Wife On The Rocks I Gaslighting, Addiction, Codependency, Al Anon, Alcoholism, Recovery
Christian Alcoholism Relationship Coach, Crisis Parenting Coach
51 episodes
2 weeks ago
Did you marry the man of your dreams, only to find alcohol seeping into every part of your family? As a woman of faith committed to your vows, do you struggle to walk out your convictions amidst the chaos and confusion devastating your marriage? Do you wish you had someone to confide in without judgment, consequences, or the well-meaning but worst advice ever? Despite your relentless efforts, do you feel betrayed, stuck in a cycle, praying for a breakthrough, and wondering if things will really be okay? Same here.
In this podcast, you will find hope regardless of your current situation. Each week, your spirit will be lifted as you recognize you are NOT in this battle alone. You will come to know that only through Him can you learn to model a much-needed peaceful presence to your children, whose little hearts are also wondering if things will be okay. My mission is to share my experience, strength, and hope with women like me who are praying for a breakthrough. The Lord’s light shines even in the darkness of addiction, and the darkness cannot overcome it.
I am a wife, a homeschooling momma, and a woman who has learned that nothing is impossible for God. I sometimes wish that I hadn’t had to learn all of this while enduring circumstances I would rather not have gone through, but would my faith be this strong without the trials? I laugh thinking that while you listen, you might mistakenly assume that I have it “all figured out,” because if I am honest, I still can’t figure out how to keep track of my phone most days. However, I have found a peace that surpasses understanding, and I want to share everything God has taught me with you as you navigate this road. Applying the Bible to my situation allows me to shift my eyes off the problem and refocus on my God who can redeem and restore otherwise hopeless situations. Psalms 55:22 tells us, “Cast your burdens on the Lord and he will sustain you. He will not permit the righteous to be moved.”
In the eye of the storm, it is hard to have the right perspective when you are walking on eggshells every day, trying to keep your family together! I suspect I am not alone here, and if you can relate to anything I have said, then this podcast is for you. Nothing changes if nothing changes, right? :) So, if you are ready to experience a breakthrough, listen up. You do not have to do this alone, and you didn’t find this podcast by accident.
Take a deep breath, even when it seems impossible. Be willing to trust that God can do more than you even imagine, right where you are today, which is so far from where you wanted to be. I know you are running everywhere and doing everything for everyone, but THIS moment of rest is for you! Allow me to serve you a little Peace on the Rocks.
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Did you marry the man of your dreams, only to find alcohol seeping into every part of your family? As a woman of faith committed to your vows, do you struggle to walk out your convictions amidst the chaos and confusion devastating your marriage? Do you wish you had someone to confide in without judgment, consequences, or the well-meaning but worst advice ever? Despite your relentless efforts, do you feel betrayed, stuck in a cycle, praying for a breakthrough, and wondering if things will really be okay? Same here.
In this podcast, you will find hope regardless of your current situation. Each week, your spirit will be lifted as you recognize you are NOT in this battle alone. You will come to know that only through Him can you learn to model a much-needed peaceful presence to your children, whose little hearts are also wondering if things will be okay. My mission is to share my experience, strength, and hope with women like me who are praying for a breakthrough. The Lord’s light shines even in the darkness of addiction, and the darkness cannot overcome it.
I am a wife, a homeschooling momma, and a woman who has learned that nothing is impossible for God. I sometimes wish that I hadn’t had to learn all of this while enduring circumstances I would rather not have gone through, but would my faith be this strong without the trials? I laugh thinking that while you listen, you might mistakenly assume that I have it “all figured out,” because if I am honest, I still can’t figure out how to keep track of my phone most days. However, I have found a peace that surpasses understanding, and I want to share everything God has taught me with you as you navigate this road. Applying the Bible to my situation allows me to shift my eyes off the problem and refocus on my God who can redeem and restore otherwise hopeless situations. Psalms 55:22 tells us, “Cast your burdens on the Lord and he will sustain you. He will not permit the righteous to be moved.”
In the eye of the storm, it is hard to have the right perspective when you are walking on eggshells every day, trying to keep your family together! I suspect I am not alone here, and if you can relate to anything I have said, then this podcast is for you. Nothing changes if nothing changes, right? :) So, if you are ready to experience a breakthrough, listen up. You do not have to do this alone, and you didn’t find this podcast by accident.
Take a deep breath, even when it seems impossible. Be willing to trust that God can do more than you even imagine, right where you are today, which is so far from where you wanted to be. I know you are running everywhere and doing everything for everyone, but THIS moment of rest is for you! Allow me to serve you a little Peace on the Rocks.
Why does drinking seem to escalate every holiday season — and why does it feel so lonely forthe wife watching it happen?
In this episode of Wife on the Rocks, we sit down together for an honest conversation aboutwhy alcoholics often drink more at the holidays and what that increase actually looks likeinside a marriage.
This interview explores:• Why the holidays give alcoholics “permission” to drink more• How alcohol is easier to hide this time of year• Why others don’t notice — but wives always do• The tunnel vision addiction creates, especially around drinking opportunities• How wives are focused on kids, meaning, and traditions while alcohol becomes the priority• Why alcoholics often encourage others to drink to deflect attention• What it feels like for a wife to watch this happen year after year
We also share a personal Christmas story where drinking escalated, an attempt to stop wasmade, and how confusing and painful that experience was for both of us. It’s a raw look at howalcoholism, anxiety, and the pressure of the holidays collide, leaving wives feeling unseenand emotionally abandoned.
If you’ve ever thought:• “Why does he drink so much more right now?”• “Why does no one else seem to notice?”• “Why am I the only one affected by this?”
This episode will help you understand what’s happening beneath the surface — and remind youthat your experience matters.
📩 Have questions or want to be added to the waitlist to work together?Email hello@wifeontherocks.com
🎙️ Listener Q&A episodes coming soon — send your questions anytime.
What happens to holidays as alcoholism progresses?
In this episode of Wife on the Rocks, we share a deeply personal conversation about howalcohol addiction slowly changed our family’s holidays over the years — often in ways we didn’tfully understand at the time.
This is a joint interview with my husband and me, reflecting honestly on:• What holidays looked like before addiction took over• How alcohol slowly pulled him away from family traditions• Why he began opting out, canceling plans, or avoiding holidays altogether• How anxiety and depression intensified as the disease progressed• The grief and confusion wives experience when their spouse emotionally disappears• Why missed holidays are often about addiction — not lack of love
We talk openly about how alcoholism doesn’t just affect drinking — it affects motivation,connection, mental health, and the ability to show up for meaningful moments. As the diseaseprogressed, holidays became overwhelming instead of joyful, leading to isolation, withdrawal,and eventually absence.
If you’ve ever wondered:• “Why doesn’t he want to do holidays anymore?”• “Why am I celebrating alone?”• “Is this depression, anxiety, or alcoholism?”• “Does he even care?”
This episode will help you understand what may really be happening — and remind you thatyou’re not alone, and it’s not your fault.
📩 Have a question or want to share your story? Email hello@wifeontherocks.com
📅 Book a 1:1 coaching session: Email to be added to the wait list for upcoming sessionopportunities!
Do you dread the holidays because money feels out of control — and no matter how hard you plan, budget, or prepare, something always sabotages your efforts? When you're married to someone struggling with alcoholism, the financial stress of the holiday season hits different. You’re trying to manage Christmas gifts, family events, groceries, travel… all while navigating a spouse who is secretly spending, overspending, or using money to support an addiction.
And because both of you aren’t on the same page, you feel like you're doing something wrong — like if you just budgeted better or tried harder, things would work.
But here’s the truth:
👉 You cannot manage money effectively with someone who is also managing their addiction.
👉 You are not failing — alcoholism is destabilizing the home, not you.
👉 You have very little control over financial chaos caused by drinking.
In this episode, we’ll talk about:
• Why holiday money stress is so intense in homes affected by alcoholism
• The emotional shame spiral wives fall into (“Why can’t I fix this?”)
• Why budgeting with an addicted spouse rarely works — and why it’s NOT your fault
• How to release the belief that you’re supposed to “hold it all together”
• A simple truth to anchor in when the financial chaos feels overwhelming
• How understanding lack of shared reality can lift a massive burden off your shoulders
If you’ve ever blamed yourself for financial stress caused by addiction, this episode will help you breathe again.
👉 Questions for the show? Email me at hello@wifeontherocks.com
Search: Financial Infidelity, Money Management, Dave Ramsey, Budgeting
Are you the only functioning parent in your home during the holidays? Do you carry the entire load—planning, preparing, protecting the kids, managing emotions—while your husband’s drinking increases and his presence decreases?
This episode dives into the heartbreaking exhaustion Christian wives face when they are emotionally and practically parenting alone, even though their spouse still lives in the home. You’ll hear why the holidays intensify this burden, why you feel so drained, and why the invisible load you carry is real, valid, and seen by God.
If you’ve ever collapsed into bed thinking, “I can’t hold this together alone,” this episode will meet you right where you are.
📩 Questions: hello@wifeontherocks.com
📅 Book a session: Email to be added to the waiting list.
Are you wondering if your husband’s drinking or behavior has crossed the line from “social” to something more serious? Maybe you’ve ignored the warning signs because you didn’t want to believe you were living with addiction. In this episode, we’re unpacking the red flags of addiction—what they look like in marriage, why we overlook them, and how codependency and love can cloud our judgment.
You’ll learn:
✅ My real definition of addiction—and why it’s not just about how much he drinks or uses.
✅ Why so many wives and partners miss or excuse red flags in early relationships.
✅ Early warning signs that often show up before the problem is fully visible:
• Past attempts at sobriety or rehab stays
• A history of addiction in the family or previous relationships
• Alcohol or drugs present at nearly every social event
• Heavier use than others around him (but hard to see if your circle normalizes drinking)
• Encouraging you to drink or use more than you normally would
We’ll talk about how codependency can disguise itself as love or loyalty—keeping you stuck in denial while addiction quietly takes over your marriage. You’ll also gain biblical insight and emotional tools to start seeing the truth clearly, without shame or fear.
When you understand the red flags of addiction, you can begin replacing confusion with clarity—and take your first step toward peace, wisdom, and recovery for your family.
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Connect & Next Steps
👉 Have a question for a future episode? Email me at hello@wifeontherocks.com
👉 Need personal coaching to spot addiction patterns and end codependent cycles? My 1:1 sessions are open with very limited availability. Feel free to email me if everything is booked and we can see what options we can come up with:)https://calendly.com/wifeontherocks/1hrcoachingsession
If you’ve ever found yourself asking, “How did I get back to this again?” — this episode is for you. That question means you’ve just gone through the cycle of gaslighting — and you may not even realize it.
In this episode, we break down what gaslighting in an alcoholic marriage really looks like, why it’s so powerful, and how it keeps you trapped in a cycle of confusion, guilt, and self-doubt. You’ll learn how to recognize the cycle, accept what’s happening, and take your first steps toward breaking free through truth and faith.
We’ll cover: ✅ What gaslighting is and how it works in addicted or alcoholic relationships ✅ Why gaslighting leaves you feeling crazy, confused, and stuck in repetitive arguments ✅ The spiritual, emotional, and psychological impact of gaslighting on Christian wives ✅ How to recognize when you’re back in the cycle ✅ The secret to freedom: awareness, acceptance, and faith-led action
When you finally see the cycle for what it is, you can stop spinning in it. You can protect your peace, rebuild your confidence, and walk in the clarity that comes from God’s truth — not the lies of addiction.
Want to connect? Email me at hello@wifeontherocks.com
When your husband is struggling with alcohol use, but life still looks mostly normal… it can be incredibly confusing.
He may be:
Holding down a good job
Active in church or community
Present with the kids at times Charming and “fine” around family and friends
And when you express concern?
He says you’re overreacting.
Or that things aren’t that bad.
Or he can stop anytime.
🎯 This is the world of high-functioning alcoholism — where dysfunction hides behind a polished exterior.
You begin to wonder:
Is he really an alcoholic?
Why does his drinking affect me so much?
Am I the problem?
Is this normal for a marriage?
How do I know if his drinking has crossed a line?
In this episode, you’ll learn:
✅ How alcohol reshapes your husband’s brain around compulsion and denial
✅ Why gaslighting and blame-shifting increase over time
✅ How family members slip into codependency and survival roles
✅ Why emotional safety declines even before a crisis hits
✅ Five clarity questions to help you see addiction for what it truly is
Even in seasons where he is “high functioning,” alcohol always creates:
Spiritual disconnection
Emotional unpredictability
Increased anxiety for the whole family
Loss of trust, safety, and intimacy Subtle — but escalating — abuse patterns
You do not need rock-bottom to validate your pain. If alcohol is affecting your peace, your marriage, or your children — it is already too much. Your intuition is a gift. You deserve to see the truth clearly.
💛 You Don’t Have to Walk Through This Alone
If anything resonated, I’d love to support you.
I welcome your questions, stories, and prayer requests.
📩 Email me: hello@wifeontherocks.com 🗓️ Book a clarity coaching session: https://calendly.com/wifeontherocks/1hrcoachingsession
You are not imagining the dysfunction. You are not overreacting. You are not alone.
If your husband is finally getting help for his addiction, you may be wondering: How long should he stay in treatment? 30 days? 60 days? 90 days? Longer? And what does detox have to do with rehab?
Today, we’re breaking down the difference between detox and rehab in a simple, helpful way — and we’ll talk about why staying longer can make a big difference in your husband’s ability to recover well.
Here’s what we cover in this episode:
✅ Detox vs. Rehab — why detox alone isn’t enough.
✅ What actually happens in rehab (it’s not just sitting in a room!).
✅ Why 30 days is often just the beginning of healing.
✅ The brain science behind why staying longer improves recovery outcomes.
✅ How treatment gives wives peace of mind and breathing room.
✅ The tension between missing him at home vs. wanting him to fully heal.
✅ Why this moment is a marathon — not a sprint.
I also share my own experience of what it felt like when my husband was finally in a safe place getting help — the relief, the emotional crash, the grief for my kids — and how I learned to stay focused on the long-term goal, not the quick fix.
Because while it is hard to solo parent and navigate the emotional rollercoaster of treatment… you have prayed for this moment. And now is not the time to rush the healing.
Sobriety isn’t surface-level change. Recovery means going deep enough to face the root. And sometimes… that takes more time.
✨ LAST CALL: Holiday Survival Course
There are 3 live sessions still coming up, and you’ll receive instant access to the first two via recording — plus all the printable resources, homework, and support materials inside the private course hub.
If you want practical support and spiritual strength throughout this holiday season, I’d love to help you stay grounded in God’s peace and protect what matters most.
👉 Join the Holiday Survival Course here: https://calendly.com/wifeontherocks/holiday-survival-course.
💌 Have a question for a future episode or want to share what God is doing in your life? Email me anytime at: hello@wifeontherocks.com
Need personal support? 1:1 coaching spots are open now — link in the show notes to schedule! https://calendly.com/wifeontherocks/1hrcoachingsession
You’re not alone in this, friend. There is hope — and healing — even here. Take a breath. Let’s walk this together. 💛
Have you ever asked yourself, “If he really loved us, why won’t he stop drinking?”
You’re not alone. So many Christian wives live in this painful confusion—trying to love, pray, and reason their way through addiction, only to feel rejected, unloved and unseen.
In this episode of Wife on the Rocks, we unpack the truth about the addicted brain and why love alone can’t undo addiction. You’ll hear:
✅ Why addiction hijacks the brain’s survival system—and why it’s not a matter of willpower or love.✅ How logic and heartfelt pleas fall short when the brain is controlled by substance dependence.✅ Why advice from people who don’t understand addiction often hurts more than it helps.✅ A personal story of the naive stage of early addiction and how we think we can snap them out of it, but realizing that his addiction is stronger than we think. ✅ What it means to pray for your husband’s eyes to be opened by God in His timing.
Understanding this doesn’t make it easier—but it helped me stop taking the pain personally. There is always hope, because God is still working behind the scenes in ways you can’t see.
IT IS NOT TOO LATE!Join the Holiday Survival Course, created for wives of alcoholics who want to identify the options you have in situations, set boundaries with grace, and focus on God’s presence in the midst of the chaos. Special Holiday Course, BUT the tools you learn are applied year-long! 👉 Click here to join the Holiday Survival Course:
https://calendly.com/wifeontherocks/holiday-survival-course
📩 Have a question you’d like answered in a future episode? Want to share anything with me? Email hello@wifeontherocks.com.
Have you ever found yourself drawn into a heated or emotional conversation with your husband after he’s been drinking—only to regret it the next day when he doesn’t remember, denies it happened, or twists your words? In this episode of Wife on the Rocks, we’ll talk about why refusing to engage in conversation when alcohol is involved is not cold or controlling—it’s wise, protective, and biblical. Learn about the ONE boundary that I had to set in our home when addiction was taking over everything! Come along on this journey where co-dependency develops boundaries to deal with alcoholism in a way that can protect in the hard moments of gaslighting and conversations that spiral quickly!
You’ll learn:
Why alcohol changes how people hear and process words.
The logic behind disengaging (you wouldn’t debate with someone who’s not in their right mind).
Why engaging feels like betraying yourself—and how to stop.
What to do instead of arguing or trying to reason.
How faith and boundaries can coexist without shame or guilt.
If you’ve ever felt stuck between silence and chaos, desiring to have a close relationship rooted in healthy communication, but instead wind up in an argument that goes nowhere, this episode will help you choose peace—and know that walking away doesn’t mean giving up. It is an essential boundary at times to protect your heart.
👉 Join the Holiday Survival Course to learn practical ways to navigate this season.
https://calendly.com/wifeontherocks/holiday-survival-course
We are not helpless in this cycle, although it often feels that way, there are many things that we can be doing to walk in peace TODAY. Everything that I talk about on the Podcast and SO MUCH MORE!! The best part is that I am teaching LIVE for these 5 weeks and with interactive components, you can reach out for help and support as we go along! At the end of the 5 weeks you will have worked through the common traps this time of year and have built a plan specific for your family that you can rely on any day of the year!
It is like having the podcast (and me) in your pocket. Encouragement for 5 weeks straight!! Wrapped in beautiful paper and tied with a bow. A GIFT for YOU this Christmas!!
1) Guarding your mind from Gaslighting and walking in Truth
2) Recognize unhealthy patterns and how to break them
3) Parenting Challenges, A Child’s Perspective, Traditions and Scheduling
4) Boundaries that WORK for YOUR family
5) Protecting your mind from the mental spiral on the hard days
Don’t walk this path alone again! Find support, connection, and hope as we navigate the unpredicatability together, build a road map that works for your family, and have a plan designed especially for YOU in the moments that are too painful for words. Get your Hot Cocoa and snuggly blanket and let’s talk about how this year could look different!
Course begins in ONE Week on October 21st. Click here for full details and to grab your seat!!
https://calendly.com/wifeontherocks/holiday-survival-course
👉 Need personalized support? Book a 1:1 coaching session!
https://calendly.com/wifeontherocks/1hrcoachingsession
Send your questions to hello@wifeontherocks.com. There are a few spots left before Thanksgiving!
Have you ever walked away from a conversation with your husband and thought, “Am I crazy?”You’re not. You may be experiencing gaslighting—one of the most confusing and painful behaviors that often shows up in alcoholic marriages.
In this episode of Wife on the Rocks, we’re going back to the basics. You’ll learn what gaslighting really is, how it makes you doubt your memory and emotions, and why it leaves you feeling like you can’t trust yourself.
We’ll talk about:✅ How alcohol and denial fuel gaslighting in relationships✅ Common gaslighting phrases and how they twist reality✅ Why the constant confusion is not your fault✅ How to start reclaiming your peace and confidence through truth and faith
If you’ve ever questioned your own sanity because of the chaos around you, this episode will help you breathe again and find peace through God’s truth.
✨ Ready to find peace through the holidays?Join my Holiday Survival Course, a 5-week experience BEGINNING OCTOBER 21 designed to help wives of alcoholics stay grounded, set boundaries with grace, and walk in peace this holiday season. You DO NOT have to walk through it this year alone!! I want to dive deeper with you and share with you what I have learned that has helped me to survive the most beautiful.......and sometimes the most painful part of the year for our family ♥
👉Click here to learn more and join the Holiday Survival Course: https://calendly.com/wifeontherocks/holiday-survival-course
📩 Have a question you’d like me to answer in a future episode? Email me at hello@wifeontherocks.com
💬 My 1:1 coaching sessions are open with limited availability—Click here to schedule a one-on-one session or consider joinging the Holiday Survival Course linked above to meet with me ASAP inside the course! https://calendly.com/wifeontherocks/1hrcoachingsession
Has your husband quit drinking, but the chaos, anger, or dysfunction in your home hasn’t gone away? Many Christian wives find themselves asking: “If he’s not drinking, why doesn’t life feel better?” Sobriety and recovery are not the same thing, and understanding the difference can bring clarity, peace, and direction.
In this episode of Wife on the Rocks, we’ll talk about:
Why simply stopping alcohol isn’t the same as living in recovery.
Common patterns of “dry drunk” behavior and how they impact the family.
What real transformation looks like beyond putting down the bottle.
Encouragement from Scripture
If you’ve been questioning whether your husband’s sobriety is real—or wondering why things still feel broken—this episode will help you spot the difference and anchor your hope in the One who truly restores.
👉 Submit any questions to hello@wifeontherocks.com
👉 Book a 1:1 coaching session https://calendly.com/wifeontherocks/1hrcoachingsession
👉Come Hang Out With Me For The Holiday Survival Course LIVE October 2025
https://calendly.com/wifeontherocks/holiday-survival-course
✨ Dreaming of a picture-perfect holiday, only to feel the weight of alcohol seeping into the season instead? You’re not alone. That’s why I created the Holiday Survival Course — a 5-week live small group where we’ll work together on building a thoughtful plan to help you navigate the holidays with more stability, peace, and faith.
I can’t promise everything will go smoothly — but I can give you tools to steady yourself in the unpredictability, protect your peace, and keep your heart anchored in Christ when things get hard.
We’ll meet on Zoom Tuesdays, October 21 through November 18, wrapping up just before Thanksgiving. Space is limited.
👉 Reserve your seat here: https://calendly.com/wifeontherocks/holiday-survival-course
Does your husband push back when you mention Al-Anon—or accuse it of being “husband bashing”? You’re not alone. Many Christian wives long for support but feel trapped when their spouse doesn’t approve. In this episode of Wife on the Rocks, we’ll talk honestly about the struggle of wanting help with addiction and alcoholism while facing resistance at home.
You’ll hear:
Why secrecy feels like lying, but sometimes becomes survival when you need support.
The truth about what Al-Anon really is (and isn’t).
Online meeting options through the Al-Anon app and other accessible resources.
Alternative programs and supports that can meet the same needs.
How coaching or courses (like my upcoming fall program) can give you faith-based support without secrecy.
You don’t have to choose between honoring your marriage and getting the help you need. The gaslighting of him saying that there isn't an issue in the first place and trying to make that make sense with what you are experiencing.......This conversation will help you sort through your options and move forward in wisdom and peace.
👉 Submit your questions for future episodes at hello@wifeontherocks.com
👉 Want personalized support? Book a 1:1 coaching session right here https://calendly.com/wifeontherocks/1hrcoachingsession
Curious about the fall course I am opening - Holiday Survival Course- email me to check out details and get on the waiting list! hello@wifeontherocks.com
Are you ever unsure if your actions are helping your alcoholic husband—or actually enabling him? Many Christian wives fall into codependent patterns without realizing it, believing they are loving, protecting, or supporting their spouse. But what feels like care can quietly fuel addiction and rob you of peace.
In this episode of Wife on the Rocks, we’ll explore what codependency really is, how to recognize enabling behaviors, and compare the dictionary definition with my personal definition. Together, we’ll look at the common patterns wives fall into, why they don’t work, and what I am in charge of compared to what I am not.
You’ll hear:
The difference between helping and enabling in addiction.
Common enabling behaviors like monitoring, covering, or rescuing—and why they backfire.
The emotional toll of codependency (guilt, exhaustion, dysfunction).
How to grieve what you hoped for in marriage while feeling guilty for not continuing the cycle.
Simple first steps to begin breaking free from enabling patterns. Ask yourself this question.
If you’ve ever thought, “Am I helping him or just making things worse?”, this episode will bring clarity and hope for your journey as a Christian wife walking through addiction.
👉 Submit your questions for a future episode at hello@wifeontherocks.com.
👉 Want personalized support? My fall 1:1 coaching sessions are now open. Book directly here: https://calendly.com/wifeontherocks/1hrcoachingsession
When you’re married to an alcoholic, it feels almost impossible not to keep watch over his drinking. Maybe you’ve counted bottles, checked the liquor cabinet, or tracked every sip at dinner—hoping that if you could just measure the problem, you could somehow control it.
In this episode, we’ll talk about why monitoring an alcoholic’s drinking doesn’t work and how it keeps you trapped in a cycle of anxiety, hypervigilance, and codependency. Addiction hijacks the brain, and no amount of checking or policing can make your husband choose sobriety. His recovery is his responsibility—not yours.
You’ll learn:
Why watching his every move fuels your fear instead of giving peace.
How addiction and alcoholism shift accountability away from him when you try to manage it.
The emotional cost of living like a detective in your own home.
What it looks like to release control and reclaim your peace in Christ.
If you’ve ever thought, “Maybe if I just keep track, I can get ahead of this,” this episode will show you a healthier way forward. Your husband’s sobriety is not your responsibility—but your peace, your healing, and your walk with God are.
📩 Do you have a question you’d like me to cover on a future episode? Email me at hello@wifeontherocks.com.
📅 Want to go deeper? My one-on-one coaching sessions are open now. Book here → (Temporarily unavailable. Email the above address and we will set a time:)
When gaslighting leaves you questioning your reality and your worth, it’s easy to spiral into anger, defensiveness, or despair. As wives, we long for our husbands to meet our emotional needs, but the truth is—no spouse can carry that weight fully. And when addiction and gaslighting are present, the gap feels even bigger than we ever imagined.
In this episode, I share how I’ve learned to regulate my emotions in the face of hurtful, confusing words. You’ll hear:
Why it’s dangerous to seek validation from a spouse who cannot give it.
Practical ways to counteract gaslighting without losing your peace.
How knowing who I am in Christ steadies me when my marriage feels like less than I ever expected.
Why Galatians 5:22 reminds me that the Holy Spirit equips me with self-control—even when I’m tempted to lash back in anger.
If you’ve ever thought, “I didn’t sign up for this—I expected so much more,” this episode will give you encouragement and practical tools to hold your ground in truth and respond with Spirit-led self-control.
📩 Do you have a question you’d like me to cover in a future episode, or a testimony of what God is doing in your life? Does your husband have a question for my husband? We are working on building our next interviews! Email me at hello@wifeontherocks.com
📅 If you’re ready for personal support, fall one-on-one coaching sessions are open now. Book directly here → https://calendly.com/wifeontherocks/1hrcoachingsession
Living with alcoholism in your marriage can leave you feeling like the weight of the world is on your shoulders. The lies, broken promises, and constant chaos can make you wonder if hope is even possible. If you’ve ever whispered, “I can’t keep doing this,” this episode is for you.
In today’s conversation, I share 3 Christ-centered, practical tips to help you take one small step forward when you feel hopeless and defeated. These aren’t about fixing your husband—they’re about helping you anchor your heart, care for yourself, and invite God into the exhaustion.
You’ll learn:
Where your hope belongs when his choices keep breaking it.
Simple acts of self-care that bring life back into your day—like stepping outside in the sunshine, turning on praise music, or moving your body to clear the heaviness.
How to invite God into your weariness, trusting Him to carry what feels impossible.
Hopelessness doesn’t mean you’ve failed—it means you need fresh ways to steady your soul in Christ. With Him, you can take the next step, even in the storm.
📩 Do you have a question you’d like me to cover on the show, or a testimony of how God is meeting you in this journey? Email me at hello@wifeontherocks.com.📅 If you’re ready for personal support and a safe space to process your next steps, my one-on-one summer coaching sessions are open now. Book directly here → https://calendly.com/wifeontherocks/1hrcoachingsession
Addiction, Co-Dependency, Boundaries, Alcoholic, Marriage, Hope
Sometimes it’s hard to tell the difference between a healthy boundary and one that only sounds right on the surface. Boundaries are like real vs. counterfeit money—you need to know what the genuine thing “sounds” like in order to recognize when something is off.
In this episode, I’m sharing examples of both unhealthy and healthy boundaries side by side so you can hear the difference for yourself. Poorly stated boundaries often come out of anger, sound controlling, or place the accountability on you instead of where it belongs. Healthy boundaries, on the other hand, are calm, clear, and protective without trying to control another person’s choices.
You’ll learn:
Why tone and phrasing matter more than you might realize—especially when you’re dealing with alcoholism, addiction, or gaslighting at home.
Why practice builds confidence in speaking boundaries that actually work.
How a “bad boundary” sounds compared to a “good boundary”—so you can stop feeling stuck and start protecting your peace.
If you’ve ever thought, “My boundaries sound right, so why don’t they work?”—this episode will help you start spotting the difference. Whether you’re navigating life with an alcoholic spouse, recovering from the effects of addiction, or learning how to respond to gaslighting, you’ll find practical insight and encouragement here.
👉 Have a question you’d like me to cover in a future episode? Email me at hello@wifeontherocks.com
👉 Want help practicing boundaries that actually work? My one-on-one summer coaching sessions are open now → https://calendly.com/wifeontherocks/1hrcoachingsession
When you’re living in the chaos of an alcoholic marriage, boundaries aren’t just helpful—they’re essential. But here’s the thing: not all boundaries are created equal. Some can actually cause more damage, fuel defensiveness, or leave you carrying all the accountability.
In this episode, I’m sharing three specific things I don’t do when I set boundaries—habits I’ve learned to leave behind so my boundaries are clear, effective, and truly protective for me and my family.
We’ll talk about how to avoid the traps that make boundaries backfire, and how to phrase them in ways that lower defensiveness instead of triggering it. Listen in to hear exactly what these three things are and how you can start shifting your approach today.
If you’ve been struggling to set boundaries that actually work, this is for you.
📩 Got a boundary question you’d like me to answer on the show? Email me at hello@wifeontherocks.com.
📅 Want to work with me 1-on-1 this summer to create boundaries that bring clarity and peace? The link to my schedule is in the show notes—book your session directly today. https://calendly.com/wifeontherocks/1hrcoachingsession
Setting boundaries in a marriage impacted by addiction is hard enough—but what happens when we set boundaries that backfire?
In this episode, we’re walking through 4 common boundary mistakes Christian wives often make when navigating life with an alcoholic spouse:
Boundaries made in anger – when emotions take over and clarity is lost
Not following through – the emotional toll of boundaries that don’t stick
Poorly communicated boundaries – the best of intentions, but instantly the defensiveness shows up from hubby!
Controlling boundaries – These sounded so good in my head, but only caused fights and a cycle of NO change.
You’ll hear real-life examples of what these mistakes look like in the home—and how to reframe them with love, clarity, and biblical wisdom. Plus, I’ll show you how to spot the difference between a boundary that punishes and one that protects.
💬 Have a question you’d like answered on the show? Or want to share something God is doing in your life? I’d love to hear from you. Email me at hello@wifeontherocks.com.
📅 Ready for support? If you’d like help setting boundaries that bring peace—not chaos—I offer one-on-one sessions designed just for wives in addicted marriages.👉 Click here to book a session: https://calendly.com/wifeontherocks/1hrcoachingsession
Wife On The Rocks I Gaslighting, Addiction, Codependency, Al Anon, Alcoholism, Recovery
Did you marry the man of your dreams, only to find alcohol seeping into every part of your family? As a woman of faith committed to your vows, do you struggle to walk out your convictions amidst the chaos and confusion devastating your marriage? Do you wish you had someone to confide in without judgment, consequences, or the well-meaning but worst advice ever? Despite your relentless efforts, do you feel betrayed, stuck in a cycle, praying for a breakthrough, and wondering if things will really be okay? Same here.
In this podcast, you will find hope regardless of your current situation. Each week, your spirit will be lifted as you recognize you are NOT in this battle alone. You will come to know that only through Him can you learn to model a much-needed peaceful presence to your children, whose little hearts are also wondering if things will be okay. My mission is to share my experience, strength, and hope with women like me who are praying for a breakthrough. The Lord’s light shines even in the darkness of addiction, and the darkness cannot overcome it.
I am a wife, a homeschooling momma, and a woman who has learned that nothing is impossible for God. I sometimes wish that I hadn’t had to learn all of this while enduring circumstances I would rather not have gone through, but would my faith be this strong without the trials? I laugh thinking that while you listen, you might mistakenly assume that I have it “all figured out,” because if I am honest, I still can’t figure out how to keep track of my phone most days. However, I have found a peace that surpasses understanding, and I want to share everything God has taught me with you as you navigate this road. Applying the Bible to my situation allows me to shift my eyes off the problem and refocus on my God who can redeem and restore otherwise hopeless situations. Psalms 55:22 tells us, “Cast your burdens on the Lord and he will sustain you. He will not permit the righteous to be moved.”
In the eye of the storm, it is hard to have the right perspective when you are walking on eggshells every day, trying to keep your family together! I suspect I am not alone here, and if you can relate to anything I have said, then this podcast is for you. Nothing changes if nothing changes, right? :) So, if you are ready to experience a breakthrough, listen up. You do not have to do this alone, and you didn’t find this podcast by accident.
Take a deep breath, even when it seems impossible. Be willing to trust that God can do more than you even imagine, right where you are today, which is so far from where you wanted to be. I know you are running everywhere and doing everything for everyone, but THIS moment of rest is for you! Allow me to serve you a little Peace on the Rocks.
