Hello and welcome to a very special festive SMERSHPOD!

This time, ho ho, oh, oh no, it’s another of our extra special compilation episodes – and this time, because it’s the festive period, we’re bringing you the 12 SMERSHES OF CHRISTMAS.

A dozen doozies from the last year or so, we’ve even got gold rings!

Huge thanks to Tim Colman for putting the clips together.

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DING DONG MERRILY ON HIGH!

Merry ChristSMERSH!

It’s Christmas Day! And what better time to crack open the Quality Street, pour a glass of Baileys, and tune into ITV SMERSH as we book a first LAUGH flight to Costa Plonka and sun ourselves while an in-tents revolution breaks out, climaxing in a great big Union Jack-off!

Yes, it’s ARE YOU BEING SERVED? THE MOVIE!

Joining me to say no Sachs please we’re British, is Paul Litchfield.

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DING DONG MERRILY ON HIGH!

Welcome to another ChristSMERSH special!

Happy Christmas Eve to you all!

Today we’ll be going back to the past to tell the inspirational tale of a stuck tongue, a rifle, and a simple man who really wants a leg lamp in his window - no it’s not the Ed Gein biopic, it’s A Christmas Story.

Joining me to get a C+ in double dog dares is Kate McCabe.

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Welcome to the final part of our Lord of the Rings specials.

It’s Christmas! So where better to celebrate than Middle Earth!

We’ll be looking things up on the web, putting on the Eagles, while also looking for rings down at the riverbank and coming home to a warm Shire.

Yes, it’s Return of the King.

And joining me to bow to no one are Tom Neenan and Tom Crowley. 

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Welcome to a Christsmersh Special!

This week we’ll be bringing back Christmas traditions that have long left us. We’ll be getting a bird down, spending quality time with friends both old and new, feeling depressed, and watching on as an Australian drinks too much and has a big fight on the lawn.

Yes, it’s Lethal Weapon. 

Joining me to agree that I am indeed too old for this shit, is David Hoare with an H

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Ding Dong Merrily on High! Welcome to a ChristSMERSH Special!

Today we’ll be listening to Christmas lectures and trying to raise our spirits in the cemetery, and much like every Christmas there will be a bit of horrible self reflection, some heartless poetry, a couple of blind alleys, and a big screaming stiff!

Yes, it’s Tales from the Crypt

And joining me to look for the Claus in her contract, is a very festive Anna Savory.

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A tribute to the late, great Rob Reiner.

This week we’ll be looking for true love, lost fathers and six fingers, but enough about those Andre the Giant rumours. 

Yes, it’s The Princess Bride. 

Joining me to read a story to a cancelled child, are Tom Neenan and Tom Crowley.

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This week we’ll be running away to join the circus to find out just what these bloody clowns have done with this pesky mole. 

Yes, it’s Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Spy

And joining me to be Smiley friends with a very slow horse, is Andrew O’Neill. 

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This week we’ll be keeping calm and carrying on as we head back to WW2 in order to lose ourselves in Paris after a Sly game of football with our old foe Jerry.

Yes, it’s Escape to Victory

And joining me to get pulled off at half time by a Frenchman is Paul Whitelaw.

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Recorded February 23rd 2021

In this, the 30th episode of the Monday Night Movie Club, we returned to the man who first brought us together: Dan Aykroyd, and have a look at yet another god-awful offering. 

RIP Steve Cropper.

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This week we’ll be heading into future deep space to try and deal with an insect infestation so bad we’ll need the world’s biggest slipper to stand even half a chance. 

Yes, it’s Starship Troopers

Joining me to get Dizzy and achieve total Rico, are two Ace guys: Tom Crowley and David Hoare.

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Welcome to another Spider-Man special!

This week we’ll be swinging back to 2004 to find out just what too much responsibility can do to your fluids, and ask the question as old as time: where does the world’s most intelligent scientist keeps his armies - up his sleevies! 

Yes, it’s Spider-Man 2

Joining me to pop on a Parker and catch a train is Tom Burgess. 

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This week we’ll be looking up to the sky in order to eventually head towards the light, while also winning the heart of a lady by showing her our massive cucumber and two red hot over ripe tomatoes.

Yes, it’s Phenomenon

And joining me to show light the way is top egghead neuroscientist, according to to the Daily Star, Dr. Dean Burnett. 

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This week we’ll be taking a dip into the complicated world of inter-species-cartoon love, and examining just what the legal implications are of dropping a safe on someone’s head. 

Yes, it’s Who Framed Roger Rabbit

Joining me are two men never afraid to be drawn into a mystery, Tom Neenan and Tom Crowley.

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This week we’ll be finding out what happens when a normal wrestler is pushed to the edge and forced to choose between the woman he loves, or the sport he loves - until it’s unionised. Will he tell Vince about the union thing, or will he come out fighting when “The Battle of the Tough Guys” comes calling?

Yes, it’s No Holds Barred.

And joining me to rip em up and break some beds, is Andy from the Bang Bang Podcast. 

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Happy Halloween!

Today we’ll be heading out to Spivey Point to tell stories around the camp fire all about a pea souper full of sea men - and I’m not talking about the new Winter Bukake range from Campbells. 

Yes, it’s THE FOG

And joining me to find out just what they did with the drunken sailors, is Toby Hadoke. 

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Welcome to another Halloween Special. 

This week we’ll be peeking into the future in order to find out who will get hurt running with scissors, who will be skating on thin ice, and just who will be left holding the baby. 

Yes, it’s The Dead Zone

And joining me to take Walken on the wild side, is John Thomson.

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Welcome to another Halloween Special!

This week we’ll be finding room for one more hole in one inside, while playing hide and seek with the man in the mirror, even though he’s a bit of a dummy. 

Yes, it’s Dead of Night

And joining me to dream a little dream or two, is Anna Savory. 

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Welcome to another Halloween Special!

This week we’ll be time hopping into the future in order to stop a highly dangerous flying ham of sorcery from destroying the world, and sending the universe into ultimate darkness.

Yes, it’s Warlock!

And joining me to look for mucky books on a farm, is Paul Litchfield

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Welcome to another Halloween Special!

This week we’ll be finding out how to get A HEAD in science, while also aiming to shock the world of science by showing them our frothing angry stiff ones.

Yes, it’s Re-animator

And joining me are two men that I am DEAD lucky to have with me, Eminent Brain doctor Dr. Dean Burnett, and award winning Welsh man Dan Thomas. 

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