"Meri ventures into the wild world of dating apps; Kody struggles to fake it about the new family dynamic, as he and Robyn pack up their home; Christine has a strong reaction to Janelle's comment about being closer to the kids."
Kody reflects back on how he became the incredible man he is today and how he became the most masculine man in the world. Meri is hoping to find someone who is 6'4" with long curly hair, strong grip and a nice pair of knockers. Christine is once again abandoned by another kid for Janelle.
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"Mykelti and Tony drive right into a tornado as Christine and David help them move to North Carolina; Kody and Robyn decide to begin anew; someone makes an unexpected pregnancy announcement."
Meri has her super cool gal pals over to paint some dicks. Mykelti and Tony almost die in a Tornado, but never stop filming. Kody and Robyn are so excited to get into even more debt, but Areola is pumped to finally be able to play hide n' theek. Christine and David get a little hot and heavy listen to their erotic audio book.
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"Meri's speed dating event starts out awkward until she meets an encouraging suitor named Ron. Janelle and Meri discuss what needs to be done to sell Coyote Pass, as Kody pushes Robyn to move on. Christine has a hard time dealing with Tony and Mykelti's decision to move to North Carolina."
Meri has Worthied Up a little too much and now thinks she's better than everyone else at the AA meeting {Speed Dating} Christine is arrested by PETA after reports of her being a bitch to some bitches {Justice for Princess} Janelle gets stuck having to talk to Meri, Tony and Mykelti pack up their lifetime supply of Mountain Dew and head east, while Kody and Robyn are looking to upgrade, so that KODY'S kids can never come to visit.
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"The recruits must repel out of a military-grade helicopter; the recruits get a taste of what it's like operating behind enemy lines as they carry supplies weighing 800 pounds in sweltering 100-degree heat."
Kody Brown has landed in Morocco – home of the Morrocan Oil for Curls. He is here as a recruit, but will probably be running the barracks. Poor Brittany Cartwright gave it her best shot, Theresa "Barbie Doll" Guidice is our poopie queen and Jussie Smollett never shuts up. Foxy and/or Billy, along with Denise Richards lover, Rudy, are here to fuck these celebrities up.
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"Christine and David visit Janelle in North Carolina to celebrate the purchase of her new flower farm property. Kody and Robyn discuss their now monogamist relationship and the possibility of bringing in a new wife. Meri dips her toe back into the dating world and heads to a speed dating event."
Move over Taylor Frankie Paul, Parowan has a new hot bachelorette on the scene: Meri Brown. Meri and Just Jenn head to Salt Lake for a round of speed dating, while Kody and Robyn go on a date with a dessert of licking. David "No Butt" Woolley Brown is a trackstar, Janelle is sick of his shit and Christine is going full Tuscan.
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Sister Wives is coming back and we are wet. A new production company, a boys hang, Janelle flashing her tits, Meri pretending to not want Kody back, Christine gets an apology and Robyn has comissioned a new art piece that will go down in Sister Wives history! The new season is here and we are fucking stressed.
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"David gives his thoughts on polygamy and the role men play within it; Kody discusses a college secret he kept from Christine and Janelle, as Christine wonders what else could have been kept from her."
Kody opens up about his sexuality, but later regrets it when Suki talks about only getting an inch. Christine is still in love with Kody, while Janelle is hornier than ever for a dirty, nasty man who can rail her in the woods. Meri closes out the season pathetic and Robyn gets the luggage rack.
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"Meri discusses her distrust over Coyote Pass; Janelle describes button pushing and defines love bombing; Suki asks the big question: who gets the luggage rack?"
Kody and Robyn keep sucking each others faces off only in an effort to get back at Meri. Janelle is brushing off her own copy of the BDSM-5 and giving us her professional diagnosis on Kody. Christine is horny for David, while Kody is being shunned from the family for one little blowjob in public.
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"As the One-on-One conversations continue, Janelle opens up about her dislike for both Kody and Robyn. Christine discusses her issue with the term "favorite ex-wife," and Kody considers a guy trip with David."
David and Kody plan themselves a boys weekend that neither of them will soon forget. Meri has been catfished once again, but instead of Samuel, it's by her favorite ex-husband. Robyn is popping pills while Janelle is popping off on how much she hates her old family members.
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"The Brown family sits down to discuss their past and future; as Christine says she tried to make her relationship with Kody work, he says that the wives all had the same chances as Robyn; the family comments on Meri's legal divorce from Kody."
Kody Brown, or as he calls himself, Mr. Accountable is sick of getting the shit kicked out of him for loving Robyn! Christine is finally best dressed, Janelle is once again in a sensible white capri to match her calves and Meri is ready to date, again and again and again and again.
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Robert Garrison Brown
04.10.1998 - 03.04.2023
On March 4th, beloved son, brother, uncle, and friend Robert Garrison Brown joined his ancestors in the halls of Valhalla. Born to Janelle and Kody Brown, 6th child of a big, unconventional family.
Preceded in death by Sheryl Lee Brown, William Winn Brown, and Curtis Taylor Brown. He is survived by his large, adoring family and his three cats Catthew, Patches, and Ms. Buttons.
We remember him as the coolest dude who lived with a zeal for life, led through his curiosity. He was a world traveler, going to multiple countries and continents. He was a jack of all trades and a master in comedy. He enjoyed being an amateur craftsman and a adventurous photographer. His night sky photography evoked deep emotion. He was a Staff Sergeant in the Army National Guard and a proud CAV Scout. He was in school to become a Nurse because he cared about people.
Robert Garrison knew the best thing to say to make everyone laugh, especially in awkward situations. He made friends everywhere he went and his death leaves all who knew him in immense pain.
Robert Garrison's death is a reminder to tell those you love how you feel and take care of each other. Where do we turn when we miss him? "To the stars, Bowen, to the stars."
If you or someone you know is struggling or in crisis, help is available.
Call or text 988 to reach the Suicide & Crisis
Lifeline or chat at 988lifeline.org
"Christine is excited to spend her first monogamous Valentine's Day with David. Meri and Janelle meet at Coyote Pass to discuss a strategy moving forward. Robyn and Kody discuss not being polygamists anymore, and Kody expresses his disappointment in plural marriage."
Janelle puts aside her pride and forces herself to talk to Meri, in hopes that Meri will foot the bill for an attorney. Robyn does the first work she's done in years, building a vanity for Aerola. Kody hires a PR team to fix his image, while Christine and David spend their Valentine's Day talking about Kody.
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"With Christine's help, Janelle moves her life from Flagstaff to North Carolina and sees the land that she purchased sight unseen; Meri questions her entire relationship with Robyn; Kody prepares to baptize Aurora into a new church."
David's got a dirty ass, Janelle is ready to hit the land moseying the second she closes on her new property– that is definitely not going to be a Coyote Pass 2.0 and Meri has added another career to her résumé as My Sister Wife's Closet customer service. Awowah, who is a full grown woman is still seeking permission from Kody and Robyn to get dunked.
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"On a road trip across the country to move Janelle to North Carolina, Christine, Janelle and David stop at a bar where Janelle has her first shot ever. The fate of Meri's B&B is up in the air, and Kody and Robyn have a heart to heart with Aurora."
Awowah is nervous to tell her parents what she's been doing behind their back and why she has been spending so much time on her knees and calling out for Big Daddy... and it's that she's ready to get baptized and be one with the Lord. Janelle gets sloshed on her first slippery nipple, Christine doesn't shut up the entire drive and Meri wastes more of our time.
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"Janelle and Meri join forces to finally get answers about Coyote Pass, but Kody is having doubts about letting it go. Christine takes another step towards independence and buys a vacation rental in Moab."
Janelle is busy collecting documents and zooming Meri– all in an effort to take Kody down. Robyn and her tenders just barely escape a tragic death by table. Christine is really going all in on her new business venture in Moab– but David has shrimp on the mind!
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"Christine and Janelle each reveal big new chapters in their lives. Kody meets with a realtor at Coyote Pass. Meri has a new companion in her life, and considers meeting with a lawyer about the property."
Janelle is an absolute villain to poor innocent Kody and Robyn– and all she cares about is money for more appliances and shit. Kody spills his entire life story to his new realtor, Meri and Jen are busy being salty bitches and Christine wears an awful braided ponytail while buying a place in Moab.
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"The day is finally here that Christine is getting married! It's a joyful event on the banks of the Colorado River as Christine and David say, "I do." Kody discusses missing out on the Brown family celebration, and has a scary close call while cutting down a tree."
The day is finally here a-fucking-gain. Christine is going to assault David out on the dance floor on their wedding day. A flash mob ensues and makes all Christine's Bruno Mars dreams come true. Meri is fillin' feisty and ready to come out and play with her crazy best friends, Just Jenn and Blaire with the lips. Robyn tries to kill Kody but is unsuccessful.
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"Meri cuts up a quilt that celebrated her marriage to Kody; Christine and David are in Moab preparing for their magical day; Robyn and Kody have a difficult conversation about the break-up of the family."
Meri reflects on all the good times her and Kody shared, like when he told her that she's a miserable bitch and he can't wait to return the favor. Cameras are rolling as Robyn soars to new heights. Christine and David continue to shove their wedding down our throat. Janelle springs into action when Toyota Avalon ends up on a milk carton.
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"Robyn's girls explore non-mormon churches and Kody struggles to keep quiet about it. Christine tries on her fairytale wedding dress, and the party continues with a wedding shower. Meri wants to start dating soon."
Meri and her friend Amber Malynn are having fun destroying any shred of Kody from Meri's life when a tragic accident takes Amber's knee. Dweedle Dee, Dweedle Dumb and Neck decide to try out a new church that leaves them in tears. Christine gets to try on her ill-fitted custom wedding dress, thanks to Destrie!
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"Kody and Robyn go on a date, and Kody rails against their former church. Christine and David host an engagement party with some very messy tacos. Meri and Jenn visit Brandi in Las Vegas to dish about her spiritual release from Kody."
As the Brown family continues to fall apart, cameras turn their attention to Christine and the shocking storyline no-one saw coming. Robyn goes to church and is immediately surrounded by men who want to fuck her. Janelle looks hot in a pink dress and Meri takes Brandi and Jen to do exactly what Kody did on last weeks episode.
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