In this episode, we explore a feeling so many people carry:
What do I do when no one needs me?
If you grew up getting approval for being 'good' or 'useful,' your nervous system learned that doing equals value - and being equals nothing.
So when life gets still, or when the roles fall away, your identity can collapse.
In this episode, Dr Ali Walker breaks down:
why presence feels uncomfortable when you’re used to performing
and how to rebuild a clear, grounded sense of self
You’ll get practical tools to reconnect with yourself, anchor your identity, and feel like you again… not just the roles you play.
In this episode of This Is How We Feel, Dr. Ali Walker, behavioural scientist and expert in group dynamics, shares five practical, science-backed ways you can shift your own energy and transform the group around you.
The real story in any group isn’t what’s being said, but what’s being felt.
In this episode of This Is How We Feel, Ali Walker explores the invisible emotional energy that flows through every team, family, and culture.
You’ll learn about:
- How individuals act as conductors and absorbers of group energy
- Why one person’s mood can ripple through an entire room
- How emotional energy influences leadership and teamwork
Whether you’re leading a team, navigating family dynamics, or curious about human behaviour, this episode will give you a new lens to understand the groups you are in.
Why does a small comment sometimes cause a huge (over)reaction? In this episode of This Is How We Feel, Dr Ali Walker explores how old emotions from our past can hijack the present, causing us to overreact in relationships.
We unpack why our brains replay old patterns, how these 'old' emotions show up in everyday interactions, and simple ways to respond with awareness.
Tune in to start noticing your feelings in a whole new way.
In every group, from families and friendships to teams and nations, there are invisible forces at play. Power, status, and hierarchy shape who speaks, who listens, and who gets left out.
In this episode, Dr. Ali Walker unpacks the hidden rituals that reinforce group hierarchies, explores how status is performed and perceived, and examines what happens when the balance of power begins to shift.
We ask:
What is power beyond titles and roles?
How do we unconsciously play status games?
What happens when we challenge group norms?
And how can we create spaces where power moves with integrity?
Whether you're navigating team politics, rethinking your role in a social group, or questioning long-standing dynamics in your family, this episode invites you to look beneath the surface — and lead with awareness.
Why do some of us become the overachiever, while others fade into the background or act out in rebellion?
In this episode, we explore the 5 classic roles children take on in dysfunctional family systems - the Hero, the Rebel, the Lost Child, the Mascot, and the Caretaker. These roles aren’t personality traits - they’re survival strategies we unconsciously adopt to find safety, attention, or connection in emotionally chaotic environments.
You’ll learn:
Where these roles come from and why they form
How they shape our adult relationships and self-worth
The hidden emotional cost of playing a role to be loved
If you’ve ever wondered why you became the way you are, or felt stuck in a version of yourself that doesn’t quite feel real, this episode is for you.
Why do so many of us feel like we’re constantly performing - just to be accepted? In this powerful first episode, Dr. Ali Walker explores the hidden emotional cost of the “social game” we’ve all been taught to play - from childhood cliques to adult circles of power and popularity.
We unpack the dynamics of performative belonging, the roles we unconsciously adopt, and the quiet longing underneath it all: to be seen, to be safe, and to be loved without conditions.
This episode is an invitation to step out of the game, pause the performance, and begin the journey toward true connection- with others, and with yourself.
Key themes:
The emotional cost of performance-based belonging
Outsourcing emotional regulation
The power of pausing before reaching out
How to reconnect with your authentic self
If you’ve ever felt exhausted by social dynamics, or like you’re chasing love that always feels just out of reach, this one’s for you.
In this opening episode, Ali Walker introduces This Is How We Feel - a podcast exploring real-life emotional dilemmas in love, leadership, and learning, and why our feelings matter more than we think.