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Myopia Movies
Nic Hoffmann
437 episodes
15 hours ago
“Welcome to Season 11 of Myopia Movies! Each week, we dive back into the iconic films of the ’80s and ’90s that defined our youth, questioning the nostalgia and Blockbuster-induced myths we’ve held onto for decades. Do these classics truly hold up, or were our memories just playing tricks on us? Tune in as we put our childhood favorites to the ultimate test!”
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Film Reviews
Comedy,
TV & Film
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All content for Myopia Movies is the property of Nic Hoffmann and is served directly from their servers with no modification, redirects, or rehosting. The podcast is not affiliated with or endorsed by Podjoint in any way.
“Welcome to Season 11 of Myopia Movies! Each week, we dive back into the iconic films of the ’80s and ’90s that defined our youth, questioning the nostalgia and Blockbuster-induced myths we’ve held onto for decades. Do these classics truly hold up, or were our memories just playing tricks on us? Tune in as we put our childhood favorites to the ultimate test!”
Show more...
Film Reviews
Comedy,
TV & Film
Episodes (20/437)
Myopia Movies
Eight Crazy Nights
This week on Myopia Movies, we watch an entire town kick around a illiterate little person for 75 minutes. We watched Eight Crazy Nights, we tried to keep it festive, but Adam Sandler giving a TBI to the protagonist after the musical number about how great the mall is, was the best we could do. Happy Hanukah! How will Eight Crazy Nights hold up?Directed by Seth KearsleyStarring: Adam Sandler, Rob Schneider, Jackie Sandler, Austin Stout, Kevin Nealon, Norm Crosby, Jon Lovitz, Tyra Banks
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15 hours ago
1 hour 22 minutes

Myopia Movies
Jingle all the Way
This week on Myopia Movies, we watch a millennial Christmas Classic, Jingle All The Way! Bathe in the 1990s nostalgia as we visit trampling people for toys, malls, and toy stores. Also, Phil Hartman's masterclass on seducing a woman away from Arnold.  How will Jingle All The Way hold up? Host: Nic Panel: Keiko, Nur, Candice, Matthew, and Jeremy   Directed by Brian LevantStarring Arnold Schwarzenegger, Sinbad, Phil Hartman, Rita Wilson, Robert Conrad, Martin Mull, Jake Lloyd, Jim Belushi
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1 week ago
1 hour 40 minutes

Myopia Movies
Man of Steel
This week on Myopia Movies, we learn how the world became entranced with Henry Cavill and started to fall out with Zack Snyder. We watched Man of Steel home to the world's most vindictive Pa Kent and the one where Superman kills thousands in his final fight. Happy Thanksgiving from us at Myopia and safe shopping and travels today! How will Man of Steel hold up? Host: Nic Panel: Keiko, Matthew, Nur, Alex   Directed by Zack SnyderStarring Henry Cavill, Amy Adams, Michael Shannon, Diane Lane, Russell Crowe, Antje Traue, Harry Lennix, Richard Schiff, Christopher Meloni, Kevin Costner, Ayelet Zurer, Laurence Fishburne
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1 week ago
1 hour 42 minutes

Myopia Movies
Return to Oz
First, take a beloved musical from the 1930s and let it age on a shelf for forty-plus years. Second, strip out all the songs. Third, turn it into a waking nightmare. This week on Myopia Movies, we dove into Return to Oz! Isn’t it delightful when Creepy Kids Month syncs perfectly with a blockbuster release like Wicked: For Good? Though honestly…this movie might be memorable for entirely different reasons. Not good ones—just…reasons.   How will Return to Oz hold up?   Host: Nic Panel: Charlie, Alex, Keiko   Directed by: Walter Murch Starring: Fairuza Balk, Nicol Williamson, Jean Marsh, Piper Laurie, Matt Clark, Michael Sundin, Tim Rose, Sean Barrett, Mak Wilson, Brian Henson
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3 weeks ago
1 hour 2 minutes

Myopia Movies
The Ring (2002, USA)
"Like no one has ever been, like, aroused by close up magic, right? You're just like, ah, wow. That was my card. My God, where did that ball go? Who knows? Can I just pay for my, like, mozzarella sticks" - NicThis week, Myopia Movies continue Creepy Kid Movie Month with The Ring — the iconic, blue-green, early-2000s mood piece that taught us two essential truths: never trust a VHS tape without a label, and if a horse looks at you funny on a ferry… just walk away. We dive into Gore Verbinski’s eerie remake, the very specific shade of Pacific Northwest Depression Filter™, Naomi Watts’ crusade against cursed media, and the seven-day slow decline of a family held together mostly by caffeine and denial. Along the way, the panel examines horse suicides, VHS nostalgia, Pacific Northwest lighthouses, creepy kids named Aiden, and the logistics of a ghost girl committing long-distance murder through a Zenith television. Support Myopia Movies in a New Way! We’ve launched an Amazon Wish List filled with movies we want to riff—but here’s the twist: the titles are anonymous. You won’t know which Myopia host picked them! Buy one, and we’ll: Record an episode on the movie and you tell us anything you want to plug! We will record a special Myopia Riff of the movie just for you and mail you a copy with the optional riff audio. Sign the case It’s a mystery grab bag of bad movies, nostalgia, and chaos—our favorite combo. Check out the list and help us pick our next cinematic adventure! How will The Ring hold up? Host: Nic Panel: Keiko, Alex, MatthewDirected by Gore VerbinskiStarring: Naomi Watts, Martin Henderson, David Dorfman, Brian Cox, Jane Alexander, Lindsay Frost, Amber Tamblyn
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4 weeks ago
1 hour 41 minutes

Myopia Movies
The Good Son
This week we learn who is creepier, Macaulay Culkin who murdered one and a half siblings or Elijah Wood who is convinced that his mom is reincarnated into his aunt. We watched The Good Son. Ok, so the corpse highway car accident might be the greatest thing put to film and my favorite sentence I have gotten to write.  How will the Good Son hold up? Directed by Joseph RubenStarring: Macaulay Culkin, Elijah Wood, Wendy Crewson, David Morse, Daniel Hugh Kelly, Jacqueline Brookes, Quinn Culkin
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1 month ago
1 hour 14 minutes

Myopia Movies
The Omen (1976)
This week on Myopia Movies, we seamlessly transition from Horror into our next month based around creepy kids. We watched The Omen (1976), the movie that forever made the name Damien creepy.  How will The Omen (1976) hold up? Host: Nic Panel: Alex, Matthew, Nur Directed by Richard DonnerStarring: Gregory Peck, Lee Remick, David Warner, Billie Whitelaw, Harvey Stephens, Patrick Troughton, Martin Benson
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1 month ago
1 hour 26 minutes

Myopia Movies
Th13rteen Ghosts (2001)
What happens when you do reshoots on 9/11, cast a character so embarrassed by her role she’s mistaken for a porn star, and give Tony Shalhoub a dramatic lead after turning a comedy into a thriller? You get this beautiful mess. This week on Myopia Movies, we watched Thir13en Ghosts (2001) — because apparently, hiring Matthew Lillard to fight ghosts without Scooby-Doo was the real horror. How will Thir13en Ghosts (2001) hold up? Host: Nic Panel: Alex, Charlie, Matthew   Directed by Steve BeckStarring: Tony Shalhoub, Embeth Davidtz, Matthew Lillard, Shannon Elizabeth, Alec Roberts, JR Bourne, Rah Digga, F. Murray Abraham, Matthew Harrison
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1 month ago
1 hour 1 minute

Myopia Movies
Cujo (1983)
This week on Myopia Movies, we return to King Country and deal with rabies, domestic violence, and the used car market. We watched Cujo (1983), a reminder to why you never sleep with the handyman.  How will Cujo (1983) hold up? Host: Nic Panel: Nur   Directed by Lewis TeagueStarring: Dee Wallace, Danny Pintauro, Daniel Hugh Kelly, Christopher Stone, Ed Lauter
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1 month ago
1 hour 7 minutes

Myopia Movies
The Terminator
The is week on Myopia Movies, we went to the Jason Voorhees-esque horror movie that started it all, we watched The Terminator. Are you Sarah Connor?  How will The Terminator hold up? Host: Nic Panel: Alex, Matt, Keiko.  Directed by James Cameron Starring: Arnold Schwarzenegger, Linda Hamilton, Michael Biehn, Paul Winfield, Lance Henriksen, Rick Rossovich, Earl Boen, Dick Miller, Bill Paxton, Brian Thompson
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2 months ago
1 hour 46 minutes

Myopia Movies
The Birdcage
This week on Myopia Movies, we celebrate Atlanta Pride with The Birdcage! Welcome back to the show to the hairiest man that Hollywood could contain, with an added mustache! Who was the better man in drag, Nathan Lane or Robin Williams?  How does The Birdcage hold up? Host: Nic Hoffmann Panel: Charlie, Nur, Alex
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2 months ago
1 hour 15 minutes

Myopia Movies
Freddy vs Jason
This week on Myopia Movies, we couldn't wait any longer so we are starting our Horror Month a week early...and it may even stay on a bit longer! We watched Freddy vs Jason, to borrow a slogan from the Alien vs Predator movies as a review, "who ever wins, we, the audience, loses." How will Freddy vs Jason hold up? Host: Nic Panel: Keiko, Nur Directed by Ronny YuStarring: Robert Englund, Ken Kirzinger, Kelly Rowland, Monica Keena, Jason Ritter, Katharine Isabelle
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2 months ago
1 hour 14 minutes

Myopia Movies
Blown Away
The week on Myopia Movies, we fight the IRA. Represented by and speaking in Celtic by Tommy Lee Jones. We watched Blown Away! Who can stop them? Only Jeff Bridges (the Dude) and the President (his dad Lloyd Bridges). You may be asking yourself, who explodes? So many people! How will Blown Away hold up? Host: Nic Panel: Alex, Keiko   Directed by Stephen HopkinStarring: Jeff Bridges, Tommy Lee Jones, Suzy Amis, Lloyd Bridges, Forest Whitaker, Stephi Lineburg, John Finn
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2 months ago
1 hour 26 minutes

Myopia Movies
Enemy Mine
This week on Myopia Movies we study abroad! By that I mean we eat weird food, learn another language, and begrudgingly befriend our host family. We watched Enemy Mine, a big budget Star Trek episode starring Dennis Quaid.  How will Enemy Mine hold up? Host: Nic Panel: Keiko and Matthew
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3 months ago
1 hour 8 minutes

Myopia Movies
Uncle Buck
This week we eat some giant pancakes with some annoying children. We watched Uncle Buck, there just ain't enough John Candy out there. RIP.  How will Uncle Buck hold up? Host: Nic Panel: Charlie, Alex, Candace Directed by John HughesStarring: John Candy, Macaulay Culkin, Jean Louisa Kelly, Gaby Hoffmann, Amy Madigan, Elaine Bromka, Garrett M. Brown, Laurie Metcalf, Jay Underwood, Brian Tarantina, Mike Starr
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3 months ago
1 hour 10 minutes

Myopia Movies
Napoleon Dynamite
This week we dust off our Rex-Kwon-Do and sweet nunchuck skills while we eat our pocket tots. We watched Napoleon Dynamite, because we do whatever we feel like we wanna do. Gosh! 2004's most quoted movie. How will Napoleon Dynamite hold up? Host: Nic Panel: Candace, Alex, Charlie   Directed by Jared HessStarring: Jon Heder, Efren Ramirez, Jon Gries, Aaron Ruell, Diedrich Bader, Tina Majorino, Sandy Martin, Haylie Duff
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3 months ago
1 hour 4 minutes

Myopia Movies
Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers
This week we lose our Zords, but no worries, its always in the last place you look....We watched Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers (1995), oozing for 30 years. How will Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers (1995) hold up? Host: Nic Panel: Nur, Keiko   Directed by Bryan SpicerStarring: Karan Ashley, Johnny Yong Bosch, Steve Cardenas, Jason David Frank, Amy Jo Johnson, David Yost, Paul Schrier, Jason Narvy, Paul Freeman, Gabrielle Fitzpatrick,Nicholas Bell, Peta-Marie Rixon, Jean Paul Bell, Kerry Casey, Mark Ginther, Julia Cortez
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3 months ago
1 hour 25 minutes

Myopia Movies
The Sandlot
This week on Myopia Movies, we indulge the dog days of summer with a visit to The Sandlot. This is the first time I noticed the puppet, the terrifying terrifying puppet.  How will The Sandlot hold up? Host: Nic Panel: Nur, Alex, Matt   Directed by David Mickey Evans Starring: Tom Guiry, Mike Vitar, Art LaFleur, Patrick Renna, Denis Leary, Karen Allen, James Earl Jones, Marley Shelton. 
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3 months ago
1 hour 22 minutes

Myopia Movies
Road House (1989) Revisited
This week we revisit the Double Deuce and revisit Road House, a delightful film and cast. How will Road House hold up? Host: Nic Panel: Keiko, Matt, Alex Directed by Rowdy Herrington Starring: Patrick Swayze, Ben Gazzara, Kelly Lynch, Sam Elliott
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4 months ago
1 hour 12 minutes

Myopia Movies
Superman 4: The Quest for Peace
This week on Myopia, we realize why the Superman franchise went dormant for nearly two decades, we watched Superman IV: The Quest for Peace...why. I mean....Nuclear Man alone...our shortest episode in years....sorry, not sorry. How will Superman 4: The Quest for Peace hold up? Spoilers, poorly.  Host: Nic Panel: Alex, Keiko, Nur   Directed by Sidney J. FurieStarring: Christopher Reeve, Gene Hackman, Margot Kidder, Jackie Cooper, Marc McClure, Jon Cryer, Sam Wanamaker, Mark Pillow, Mariel Hemingway, Jim Broadbent
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4 months ago
37 minutes

Myopia Movies
“Welcome to Season 11 of Myopia Movies! Each week, we dive back into the iconic films of the ’80s and ’90s that defined our youth, questioning the nostalgia and Blockbuster-induced myths we’ve held onto for decades. Do these classics truly hold up, or were our memories just playing tricks on us? Tune in as we put our childhood favorites to the ultimate test!”