Are you a high achiever who is a problem-solver & quick to give advice? At times does your wise counsel fall on deaf ears or cause others to turn away? If so, this episode can help you develop the art of advice-giving.
Learn to identify your intention in each conversation or interaction. Is your aim to win, fix, understand or love? Is this an opportunity to help via giving advice to solve a problem? Or would the best support come by asking nonjudgmental, probing questions & listening to truly understand? Or might this be a situation that warrants neither giving commands nor having curiosity, but rather calls for quiet caring -- not the doing for, but the being with?
Hear simple questions that you can ask to be able to determine whether the time is right to give advice. Learn practical approaches for how you can offer solutions in ways that empower others to tap into their own wisdom.
Start to feel the impact & satisfaction of practicing the art of advice-giving. Enjoy the rewards of helping others in a dignified way -- without over-extending yourself or over-stepping your bounds.
Are you a relationship builder or a relationship leverager? If you want to achieve next-level success, you need to be both. You have a treasure chest of valuable professional relationships. Now it is time to convert some of those gems into active currency.
Understand the difference between building relationships & leveraging them. Learn to identify those individuals who are both able to help & willing to help. Become the type of person who others can leverage. Be the colleague who asks, "How can I help?"
Find the perspective that will allow you to examine & overcome the old mindsets that are getting in the way of your being the type of person who is at ease with leveraging relationships. Learn practical steps that you can start taking now. Become comfortable expanding your focus beyond great relationship building & develop a career-long practice of leveraging your relationships to be even more valuable.
Success requires a wishbone, a backbone & a funny bone. To achieve what will truly satisfy us, we need to have a clear intention as to what we are seeking, give that desire our strong attention & then let go of the tension as to how it comes to us.
Identify which " bone" you are missing & learn how to build its capacity. Whether you want a career that you are passionate about, relationships that are caring & fulfilling or the enjoyment of your weekends, this episode is for you.
Do you have a job, a career or a life? If you want to feel satisfied, it is imperative that your focus be aligned with your values & goals.
Understand the important differences between having a job & having a career --- & the distinction between having a career & having a life. Identify what you can do to break out of a job & position yourself to advance in a career. Learn to access whether your primary aim is your career or your life -- & gain insights to be able to determine whether the time is right to divide your focus.
A fulfilling life needs to be full. Build an array of wealth that is not only financial but also physical, spiritual, relational, emotional & more. Take the first step towards a life that is rich in time (not always "crazy busy") & allows you to feel good.
Has the negative Voice in your head stopped being useful & productive? Is your Inner Critic -- that Gremlin in your thoughts that commands you to keep quiet, drives you to work yourself to exhaustion & constantly reminds you that you are not good enough -- no longer serving you?
If so, it's time to throw your Inner Critic a retirement party! All of the Inner Critic's non-stop condemning & censoring was a clever & creative way to survive the tough circumstances of your childhood, schooling & early career. It was brilliant in helping to position you to be able to thrive later. And you are grateful for how well those strong messages pulled you through those early years!
But the Gremlin has not kept up with you. The Voice is like the colleague who was the company superstar many decades ago & now dominates meetings with uninformed comments & grossly outdated advice.
Learn how to bid farewell to your Inner Critic & welcome the "new management" of your thoughts & actions -- one that understands how much you and your world have changed. Recognize how much more sophisticated, capable & resourced you are now. See how greatly your needs & values have changed. Understand how natural & beneficial it is for your Inner Critic to make its departure at this time -- & enjoy a new & productive way of managing your day and your life.
Are you being paid less than what you are worth, but you don't know what to do about it? Whether you are an employee receiving a salary, bonus & equity grants, a professional with an hourly rate or a business owner charging a fee for services, you deserve to be paid for the value you bring to your employer & clients.
This episode is your guide to establishing fee conviction & positioning yourself for higher compensation. Understand how your commercial worth is based upon the impact you deliver, not the hours you work. Shift your mindset from Scarcity's win/lose perspective & Work Ethic's tit-for-tat attitude to Abundance's win/win outlook. Gain practical tips for forming your pay goals & learn how to craft an effective implementation plan for higher pay.
Do you constantly strive to improve? Are you a highly accomplished person who strives to become even better? But does it seem as though the more that you develop, the more too that you deteriorate?
Overcome the common mistake of conflating self-improvement with self-care. True self-care is an ongoing tending to our needs. Faux self-care is an attempt at compensatory amending of self-abuse.
Learn to distinguish healthy self-discipline from brutal self-discipline. Gain practical skills to improve your self-care in ways that support your achieving your deepest goals -- & your sustaining of them for the long-term.
Many high achievers live under a spell of worry. Worrying gives many of us an illusion of control. We believe that we are being conscientious & responsible by worrying, but in truth we are draining our capacity.
Learn to preserve your energy, so that you are response-able -- that is, you are able to respond to whatever comes, when it comes. Understand the differences between worrying, preparing & taking action. Plan for what is likely to happen -- & learn to be more fit & ready for anything that may come, however unexpected. Tap into the worry-taming power of knowing your values & your intentions. And gain many other practical tips for combatting worry.
Is your intense desire a healthy want or a destructive addiction? Is the all-consuming focus of your time & attention -- for work, a relationship, a hobby, money or some other substance, item or behavior -- putting you on a path to heaven or the road to hell?
Can your drive & desire be satiated? Will attaining this goal or experience cause your world to become wider & richer -- or does it spur a progressive narrowing of your life?
Learn to gage whether what you crave or feel compelled to do is restricting & depleting you or opening you up to broader experiences & a more multi-faceted life. Has an all-consuming focus of your time & attention taken over? Reclaim your vibrant health, meaningful relationships & your ability to feel satisfied. Cultivate what you need more of in order to thrive & create a life that is balanced & abundant.
What should you do when you have made a mistake, personally or professionally? What is the best way to proceed when you have done something that hurt or harmed someone? How should you handle a relationship that is experiencing a contentious clash or a cordial but strained dynamics -- or one that has no contact at all?
Learn how to access whether a relationship is worth mending. Not all relationships should be mended; some relationships are better mourned. Develop your ability to determine whether or not to apologize. Explore how to hone the art of apologizing. Learn the four-step process of making an authentic apology -- one that is both heart-felt & effective: acknowledge, apologize, remedy & reassure.
Are you are feeling held down or held back? This episode will help you to understand how you are bound and why you are trapped -- and what you can do to break free.
Are you stuck due to your lack of control, lack of clarity or lack of courage? Is it that you have been trying to control the uncontrollable? Is it that you have not been clear as to what you need or want? Or is it that you have not been courageous and confident in taking action? Identify which of these obstacles constrains you and gain the power to unlock the chains that are keeping you stuck.
It's the anniversary of The Authenticity Coach podcast! One year ago today, on September 27, 2024, the first episode of the show was posted. Over the past year, there have been 55 episodes -- a new episode posted each Friday at 5 am.
If you have enjoyed the show, please be sure to follow the show & give it a five-star rating. Also, if you would like The Authenticity Coach podcast to continue, I could really use your support to grow its reach. Please tell your friends & colleagues why you love the show -- & select one of your favorite episodes to send to a few people you care about who could also benefit from listening.
I am so grateful for you -- your valuable time & your attention!
I invite you to connect with me directly. Thank you! Be well!
Are you tired or burnt out? Do you need a break in order to recharge, so that you can recover from exhaustion & return to work ready to go? Or do you need to break out, so that you can be released from demoralization & feel liberated to live in sync with your values?
Learn the key distinctions between feeling tired & being burnt out. Understand why these two states require different remedies. Gain practical approaches to mitigate the chronic cycle of feeling tired. These remedies include having a plan to refill your pitcher, managing your plate and developing your ability to "get silly" fast. Learn what you can -- & cannot -- do about burnout. Identify your internal & external avenues for shifting your career from oppressive to uplifting.
What's your filter? If you're seeking something, how will you know if you have found it? How will you go about determining whether a particular person, place or position aligns with what you truly want?
You need a practical process to vet opportunities. A personalized filter is the approach that enables you to screen possibilities to identify those that satisfy your dealbreakers. Learn how to create a custom filter by formulating what you will say, ask & observe.
Your physical environment matters. Your work & your life are impacted by what surrounds you. If you want your best energy to come out in a space, you must set up that area to support that energy.
Do you want to be more focused, reach a higher level of success, feel calmer, be more creative, be more supportive of others, convey greater gravitas, be more organized or increase your intensity? Whatever it is that you want to improve, making changes to your workspace can be a game-changer.
Whether you work in a home office, have a private on-site office, have your own cube or sit in open bench seating, investing a small amount of money & effort into upgrading your work area can yield large results.
Learn simple steps you can take to restore your dignity by cleaning up the dinginess. See what you can easily do to support better function by allowing for a smoother flow of work. Seize the powerful opportunity to maximize your performance by personalizing the space so that it inspires you & portrays the impression you want to make.
Experience the impact of creating a work environment that reflects how you want to feel & supports the results you want to achieve.
Creation requires conflict. Whether we are striking a match to start a fire, brainstorming to launch a business innovation or establishing rapport to engage in a worthwhile conversation, nothing can be created without there being friction.
Tap into the creative power of friction. Too much friction & we are worn down & defeated; not enough friction & we are untethered & unrefined. Meet the five types of people in regards to friction: the opponent, the commentator, the coach, the spectator & the cheerleader. Understand your level of tolerance for friction. Access how much friction currently surrounds you. Learn how to identify the type & degree of friction you require to create what you want to accomplish.
Look to the frog for three of life's greatest lessons. The wisdom & warnings of the proverbial frog guides us as to when we need to work hard & eat the frog, when we should welcome the help of others & kiss the frog and when we must jump out of dangerous waters so as not to be the frog who boils to death.
The frog reminds us to carefully consider when we are best served by doing more, doing with or doing less. Our frog teaches us the values of discipline & discovery as well as, at times, the function of distain -- & why it matters so much which of these principles we allow to command our decisions & actions in any given situation.
Learn how to identify whether you are being called to dive in, reach out or get out. Gain practical skills to help you to eat the frog, kiss a frog & avoid being a boiling frog.
Do you have a request that you want your supervisor to approve? Would you like the ideas that you propose to be well-received & implemented? Is it your desire to be highly valued by your organization for doing what you most love to do?
If so, learn why it is imperative to tie your passion, purpose & proposals to a compelling business reason. Develop a practice of identifying what is important to your decision-makers & learn to present each of your requests & ideas in a way that meets the needs of those individuals & aligns with the goals of the enterprise. Understand how to "make your case" so that you it is good for you -- & good for business.
Have you been called a control freak? What if the problem is not that you want to control, but that you are trying to control the wrong things?
Learn how you can gain greater control -- control that is real. Wield the power of focusing on what impacts you. Examine your "focus on me" flower and identify its petals of your needs & wants, your health, your resources & your integrity.
Gain the wisdom of staying in your own lane. Claim your power to refuse to tolerate so much. See how to spot where you do have control -- & where you don't. Begin to overcome the fearful state of believing that nothing good can come to you without your plotting, prodding & pushing for it. Recognize the existence of the unimaginable magic & mystery of the Universe -- & appreciate how the unplanned & unexpected can deliver gifts & bring about outcomes that surpass anything that you have attempted to make happen.
Have you been told that you need to show greater confidence & be more assertive? Or are you someone who has been told that you are too forceful & that you need to be softer & show more warmth?
Whether you are considered "too" gentle & timid or "too" harsh & intimidating, does it feel as though you are in a no-win situation? If you have been told that you must be more self-assured & strong in order to advance, you can choose to behave more aggressively -- & put yourself at the miserable risk of not being as well liked. Or if you are someone who is already quite commanding, you can decide to act in a more meek & weak manner -- but at the high cost of forfeiting a degree of your power & hard-won influence.
There is a way out of this dilemma. You can be both assertive & regarded with affection. You can be both powerful & popular. You achieve this by being more direct & more kind.
Understand directness & kindness in terms of spectrums. Explore examples of how to communicate in your own style that is high in both directness & kindness -- that is, being someone who is "lovingly honest." And become able to identify, in yourself & in others, behaviors that are not lovingly honest. Gain practical tips for becoming more direct & kinder.