Friedrich Merz has come up with a cunning plan to combat the AfD — but could it be the same plan centrist politicians been trying for the last 50 million fucking years? Meanwhile, one minister accidentally grows a conscience, and is immediately punished by his fellow Christian Democrats. But still, good news as Berlin's government is forced to prepare the city for climate disaster, and is it really too soon for Christmas markets? Happy happy jolly jolly, yeah!
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Recording in front of a live studio audience on October 17th 2025 at Podfest Berlin, Megan and Konrad are joined by not one but three special guests. Nessa Finnegan provides an update on the activities of the Irish Bloc, at least the ones who haven't been prosecuted or deported or punched by the police yet, energy transition expert Izzy Choksey explains all the profoundly sensible things the government is doing to save us from global heat death, and retired master-chef Basti Knight explains life at the mercy of Germany's unemployment bureaucracy. Keep it real, fam.
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The Megacanners return much chagrined this week, obliged as they are to retract last week's delusional good news. It turnsout that Merz's government is addicted to exporting arms into genocide zones after all. Still, there's slightly better news about dual nationality, thoroughly depressing news about unemployment benefit reforms, and devastating news for the great Berlin tradition of leaving boxes of random objects outside your front door. Plus, the unbeatable Japanese Suntory mega. Kanpai!
Come to our Podfest show next week!
Friday, October 17, 8:45pm, Studio Chérie, Hobrechtstraße 65, 12047 Berlin,
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A bewildering grab bag of news this week as Megan and Konrad whip through two weeks of German politics while staying heroically sober thanks to some cracking 0.0 Radler. Annalena Baerbock changes her tune at the UN, the AfD's Maximilian Krah makes the case for diversity in the workplace at the trial of his old friend and business partner the Chinese spy, Germany finally fills up its supreme court, and there's bad news for the teenage luch. O'Zapft is'!
Big Gaza solidarity demo in Berlin, Sept 27, here:
https://www.zusammen-fuer-gaza.de/
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A special episode this week, as the Megacanners are joined by journalist Wael Eskandar to talk about his journey from asking permission from the cops to buy an ice cream on Hermannplatz to watching them brutalize protesters with impunity on a weekly basis. Well done, Kai Wegner. — If only there was some kind of catastrophic lesson in German history to learn from to prevent this kind of thing. Prost!
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The Megacanners are back, and they're not the only ones. After a busy summer of trying to sound important in America, Friedrich Merz is back in Berlin to ring in his so-called autumn of reforms, by which he means cutting the welfare state and making poor people join the army. Meanwhile, Robert Habeck, not wishing to rattle his chains as a ghost in parliament anymore, takes a swipe at nemesis Markus Söder and his affinity for sausages before disappearing to California. See ya mate!
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First released on February 26, 2025!
It's the end of an era: Scholz, Habeck, and friend of the pod Christian Lindner have all had their last Absacker and stumbled out into the night — you can still hear them arguing in the distance in a cloud of mutual acrimony. Hey, we just let the market regulate itself, Christian! But spare a thought for Megan, who has to learn a whole new set of German politicians' names. At least Merz will be easy to remember (it rhymes with Schmerz). And there was good news too: Arch-splitter Sahra Wagenknecht took her heeby-jeeby energy into the wilderness — and Die Linke finally figured out how to set up a TikTok account and do a proper election campaign. Hooray!
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It's quiz week at Megacan Manor, as Megan welcomes her summer holidays by guessing some mildly interesting facts about Germany's demographic troubles and the latest pension age gossip. Plus, there's bad news as the German police decides that it would be a great idea to let Mr-Ayn-Rand-wet-dream-fascist-billionaire take over its databases, but also – just for the vibes - some general good news about German democracy, and Megan's special summer tips! Hooray!
Berliners! Write to your Bürgermeister here to stop library cuts! Jetzt Mail schreiben
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See, Jens? This is what happens when you don't do your job properly. This week, Germany's Constitutional Court is taken hostage by a right-wing social media campaign, as someone with normal opinions gets torn apart for no reason at all. And Jens Spahn might wanna stay out of Merz's way for a while. Then the summer holiday wars break out, as Markus Söder fights for every Bavarian teenager's sacred right to pick potatoes, while Berlin finally stops using a racist slur for one of its street names. Chin chin!
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Oof, what a stacked show this week: Germany's minimum wage saga reaches its disappointing denouement, German voters begin to wonder what the SPD is actually for, and Germany's Retail Institute comes up with an all but useless report on shoplifting. Meanwhile, a bold wood pigeon wants in on the mega sesh, and yes, wine and lemonade does indeed make an excellent summer drink. Salud!
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More Germans can't live on their wages, but the new minimum wage commission has decided to raise it, erm, minimally — ensuring another neoliberal wet dream this weekend for BlackRock Chancellor Friedrich Merz. Meanwhile, Olaf Scholz gets a shiny new office (but what for?), the Bundestag president is unnecessarily mean to the LGBTQ community, and we can confirm that former Health Minister Jens Spahn is indeed a wanker. All in a day's work for the Megacanners. Cheers!
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While one part of the German government tries to decide whether it's against international law to be sending weapons to a country that has started a war while committing genocide, another department is trying to figure out why one in four immigrants wants to leave the country. Meanwhile, we've apparently decided that enough Nazis are dead now so it's ok to have a military veterans' day. Plus, a tiny morsel of good news about urban speed limits. Cheers!
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The season of Jesus-bothering holidays is upon Germany, so the Megacanners honour the upcoming Pentecost by imbibing an appropriately sacred beverage: A Gordon's G&T. Meanwhile, the AfD begins to see the light about Russia as does Merz about Netanyahu — a bit late to the party, lads, I'm afraid the buffet's all gone — and there's some actually quite good news from the German courts! Hallelujah.
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It's been a funny old fortnight: Friedrich Merz trips over the doorstep to the chancellor's office, Bärbel Bas buggers the Beamtes, Christian clips a canine, and Germany gets its own little Elon to get rid of all of those distracting human rights and climate laws. Luckily, Germany's soldiers remember to tick the correct boxes on the Are-You-A-Nazi questionnaire. Thank God for those canned Martinis. Assume the position!
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New German Chancellor Friedrich Merz has picked his cabinet, and filled it with people like him, cos he’s so great: Getting a team of CEOs and lobbyists to run the country is bound to restore people’s faith in democracy. Not only that, Merz has had a brilliant idea: If we shit on immigrants even more it’ll definitely get people to stop voting for the AfD — why didn’t anyone think of that before? Speaking of which, the AfD gets a new rating on Germany’s official Nazism scale and 25% of Germans still think they’re the best. Wow, isn’t the news great!
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It's Easter, which means it's time for fertility rituals, chocolate bunnies and historic peace deals — at least it used to be. Peace seems a long way off, no matter how many Germans go marching for it this weekend, and as for chocolate bunnies, well, they look a bit too Muslim for the AfD. Meanwhile, Friedrich Merz, Markus Söder, and the SPD agree a new coalition contract — no rush, lads — and Konrad goes on holiday to hospital. Nurse? I'll have my drugs now, please!
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Slightly different megacan this week, as writer turned evac medic Howard Hunt joins Megan and Konrad once again for an update from the Ukraine war zone – with tales of impossibly brave men with no legs, skies filled with drones, how to drive an ambulance on hilariously bad roads in the dark, and other scenes from the edge of the precipice. Meanwhile in Germany, it seems some in the CDU think that, actually, being dependent on Russian gas might not be so bad after all. What the fucking actual fuck is going on?
Here's Howard's combat medic team in Ukraine, the AO:
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Friedrich Probably-Next-German-Chancellor Merz has decided that actually, if you think about it, billions in state debts are great after all — and don't worry about anything he might've said before the election — because what if we want to build tanks in Volkswagen factories? Also, who knew Hubert Aiwanger would turn out to be a massive weasel, more evidence that Germany needs more immigrants, and the results of Megan's citizenship test revealed. Woohoo!
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It's the end of an era: Scholz, Habeck, and friend of the pod Christian Lindner have all had their last Absacker and stumbled out into the night — you can still hear them arguing in the distance in a cloud of mutual acrimony. Hey, we just let the market regulate itself, Christian! But spare a thought for Megan, who has to learn a whole new set of German politicians' names. At least Merz will be easy to remember (it rhymes with Schmerz). And there was good news too: Arch-splitter Sahra Wagenknecht took her heeby-jeeby energy into the wilderness — and Die Linke finally figured out how to set up a TikTok account and do a proper election campaign. Hooray!
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This week, German TV producers finally came to their senses and invited Megan's Megacan to make its debut on a politics chat-show. As Megan was providing silent commentary over chief twat Hubert Aiwanger's shoulder, Konrad found out whether football fans can save Germany from fascism. Then they scramble around for good news for our "clutching at straws" section. Yes!
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