In this episode of The In-Between, Evan sits down with Suzanne Stabile—Enneagram teacher, spiritual director, and author of The Road Back to You and The Journey Toward Wholeness. Often referred to as the "Enneagram Godmother," Suzanne has spent decades helping people see themselves more clearly and live more compassionately—especially through seasons of deep change.

Suzanne shares how her own journey—from divorce and remarriage, to being blackballed from the Catholic Church, to co-creating Life in the Trinity Ministry—shaped the way she teaches, loves, and lets go. She reflects on what it means to be “called into ministry,” how that calling can evolve, and why we need to stop pretending that every spiritual or vocational assignment is forever.

We talk about how relationships shift during transitions—why some friendships are seasonal, how the “present moment” stance can unintentionally give the wrong impression, and why letting go doesn’t have to mean it didn’t matter.

She also speaks to the Enneagram as more than a personality tool—it’s a way to understand how we relate to others, especially when we’re disoriented, over-functioning, or defaulting to old survival strategies.

Takeaways:

👉 Why the Golden Rule is a myth—and how the Enneagram teaches us to treat people the way they want to be treated.

👉 Suzanne’s deeply personal take on calling, grief, and how “doing the next right thing” became a lifeline.

👉 How orientation to time (past, present, or future) shapes our expectations in relationships—and sometimes leaves us hurt.

👉 “Every expectation is a resentment waiting to happen”—why friendships in transition feel so tender.

👉 The danger of over-promising in ministry seasons, and how unspoken expectations lead to relational confusion.

👉 Why everyone needs three companions: a spiritual director, a therapist, and a contemplative practice.

👉 “We weren’t made to flourish in someone else’s way.” Suzanne shares what flourishing looks like now—through aging, writing, and grandparenting.

This episode is for anyone who’s navigating the loss of role-based identity, wondering how to discern what's theirs to carry forward, and longing for connection that’s rooted in presence, not performance.

📝 Show Notes: https://itstheinbetween.com/episode22-suzanne-stabile/