lisa Marie BobbyGrowing Self

What’s the secret to a marriage full of love, happiness, and success? Happy, thriving couples know that achieving your couple goals—and treating growth like a shared adventure—is what creates deep connection and long-term happiness. In this episode, you’ll learn how to uncover obstacles in relationships, communicate proactively, deepen emotional intimacy, and strengthen your bond through intentional, growth-focused love. So many couples set goals for their careers, finances, or personal growth, but rarely pause to ask: What are we working toward together? I’m revisiting this episode because the conversation feels just as relevant now as when it first aired. Joined by licensed marriage and family therapist and relationship coach Sarah B., we talk about how couples can take a proactive, growth-focused approach to building a strong, connected marriage—long before problems turn into crises. We explore why emotional awareness and communication skills are often missing from our early relationship education, and how that gap quietly creates distance over time. You’ll hear practical ways couples can clarify shared goals, stay connected through busy seasons of life, and create emotional safety around some of the most sensitive topics in a marriage, including communication, intimacy, sex, and money. As you listen, I invite you to reflect on this question: If your relationship mattered just as much as every other goal in your life, what would you start doing differently together? Episode Breakdown: 00:00 Achieving Your Couple Goals: Love, Happiness, and Success in a Marriage 00:44 Designing Your Shared Future Together 05:48 Uncover Obstacles in Relationships Before Crisis Hits 09:31 Be Willing to Be Messy: The Mindset That Builds Emotional Intimacy 15:41 The Relationship Check-In That Helps Couples Communicate Proactively 19:17 The “Powerball” Exercise to Clarify Couple Goals and Values 22:45 Quality Time That Actually Feels Connecting 30:10 Communicate Proactively: Naming Needs Before You Get Triggered 32:13 Empathy and Boundaries When Conversations Escalate 40:04 Sex and Money: Emotional Safety and Radical Honesty If you’re thinking about what you want for your relationship moving forward, I’d love to offer you a gentle next step. As a listener of the podcast, this is my way of inviting you into a more supported, intentional process. You can answer three quick questions to help us understand what’s feeling most important in your relationship right now and what kind of support would be the best fit. It’s private, secure, and only takes a couple of minutes. From there, we’ll help you schedule a free consultation with the right expert—someone who can support you in clarifying your couple goals, strengthening emotional intimacy, and building a relationship grounded in love, happiness, and success. xoxo, Dr. Lisa Marie BobbyGrowing Self

Do you ever find yourself longing for deeper human connection, yet unsure how to actually make it happen? So many people are trying to overcome loneliness while craving friendships that genuinely support their happiness, well-being, and the desire to grow and heal. In this episode, we explore what strengthens your social wellness - from simple practices that help you reconnect with yourself to meaningful experiences that help you feel happier. My guest today is Julia Hotz, a solutions-focused journalist and award-winning author of The Connection Cure. Julia has spent years studying why loneliness is so widespread, what it does to our bodies and minds, and why meaningful relationships feel harder to build than ever. Today, we discuss social prescribing - an emerging practice where doctors and therapists “prescribe” activities like art classes, forest walks, or book clubs based on what matters to you most. These aren’t hobbies for the sake of hobbies; they’re structured ways of reconnecting with joy, identity, and people who help you feel more like yourself. Julia shares powerful stories, including Glenn, a 92-year-old veteran who went from weeks of silence to a real friendship, and Jonas, who lives with social anxiety and found that culture, music, and stories were his bridge back to connection. We talk about why meaningful relationships aren’t just about companionship but self-expansion, helping you understand who you are through the people you connect with. We also explore the internal obstacles that make it harder to overcome loneliness: time constraints, social anxiety, and the awkwardness many people still feel after years of disrupted connection. Episode Breakdown: 00:00 Why social connection and strong relationships boost health and happiness 00:40 Introducing Julia Hotz and The Connection Cure 01:11 How the UK’s minister of loneliness sparked social prescribing 06:47 What loneliness really is and how it impacts your brain and body 10:26 Self-expansion: how deep relationships help you know yourself 12:28 Rebuilding community: from Bowling Alone to modern social prescribing 14:21 Glenn and Ryan’s story: loneliness to friendship at age 92 18:05 Social anxiety and culture “vitamins”: easier ways to meet people 23:20 How people connect differently: activities, intimacy, and friendship 26:18 Flipping “What’s wrong with me?” to “What matters to me?” 31:14 Why 20 minutes in nature can reset your mind and attention 38:35 How to “prescribe yourself” connection and build a values-based social life If something in this episode resonates and you’re thinking, “I don’t want to feel this alone anymore,” we would love to support you. At Growing Self, you can schedule a free consultation to get connected with a therapist or coach on my team who truly understands what it takes to overcome loneliness and build meaningful human connection. You’ll be able to chat with someone who can walk alongside you as you strengthen your social wellness, rebuild friendships, and feel happier. Schedule a free consultation today. You are worthy of relationships where you feel seen, chosen, and emotionally safe. You don’t have to figure this out alone. 💗 xoxo, Dr. Lisa Marie BobbyGrowing Self

If overwhelm has become your constant companion - the thing you wake up with, carry through your day, and fall asleep thinking about - your well-being is trying to tell you something. In this episode, we’re unpacking why happiness can feel so far away when stress keeps running the show, and how you can manage what’s on your plate without sacrificing yourself in the process. If you’re longing to feel happier, love yourself more deeply, and finally declutter the parts of your life that feel too heavy, you are absolutely in the right place! My guest, author and Afro-minimalist Christine Platt (Less Is Liberation: Finding Freedom From a Life of Overwhelm), shares how her “normal” busy life quietly turned into a health crisis, and how she began seeing overwhelm as her body’s way of saying, Hey, one of your wells is empty. We talk about the five foundations of wellness (your “personal wells”), the emotional labor and mental load so many women carry, and how learning to declutter your stuff, your schedule, and your beliefs can help you manage stress more wisely and reconnect with a sense of happiness in your daily life. We also get into the messy real-world pieces: overwhelm by circumstance (divorce, money, kids, career), people-pleasing, the guilt around saying no, and why so many of us overbuy and hang onto clutter “just in case.” As you listen, notice: Which of your wells has been running low? What are you still trying to prove by doing so much? And what would “less” need to look like for your life to feel more like your life again? Episode Breakdown: 00:00 Constant Overwhelm and Stress: What Your Body Is Trying to Tell You 03:03 Chronic Overwhelm and Hypertension: When Stress Becomes a Health Crisis 05:51 Five Foundations of Wellness: The “Personal Wells” Framework 09:45 Emotional Labor and Mental Load: Why Women Feel So Overwhelmed 12:30 Minimalism as Liberation: Living With Less to Reduce Overwhelm 16:06 Time Scarcity and Productivity: Limiting Beliefs That Keep You Overwhelmed 18:29 Messengers and Limiting Beliefs: Redefining “Selfish” Self-Care 25:32 Overwhelmed by Circumstance: Divorce, Scarcity, and Minimalism by Necessity 32:26 Psychology of Ownership: Why We Overbuy, Hoard, and Accumulate Clutter 42:51 Inner Work Before Decluttering: Healing People-Pleasing and Attachment to Stuff 48:47 Filling Your Wells: Daily Practices for Sustainable Wellness and Well-Being If you’re living in that constant state of overwhelm, please know you don’t have to sort this out on your own. At Growing Self, you can talk with someone about what’s really happening - the stress, the burnout, the clutter on the outside and the inside - and get matched with a therapist or coach who truly understands what you’re carrying. Schedule a consultation today! You deserve a life that feels lighter and more intentional, where you can manage stress wisely, feel happier in your day-to-day reality, and genuinely love yourself in how you care for your time, your space, and your emotional well-being. 💗 xoxo, Dr. Lisa Marie BobbyGrowing Self

Wondering if your mother-in-law is just “a lot,” or if you’re actually dealing with a truly toxic mother-in-law situation? You are so not the only one lying awake replaying her comments and wondering what to do when this relationship feels way too involved in your marriage and family. In this episode, we’re talking about how a toxic mother-in-law dynamic starts to erode your sense of safety at home. Dr. Tracy Dalgleish - clinical psychologist, couples therapist, and author of You, Your Husband and His Mother - joins me to talk honestly about what happens when your partner is still emotionally tied to his mom, you’re trying to build a healthy new family, and you keep getting caught in the middle. We look at why some moms struggle to let go, why so many women end up over-functioning for everyone, and why so many men freeze or minimize when it’s time to set boundaries with a toxic mother-in-law… and then we talk about what you can do: becoming a united “vault” as a couple, setting real boundaries instead of endless “requests,” and getting clear on your options when the dynamic with your mother-in-law is starting to feel unbearable. Here’s how we walk through it together: 00:00 Why Mother-in-Law Conflicts Hurt Communication and Connection 03:14 Dr. Tracy’s Story and Why She Wrote “You, Your Husband and His Mother” 05:24 Mother–Son Bonds, Gender Roles, and the Roots of Toxic Mother-in-Law Dynamics 11:03 Unhealthy Family Patterns: Control, Enmeshment, and Emotional Caretaking of Mom 20:56 Overfunctioning Wives, Underfunctioning Husbands, and the Mother–Child Dynamic 24:39 The VAULT Method: Becoming a United Couple and Setting Boundaries with In-Laws 30:48 Requests vs Boundaries: What Really Works with a Toxic Mother-in-Law 51:41 Change, Accept, or Leave: Your Choices in a Toxic Mother-in-Law Situation If this stirs up a very specific conversation with your partner (or a replay of your last holiday with his mom) and your chest tightens a little, I have something for exactly that moment. My Communication That Connects training walks you through the evidence-based do’s and don’ts of communication that actually creates understanding instead of more defensiveness and hurt. I’ll help you get clear about the real issues under your fights, give you a framework you can start using right away with your partner, and walk you step-by-step through how to have hard conversations in a way that protects your emotional bond instead of tearing it down. And if you’re at the point where you’re thinking, “I don’t want to keep holding this all together by myself,” I would be genuinely honored to support you more directly. At Growing Self, you can privately tell us what’s going on with your marriage, your mother-in-law, your family, and we’ll help you connect with the right therapist or coach on my team. It’s a simple, secure way to raise your hand and say, “Here’s what I’m struggling with, please point me to the right person.” You can start that process anytime by scheduling a consultation. You deserve a family life that feels safe, sane, and loving, even if your extended family is… a lot. 💗 xoxo, Dr. Lisa Marie BobbyGrowing Self

If your relationship is stuck in a painful communication breakdown, I want you to know you’re not crazy and you’re not alone. In this episode, I’m sharing how the right solution-focused therapy techniques can start shifting the energy between you, even if things feel really bad right now. I’m joined by solution-focused brief psychotherapist and author of Change Your Questions, Change Your Future, Elliott Connie, and we’re talking about why endlessly analyzing what went wrong rarely creates the change you’re craving. Instead, we look at how hope, better questions, and small, intentional acts of love can reopen doors that you were pretty sure were slammed shut: from a “hopeless” divorced couple who ended up with ten beautiful years of remarried life, to the quiet experiment of really studying your partner and giving them more of what you know makes them feel loved. Along the way, we wrestle with the hard stuff too: blame, “I’m the victim here,” boundaries vs. checking out, and whether you’re people-pleasing or simply showing up as the kind of partner you want to be. As you listen, I’d love for you to ask yourself: If hope came back into this relationship, what would actually be different between us? And who do I want to be in that story? Episode Breakdown: 00:00 Why Relationships Really Fail: Losing Hope, Not Love 01:19 Solution-Focused Therapy vs Traditional Couples Counseling 06:03 Insight vs Healing: Why Understanding the Problem Won’t Fix Your Relationship 10:48 How Hope Heals Relationships: The Most Important Ingredient in Change 15:36 Court-Ordered Co-Parents to Remarried: Elliot Connie’s “Finding Nemo” Case Study 22:19 Ending the Blame Game: Taking Personal Responsibility in Marriage Conflicts 27:09 Try This Tonight: Small Acts of Love That Rebuild Emotional Connection 32:02 Is Your Partner Reciprocating? How to Read the Signs and What to Do Next 34:23 Change Your Questions, Change Your Future in Love and Relationships 36:51 Making Your Partner’s Happiness Your Job Without Losing Yourself 41:35 People-Pleasing, Boundaries, and Knowing When a Relationship Is Unhealthy 44:54 How to Get More Help for Your Relationship and Personal Growth If this conversation is bringing a particular argument or painful cycle to mind and you can feel your body tense up at the thought of talking about it, I created something to walk alongside you. My Communication That Connects training is where I take you deeper into the heart of this work: the real issues that drive conflict, the evidence-based do’s and don’ts of communication that creates connection instead of distance, and a clear framework you can start using with your partner right away.  And if you’re at the point where you’re thinking, “We cannot keep doing this by ourselves,” I would be truly honored to support you more directly. At Growing Self, you can tell us what’s going on, what you’ve already tried, and what you’re hoping for, and we’ll thoughtfully connect you with the right therapist or coach on my team. It’s a private, secure way to say, “Here’s what I’m struggling with,” and get matched with someone who can walk through this with you, step by step. You can begin that process by scheduling a consultation. You deserve a relationship where hard conversations are survivable, you feel heard and cherished, and love feels like a safe place to land. 💗 xoxo, Dr. Lisa Marie BobbyGrowing Self

If you’ve ever told yourself, “I’ll finally relax when my relationship is better, my house is cleaner, my body looks different, my career is farther along,” this conversation is for you and me both. As we step into the holiday season - a time that invites reflection, gratitude, and sometimes a little extra pressure - I’m revisiting this episode because the message is timeless. We’re talking about cultivating contentment in the life you actually have, not some upgraded future version of it, and how to feel more at peace inside yourself without giving up your dreams, your drive, or your big, beautiful goals. We’ll look at the difference between quick hits of happiness and that steadier “all is well in my world” feeling, the paradox of being an ambitious human who also wants to enjoy today, and some very practical ways to take inventory of your life, question old beliefs about worth and achievement, and stop outsourcing your emotional climate to your circumstances. As you listen, I’d love for you to consider: What have you been making your happiness conditional on? And what might change if today, messy and imperfect as it is, actually counted as a good life? Episode Breakdown: 00:00 Introduction to Contentment 04:24 The Pursuit of Happiness vs. Contentment 10:56 Understanding Contentment 20:36 The Paradox of Growth and Contentment 22:29 Taking Inventory for Contentment 29:17 Exploring Core Beliefs and Values 32:55 The Impact of Negative Thinking 37:10 Contentment and Happiness 40:37 The Illusion of Circumstantial Happiness 46:20 The Journey of Personal Growth 52:32 Finding Joy in the Process of Life If you’re noticing how long you’ve been living in “when things are different, then I’ll be okay,” and you’d like a thoughtful partner while you practice something healthier, I’d love to connect with you. You can schedule a consultation with me or a member of my team; it’s a private, secure space where you can tell us what’s really been going on in your world and what you’re hoping will feel different. We’ll help you get matched with the right counselor or coach so you can feel more grounded, more understood, and more free to enjoy the life you’re in while you grow into what’s next. 💗 xoxo, Dr. Lisa Marie BobbyGrowing Self

This time of year brings a lot of togetherness… and with it, a lot of unspoken tension. Difficult conversations are the ones you rehearse in your mind or hold back during holiday dinners, worried that saying the wrong thing could create a rift you can’t repair. That’s why I’m re-releasing this episode on how to have difficult conversations in a way that protects your relationship (and often deepens it) instead of pushing you further apart. We’ll talk about why we either avoid hard topics until resentment leaks out, or bring them up in a burst of anger and criticism, and how both patterns wear down trust over time. You’ll learn what it actually takes to do this differently: managing emotional flooding, getting honest with yourself before you speak, knowing when a conversation is worth having (and when it’s time to set a firm boundary), and shifting the goal from “winning” to mutual understanding so you can stay connected even when you don’t agree. Episode Breakdown: 00:00 Navigating Difficult Conversations 06:07 Emotional Intelligence & Self-Regulation 17:49 When to Set Boundaries and Walk Away 21:00 Growth Through Discomfort 27:05 Preparing for Hard Conversations 29:53 Seeing Through Others’ Eyes 36:08 Handling Polarized Views 42:09 Reciprocity & Healthy Relationships If this episode brings a specific conversation to mind and your stomach flips a little just thinking about it, I have a resource to support you. My Communication That Connects free training takes you deeper into the skills we cover here - practical do’s and don'ts for communication that creates understanding, plus real examples you can use with your partner right away. You’ll also receive a full workbook with lessons, activities, and homework to help you get to the root of conflict, calm reactive patterns, and build a more emotionally safe connection.  And if you’re at the point where you don’t want to keep doing this alone, I’d be honored to support you more directly. At Growing Self, you can tell us what’s going on in your life and relationships, and we’ll help you connect with the right therapist or coach on my team. It’s a simple, private way to say, “Here’s what I’m struggling with,” and get matched with someone who can walk through it with you. Start that process here: schedule a consultation. You deserve relationships where you can say the hard things, feel truly heard, and still feel loved at the end of the day. 💗 xoxo, Dr. Lisa Marie BobbyGrowing Self

AI has woven itself into our daily lives so quietly and so quickly that many of us don’t even realize how emotionally attached we’re becoming to it... and your AI chatbot might be destroying the way you connect & communicate in your relationships in real life. My guest, Dr. Rachel Wood, a licensed counselor with a PhD in cyberpsychology, helps us make sense of why AI feels so safe, so comforting, and in some cases so intimate, and what it means for our real relationships when a chatbot becomes the place we go to feel understood. We talk about the very real appeal of an AI companion that never gets tired, never gets defensive, and always seems to “get” you. And we also talk about the moments when that dynamic crosses into something unhealthy: when an omnibot becomes your therapist, your best friend, your partner, and your decision-maker… all at once. Rachel shares examples of how dependency forms, how delusions can develop, and why our relational and cognitive “muscles” matter more than ever in this new landscape. This conversation isn’t anti-AI. It’s about staying awake, staying human, and staying connected to ourselves and to each other while we navigate a technology that is becoming surprisingly personal. Episode Breakdown: 00:00 How AI Is Changing Human Relationships 09:20 The Spectrum of AI Relationships 20:18 Cognitive Offloading and Its Real-World Consequences 27:31 Using AI for Growth Without Losing Agency 32:59 When AI Becomes a Dependency 37:07 The Dangers of AI Escalation: A Suicidality Case Study 43:03 AI in Therapy: Tool or Replacement? 51:16 How to Support Someone Attached to Their AI If you’re listening to this and realizing you may be leaning on AI a little more than feels good, or maybe you’re worried about someone you love, please know you’re not alone. These are tender places, and they deserve real, caring support. If you’d like a safe space to sort through what’s coming up for you, or if you’re craving more connection and clarity in your relationships, I’d love to help you get started. You can schedule a consultation with me or someone on my team. Tell us what’s on your heart and what you’re hoping for. We’ll help you get matched with the right support so you can feel steady, understood, and empowered again. 💗 xoxo, Dr. Lisa Marie BobbyGrowing Self

The holiday season is so challenging when you’re dealing with relationship loss. That’s why I am re-releasing this episode on how to manage a breakup or divorce through the holiday season. This time of year can stir up old feelings, magnify loss, and make you question whether you’ll ever feel like yourself again - and that’s exactly why this conversation still matters. It can feel especially brutal when you’re going through a breakup over the holidays. Everyone else is in goofy sweaters and twinkle lights, and you’re just trying to get through the day without crying in the bathroom. In this episode, I’m talking with you about why you still feel hooked on your ex (even if you know the relationship needed to end), how love can function like an addiction in your brain, and why this season tends to rip everything wide open emotionally. I walk you through the stages of healing after a breakup - from that torturous ambivalence where part of you is still hoping, to the grief of finally letting go, to the anger, guilt, and self-doubt that can sneak up on you later - and then into rebuilding your self-esteem, finding some inner peace, and eventually growing into a wiser, stronger version of yourself. As you listen, I want you to be gently asking yourself, Where am I in this process? What do I actually need right now: space, support, boundaries, or a little nudge back into life? Episode Breakdown: 00:00 Coping with Loss During the Holidays 10:15 Understanding the Emotional Impact of Breakups 16:33 Navigating the Stages of Healing 18:34 The Ambivalence Stage: Letting Go 22:15 Emotional Freedom: Grieving and Moving On 28:01 Rebuilding Self-Esteem After a Breakup 31:15 Finding Inner Peace and Moving Forward 34:29 Growth: Learning from the Experience If you’re listening to this and thinking, I can’t do this by myself anymore, I would be truly honored to support you. You can schedule a consultation with me or a member of my team. It’s a private, secure place to tell us what’s been going on for you - the grief, the intrusive thoughts about your ex, the way the holidays are stirring everything back up - and we’ll help you get matched with the right expert so you don’t have to figure this out alone. Thousands of people have used this first step to begin healing their hearts and rebuilding their lives, and you can too. If your heart is saying, I’m ready for some real support, consider this my personal invitation to reach out. 💗 xoxo, Dr. Lisa Marie BobbyGrowing Self

Let’s get honest for a second. Porn addiction isn’t really about sex. It’s about connection… about loneliness, shame, and the ache to feel close to something when life feels empty or overwhelming. My guest for this episode, Sathiya Sam, knows that pain deeply. After a 15-year struggle with porn addiction, he rebuilt his life and now helps others do the same through his Deep Clean program - a compassionate, science-meets-spirituality approach that helps people stop using porn and start building real connection again. We’re talking about what really drives addiction, the role of purpose and community in recovery, how to protect kids in this new digital world, and what AI “relationships” mean for the future of intimacy. It’s a deep, human conversation about healing, hope, and the real work of reclaiming yourself. Episode Breakdown: 00:00 Porn Addiction Is About Connection, Not Willpower 01:17 Sathiya Sam’s Recovery Story and Deep Clean Method 07:21 Purpose, Boredom, and the Root Causes of Porn Use 13:44 Protecting Kids From Early Exposure 18:24 AI, Loneliness, and Synthetic Intimacy 30:11 Healing Through Community and Real Connection 34:32 Why Your Partner Shouldn’t Be Your Accountability Partner 39:34 First Steps to Quit Porn for Good Sometimes the hardest part is admitting you need a little help, and the bravest thing you can do is take that first step. If you’re ready to start your own growth and healing journey, you can get support from Sathiya here: https://www.sathiyasam.com/growing-self. Let them know Dr. Lisa sent you! ❤️ You don’t have to carry this by yourself. Real change is possible… and it starts with connection. xoxo, Dr. Lisa Marie BobbyGrowing Self P.S. I’d also love to hear what resonated for you or what ideas you’d like me to explore next. Let’s keep the conversation going!

What if the guilt you’ve been trying to shake is a guiding light for better relationships? We spend so much energy trying not to feel guilty, about losing our temper, missing a call, falling short in some way, but guilt isn’t proof that you’re broken. It’s proof that you care. In this episode, I talk with psychologist Dr. Chris Moore about how guilt can actually help you heal your relationships, reconnect with your empathy, and live in alignment with your values. Here’s a peek at what we cover: 00:00 Guilt Is Good: Why Feeling Guilty Can Heal Relationships 01:54 The Guilt Cocktail: Empathy, Anxiety, and Self-Anger 08:24 Guilt vs. Shame: How to Tell the Difference 13:43 Turning Guilt Into Repair: Apology and Forgiveness 16:48 When You Can’t Fix It: Guilt, Grief, and Self-Forgiveness 23:27 Moral Injury, Trauma, and Survivor Guilt 28:37 Chronic Guilt: Why Women Feel It More 33:12 How to Reframe Guilt and Use It as a Guide 41:13 Guilt Means You Care If something in this conversation stirred your heart, maybe an old regret or a relationship you’d love to mend, you don’t have to sort through it alone. You can schedule a consultation with me or a member of my team at Growing Self. It’s a warm, private space to talk about what’s been weighing on you, get help managing guilt in a healthy way, and start moving forward with self-forgiveness and clarity. xoxo, Dr. Lisa Marie BobbyGrowing Self

Have you ever said yes when every part of you was quietly screaming no? Or pushed through your day on fumes, wondering where your energy went? We’ve all been there - doing a million things that look productive but leave us totally drained. In this episode, I’m talking with psychologist and author Dr. Diana Hill about how to reclaim your energy and focus by using them wisely. Diana’s new book, Wise Effort: How to Focus Your Genius Energy on What Matters Most, is about learning to tell the difference between what fuels you and what quietly burns you out. We get into how to recognize “unwise effort” - those moments when you’re forcing, overdoing, or holding on too tight - and how to reconnect with your genius energy, that natural flow that feels effortless and alive. She also shares simple ways to check in with yourself: a 24-hour “regret scan” to see where your energy went off-track, and four questions to help you decide what’s actually worth your time, attention, and heart. It’s all about being intentional, not perfect, and remembering that the most powerful thing you can do is choose where your energy goes. As you listen, notice where your energy feels pulled, and what choices leave you feeling lighter, freer, more yourself. What are you still holding on to that’s quietly exhausting you? And what would it look like to let that go? Episode Breakdown: 00:00 What Is Wise Effort and Why Energy Matters 02:50 Three Patterns That Drain Your Energy 07:04 Finding Your Genius Energy 11:04 Regret as a Compass for Wise Energy 22:00 The Four-Question Filter for Wise Decisions 29:39 How Relationships Affect Your Energy 42:30 Reclaiming Energy and Focus Through Wise Effort If you’ve been feeling scattered or depleted, this may be your moment to pause and realign. Working with one of our expert therapists or coaches can help you understand where your energy and focus are going - and guide you toward choices that feel more grounded, intentional, and restorative. Schedule your free consultation to start creating the balance you’ve been craving. xoxo, Dr. Lisa Marie BobbyGrowing Self

Have you ever asked yourself, “When does ‘my money’ become ‘our money’?” It’s one of those questions couples don’t really face until tension starts to build. And by then, it’s rarely about the dollars. It’s about fairness, power, and feeling seen. In this episode, I’m joined by Heather and Douglas Boneparth, the power couple behind Bone Fide Wealth Management, and co-authors of their new book, Money Together: How to Find Fairness in Your Relationship and Become an Unstoppable Financial Team. We talk about what really happens when love meets money - the unspoken expectations, the invisible labor, and the stories we tell ourselves about who’s “earning” more or contributing “enough.” Heather and Douglas share their own wake-up moment during the pandemic, when their careers and family roles shifted and resentment started creeping in. We explore what it means to honor each other’s time as a form of currency, how to rebuild balance when things feel uneven, and why fairness doesn’t always mean splitting everything 50/50. As you listen, think about what fairness looks like in your relationship. How do you value each other’s time, effort, and care? And what might change if you started talking about money as a shared story instead of a scoreboard? Episode Breakdown: 00:00 When Does My Money Become Our Money? 01:03 Why Couples Fight About Money 08:39 Time Is a Currency 15:29 From “Me” to “We” 21:24 Mistakes vs. Missteps 23:56 Different Definitions of “Enough” 28:12 “My Money” vs. “Our Money” 39:09 Practical Playbook: Money Dates & Goal Alignment 44:45 Case Study: Inheritance & Grief 51:03 When to Seek Financial Therapy for Couples There's a ton of great information in this podcast AND it’s also true that talking about money and creating agreement in your financial relationship can be very tricky for many couples. You don't have to go it alone. One of the things my practice is known for is financial therapy for couples, specifically. If this is a current pain point in your relationship, I hope you get in touch with us and allow us to guide you through the process of creating alignment around all parts of your life, including financials. Here’s the link to learn more, and set up a free consultation. xoxo, Dr. Lisa Marie BobbyGrowing Self

How much of what you do every day is really your choice? The food you crave, the shows you watch, the moods you slip into - so much of it is quietly being shaped by invisible influences you probably never notice. In this episode, I talk with Dr. Tatyana El-Kour, a psychologist and registered dietitian who studies how media and technology shape our behavior. She shares how algorithms learn our emotional rhythms - what time of day we’re vulnerable, what kind of content keeps us scrolling - and use that data to steer our choices. We also explore something just as powerful: the invisible influence inside us. Your gut microbiome doesn’t just affect digestion. It can shape your emotions, focus, and even your resilience. This conversation left me thinking deeply about how easily we’re guided by forces we can’t see and how much freedom comes from noticing them. Once you recognize what’s pulling the strings, you can start reclaiming your power, one intentional choice at a time. As you listen, ask yourself: When do I feel most on autopilot? What’s really driving my decisions in those moments? And what would it look like to start choosing differently? Episode Breakdown: 00:00 The Hidden Power of Invisible Influence 02:00 How Algorithms Shape Your Choices and Emotions 09:30 Emotional Tracking and Predictive Technology 13:30 When Digital Nudges Impact Health and Body Image 18:00 The Psychology Behind Algorithmic Addiction 29:00 Echo Chambers, Polarization, and Cognitive Rigidity 38:00 How to Recognize and Resist Invisible Influence 43:15 The Gut-Brain Connection and Emotional Resilience 55:00 Reclaiming Awareness and Agency If you’re curious about the invisible forces shaping your path, I made something to help you look beneath the surface. My What’s Holding You Back? Quiz is a short, thoughtful tool to help you see what might be standing between you and your next breakthrough. Think of it as a little mirror for your inner world - gentle, honest, and surprisingly clarifying. Connect with me on Instagram, Facebook, and YouTube. I share new insights (and sometimes a few behind-the-scenes thoughts) every week. And I’d really love to know what this episode stirred up for you. I always love hearing your takeaways so let’s talk! xoxo, Dr. Lisa Marie BobbyGrowing Self