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Quietly Autistic at Last
Dr. Allison Sucamele
19 episodes
20 hours ago
Send us a text What if the problem was never your brain but the environment asking it to pretend? In this episode of Quietly Autistic at Last, we explore why many neurodivergent people thrive in spaces that question tradition rather than worship it. This isn’t about being rebellious or “difficult.” It’s about cognitive integrity, nervous system safety, and a deep need for meaning, ethics, and logic. We unpack how unexamined rules in schools, workplaces, families, and even mental-health spaces...
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Mental Health
Health & Fitness
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Send us a text What if the problem was never your brain but the environment asking it to pretend? In this episode of Quietly Autistic at Last, we explore why many neurodivergent people thrive in spaces that question tradition rather than worship it. This isn’t about being rebellious or “difficult.” It’s about cognitive integrity, nervous system safety, and a deep need for meaning, ethics, and logic. We unpack how unexamined rules in schools, workplaces, families, and even mental-health spaces...
Show more...
Mental Health
Health & Fitness
Episodes (19/19)
Quietly Autistic at Last
# 18 - Why Neurodivergent People Thrive in Environments That Question Tradition
Send us a text What if the problem was never your brain but the environment asking it to pretend? In this episode of Quietly Autistic at Last, we explore why many neurodivergent people thrive in spaces that question tradition rather than worship it. This isn’t about being rebellious or “difficult.” It’s about cognitive integrity, nervous system safety, and a deep need for meaning, ethics, and logic. We unpack how unexamined rules in schools, workplaces, families, and even mental-health spaces...
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23 hours ago
12 minutes

Quietly Autistic at Last
# 17 - Why “High-Functioning” Misses the Point - Especially for Late-Diagnosed Women
Send us a text “You’re so high-functioning.” It’s a phrase many late-diagnosed autistic women hear when they finally share their diagnosis - often offered as reassurance, praise, or disbelief. And almost always, it misses the point. In this episode of Quietly Autistic at Last, we unpack why the term high-functioning doesn’t just fall short, it actively obscures the lived reality of autistic women diagnosed later in life. We explore the psychology beneath the label, including masking, nervous ...
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1 week ago
12 minutes

Quietly Autistic at Last
# 16 - Your Spoons Are Telling the Truth
Send us a text Spoon Theory is often explained as a simple metaphor for limited energy, but for autistic adults, especially late-identified autistic women, it’s far more than that. In this episode of Quietly Autistic at Last, we slow Spoon Theory down and return it to the body. We explore how spoons actually live in autistic nervous systems through sensory processing, masking, emotional regulation, burnout, predictability, and self-trust. Through an autistic lens, we talk about why exhaustion...
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2 weeks ago
18 minutes

Quietly Autistic at Last
# 15 - Why the Holidays Can Exacerbate Autistic Traits in Women
Send us a text Why do the holidays -this supposedly magical, sparkling, joy-filled season - feel so overwhelming, so intense, and so deeply dysregulating? And why do autistic traits seem to get louder, sharper, and more noticeable than ever? If you’ve ever wondered why the holidays don’t feel like the commercials… If you dread the calendar flipping to November… and then December… If you feel like you need a month-long sensory sabbatical once January arrives… You’re not broken. You’re not dram...
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3 weeks ago
16 minutes

Quietly Autistic at Last
# 14 - Why Travel Feels So Hard for Autistic Women: Anxiety, Separation, & the Nervous System
Send us a text Today’s episode explores something many late-diagnosed autistic women carry quietly and often alone: the intense stress, dread, and nervous-system-level anxiety that comes with travel, and the fear that rises even when someone else is traveling. Not just “I don’t love airports” discomfort, but the full-body tension that starts weeks before a trip… or the spiraling panic when a partner, child, or loved one gets on a plane and suddenly feels too far away. If travel has ever left ...
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4 weeks ago
24 minutes

Quietly Autistic at Last
# 13 - Being Organized Doesn’t Mean It’s Not Hard to Stay Organized
Send us a text Being organized doesn’t mean it’s easy to stay organized—and no, that’s not a moral failing. For many autistic women, it’s a neurological reality. In this deeply validating episode of Quietly Autistic at Last, we explore what it really means to live in a world that praises “looking put together” while overlooking the invisible labor it takes to maintain that appearance. From executive functioning differences to working memory overload, autistic burnout, masking, and the emotion...
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1 month ago
19 minutes

Quietly Autistic at Last
# 12 - Asking for Accommodations vs. Making Excuses: Reclaiming Your Needs Without Apology
Send us a text Today’s episode explores a topic many of you have been asking for: the difference between asking for accommodations and “making excuses,” why these requests feel so vulnerable for autistic women, and how to finally release the fear of being misunderstood. We talk about the early conditioning that taught so many of us to mask, overachieve, and never “need too much,” and why accommodations can feel like failure even when they’re essential. You’ll also hear how psychology, nervous...
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1 month ago
12 minutes

Quietly Autistic at Last
# 11 - Autumn Clarity: Letting Old Versions Fall Away
Send us a text This episode is a quiet meditation on change — the kind that doesn’t always feel exciting or triumphant, but necessary. We’ll explore how autistic and sensitive nervous systems experience emotional and seasonal transitions, the neuroscience behind letting go, and the psychology of identity shifts. Drawing from thinkers like Robert Kegan, Brené Brown, Lisa Feldman Barrett, and Stephen Porges, we’ll look at why release often feels like grief before it feels like freedom — and how...
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1 month ago
13 minutes

Quietly Autistic at Last
# 10 - Sensory Sanctuary: Designing a Life That Soothes Your System
Send us a text This episode isn’t about self-care as an abstract concept — it’s about survival, mental-health preservation, and learning how to exist in your body without constantly falling apart from sensory overload. In “Sensory Sanctuary,” we explore what it truly means to build a sensory-safe life, not just a cozy corner. You’ll learn how sensory stress shows up, how it connects to autistic burnout, and how the nervous system decides what feels safe or threatening. Together, we’ll unpack ...
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1 month ago
36 minutes

Quietly Autistic at Last
# 9 - Autistic Halloween: Sensory, Social, & Soul-Level Realities
Send us a text For many, Halloween is a night of fun, costumes, and candy. But for late-diagnosed autistic women, it can be something much deeper, and more overwhelming. In this episode, Dr. Allison Sucamele explores why a sensory-heavy, socially-charged holiday can feel so different when your nervous system has spent a lifetime masking and is finally learning to honor itself. We’ll talk about: ✨ The sensory storms of costumes, lights, and noise 🕯️ Reclaiming traditions in a way that fe...
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2 months ago
20 minutes

Quietly Autistic at Last
# 8 - The Double Voice Within: Navigating the Autistic Inner Monologue
Send us a text “I am speaking on the outside. But I am also narrating, analyzing, and negotiating on the inside. Two tracks. One body. One mind.” Welcome to Quietly Autistic at Last, the space where we stop performing, start understanding, and learn to live by the rhythm of our own nervous systems. I’m your host, Dr. Allison Sucamele. In this episode, we’re diving into something rarely named but deeply lived by many autistic women: the double interior monologue — the layered, structured, and ...
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2 months ago
20 minutes

Quietly Autistic at Last
# 7 - When “Rest” Isn’t Recovery
Send us a text Today we’re diving into something many late-identified autistic women know in our bones: when we don’t get real downtime — the kind with true quiet, low demands, and zero masking — our systems don’t just get tired, they get depleted. And here’s the twist: a good night’s sleep or a “catch-up” weekend often doesn’t fix it. In this episode, Dr. Allison Sucamele unpacks why that happens through the lens of autistic burnout, camouflaging, sensory load, monotropism, minority stress, ...
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2 months ago
20 minutes

Quietly Autistic at Last
# 6 - Autistic Fatigue — The Weight of Constant Adaptation
Send us a text Welcome to Quietly Autistic at Last, the space where we stop performing, start understanding, and learn to live by the rhythm of our own nervous systems. I’m your host, Dr. Allison Sucamele. In this episode, we explore a kind of exhaustion many autistic people know too well—a tired that sleep doesn’t fix. Autistic fatigue isn’t about laziness or ordinary burnout; it’s the deep depletion that comes from years of masking, decoding social cues, managing sensory overload, and adapt...
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2 months ago
15 minutes

Quietly Autistic at Last
# 5 - When You Finally Understand Yourself… and Others Still Don’t
Send us a text In this episode of Quietly Autistic at Last, we explore the quiet power of self-understanding after a late-in-life autism diagnosis. While diagnosis can feel like a homecoming, it doesn’t guarantee that others will suddenly understand—or even try to. Together, we’ll look at the gap between self-recognition and social recognition, the grief and liberation that can coexist, and the strategies for staying grounded in your truth even when others can’t see it. This conversation offe...
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3 months ago
14 minutes

Quietly Autistic at Last
# 4 - The Split of Late-in-Life Diagnosis: Freedom & Grief
Send us a text In this episode, The Split of Late-in-Life Diagnosis: Freedom & Grief, we explore the paradox many autistic women face when discovering their diagnosis later in life. For some, it feels like a light switching on—clarity, self-compassion, and the freedom to live authentically. For others, or often at the same time, it awakens grief for the misunderstood childhoods, lost opportunities, and silent struggles carried for years. Join me as I share my own reflections alongside ins...
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3 months ago
7 minutes

Quietly Autistic at Last
#3 - The Mask We Wear: Survival, Burnout, & Returning to Our Authentic Selves
Send us a text Welcome to Quietly Autistic at Last, hosted by Dr. Allison Sucamele—psychology researcher, educator, and late-diagnosed autistic woman. In this episode, we dive into one of the most common yet misunderstood aspects of the autistic experience: masking. From forcing eye contact to faking small talk, masking can look like survival on the surface—but beneath it lies exhaustion, anxiety, and burnout. We’ll explore what masking is, how it shows up in real life, the emotional toll it ...
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3 months ago
10 minutes

Quietly Autistic at Last
# 2 - Once Upon a Question: My Quiet Journey to “At Last”
Send us a text One student’s simple question changed the course of my life. In this episode of Quietly Autistic at Last, I share the story of how a moment in my classroom planted the seed that led me toward an autism diagnosis at 48. Part personal memoir, part behind-the-scenes reflection, this is a story of curiosity, courage, and the power of naming what was always there. Whether you’re late-diagnosed, exploring the possibility, or supporting someone on their journey, I hope my experience r...
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3 months ago
15 minutes

Quietly Autistic at Last
# 1 - You Were Never Wrong About Yourself - The Diagnosis
Send us a text Welcome to Quietly Autistic at Last, a podcast for women diagnosed with autism later in life—women who spent years, even decades, masked, misunderstood, or misdiagnosed. I'm your host, Dr. Allison Sucamele. In this debut episode, I share my own story—how a single question from one of my students led me to the RAADS-R (Ritvo Autism Asperger Diagnostic Scale–Revised) and, eventually, to an official autism diagnosis at 48 years old. We’ll explore what the RAADS-R is, its str...
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3 months ago
10 minutes

Quietly Autistic at Last
2025 Trailer - Quietly Autistic at Last
Send us a text Have you always felt... a little different? Like you were missing a piece that everyone else seemed to have? You masked. You overthought. You adapted. And still, you wondered—why is this so hard for me? I’m Dr. Allison Sucamele - psychology researcher, educator, and a woman diagnosed with autism later in life. And I’m here to tell you: You were never broken. You were never wrong about yourself. You were just… quietly autistic all along. Quietly Autistic at Last is a podcast for...
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4 months ago
1 minute

Quietly Autistic at Last
Send us a text What if the problem was never your brain but the environment asking it to pretend? In this episode of Quietly Autistic at Last, we explore why many neurodivergent people thrive in spaces that question tradition rather than worship it. This isn’t about being rebellious or “difficult.” It’s about cognitive integrity, nervous system safety, and a deep need for meaning, ethics, and logic. We unpack how unexamined rules in schools, workplaces, families, and even mental-health spaces...