As another year wraps up, you may find yourself reflecting on what you achieved, what you didn’t, and where you hope to go next. It’s a natural process, but it can easily stir up a voice we know all too well: The Inner Critic. This week’s episode on The Unlock Lab, I address the inner critic that measures your success harshly. I highlight the importance of setting your own measures based on what matters to you rather than what others expect, and how to understand and tame the inner critic through a compassionate and truthful self assessment. This is a reminder to celebrate your achievements and to see your inner critic for what it is - just one part of you trying to keep you protected and safe from disappointment.
Tune in to learn how to reclaim what success means to you, and end the year grounded in trust instead of self-judgment.
Episode Highlights:
Shift out of the inner critic negative loop
The inner critic rarely considers reality; the unexpected challenges, shifting priorities or global uncertainty that shaped your year.
Reflect on how you have lived this year; did you show up for yourself and others with integrity?
Quotables:
[00:07:54]
"Let's remember that inner critics tell you lies. Let's remember that this work of mastering and shifting our inner critic dialogue is to check for the actual truth. 'Cause your inner critic is feeding you lies, and we're not gonna have it. We're not gonna end our year in despair because our inner critic is running amuck."
[00:12:58]
"As you think about your measures of success, you can ask yourself; What types of things did you prioritize? And you may need to really sit with that for a minute because you are prioritizing and reprioritizing your life every single day. It's constant. And with all the things going on in the world, sometimes the prioritization was just maintaining our sanity and not falling into a deep hole of despair, and that is valid as a priority."
[00:19:12]
"I want you to consider what season have I been in? Was it a season of grief? Was it a season of personal growth and focus on self? Was it a season of giving yourself permission to just be and stop engaging in the hustle culture? Maybe it was a season of building your confidence and going slower and being more assured in your decisions."
Tosca’s Links and Resources:
Sign up for Tosca's Newsletter: http://toscadimatteo.com/newsletter
Tosca’s Website: https://www.toscadimatteo.com
Get in Touch with Tosca: https://www.toscadimatteo.com/contact
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/toscadimatteo/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/toscadimatteo/
Props for:
Theme music by Adrian DiMatteo https://adriandimatteo.com
Podcast editing by: Landis Podcast Editing https://www.landispodcastediting.com
Discernment is the ability to make the best possible choice for yourself - which is the recognition that you have the sovereignty to choose what is truly for you. It took me years to learn how I was giving away my time, energy and resources without being discerning enough. Being selective about which relationships and places you invest in will change the trajectory of your life, because you’ll be in more alignment with what you are worthy of.
Tune in to learn where you might be self abandoning or accepting less than you’re deserving, so that you can honor yourself, your desires and your standards at a new level. And why not start now when we are in the hustle and bustle of holiday time!?
Episode Highlights:
•Untangling yourself from the belief that your connections automatically get unlimited access
•Noticing when you’re saying yes from scarcity (fear of missing out, fear of being lonely, fear of closing a door)
•Learning to trust that when you say no to what’s not aligned so you create space for what will serve you in the long term
Quotables:
[00:04:57]
“Discernment has been a big word for me for several years because I had this big realization several years ago about who I was allowing in my life and who had the opportunity to have access to me and where I was giving my resources to. And I realized that there was a lot of folks that were getting my time and energy that really hadn't earned a spot there.”
[00:09:29]
“ I would stay on calls well past the point of value. I would stay on to be that support person and to give and to hold space. It was my way of giving and over time I realized I'm just giving away too damn much. It's not about not being generous and it's not about not giving, it's about being discerning about what level of that works for you.”
[00:20:17]
“ As you are moving through this season, as you are recognizing, oh my gosh, we're already several days into December, remember that you get to take your power back. You get to take your time and your energy back through discernment and it's not a selfish act because what is in your best interest is in the best interest of others as well."
Tosca’s Links and Resources:
Sign up for Tosca's Newsletter: http://toscadimatteo.com/newsletter
Tosca’s Website: https://www.toscadimatteo.com
Get in Touch with Tosca: https://www.toscadimatteo.com/contact
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/toscadimatteo/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/toscadimatteo/
Props for:
Theme music by Adrian DiMatteo https://adriandimatteo.com
Podcast editing by: Landis Podcast Editing https://www.landispodcastediting.com
Open wounds in relationships can throw off how we move in the world because it causes us dis-ease not only in our mind, but often in our body too. In this week’s episode, I dig into what it takes to move through relationship unrest when the other person can’t show up, won’t take responsibility, or simply isn’t able to meet you where you are.
It's a big and emotional topic, but finding healing and resolution within yourself holds so much power. Once you stop waiting for an apology or a resolution that may never come, you finally start reclaiming your peace.
I share personal stories about over-giving, ignoring red flags and staying in relationships long after receiving signs that you outgrew them. Tune in to hear how healing comes from taking responsibility for your own emotional process, practicing self-forgiveness, and accepting people exactly as they are, not as you wish they were.
Episode Highlights:
Heal without an apology, to take your power back.
Healing happens when you feel and release your emotions, not by waiting for time to pass.
Recognize your relationship patterns, and what you need to shift to attract what you need now in your life.
Quotables:
[00:06:45]
“ Time does not heal all wounds, what heals all wounds is you actively taking action for your healing. That's what works. Time will pass, but if you're not taking action on finding resolve within yourself around these relationships, it's not just gonna go away on its own.”
[00:10:17]
“ Healing our relationships is a process of self forgiveness. It's also a process of loving the other person through who they are right now, and what their limitations are right now, and this can even include family.”
[00:32:10]
“ One of the things I also wanna leave you with in your relationship healing journey is to ask yourself, do you miss the person or do you miss the idea of who you wish that person could be for you?”
Tosca’s Links and Resources:
Sign up for Tosca's Newsletter: http://toscadimatteo.com/newsletter
Tosca’s Website: https://www.toscadimatteo.com
Get in Touch with Tosca: https://www.toscadimatteo.com/contact
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/toscadimatteo/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/toscadimatteo/
Props for:
Theme music by Adrian DiMatteo https://adriandimatteo.com
Podcast editing by: Landis Podcast Editing https://www.landispodcastediting.com
“Think easy” is just one of the mantras and wisdom shared by Vino Nobile winemaker, Niccolò Tiberini. It serves as a reminder to clear the cloud around our choices so we can see what is true.
When I met Niccolò in Tuscany I knew before I left his winery that I had to have him on my podcast. I mean, the Tiberini the tagline is 'deep roots' - need I say more? His life and work are rooted (quite literally) in the vineyards of his seventh generation winery. We talked about his journey from aspiring professional footballer (aka soccer) to choosing a life that prioritizes happiness over money. Through stories about winemaking, travel and navigating change, Niccolò shares his philosophy on simplicity, identity, and creating a life that feels good, even if that means long work days.
Episode Highlights:
When things feel complicated - think like child
Focus on the solution not the problem
Your emotions are more powerful than your pro / con list
When you like what you do - you will do your work well
Focus on what’s working vs what’s not
A measure of success: did I do better today than yesterday?
When it comes to change, focus on the best way to leverage those changes
Don’t fall in the trap of overthinking; if you’re thinking about change, it’s because you want it
Your life is in your control
There are no wrong choices. The point is to make one.
Quotables:
[00:06:02] - Niccolò
"For me, it's not important to have a lot of money, but it is important to be satisfied about life and I decided to come back to work in the winery because this is my passion."
[00:38:31] - Niccolò
“If you’re not sure about something, you start looking for justification and when you do that, it’s because you don’t really want it.”
[01:00:27] - Tosca
"What are these connections we can make to this journey of life, of every milestone, of every decision point and coming back to remembering who we are and what our desires are, what our vision is, because that is the truest path. That's what I'm taking away."
Niccolò Tiberini Links
Website: https://tiberiniwine.com/en/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/tiberiniwinery/
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/tiberiniwinery/?locale=it_IT
Tosca’s Links and Resources:
Sign up for Tosca's Newsletter: http://toscadimatteo.com/newsletter
Tosca’s Website: https://www.toscadimatteo.com
Get in Touch with Tosca: https://www.toscadimatteo.com/contact
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/toscadimatteo/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/toscadimatteo/
Props for:
Theme music by Adrian DiMatteo https://adriandimatteo.com
Podcast editing by: Landis Podcast Editing https://www.landispodcastediting.com
Are you tired of being in your head all the time? Do you overthink and regularly focus on making plans for your next move, but never feel at ease in the moment?
In this week’s episode of The Unlock Lab, I dig into why we default to living from our headspace; old wounds and stress push us to doing what makes us feel in control. This protective habit can leave you feeling disconnected and fatigued. I talk about my journey from constantly overanalyzing to embracing a heart-centered, intuitive approach. I share the rituals I use to connect with my body that keep me grounded and present and out of my head.
As the holiday season approaches, I invite you to join me in making space for presence, honoring your emotions, and reaching out for support when you need it the most.
Episode Highlights:
Recognizing when you are operating from your headspace instead of heartspace, and why it matters
Simple daily rituals and practices to anchor back into your feelings, body and intuition
How to embrace support, presence and heart- centered action, especially during busy or challenging times
Quotables:
[00:06:21]
"It's okay to check in with how I'm feeling and it's okay to check in with my intuition. I realize what I have to do in these moments that I'm living from my head. I have to ask myself, am I doing what I wanna do or what I think I should do?"
[00:08:30]
"Passing the baton is honoring that your brain isn't actually meant to run the show, your body and heart space is. This actually is the way we're intended to live our lives from these spaces. We've just grown so accustomed to doing quite the opposite."
[00:13:40]
"If you're in that overthinking mode and overdoing mode, then my biggest counsel to you is to pass the baton from your head to your heart and to see what happens. Look for the evidence of the magic that happens when you make this shift."
Tosca’s Links and Resources:
Sign up for Tosca's Newsletter: http://toscadimatteo.com/newsletter
Tosca’s Website: https://www.toscadimatteo.com
Get in Touch with Tosca: https://www.toscadimatteo.com/contact
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/toscadimatteo/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/toscadimatteo/
Props for:
Theme music by Adrian DiMatteo https://adriandimatteo.com
Podcast editing by: Landis Podcast Editing https://www.landispodcastediting.com
Holding onto our confidence is critical to weather the storms that come - and oh do they come! In this week’s episode of The Unlock Lab, I explore what it takes to nurture confidence even when we can't seem to open the doors we are determined to open. Reflecting on my own ongoing journey navigating rejection and resilience, I share nine actionable tips, including reframes that have helped me stay grounded and optimistic. I talk about why confidence is not a fixed state but a continuous practice and how reframing rejection, leaning on community and creating your own opportunities can make all the difference. Tune in to find encouragement and actionable ideas to help you reclaim your power and keep moving forward.
Episode Highlights:
Reframing rejection as protection or redirection rather than a personal failure
Building internal confidence through self validation and not relying solely on external approval
How to create your own opportunities when traditional doors stay closed
Quotables:
[00:08:36]
"I want you to celebrate your bravery and your vulnerability for going after something that maybe wasn't gonna be a surefire win. That celebration, even in the face of rejection is so freaking powerful."
[00:16:03]
“The real work in staying confident through thick and thin is that you are first and foremost validating yourself and the external validation the external yeses just become the icing on the cake versus the whole damn cake.”
[00:21:17]
"We can't live in the future. We can't live in the past. We have to live in the present. So by honoring that, we can remember, we're okay and we are resilient and we can keep going just in this present moment."
Tosca’s Links and Resources:
Sign up for Tosca's Newsletter: http://toscadimatteo.com/newsletter
Tosca’s Website: https://www.toscadimatteo.com
Get in Touch with Tosca: https://www.toscadimatteo.com/contact
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/toscadimatteo/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/toscadimatteo/
Props for:
Theme music by Adrian DiMatteo https://adriandimatteo.com
Podcast editing by: Landis Podcast Editing https://www.landispodcastediting.com
In this week’s episode of The Unlock Lab I speak with Roderick Jefferson, a Keynote Speaker & Go To Market Transformation Leader, author and survivor.
Roderick opens up about his career journey, often being 'the only' in the room as a black man in tech and what he sacrificed along the way. He also shares his terrifying health event that shook every part of his life, forcing him to rethink what success really means and the impetus for his book "Stroke of Success".
His journey is not just about overcoming adversity, it’s about finding courage, faith and the deep joy in life’s most important relationships. If you've ever felt overwhelmed by the pressures of leadership or caught in the endless hustle, Roderick’s story will touch your heart and inspire you to choose what truly matters.
ABOUT RODERICK
Roderick Jefferson is an internationally recognized business and transformational speaker. He has shared his dynamic and energetic voice in a variety of events, including keynotes, guest lectures, webinars, podcasts, and domain expertise panels, with companies such as the ATD Conference, B2BMX Conference, Cisco, Collibra, LinkedIn, MindTickle, Revasum, Oracle, Sales Assembly Conference, Sales 3.0 Conference, Sales Enablement PRO Conference, Salesforce (Dreamforce), SAP, Seismic, Showpad, SiriusDecisions, Uber, and Zoom.
Roderick is also an acknowledged thought leader in the sales enablement space and the author of the Amazon bestselling book Sales Enablement 3.0: The Blueprint to Sales Enablement Excellence, and Sales 3.0 Companion Workbook.
He has held various executive leadership, sales, sales enablement, operations, and customer experience roles at AT&T, B Marketo, Oracle, Salesforce, and others.
When he's not speaking or working on enablement projects and programs, he can be found perfecting the art of barbecuing or playing bocce in my backyard with his family.
Episode Highlights:
Carrying the responsibility of being “the only one,” Roderick turned his challenges into a heartfelt mission to lift others up.
The courageous choice to take charge of his career in a way that felt authentic and aligned with his true self.
Incredible story of survival - being in the 2%
Quotables:
[00:27:26] - Roderick
"I got a new focus on life and I call it my four Fs. Faith, family, friends, and fun and you know what really sucks is the older we get, that last four fun seems to disappear from our lives because we're too busy living to enjoy being alive."
[00:29:11] - Roderick
"You only get one chance to live and I always think what I used to tell my son, life's not a video game. Once you turn it off, that's it, right but most people don't get a second chance. Find a way to live and find something that you do just for yourself to give yourself some grace, to give yourself an opportunity to close out all the noises of life."
[00:34:33] - Roderick
"I still believe that there are a ton of good people in this world, regardless of what the media would want you, I believe, to believe, and I wanna be one of those good people, not just to be a good guy, but because I firmly believe that empathy and being human will overcome all of the craziness that's going in today's world."
Roderick's Links and Resources:
Stroke of Success Book: https://www.roderickjefferson.com/stroke-of-success
Sales 3.0 Book Link: https://roderickjefferson.com/book
Keynote Speaker Highlight Reel: https://bit.ly/3zRVNJa
LinkedIn: https://linktr.ee/roderickjefferson
Podcast Playlist (Spotify): http://bit.ly/4mHhSOv
Tosca’s Links and Resources:
Props for:
How we tell the story of our career shapes how others see us, and plays a huge role in the possibilities for what's next. This episode is inspired by my Talent Development Magazine article “Level Up Your Brand Narrative,” and I dive into what it means to own and evolve your professional story.
I talk about how your personal brand isn’t something you set and forget, but rather an ongoing reflection of your growth. This is why refining your narrative ahead of year end review season can help you feel more confident, clear and ready for conversations about your future.
When you tune in, you'll hear the origin story of how this article came to life, a reminder that being open to unexpected outcomes can lead to opportunities you never imagined. I'll also help you make this process feel lighter by encouraging you to tap into a creative approach to reviewing your journey to date.
Episode Highlights:
Six tips for leveling up your brand and narrative
Why and how your year end review process can start right now
Staying open to unexpected opportunities and changing your mind along the way
Quotables:
[00:09:12]
"The first thing you have to do is make sure that you are asking yourself what needs healing from the past still? What else do I have to let go of? What else do I have to forgive?"
[00:13:41]
"If you're an entrepreneur or you have a side business, review yourself, celebrate yourself, honor where your opportunities are. Honor what you've accomplished and update your resume."
[00:18:01]
"With just about all my clients, we end up doing work around brand narrative because I know that they need a mirror and a reflector to help them see just how powerful they are. And to see the beauty in their journey and the threads and the themes of their journey that they can start talking about themselves in a different way."
Tosca’s Links and Resources:
Level Up Your Brand Narrative: https://www.toscadimatteo.com/_files/ugd/23d731_1fd2b0e81aee4559b95c21b675639bfe.pdf
Sign up for Tosca's Newsletter: http://toscadimatteo.com/newsletter
Tosca’s Website: https://www.toscadimatteo.com
Get in Touch with Tosca: https://www.toscadimatteo.com/contact
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/toscadimatteo/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/toscadimatteo/
Props for:
Theme music by Adrian DiMatteo https://adriandimatteo.com
Podcast editing by: Landis Podcast Editing https://www.landispodcastediting.com
Do you have a financial inner critic? That relentless, nagging voice that keeps you tangled in scarcity, fear and shame around money? In this episode of The Unlock Lab I talk about how you can change your entire relationship with this part of you. I share pieces of my own journey with deeply embedded financial thoughts, along with six practical ways to quiet this critic, reduce your stress, and make more empowered money decisions. This is the first step toward building a healthier and more abundant relationship with your finances.
Episode Highlights
Examples of the kinds of things this critic says
How the financial inner critic impacts your behaviors.
Six tips to reduce overwhelm and shift into clarity.
Why learning to face the truth of your finances creates freedom.
Quotables:
[00:00:00]
"The more that you can diffuse the high emotions related to finances and tap into the rational, calm, stable person that you are, the easier this is going to be for you."
[00:23:08]
"I'm not saying that the way that I am expressing how I see abundance is right or wrong, it's just how I've come to find more expansion in it, less harshness with myself in it. More freedom with it, and whatever that is for you, I wish that for you as well."
[00:38:29]
"There are so many resources out there, I'll just go back to like the first step is just to investigate what are the thoughts, the beliefs that you have about money right now? What are the ones that you've been telling yourself for a long time? And that will pave the pathway to understanding what you actually believe about resources and having enough, about being able to afford things."
Tosca’s Links and Resources:
Sign up for Tosca's Newsletter: http://toscadimatteo.com/newsletter
Tosca’s Website: https://www.toscadimatteo.com
Get in Touch with Tosca: https://www.toscadimatteo.com/contact
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/toscadimatteo/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/toscadimatteo/
Props for:
Theme music by Adrian DiMatteo https://adriandimatteo.com
Podcast editing by: Landis Podcast Editing https://www.landispodcastediting.com
If you quit your job, got laid off, fired, or if you have no clients in your pipeline, this episode is for YOU! Most of us were never taught how to be in limbo with grace and with ease. We’ve been conditioned to work nonstop, to fill every gap, and to treat career pauses like failures instead of the natural part of life they really are.
In this week’s episode, I invite you to see the seasons between jobs, clients or opportunities as a chance to stop rushing and finally breathe. I walk you through eight ways to navigate this space with more ease and hope, from honoring your emotions and celebrating endings, to releasing the pressure of figuring it all out right away. Pauses don’t come often, but when they do, they can open the door to something better than you imagined.
Episode Highlights:
8 tips for navigating the uncertainty of being in-between
Why pressing pause and normalizing career breaks are important
How to care for yourself and shift the story you tell about this season
Quotables:
[00:00:03]
"You are where you're meant to be, nothing is wasted, life is happening for you and not to you. So how can you release the pressure that you're putting on yourself?"
[00:08:24]
"When I say taking a true pause, I mean that you're not focused on what's next quite yet. That will come but this pause is so critical after something has just ended because there's a lot of work to be done in that pause. A lot of celebrating and a lot of just being."
[00:25:26]
"Part of this in between time is to really find out about your natural rhythm. Likely your natural rhythm has been put on the back burner or beaten out of you over the years or over the course of your life, because of how you were conditioned to be. And there will be times that you find your rhythm in this journey, and there will be times where you realize you need a different approach."
Tosca’s Links and Resources:
Sign up for Tosca's Newsletter: http://toscadimatteo.com/newsletter
Tosca’s Website: https://www.toscadimatteo.com
Get in Touch with Tosca: https://www.toscadimatteo.com/contact
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/toscadimatteo/
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/toscadimatteo/
Props for:
Theme music by Adrian DiMatteo https://adriandimatteo.com
Podcast editing by: Landis Podcast Editing https://www.landispodcastediting.com
In this episode of The Unlock Lab, I sit down with comedian and motivational speaker Pat Dwyer to talk about what it really means to lean into the unknown. Pat shares his journey from studying politics to performing with Second City, navigating workplaces and ultimately stepping into his role as a sought after speaker.
We talk about the power of team mentality, taking leaps of faith, facing challenges you never saw coming and why humor is such a powerful tool for resilience. Pat also opens up about his family’s choice to live in an RV during the pandemic and finding freedom in the unknown. This conversation is equal parts laughter, reflection and practical wisdom you can carry into your own life.
ABOUT PAT DWYER
For over two decades, Pat Dwyer has captivated and motivated audiences worldwide. Pulling from his background in Improv and Sketch Comedy with legendary institutions The Second City, iO Theater, and ComedySportz, among others, Pat has merged these talents in training and performance with the strategic mindset he cultivated during the early days working at notable Chicago startups like Groupon and Ignite. As you could guess, Pat's journey has since lent him an opportunity to help organizations all around the globe find their own unique blend of leadership and team enhancing effectiveness.
Now, as a sought-after speaker at conferences, events, and association meetings, Pat brings his energetic, hilarious and wildly engaging approach to both personal and organizational resilience. He’s definitely a speaker you don’t want to miss as Pat Dwyer is easily your most engaging route to people-driven Innovation and change.
Episode Highlights:
Why a team mentality makes the impossible feel possible
How humor can transform challenges into resilience
Lessons from living on the road during the pandemic
The TILT approach to smoothing out the journey of life
Pay attention to your own LEGO's
Quotables:
[00:08:13] - Tosca
"I think we're in a time where we're jumping back into our goals and we often need other people in that pursuit and so we just can't forget that we can't do it alone and that it's okay to ask and it's also okay to get a no, or be ghosted or get rejected, because that's part of the process too."
[00:45:17] - Pat
"Everybody has their own experiences, their own pile of Legos that they're all playing in to try to figure out what they're building in that moment. Friends like that for me is in realizing that if everybody has their own Legos, they're not actually concerned with my Legos."
[01:06:52]
"We don't known where it's going ever, and no one of us knows where it is going. We can try to pretend that we can control that. There's data coming that we have no clue is on the table yet, and that is fine. It is more a matter of how we react to it and how we use it and bank it and keep it in our minds so that we can use it to our advantage later."
Pat's Links:
LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/pat-dwyer/
Facebook, Instagram, Youtube - @IKnowPatDwyer
Website: https://www.patdwyerwastaken.com/
Tosca’s Links and Resources:
Sign up for Tosca's Newsletter: http://toscadimatteo.com/newsletter
Giving Flowers To:
Theme music by: Adrian DiMatteo
Podcast edited by: Landis Podcast Editing
This week on The Unlock Lab, I talk about how to address and manage our triggers, which is very much tied to working our emotional intelligence muscles. Triggers can feel overwhelming whether they happen in personal relationships or in the workplace, but they don’t have to derail you. In this episode, I talk about how I have responded to triggers in a way I'm not proud of, and how I learned to come back to compassion, truth and self-respect. I explain why triggers are actually gifts, how to use them as guides for healing, and share actions that you can take to help you recover faster, and experience them less often over time.
Episode Highlights:
Practical ways to pause, create space and respond with intention.
Reframing triggers as opportunities for healing, growth and better leadership
Why compassion and ownership reduce the impact of future triggers.
Quotables:
[00:00:33]
"Improve your emotional intelligence. It's really important to do this work, not just for the personal relationships in your life, but your professional relationships."
[00:09:47]
"I wrote about this triggering experience and it took me about a day to move through the emotions. I had to let myself feel what was coming up and what was coming up were emotions, not from actually the present moment, but they were coming up from the past."
[00:26:41]
"There are certain emotions that we are afraid of having. Anger is one of them and I believe all emotions serve us. They're our greatest teacher and they show us where the work is."
Tosca’s Links and Resources:
Related blog post: The Real Power Move as a Leader Isn't What You think
Sign up for Tosca's Newsletter: http://toscadimatteo.com/newsletter
Giving Flowers To:
Theme music by: Adrian DiMatteo
Podcast edited by: Landis Podcast Editing
In Part 2 of my two part series with Anton Gunn, we move deeper into the journey, from discouragement and struggle to leading at the highest levels of government. This isn’t a story about chasing titles, it’s about what it takes to lead with conviction when the path is unclear. Anton shares how hip hop music helped him survive his darkest moments, how a single mentor changed the trajectory of his life, and how staying rooted in service carried him all the way to advising a president. This episode is about grit, guidance, and the kind of servant leadership we need more of.
Anton's Bio
Anton Gunn has a Masters Degree in Social Work from University of South Carolina and was a resident Fellow at Harvard. He is the bestselling author of 'The Presidential Principles' and has been featured in TIME Magazine, Forbes, BBC, NPR and on Good Morning America. Recently, Anton was named by Fierce Healthcare as one of the Most Influential Minority Executives in Healthcare.
As an international speaker and consultant, he has worked with organizations like Mercedes Benz, T-Mobile, Entrepreneurs' Organization Sodexo, KPMG, Verizon Wireless, Aetna, Blue Shield of California, American College of Surgeons, FINRA, and the Boeing Company.
From playing SEC Football and being the first African American in history elected to the SC legislature from his district early in his career, to now serving on multiple boards, he has spent his life helping people build diverse high performing teams and world class leadership culture.
Episode Highlights:
How hip hop became the soundtrack of Anton's life, and a survival tool.
The story of how one leader, not only saw his potential but equipped him to lead, and how that shaped everything that followed.
How Anton followed his passion for fighting injustice led him from community organizing, to an elected office, to the White House and building his own consultancy.
Quotables:
[00:02:25]
"All of our lives are movies and we go to different scenes. We go to different segments of our life that are different scenes in a movie, different parts of the story. And every great movie has a soundtrack."
[00:12:22]
"People talk about knowledge is power. Lenora gave me a lot of knowledge, but what she gave me more than just knowledge is she taught me how to apply that knowledge, because applied knowledge is actually power."
[00:34:16]
"You may not be able to solve everything, but there is something that you can do to make it right. That's what I've been teaching to leaders from stages, is that it may be wrong in your culture. It may be wrong in your company. It may be wrong on your team. There may be things that are out of your control, but there is something that you can do to make it right."
Anton's Links and Resources:
The Presidential Principles Book
This episode is generously sponsored by: Human Design by Holly
Use Code: UNLOCKLAB to get 25% off when booking your first reading
Tosca’s Links and Resources:
Sign up for Tosca's Newsletter: http://toscadimatteo.com/newsletter
Giving Flowers To:
Theme music by: Adrian DiMatteo
Podcast edited by: Landis Podcast Editing
Get ready for the leadership conversation you didn't know you needed. In this special 2-part series, you will meet Anton Gunn, former senior advisor to President Barack Obama, and one of the world's leading authorities on socially conscious leadership.
Part 1 dives into Anton's raw and unfiltered story, from college football disappointments and careers dead ends to moments of powerlessness that nearly broke him. What unfolds is a masterclass in perseverance, humility and the mentor that changed Anton's life for years to come.
We talk about service, career pivots and the beautiful way life reroutes us to our calling, if we're paying attention. Anton generously shares moments of darkness behind incredible success and impact, with a determination to defeat all the odds.
Anton Gunn has a Masters Degree in Social Work from University of South Carolina and was a resident Fellow at Harvard. He is the bestselling author of 'The Presidential Principles' and has been featured in TIME Magazine, Forbes, BBC, NPR and on Good Morning America. Recently, Anton was named by Fierce Healthcare as one of the Most Influential Minority Executives in Healthcare.
As an international speaker and consultant, he has worked with organizations like Mercedes Benz, T-Mobile, Entrepreneurs' Organization Sodexo, KPMG, Verizon Wireless, Aetna, Blue Shield of California, American College of Surgeons, FINRA, and the Boeing Company.
From playing SEC Football and being the first African American in history elected to the SC legislature from his district early in his career, to now serving on multiple boards, he has spent his life helping people build diverse high performing teams and world class leadership culture.
Episode Highlights:
A college football dream became a catalyst for leadership and inner strength.
The power of mentorship, generosity and not blocking your blessings.
Finding purpose in pain and learning how to lead from a place of power.
Quotables:
[00:07:09] - Anton
"One of the cornerstones of my philosophy in life is to be useful to the people around you, because we can't control everything."
[00:15:46] - Anton
"I lost focus on the goals that I wanted, the things that I wanted. I was in what I call a hostile environment, that I threw what I wanted to do out of the window, and my only point was to survive. To me, surviving was, how do I get a college degree as fast as possible to get away from these coaches and to get away from this school?"
[00:42:28] - Anton
"Change happens when the pain of staying the same is greater than the pain that it takes to change."
Anton's Links and Resources:
The Presidential Principles Book
Tosca’s Links and Resources:
Sign up for Tosca's Newsletter: http://toscadimatteo.com/newsletter
Giving Flowers To:
Theme music by: Adrian DiMatteo
Podcast edited by: Landis Podcast Editing
In this week’s episode of The Unlock Lab, I talk to Benjamin Wolff, for a powerful conversation about the value of artistic and creative skills in the workplace. Ben is a Forbes leadership contributor, author, and former professional cellist. In our conversation he shares his personal journey from the concert stage, to corporate talent solutions, and we talk about why human skills like storytelling, emotional intelligence, and deep focus matter more than ever in the age of AI. We talk about what it really means to bring creativity into business, not just as performative one-hit-wonders, but as a core strategy for growth and innovation. This one is for anyone who’s ready to see talent differently.
Benjamin Wolff has been a Forbes Leadership contributor since 2017, writing about what corporate workplaces can learn from the arts. With his background as a professional cellist he brings a unique perspective to the conversation around business finding value in untapped pools of talent. He has delivered innovative programs on creativity, teamwork, and emotional intelligence for companies and organizations such as Cisco, Ingram Micro, the Association for Manufacturing Excellence, the Icahn School of Medicine at Mount Sinai, and Rockefeller University.
Episode Highlights:
How artists bring essential human skills, like focus, storytelling, and emotional intelligence into the workplace.
Why now is the moment for organizations to rethink hiring practices and embrace creative talent in the age of AI.
Practical ways leaders can start integrating creativity into their teams, including “translator” roles and creative personal practices.
Quotables:
[00:03:44]
"A lot of people, they appreciate the arts. They enjoy the arts, but what they get is the product. They go to the theatre and they see a play, or they see a movie, or they hear a concert, or they see a ballet. But most people, unless they're connected professionally in some way, never see what goes into it."
[00:14:47]
"Immeasurable is different from unmeasurable in that, it's something that not only can't you measure, but that shouldn't be measured."
[00:22:32]
"Core skills are the things that it's very hard to teach. You can learn about the specifics of a job, but those other skills you take with you from experience to experience, from job to job, they become part of your core. It is critical for Corporations to think about who they hire."
Ben's Links:
Book: The Value of Immeasurable Things
Tosca’s Links and Resources:
Sign up for Tosca's Newsletter: http://toscadimatteo.com/newsletter
Giving Flowers To:
Theme music by: Cello music by Benjamin Wolff
Podcast edited by: Landis Podcast Editing
In this week's episode of The Unlock Lab, I speak with former state police officer turned inspirational speaker, David Atkins. David shares his winding career story and opens up about the exact moment he made one bold, pressing decision that changed everything. From working through financial struggles with his wife, to becoming a successful businessman and speaker, David shows how vision, faith and courage fuel transformation. We dive into practical steps, and what it takes to rewrite your story starting TODAY. This conversation packs a powerful punch for how to get unstuck through David's "One Decision Away" philosophy. Whether you're feeling down and out, or would love an infusion of energy to continue to propel you forward, this episode is for you!
David Atkins is a retired New York State Police Captain after 22 years of service. While working full time with the NY State Police, David also built a million dollar international direct sales business with Beachbody, leading a team of 1,400 people today. He became a Keynote Motivational Speaker presenting to groups of a few hundred people to over 20,000 people in the NFL Super Dome in New Orleans. David published his first book "The Leveled Up Life", is the creator of "The One Decision Away Philosophy" and host of the Personal Perseverance Project Podcast.
Episode Highlights:
The moment David sat down with his wife and made the one decision that changed everything.
How fear, faith and daily discipline fuel real transformation.
Why you're never too far gone, and why your next breakthrough could be one choice away.
Quotables:
[00:25:34] - David
"If you're willing to make that one decision today don't worry about three weeks, three months, three years from now. Life will reveal to you what comes next if you're willing to make that one pressing decision in your life today."
[00:45:12] - David
"What you have is plenty because it's so easy to get caught up with the outside noise on social media and the news and the negativity and all of that stuff. But I'm a big believer like what you have in front of you is plenty, and you know what you need to do."
[00:49:26] - David
"You have to take care of yourself first, and then you're the best version of yourself for those people that you care about the most."
David Atkins Links:
Website (note: buy the book here from 7.15-7.20, 2025 and receive 3 bonuses)
This episode is generously sponsored by: Human Design by Holly
Use Code: UNLOCKLAB to get 25% off when booking your first reading
Tosca’s Links and Resources:
Sign up for Tosca's Newsletter: http://toscadimatteo.com/newsletter
Giving Flowers To:
Theme music by: Adrian DiMatteo
Podcast edited by: Landis Podcast Editing
In this week's episode, I talk about how to make decisions with more confidence by leaning into self trust, patience and self compassion. I share practical ways to reduce the stress and overwhelm that often come with decision making, like slowing down the urgency, getting intentional with small choices and remove the distraction of figuring out the "how" before you've even landed on '"what" the decisions even is. I also dive into the importance of listening to your body, taking mental space, and relieving the pressure valve of having to make a perfect decisions. These principles can help you make more grounded, empowered choices in your personal and professional life.
Episode Highlights:
How questioning the urgency of a decision can give you instant clarity.
Small choices that build long term trust in yourself.
Why the "how" can wait, and what to focus on instead.
Quotables:
[00:08:53]
I would say most of the time when we're struggling with a decision the pathway to doing that is not about asking other people about it, it's about going inward for yourself. We can be looking for all the answers in this period of overwhelm, when actually the best thing that we can do is to actually stop trying to figure it out."
[00:11:34]
"I was going with the flow I was making the smaller choices about the things that worked for me and what didn't work for me as it related to this relationship. Eventually what ended up happening was my body told me very clearly, this person isn't for you."
[00:20:20]
"I think we put a lot of pressure on ourselves that once we make a decision is final and it is it, and that is not true, we can change our mind. We can make a different decision."
This episode is generously sponsored by: Human Design by Holly
Use Code: UNLOCKLAB to get 25% off when booking your first reading
Tosca’s Links and Resources:
Sign up for Tosca's Newsletter: http://toscadimatteo.com/newsletter
Giving Flowers To:
Theme music by: Adrian DiMatteo
Podcast edited by: Landis Podcast Editing
In this week's episode of The Unlock Lab, I'm joined by Ruth Rathblott for a powerful and personal conversation about the cost of hiding who we are. Ruth opens up about concealing her limb difference for over 25 years, and what changed when she finally decided to show up fully. From navigating corporate spaces to embracing her identity as a speaker and author, Ruth walks us through her journey and shares her four-step framework to unhide. We dig into the emotional toll of hiding, how it holds us back in our relationships and careers, and what becomes possible when we step into authenticity and invite others to do the same.
Ruth Rathblott, MSW, is an expert on workplace culture and leadership, a TEDx and global keynote speaker, a 2x bestselling author, and an award-winning former nonprofit leader. Born with a limb difference, Ruth speaks on the power of embracing uniqueness, unlocking untapped potential and peak performance, and how the transformative act of unhiding leads to greater freedom and connection.
Episode Highlights:
Ruth shares her four step process to unhiding
The real life consequences of hiding at work and in life and how it can lead to exhaustion, disconnection and missed opportunities
Why leaders have to go first to create cultures where people feel safe to show up as themselves
Quotables:
[00:13:35] - Ruth
"I literally hid my hand for 25 years. Every outfit I had, always had pockets, longer sleeves, even in summer, just so that I could hide it. I hid it behind bags. I hid it from pictures, I was hiding it all the time. And when we talk about the cost of it, it was exhausting, lonely, and it was something I thought about all the time, it took over my life."
[00:20:15] - Ruth
"The true gift of connection, is when we can share our differences so that we don't have to keep a facade. We don't have to be perfect, because in our gifts, in that uniqueness, is perfection."
[00:29:19] -Ruth
"Could you be living your best life? Are you living your best life? How do we, how do you do that? And part of that is the unlocking of what's holding you back. One of the pieces that may be holding you back is the thing that you're hiding."
Ruth's Links and Resources:
TEDx: When I Stopped Hiding, I Found Freedom
Ruth's Books:
Singlehandedly. Learning to Unhide and Embrace Connection.
Unhide & Seek. Live Your Best Life. Do Your Best Work.
Tosca’s Links and Resources:
Sign up for Tosca's Newsletter: http://toscadimatteo.com/newsletter
Giving Flowers To:
Theme music by: Adrian DiMatteo
Podcast edited by: Landis Podcast Editing
In this special episode, I share my personal love story, celebrating 15 years of marriage. I take you behind the scenes of our relationship; the highs and the hard lessons and how this journey has helped me grow as a person, partner, and as a leader. I unpack eight key takeaways that apply just as much to leadership as they do to love. This episode is a reflection and an invitation to look at how your closest relationships can spark transformation in every area of life, if you tend to the soil they are rooted in.
Episode Highlights:
The power of trusting your body and intuition in decision making.
How freedom and commitment can coexist in healthy relationships
Eight lessons learned that translate into personal and professional growth.
Quotables:
[00:07:03]
"At the end of the day, I think that our ability to come back and communicate and be honest with each other has been what's allowed us to last as long as we have."
[00:10:57]
"What I want you to take away from this is that you deserve to be loved fully for who you are; flaws included, make up excluded. Feel safe with the one you love."
[00:19:25]
"No matter your commitment, your commitment to somebody else or something else, or an organization, know that you are always free. You are always free in your heart. And let that lead you and let you never forget that."
Tosca’s Links and Resources:
Sign up for Tosca's Newsletter: http://toscadimatteo.com/newsletter
Giving Flowers To:
Theme music by: Adrian DiMatteo
Podcast edited by: Landis Podcast Editing
In this week's episode, I talk about something that you are probably doing without knowing it. You may be blocking your own blessings. I share my journey of learning to receive, and releasing the habits that kept me from fully embracing life's abundances. I offer practical advice on how to become more aware of these habits and start embracing the generous offers and support from others. If you've ever felt like you're giving too much, saying no too often or shielding yourself from vulnerability, this one's for you. When we open the door to receive it is a huge pathway to professional breakthroughs as well - because it helps us to remain open to opportunities and connection.
Episode Highlights:
The most common ways we block blessings and how to stop them
The emotional roots of self sabotage, like unworthiness and perfectionism
Daily practices to become more open to receiving and living in alignment with abundance
Quotables:
[00:05:37]
"If you are overgiving, you are leaving no space for people to contribute. That means you are blocking your blessings, and you may never know what could have been possible because you are not leaving that space."
[00:18:02]
"When you look deeply at our habits of blocking our blessings, it's putting up walls. Perhaps feeling not worthy of what's being presented to us."
[00:24:28]
"Maybe what the other person needs is an opportunity to be generous, an opportunity to express gratitude. Perhaps the other person is in the process of their growth of being. So when you allow that exchange, it's a gift not just to yourself, but it's a gift to the other person too."
This episode is sponsored by: Tosca Coaching and Consulting
Tosca’s Links and Resources:
Sign up for Tosca's Newsletter: http://toscadimatteo.com/newsletter
Giving Flowers To:
Theme music by: Adrian DiMatteo
Podcast edited by: Landis Podcast Editing