In this episode, Roy and Jacqueline discuss the common 'Pursuer-Avoider Cycle' that many couples face after sexual infidelity and betrayal trauma. They share personal experiences, practical strategies, and deep insights on how to break free from this cycle. Learn how to identify primary and secondary emotions, and discover actionable steps for both pursuers and avoiders to foster healing and connection. Tune in to gain valuable advice and find hope in your recovery journey. 00:00 Introduction and Welcome 00:39 Personal Story: Remodeling Challenges 02:16 Understanding the Pursuer-Avoider Cycle 07:51 The Pursuer's Perspective 10:57 The Avoider's Perspective 25:07 Breaking the Cycle: Practical Steps 34:51 Conclusion and Weekly Challenge   Free Assessment: Is the Recovery Real? 9 Vital Questions for Addicts & Partners - https://www.joy-recovery.com/real-recovery Free Newsletter: joy-recovery.com Coaching: https://www.joy-recovery.com/coaching Groups: https://www.joy-recovery.com/groups YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/@JoyRecovery

In today's episode, we explore how understanding the shadow and false self impacts our spiritual and personal growth. Learn about practical spiritual practices such as the daily examen, solitude and silence, seeking feedback in community, and confession. These practices help dismantle the false self and expose the shadow, facilitating healing and transformation. Join us as we provide deep insights and strategies to help you step into your true identity, rooted in love and anchored in a relationship with God. 00:00 Introduction and Welcome 00:38 The Shadow and the False Self 04:11 God's Invitation to Transformation 05:03 Spiritual Practices for Healing 08:48 The Daily Examen 13:31 Solitude and Silence 21:33 The Power of Community and Feedback 29:17 The Practice of Confession 36:56 Conclusion and Final Thoughts Free Assessment: Is the Recovery Real? 9 Vital Questions for Addicts & Partners - https://www.joy-recovery.com/real-recovery Free Newsletter: joy-recovery.com Coaching: https://www.joy-recovery.com/coaching Groups: https://www.joy-recovery.com/groups YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/@JoyRecovery

In this episode, we delve deep into the complexities couples face when recovering from sexual infidelity and betrayal trauma. We explore the nature of intrusive thoughts, differentiating them from fantasies, and discuss why daily confession of these thoughts can be more harmful than helpful. Learn how to build healthful accountability, understand the neuroscience behind intrusive thoughts, and discover a path that fosters genuine healing and intimacy. Join us as we provide clarity, compassion, and tools for recovery that support both partners while building trust and safety in the relationship. Don't forget to subscribe, like, and leave a five-star review to help others find our supportive community! 00:00 Introduction and Welcome 00:37 Understanding Intrusive Thoughts 01:20 Daily Confession: Intentions and Impact 02:16 Clearing Misconceptions About Intrusive Thoughts 06:46 Intrusive Thoughts vs. Fantasy 12:08 The Harmful Cycle of Daily Confession 25:49 Healthy Accountability and Boundaries 33:12 Conclusion and Final Thoughts

In this episode of Joy Recovery Radio, we delve into the profound question, 'Why can't I have a normal life again?' after sexual infidelity and betrayal trauma. We explore the deep-rooted longing for normalcy, the illusion of the old 'normal', and the true meaning of freedom and recovery. Whether you're the betrayed partner or the one recovering from addiction, this episode offers valuable insights and practical strategies for rebuilding a life of honesty, integrity, and connection. Join us for real stories, expert advice, and compassionate support on your journey to healing. Visit Joy-Recovery.com for personalized recovery coaching and supportive groups. 00:00 Introduction to Joy Recovery Radio 00:39 The Struggle for a 'Normal' Life in Recovery 01:50 Understanding the Illusion of 'Normal' 03:54 The Reality of Recovery 07:25 The Partner's Perspective on Betrayal 12:02 Building a New Normal Together 15:22 Redefining Masculinity and Freedom 18:41 The Path to True Freedom and Peace 22:20 Encouragement for Betrayed Partners 24:20 Conclusion and Final Thoughts   Free Assessment: Is the Recovery Real? 9 Vital Questions for Addicts & Partners - https://www.joy-recovery.com/real-recovery Free Newsletter: joy-recovery.com Coaching: https://www.joy-recovery.com/coaching Groups: https://www.joy-recovery.com/groups YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/@JoyRecovery

In this episode, we explore the complexities of healing from sexual infidelity and betrayal trauma. Join us as we delve into the psychology and theology of objectification, the impact of addiction and betrayal on relationships, and practical steps for recovery. Learn how to rebuild trust, restore value, and find true intimacy. Whether you are battling addiction, healing from betrayal, or rebuilding your relationship, we offer insights and support to guide you on your journey. Visit joy-recovery.com for personalized coaching and supportive groups. 00:00 Introduction to Joy Recovery Radio 00:37 Understanding Value and Objectification 04:58 The Psychology of Objectification 07:29 Theology and Recovery 12:35 Betrayal Trauma and Rehumanization 15:31 Practical Steps for Recovery 27:16 Revaluing Your Partner's Healing 32:48 Conclusion and Support Resources   Free Assessment: Is the Recovery Real? 9 Vital Questions for Addicts & Partners - https://www.joy-recovery.com/real-recovery Free Newsletter: joy-recovery.com Coaching: https://www.joy-recovery.com/coaching Groups: https://www.joy-recovery.com/groups YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/@JoyRecovery

In this episode, we delve into the profound impact of spiritual practices on healing and transformation, particularly for couples facing sexual infidelity and betrayal trauma. Host shares insights on how stories, relationships, and habits shape us, and explores the power of spiritual practices like prayer, fasting, and community. Discover how to train, not just try, for lasting change and inner peace. Tune in for practical strategies, real stories, and spiritual wisdom that can transform your life from the inside out. Subscribe, like, and review to help us reach more people who need this message of hope. 00:00 Introduction and Welcome 00:38 Understanding Spiritual Formation 01:19 The Role of Stories, Relationships, and Habits 02:50 Replacing Old Influences with Spiritual Practices 04:50 Historical Perspective on Psychology and Spirituality 09:33 Deep Dive into Spiritual Practices 26:31 Practical Guidelines for Spiritual Practices 33:14 The Importance of Repetition and Patience 35:10 A Story of Lifelong Spiritual Practice 40:30 Conclusion and Invitation Free Assessment: Is the Recovery Real? 9 Vital Questions for Addicts & Partners - https://www.joy-recovery.com/real-recovery Free Newsletter: joy-recovery.com Coaching: https://www.joy-recovery.com/coaching Groups: https://www.joy-recovery.com/groups YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/@JoyRecovery  

In this episode, we explore how to experience holistic transformation by understanding the five integrated parts of the human person: spirit, mind, body, relationships, and soul. We discuss the importance of intentional spiritual formation, the impact of passive and active influences on our lives, and practical strategies for countering unintentional habits and negative stories. Join us as we dive deep into the transformational practices of teaching, spiritual disciplines, and community support, all centered around the presence and power of a higher power. For personalized coaching and supportive groups, visit joy-recovery.com. Don't forget to subscribe for more insights and real stories to support your healing journey. Choose joy! 00:00 Introduction to Joy Recovery Radio 00:39 Understanding Human Transformation 02:44 The Five Integrated Parts of a Human 02:51 The Role of the Spirit 04:09 The Role of the Mind 05:15 The Role of the Body 05:57 The Role of Relationships 07:45 The Role of the Soul 08:29 Interconnectedness of Human Parts 09:21 Intentional Spiritual Formation 18:57 Countering Stories with Teaching 22:44 Countering Habits with Practices 29:12 Countering Relationships with Community 31:54 The Role of God's Spirit in Transformation 34:17 Self-Improvement vs. Surrender 43:10 The Cost of Transformation 44:55 Conclusion and Final Thoughts Free Assessment: Is the Recovery Real? 9 Vital Questions for Addicts & Partners - https://www.joy-recovery.com/real-recovery Free Newsletter: joy-recovery.com Coaching: https://www.joy-recovery.com/coaching Groups: https://www.joy-recovery.com/groups YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/@JoyRecovery  

In this episode, we explore whether the advice to 'be yourself' is beneficial and delve into the concept of spiritual formation. Learn about the stories we believe, the habits we practice, and the relationships that shape us. We'll also discuss how to break free from addiction and grow into our best selves through spiritual renewal. Whether you're an addict or a betrayed partner, our community and strategies aim to provide the support you need for transformation and recovery. 00:00 Introduction and Community Engagement 00:39 The Concept of 'Being Yourself' 02:00 Inner Conflict and Multiple Selves 04:42 Paul's Ancient Letter on Inner Conflict 09:27 Spiritual Formation and Transformation 11:38 Presence, Pattern, and Practice 14:01 The Drift: Passive Spiritual Formation 18:11 Cultural Narratives and Their Impact on Men 22:48 Cultural Narratives and Their Impact on Women 26:32 Support and Resources for Recovery 26:54 Jesus' Invitation to Women 27:55 The Impact of Pornography 29:01 Cultural Influences on Sexuality 33:27 The Power of Habits 37:56 The Influence of Relationships 42:24 The Role of Experiences 44:35 A Personal Transformation Story 49:53 Conclusion and Next Steps   Free Assessment: Is the Recovery Real? 9 Vital Questions for Addicts & Partners - https://www.joy-recovery.com/real-recovery Free Newsletter: joy-recovery.com Coaching: https://www.joy-recovery.com/coaching Groups: https://www.joy-recovery.com/groups YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/@JoyRecovery

In this episode of Joy Recovery Radio, we explore the critical difference between truth and transparency in the journey to healing after sexual infidelity and betrayal trauma. Our hosts discuss the importance of proactive transparency versus reactive truth, and how these approaches impact trust and emotional intimacy in relationships. Through real-life examples and practical strategies, we aim to equip couples with the tools needed to rebuild their connection. Join us as we delve into how transparency fosters trust, supports emotional intimacy, and transforms relationships. For more support, visit Joy-Recovery.com. 00:00 Introduction and Welcome 00:44 Meet the Hosts 01:29 Family Update 02:05 Understanding Transparency 04:36 Truth vs. Transparency Simulation 12:42 Results of Transparency 21:17 Tools for Practicing Transparency 24:36 Conclusion and Final Thoughts   Free Assessment: Is the Recovery Real? 9 Vital Questions for Addicts & Partners - https://www.joy-recovery.com/real-recovery Free Newsletter: joy-recovery.com Coaching: https://www.joy-recovery.com/coaching Groups: https://www.joy-recovery.com/groups YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/@JoyRecovery

In this episode, we delve into the fascinating connection between brain science and spiritual principles in the journey to overcome porn addiction. Discover how your brain works like a computer, capable of pruning unwanted habits while nurturing healthy ones. Learn practical strategies for rewiring your brain, supported by both scientific insights and biblical wisdom. We also share inspiring real-life stories and offer actionable steps for recovery. Join us and explore how to find true freedom from unwanted mental patterns and reclaim joy in your life. Don't forget to like, subscribe, and leave a five-star review if you find this content helpful! 00:00 Introduction to Joy Recovery Radio 00:45 The Brain's Delete Button 02:22 Understanding Synaptic Pruning 08:30 The Impact of Porn on the Brain 21:31 Practical Steps for Recovery 25:04 Conclusion and Encouragement   Free Assessment: Is the Recovery Real? 9 Vital Questions for Addicts & Partners - https://www.joy-recovery.com/real-recovery Free Newsletter: joy-recovery.com Coaching: https://www.joy-recovery.com/coaching Groups: https://www.joy-recovery.com/groups YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/@JoyRecovery

In this episode, we dive deep into the concept of becoming a non-anxious presence during the challenging journey of recovery from sexual infidelity and betrayal trauma. We discuss the profound insights from Edwin Friedman's leadership theories and how they apply to emotional and spiritual regression in the modern world. Discover how a non-anxious presence can break the cycle of anxiety driven by reactivity, blame, and quick-fix mentalities. Learn from psychological theories like attachment, trauma response, and systems theory, and see how they align with spiritual practices reflected in scripture. Tune in to find practical strategies, real stories, and the deep connection between behavioral science and faith. Transform your recovery journey with us today! 00:00 Introduction to Joy Recovery Radio 00:45 Understanding the Devastation of Betrayal 01:21 Becoming a Non-Anxious Presence 03:02 Edwin Friedman's Insights on Anxiety 06:45 The Five Ways Anxiety Spirals 13:21 Psychology of a Non-Anxious Presence 17:11 Scriptural Guidance on Non-Anxious Presence 28:12 The Secret Place and Spiritual Practices 34:35 Conclusion and Final Thoughts   Free Assessment: Is the Recovery Real? 9 Vital Questions for Addicts & Partners - https://www.joy-recovery.com/real-recovery Free Newsletter: joy-recovery.com Coaching: https://www.joy-recovery.com/coaching Groups: https://www.joy-recovery.com/groups YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/@JoyRecovery

Welcome back to Joy Recovery Radio! In today's episode, we delve deep into the transformative and challenging journey of forgiveness, especially in the wake of sexual infidelity and betrayal trauma. Hear real stories, practical strategies, and insights on how forgiveness can change your life. Listen as we tackle common misconceptions about forgiveness and explore its different dimensions—whether it's forgiving others, yourself, life, or even God. Discover how to release anger, bitterness, and resentment to find true healing and freedom. Join us as we share how to navigate this delicate yet powerful practice and turn pain into purpose. Remember to visit joy-recovery.com for personalized coaching and supportive groups. Don't forget to like, subscribe, and leave a five-star review on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, or YouTube to help more people discover our community when they need it most. 00:00 Introduction to Joy Recovery Radio 00:43 The Power and Challenge of Forgiveness 01:23 Personal Reflections on Betrayal and Forgiveness 03:11 Understanding True Forgiveness 06:08 Defining Forgiveness: What It Is and Isn't 11:12 The Two Levels of Forgiveness 17:34 The Four Dimensions of Forgiveness 26:03 Transforming Pain into Purpose 35:14 Reflective Questions and Conclusion Free Assessment: Is the Recovery Real? 9 Vital Questions for Addicts & Partners - https://www.joy-recovery.com/real-recovery Free Newsletter: joy-recovery.com Coaching: https://www.joy-recovery.com/coaching Groups: https://www.joy-recovery.com/groups YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/@JoyRecovery  

This episode is dedicated to helping couples recover from sexual infidelity and betrayal trauma. We explain how partners in recovery can proactively create safety to rebuild trust. Discover practical strategies and mindset shifts necessary to overcome the trauma and create a new, healthier relationship. Hear about the importance of transparency, accountability, and humility along with real-life examples and analogies. For more support, visit us at Joy-Recovery.com. Choose joy today!   00:00 Introduction and Welcome   00:44 Understanding the Early Phases of Rebuilding Trust   02:29 The Necessity of Power Transfer in Relationships   04:58 Practical Steps to Supply Safety   07:27 Reframing the Concept of Imprisonment   18:09 Encouragement and Final Thoughts   19:24 Conclusion and Resources   Free Assessment: Is the Recovery Real? 9 Vital Questions for Addicts & Partners - https://www.joy-recovery.com/real-recovery Free Newsletter: joy-recovery.com Coaching: https://www.joy-recovery.com/coaching Groups: https://www.joy-recovery.com/groups YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/@JoyRecovery

Welcome to Joy Recovery Radio! In this episode, we delve into the complexities of emotional intelligence in recovering from sexual infidelity and betrayal trauma. We share insights from a webinar on Emotional Intelligence, exploring the concept of 'airplane mode' in addiction and how to re-engage emotionally. Learn about the Circumplex Model of Emotions, the power of recognizing and labeling emotions, the pitfalls of smartphone dependency, and tools like the 'How We Feel' app to track and manage your emotions. Join us as we discuss effective strategies for self-regulation, co-regulation with partners, and the critical importance of expressing emotions. Discover methods to build empathy, reduce compulsive behaviors, and foster deep, authentic connections. Whether you're battling addiction, healing from betrayal, or rebuilding a relationship, this episode offers practical steps and compassionate support. Choose joy and start your journey to emotional sobriety and relational intimacy today!   00:00 Welcome to Joy Recovery Radio 00:51 Living in Airplane Mode: Suppressing Emotions   02:33 Recognizing Emotions: The First Step   14:08 Understanding Emotions: Becoming an Emotion Scientist   17:11 Labeling Emotions: Expanding Your Emotional Vocabulary   23:24 Understanding Anxiety and Fear   23:44 Defining Pressure and Its Sources   24:13 Personalized Recovery Coaching   24:35 Introducing the How We Feel App   26:39 Expressing Emotions Healthily   27:18 The Importance of Vulnerability   30:18 Tools for Emotional Expression   34:49 Regulating Emotions   38:58 Co-Regulating with Your Partner   42:48 The Relationship Between Thoughts and Emotions   43:43 Practicing Intimacy Skills   45:21 Conclusion and Resources     Free Assessment: Is the Recovery Real? 9 Vital Questions for Addicts & Partners - https://www.joy-recovery.com/real-recovery Free Newsletter: joy-recovery.com Coaching: https://www.joy-recovery.com/coaching Groups: https://www.joy-recovery.com/groups YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/@JoyRecovery    

Join us on Joy Recovery Radio as we explore the journey of healing and hope after sexual infidelity and betrayal trauma. This episode delves into the transformative power of the 12-step program, inspired by the Beatitudes, and how these spiritual practices can restore brokenness and lead to a more abundant life. Learn how intimate connection with God, self, and others plays a critical role in recovery. We also discuss the importance of spiritual awakening and grace, as well as insights from letters between Carl Jung and the founder of AA. Don't miss this enlightening conversation—subscribe now to stay connected!   00:00 Introduction and Welcome 00:42 Personal Confession and the 12 Steps 01:56 The Human Condition and Addictions 04:05 Jeremiah's Insight on Addiction 05:46 The Search for Fulfillment 11:55 Carl Jung and the Spiritual Awakening 19:12 The Beatitudes and the 12 Steps 31:19 The Journey of Recovery   Free Assessment: Is the Recovery Real? 9 Vital Questions for Addicts & Partners - https://www.joy-recovery.com/real-recovery Free Newsletter: joy-recovery.com Coaching: https://www.joy-recovery.com/coaching Groups: https://www.joy-recovery.com/groups YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/@JoyRecovery

In this episode of Joy Recovery Radio, we explore the crucial role of empathy in healing relationships after sexual infidelity and betrayal trauma. Learn practical strategies and deep insights to enhance your empathic abilities. We discuss the definition of empathy, barriers to becoming empathic, and the five levels of empathy using the Carkhuff Empathy Scale. Discover how empathic communication can facilitate the healing process and rebuild trust between partners. Join us as we dive deep into understanding and improving empathy to support your partner's recovery journey. 00:00 The Importance of Empathy 01:48 Understanding Empathy 04:43 Barriers to Empathy 09:58 The Carkhuff Empathy Scale 25:37 Practical Steps to Improve Empathy 28:40 Benefits of Higher Empathy Levels    Free Assessment: Is the Recovery Real? 9 Vital Questions for Addicts & Partners - https://www.joy-recovery.com/real-recovery Free Newsletter: joy-recovery.com Coaching: https://www.joy-recovery.com/coaching Groups: https://www.joy-recovery.com/groups YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/@JoyRecovery

Breaking the Chains of Self-Deception: Healing After Infidelity | Joy Recovery Radio Welcome back to Joy Recovery Radio! In this episode, we dive deep into the role of self-deception in addiction, especially related to sexual infidelity and betrayal trauma. We explore how self-deception is foundational to addiction, the ways it manifests, and practical strategies to overcome it. Learn about the importance of self-awareness, feedback, and an intimate relationship with God. This episode aims to provide clarity, comfort, and new perspectives on your healing journey. Join us and discover a path toward genuine healing and hope. 00:00 Understanding the Heart and Self-Deception 02:49 Biblical Perspective on Self-Deception 04:37 Practical Examples of Self-Deception 07:07 Blame Shifting and Its Impact 10:56 Cycle of Abuse and Upcoming Webinar 12:05 Justification and Rationalization 13:26 Minimization and Denial 15:33 Shame and Sexuality 18:01 Breaking the Cycle of Self-Deception 18:20 Self-Awareness and Relationships 22:15 Reflective Questions and Conclusion   Free Assessment: Is the Recovery Real? 9 Vital Questions for Addicts & Partners - https://www.joy-recovery.com/real-recovery Free Newsletter: joy-recovery.com Coaching: https://www.joy-recovery.com/coaching Groups: https://www.joy-recovery.com/groups YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/@JoyRecovery

In this episode of Joy Recovery Radio, we discuss the critical issue of abusive behavior among sex addicts, through the lens of the Minwalla model and biblical teachings. We emphasize the importance of personal accountability and rejecting abusive behavior. Host Roy expands on how abusive behavior and addiction stem from the same root issue—a heart of pride—and explains how cultivating a heart of humility through daily practices and spiritual guidance can lead to transformational healing. Practical insights and personal experiences are shared to inspire and guide both addicts and their partners toward a lasting recovery. Visit Joy-Recovery.com for additional support and resources. 00:00 Understanding Abusive Behavior in Sex Addicts 02:06 Foundational Assumptions for Addressing Abuse 05:01 Common Misconceptions About Abuse 10:35 The Root Cause of Abuse: A Heart Problem 15:37 Transforming Pride into Humility 21:00 Jesus' Teachings on Power and Humility 25:46 Personal Testimony and Daily Practice   Free Assessment: Is the Recovery Real? 9 Vital Questions for Addicts & Partners - https://www.joy-recovery.com/real-recovery Free Newsletter: joy-recovery.com Coaching: https://www.joy-recovery.com/coaching Groups: https://www.joy-recovery.com/groups YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/@JoyRecovery

In today's episode, we explore an excerpt from our Conscious Contact group focusing on the spiritual side of recovery. Learn from expert teachings, including a four-phase process inspired by Dr. Robert Enright and the teachings of Jesus, to identify, process, and work through resentments. We delve into exploring resentments, committing to change, the work of forgiveness, and achieving freedom from emotional prisons. Join us for this insightful journey towards healing and forgiveness. Visit joy-recovery.com for more resources and support. 00:00 Welcome to Joy Recovery Radio 00:43 Introduction to Conscious Contact 01:24 Understanding and Identifying Resentments 01:52 Exploring the Roots of Resentments 03:41 Differences and Expectations in Relationships 05:53 Valid vs. Invalid Resentments 07:31 The Three I's of Shame and Projection 09:54 Primary and Secondary Wounds 11:29 Committing to Forgiveness 16:10 Rehumanizing the Perpetrator 21:00 Giving the Gift of Forgiveness 24:56 Stepping into Freedom 28:56 Final Thoughts and Encouragement   Free Assessment: Is the Recovery Real? 9 Vital Questions for Addicts & Partners - https://www.joy-recovery.com/real-recovery Free Newsletter: joy-recovery.com Coaching: https://www.joy-recovery.com/coaching Groups: https://www.joy-recovery.com/groups YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/@JoyRecovery

In this episode of Joy Recovery Radio, we delve into the intricate relationship between deception and sex addiction. Discover the science of what happens in the brain when we lie, the role of the prefrontal cortex, amygdala, and nucleus accumbens, and how chronic dishonesty can affect cognitive function and emotional regulation. Learn about the potential for neuroplasticity and actionable steps to rewire your brain for honesty and integrity. Join us for insights, strategies, and hope for couples navigating recovery from sexual infidelity and betrayal trauma. 00:00 Introduction to Deception and Sex Addiction 01:54 The Neurological Impact of Lying 02:45 Key Brain Players in Deception 06:50 The Role of Deception in Sex Addiction 09:01 The Downward Spiral of Chronic Lying 13:40 Hope Through Neuroplasticity 15:45 Steps to Rewire Your Brain for Honesty 21:35 Harnessing Dopamine for Positive Change 23:46 Final Message of Hope and Summary   Free Assessment: Is the Recovery Real? 9 Vital Questions for Addicts & Partners - https://www.joy-recovery.com/real-recovery Free Newsletter: joy-recovery.com Coaching: https://www.joy-recovery.com/coaching Groups: https://www.joy-recovery.com/groups YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/@JoyRecovery