In this episode of The Pausing Porn Podcast, I talk about the real difference between addiction and fulfillment and why this mindset shift can completely change your porn recovery journey.
I break down what addiction actually is using both a clinical definition and a simple idea that helped me understand my own compulsive porn use. Addiction is not just about watching porn. It is the progressive narrowing of the things that bring you pleasure. I share how this showed up in my own life as porn slowly replaced friendships, hobbies, and real connection.
Then I explore the opposite of addiction which is fulfillment. Fulfillment is the expansion of meaning, connection, and joy across your life. Recovery is not just about quitting porn. It is about building a life that no longer needs porn as an escape or coping mechanism.
If you are working toward a life free from compulsive porn use and want a healthier and more fulfilling future, this episode will help you take a meaningful step forward.
Quitting porn is hard. But staying addicted to it is even harder.
In this episode of The Pausing Porn Podcast, I talk about why relapse can feel like the easy option in the moment and how it actually makes life more difficult over time. I break down what really happens after a relapse, how urges get stronger when we act on them, and why porn is often a way to escape stress, anxiety, or discomfort rather than the real problem itself.
Using personal experiences and reflections from my own recovery, I explain why sitting with urges is a skill that takes practice and why choosing recovery, even when it feels hard, leads to a better life than staying stuck in compulsive porn use.
If you are struggling with urges, relapse cycles, or building a life free from porn, this episode will help you reframe the choice in front of you and move forward with clarity.
Listen now and choose your hard.
In this episode I break down one of the biggest lies porn teaches men without ever saying a word. If you grew up watching porn like I did, you probably developed a completely distorted idea of what the average penis size is and what women actually care about in the bedroom. This belief is not based on reality. It comes from years of repetition and comparing yourself to porn actors who represent the extreme top one percent.
I talk about the best scientific research we have on penis size including the major study published in the British Journal of Urology International that measured more than fifteen thousand men. I also share what the data actually shows about what women value in sex and why emotional connection trust communication and confidence matter far more than size.
Porn trains men to focus on performance and comparison but real intimacy is built on presence and partnership. My goal with this episode is to help you challenge the insecurities that porn created and replace them with facts that support your confidence and your recovery.
If you have ever felt insecure about your size or believed you are not enough this episode will help you reset your standards and understand what really matters. Thanks for listening and I hope this one gives you clarity and relief as you continue your healing journey.
In this episode of the Pausing Porn Podcast, I am starting a new monthly series called The Recovery Inbox where I answer your questions directly on porn recovery. Today's question comes from someone in a recovery community on Reddit asking: should you tell your partner when you relapse?
I share my honest take based on lived experience and what I have learned in my recovery from compulsive porn use. I talk about the difference between healthy transparency and harmful over sharing, why your partner should not be your accountability partner, and how full disclosure can sometimes create pressure, anxiety, and more secrecy. I also explain why relapse details belong with an accountability partner, therapist, or recovery group, and how selective transparency can protect both your relationship and your healing.
I also cover how compulsive porn use impacts intimacy, emotional connection, trust, and communication in a romantic relationship, and why experts warn that daily disclosure can overwhelm partners and create secondary trauma. My goal in this episode is to help you understand when transparency is healthy, when it becomes damaging, and how to communicate honestly without hurting your partner or sabotaging your recovery.
I hope this gives you clarity on how to navigate honesty, boundaries, setbacks, and support as you work toward a life free from porn.
If you want to submit a question for a future Recovery Inbox episode, you can message me on Reddit @pausingporn or comment directly on the podcast. I appreciate you being here and I hope this episode helps your recovery journey.
In this episode of The Pausing Porn Podcast, I dive into one of the biggest questions in recovery — is porn really an addiction. I explain what the World Health Organization classifies compulsive porn use as, I share my personal experience with compulsive porn use, how it meets nearly every sign of addiction like loss of control, craving, tolerance, and withdrawal, and why I believe porn can still function as an addiction even if it is not officially recognized.
I talk about why this classification matters for people struggling with porn, from the lack of research and treatment funding to the stigma and confusion it creates for men trying to quit. I also explore whether calling yourself a porn addict helps or harms recovery and how to use language that supports real healing rather than shame.
If you have ever asked yourself whether porn is an addiction, or how that affects recovery, this episode will give you the science, clarity, and mindset you need to move forward.
Keywords: porn addiction, addictive, compulsive porn use, porn recovery, porn disorder, DSM 5, compulsive sexual behaviour disorder, quitting porn, how to stop watching porn, porn withdrawal, porn cravings, porn tolerance, porn classification, addiction recovery, men’s mental health
Porn does not just change your habits. It can change the way you see people.
In this episode, I talk about how porn conditions your brain to objectify women instead of building real attraction and connection. You will learn what sexual objectification really is, how it is different from healthy attraction, and how it quietly shows up in your daily life.
I also share my own story of how this looked for me. How I would catch myself scanning the world around me for women to sexualize without even realizing it, and how I began retraining my brain to see people as people again.
By the end of this episode, you will have practical steps to build awareness, reframe what you see, connect with others, and reflect on the deeper emotions that fuel objectification.
If you are ready to move past porn’s influence and start seeing people with respect again, this episode will help you take that next step.
Keywords: porn addiction recovery, objectification, attraction, awareness, rewiring the brain, dopamine, empathy, connection, mindfulness, self improvement
This episode is a little different. I take a step back to share who The Pausing Porn Podcast is really for, why I started it, and where it is heading next.
I talk about the mission behind the podcast, the free recovery guide Nathan and I are creating, the plans for building a supportive recovery community, and our long-term vision to create the best porn addiction recovery app in the world.
If you have ever felt alone in your struggle or wondered where this project is going, this episode will help you see that you are part of something bigger. Thank you for being here and helping this movement grow.
Most of us think we know what porn is, but I’ve learned that what counts as porn has changed more in the last decade than in the last century. In this episode, I talk about what actually qualifies as porn today and why your personal definition might be the reason you keep relapsing.
I’ll walk you through both the obvious and non-obvious types of porn, from videos and OnlyFans to dating apps and social media that can trigger the same reward circuits. You’ll learn how to define what is off limits for you and how setting clear boundaries can make recovery simpler and more sustainable.
If you’ve ever wondered whether something “counts as porn,” this episode will help you find clarity and strengthen your recovery.
In this episode of The Pausing Porn Podcast, I talk about one of the biggest challenges in recovery, which is your urges. I’ll explain what an urge actually is, what it feels like, and I’ll also walk you through how I learned to sit with urges instead of fighting them and how that mindset shift completely changed my recovery. By the end of this episode, you’ll see that urges are just messages from your brain, not commands, and you’ll know how to face them with awareness and control.
Relapse is one of the hardest parts of porn addiction recovery. For years, every relapse left me feeling weak, hopeless, and ashamed. I thought it was proof that I was broken. But today, if I relapsed, I’d respond completely differently.
In this episode of The Pausing Porn Podcast, I share exactly what I would do if I relapsed right now. You’ll hear how my old cycle of secrecy, shame, and distraction kept me trapped, and how today I’d respond with accountability, self-compassion, and reflection instead.
We’ll talk about why relapse happens, how to break the shame cycle, and the practical steps that can turn relapse into growth instead of defeat.
If you’ve ever asked yourself “What do I do after a relapse?” this episode will give you perspective, encouragement, and a framework for moving forward in your recovery journey.
In this episode I share one of the hardest parts of my recovery journey from porn addiction: the loneliness and shame that kept me trapped for years. I open up about confessing to my partner in 2020, relapsing the very next day, and how secrecy drove me deeper into isolation. I talk about the cycle of guilt, why shame fuels disconnection, and how my early attempts at support often left me feeling misunderstood. Eventually I found real change through accountability, community, and honest connection. If you have ever felt alone in your struggle with porn, this episode is for you.
Is masturbation relapse, or can it actually be part of recovery? In this episode of The Pausing Porn Podcast, I explore one of the most debated topics in the NoFap community and porn recovery space. I look at the arguments against masturbation, the potential benefits that science points to, and what healthy masturbation can look like when it is practiced with intention. I'll also share my personal story of going from compulsive use tied to porn, to experimenting with mindful masturbation, and finding a way to reconnect with myself. Toward the end, I introduce the Sexual Hunger Scale, a practical tool to help you check whether your desire comes from genuine connection or from emotional escape. By the end of the episode, you will have a deeper understanding of how to make an informed choice that supports your recovery, your values, and the kind of life you want to build.
Have you ever promised yourself, that was the last time only to relapse hours later? If so, you’re not weak, you’re human. In this episode of The Pausing Porn Podcast, I break down why willpower alone will never set you free from porn addiction, and what science says you need instead.
We’ll cover:
Why almost everyone starts recovery with willpower (and why it fails).
The science of dopamine, stress, and conditioning that makes urges so powerful.
Why shame and secrecy push you deeper into the cycle.
Practical tools that actually work: systems, accountability, emotional regulation, replacement habits, and building a bigger life.
If you’ve been stuck relying on streaks and self-control, this episode will show you a better way forward.
Social media is one of the biggest double edged swords in recovery from porn addiction. It can help by connecting you to supportive communities and inspiring content, but it can also trigger relapses, drain your time, and keep you stuck in old cycles.
In this episode of The Pausing Porn Podcast, I break down the role social media plays in recovery, both the benefits and the risks. I share my own story of how social media fueled my addiction, why I eventually deleted my accounts, and how I was later able to reintroduce it in a healthier way.
If you have ever relapsed because of something you saw while scrolling, or if you are wondering whether to quit social media, set stricter boundaries, or continue using it with more awareness, this episode will help you reflect and make the right choice for your recovery.
In this episode of The Pausing Porn Podcast, I talk about one of the most important lessons I’ve learned in recovery. Change doesn’t happen from knowledge alone, it happens when you take action. For years I thought reading, learning, and planning would be enough, but nothing shifted until I actually started applying it. I’ll share parts of my own story, the role accountability played, and why stepping out of just planning mode is what really moves you forward. My hope is that this episode inspires you to take that next step in your own recovery journey.
In today’s episode of The Pausing Porn Podcast, I share the top 3 benefits I’ve experienced since gaining a life free from porn. While everyone’s recovery journey is unique, I dive into the powerful changes I noticed in my mental health, my friendships, and how I use my time. Living porn free doesn’t just remove a habit, it creates space for real growth, connection, and purpose.
If you’ve ever wondered what life without porn could look like, this episode will give you a glimpse into the freedom and clarity that recovery brings.
Have you noticed your porn tastes change over time? Sure you have. If you are anything like I was, you've probably been consistently seeking novelty for awhile now. There's a reason for that by the way.
In todays micro episode, I discuss why your porn tastes have changed over time. These are the reasons why some of you find yourself watching porn that does not align with your values, or maybe even your sexuality. I hope this episode helps you guys out.
Have you heard of them yet... porn blockers? These are they apps, software's, browser extensions, or router filters that are made to prevent you from accessing porn. Sounds like an easy way to recover right? In a perfect world you could install porn blockers on all your devices and you'd never be able to watch porn again. If only it were that easy.
In this micro episode of The Pausing Porn Podcast, I answer the question if these blockers really work, if they worked for me, and who they'd be most likely to work for. I hope you enjoy!
I bet you guys have asked yourself this question many times in your recovery from porn addiction, "is recovery even possible"? In todays micro podcast, I'll be answering the question directly. My answer comes from both what science says, and my own personal story. Thanks for tuning in and I hope you enjoy.
Journaling can be one of the most powerful tools in porn addiction recovery. In this episode of The Pausing Porn Podcast, I share how journaling helped me stop hiding from my urges and emotions and start being transparent with myself. Giving journaling a chance gave me a space to process urges, slips, and feelings without secrecy while also helping me gain clarity in other areas of life. We will explore why journaling works, the difference between pen and paper and digital journaling, and how you can start today to build honesty and clarity in your recovery.