Hello, beautiful people!
Today loads of short topics, from the curse of validation and the journey beyond, to self-discovery, intimacy in friendships, dating expectations, and declining birth rates.
When discussing relationships, we will highlight the benefits of intimate connections that nourish both sides and enriches their lives. Not only in case of romantic relationships but also, friends and family.
When landing on the topic of relationships we talk about the benefit of intimate relationships which are feeding you and you're able to enrich their lifes. That applies to romantic partners, friends and family. However, when we seek romantic partners based on societal expectations, we often look for the “perfect” person—someone who seems complete and ready—but we should consider giving chances to those we can grow with instead.
We understand that it’s easier to find someone who appears mature and organized, but most of us reach that level with support from others. At least one person has to believe in us and give us a chance. So, is it worth waiting for the ideal partner while we still have personal growth to do? It might be rewarding to start that journey alongside someone else.
As always we love you,
Niko & Klaudia
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Relevant links:
Modern Wisdom with Mads Larsen - The hidden truth about our collapsing birth rates.
Rich Roll and Esther Perel - Relationship Expert: this will destroy your relationship
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If you're struggling with your mental health, please get in touch with your loved ones, GP or mental health professionals.
Call 116 123 to talk to Samaritans, or email: jo@samaritans.org
You can call the National Suicide Prevention Helpline UK on 0800 689 5652
If you would prefer not to speak but want some mental health support, you could text SHOUT to 85258
Hello, beautiful people!
Welcome back after a few weeks of break! Busy lives, holidays, and here it comes four weeks later! Today, we start with a check-in with each other and beautiful proof of how self-awareness can be useful in your life. Niko talks about realising how his tiredness impacts information processing and learning and how we all need to sometimes just find the strength in accepting that we're weak and need a break.
Afterwards, we go into the enigmatic topic of cowboy builders of our minds and lives. We learn and shape throughout our entire life. Some things we learn because we want to, and our parents, school, culture, and environment are passing down some. All of this creates some sort of furnishing of our mind and life. Very rarely do we look inside and rethink the origins and current usefulness of those decor elements. Yet sometimes comes a moment when we learn something new, bring a skill, dream, person or just a thought, and despite us choosing to do so, it feels incredibly uncomfortable, out of place. And for some unknown reason, we're used to discarding the things which feel like this rather than looking inside and thinking, what is stopping me, blocking me, what is clashing there? So listen for why you shouldn't let the cowboy builders of your mind discard things that could make your life more interesting, better, or just a tiny bit more aligned with what you dream of.
The second part of the episode was a surprise for the two of us, too! We completely spontaneously discovered the dead end of Niko's autistic brain. We talk about empathy, emotions, understanding other people's perspectives, and how some people might not be capable of getting there. Like never, even if they try. How come you can cry during The Lion King but can't understand why you're making your girlfriend cry? How come you're kind, but some might see your behaviours as di**head moves?
Well, listen and learn with us!
Niko & Klaudia
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If you're struggling with your mental health, please get in touch with your loved ones, GP or mental health professionals.
Call 116 123 to talk to Samaritans, or email: jo@samaritans.org
You can call the National Suicide Prevention Helpline UK on 0800 689 5652
If you would prefer not to speak but want some mental health support, you could text SHOUT to 85258
Hello, beautiful people!
Today's episode covers a wide range of topics, but it ultimately focuses on the theme of learning and knowledge. We start by discussing the idea of not knowing and learning how to feel proud about it, inspired by Niko's daughter. We touch on why most people find it hard to admit when they don't understand something and why this can be disrespectful and stop them from learning something new.
Once again, the importance of knowledge and understanding comes into play. This concept highlights the risk of placing too much emphasis on measurable data or indicators, which can hinder our ability to comprehend the "what," "why," and "how" of our actions because not all indicators can be fully verified or replicated. We can relate this to our work, decision-making processes, and even our weightloss goals.
The last topic we open with a quote from Jerry Colonna: "How am I complicit in creating the conditions I say I don't want?" This question, when applied as a daily habit by a curious person who wants to change something in their life, can yield meaningful results. However, is it as simple as it sounds?
Listen for more, let us know what you think and subscribe!
As usual, we love you!
Niko & Klaudia
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If you're struggling with your mental health, please get in touch with your loved ones, GP or mental health professionals.
Call 116 123 to talk to Samaritans, or email: jo@samaritans.org
You can call the National Suicide Prevention Helpline UK on 0800 689 5652
If you would prefer not to speak but want some mental health support, you could text SHOUT to 85258
Hello, beautiful people!
When it comes to self-development, coaching, or therapy, nothing will happen by itself. You might consume plenty of books, spend dozens of hours and thousands of pounds on coaching and therapy, but you will not get the results you're looking for without putting tools and learning into practice.
Tools will not make your problems disappear. They will not obliterate learning difficulties, cure anxiety or depression, or erase a problematic childhood. However, they can make life more manageable.
Where do you start? The key is to keep trying and using the tools we learn, even if we fail at times.
We discuss gratitude practice, visualizations, journaling, breathing techniques, grounding techniques, routines, finding comfort in discomfort, but most of all, finding the key to success: compassion for yourself.
We're also talking about being enough and how the constant feeling of inadequacy and lack of purpose can be easily compared to chronic pain. You can get used to this, but it will linger and affect our lives, possibly at the worst times.
We explore the acceptance of all emotions and how all of the above connects to mental health and suicide crisis among men above the age of 40.
To learn more, keep listening.
As always, we love you!
Klaudia & Niko
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If you're struggling with your mental health, please get in touch with your loved ones, GP or mental health professionals.
Call 116 123 to talk to Samaritans, or email: jo@samaritans.org
You can call the National Suicide Prevention Helpline UK on 0800 689 5652
If you would prefer not to speak but want some mental health support, you could text SHOUT to 85258
Hello beautiful people!
Welcome back after a long break! We're coming back with stories of our Icelandic adventure. An over 100km trek through the most astonishing and ever-changing landscapes, some of which few have walked through. We started at Skógafoss waterfall, spending the night next to the infamous Baldvinsskáli hut with its raw and harsh surroundings. From there, we followed the Fimmvörðuháls hike to the magical land of Thórsmörk. Continuing on the Laugavegur trail, we ended our journey at the hot springs of Landmannalaugar.
However, this episode isn't just about the trek itself. It's about what we've learned and how our bodies and minds reacted to the change in our daily structure and living conditions. Most importantly, it's about how being prepared, both physically and equipped with appropriate gear, made the trek a pleasurable experience. Days later, it felt more like a retreat on Bali than a trek through rain, winds, black sands, snow, and lava fields.
We finish the episode with a metaphor leading us to our second topic: emotional fluidity. It's an ability to move freely between emotions and let them flow through you without resistance, defence, avoidance, and denial. This isn't something you wake up with one day. We have it as babies, but it disappears. The only way to get it back is to equip yourself with tools and strategies and, most importantly, train your heart, head, and gut to do so.
Listen for more, and from the bottom of our hearts, thank you for your time!
As always, we love you!
Klaudia & Niko
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Mentioned in the episode:
Act of Accomplishment - Emotional Fluidity
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If you're struggling with your mental health, please get in touch with your loved ones, GP or mental health professionals.
Call 116 123 to talk to Samaritans, or email: jo@samaritans.org
You can call the National Suicide Prevention Helpline UK on 0800 689 5652
If you would prefer not to speak but want some mental health support, you could text SHOUT to 85258
Hello beautiful people!
Welcome to today's episode, where we delve into the fascinating topics of progress, introspection, and patience. But what truly takes the spotlight is the interplay between positivity and the deeply ingrained negativity in our minds. We'll share our personal insights, explore the power and curse of lived experience, and equip you with practical tools to enhance your thinking patterns. And the best part? These tools are so simple, they're perfect for children too.
Negativity bias is one of the most fascinating phenomena we have encountered in recent months. Surprisingly, it is rarely spoken about and has been documented over 20 years ago! In short, negativity bias is the default of our brain to react stronger and quicker to negative stimuli - emotions, information, events and outcomes. Even though it could be observed already in 3-month babies, you can work on changing the wiring of your brain to be positively biased. In the episode, we discuss its origin and our steps to change how we change it, bit by bit. However, we also talk about our own negative biases, which we still process and notice at work and in our daily lives.
Throughout the episode, there's a lot about Niko's work and his belief that each person deserves a nonjudgmental and compassionate approach to others, especially if they went through hell: traumas, addiction, abuse, illness, etc. He also discusses how a positive work environment, acceptance, and understanding could not only help you achieve your true human and employee potential but also inspire personal growth.
This is one of the best episodes we've done so far. If not for Niko's full bladder, it would be even longer ;)
Listen, share and let us know what you think!
As always, we love you!
Niko & Klaudia
Mentioned in the podcast:
"Unstressable: A Practical Guide to Stress-Free Living" by Mo Gawdat and Alice Law
If you're struggling with your mental health, please get in touch with your loved ones, GP or mental health professionals.
mental health professionals.
Call 116 123 to talk to Samaritans, or email: jo@samaritans.org
You can call the National Suicide Prevention Helpline UK on 0800 689 5652
If you would prefer not to speak but want some mental health support, you could text SHOUT to 85258
Today, we’re discussing a healthy balance between self-discipline, accountability and self-compassion.
Kindness and self-compassion have been mentioned many times in our past episodes, but today, we’re talking about them as tools for getting out of the loop of guilt, shame, and quitting. There is a vast amount of research stating that self-compassion is one of the biggest promoters of positive outcomes for those suffering from depression, anxiety and trauma.
Yet, it’s important in every other aspect of our lives. In your workout routine, dietary choices, habits, and hobbies, We all fail and slip off, and actually, it’s needed to build resilience and the ability to bounce back.
This episode has so much more, so listen and let us know what you think!
As usual, we love you!
Niko & Klaudia
If you're struggling with your mental health, please get in touch with your loved ones, GP or mental health professionals.
mental health professionals.
Call 116 123 to talk to Samaritans, or email: jo@samaritans.org
You can call the National Suicide Prevention Helpline UK on 0800 689 5652
If you would prefer not to speak but want some mental health support, you could text SHOUT to 85258
Hello beautiful creatures!
Everything in this episode is based on our experiences and values, and it is not our intention to offend or argue with someone. Religion, beliefs, and spirituality are all about the things you've been exposed to, your upbringing, culture, and the feelings within you, as well as how all those connect.
Beliefs, spirituality, and religion are deeply personal matters, and it's rare to find two people who agree entirely on these grounds. It's not surprising that we, too, hold different perspectives. However, it's important to emphasize that all viewpoints are respected and valued in our discussion.
We discuss today our personal journeys, how our vision of god formed over years, our opinion about instituation of church, roots of the religion we've been brought up and how it changed over years with all we've learned and lived through.
We talk about our own way of believing and why religion-based hatred has no point whatsoever in our eyes. You'll learn what is difficult for us to understand and accept and why some of the things we believe in might be unnecceptable for you.
Finally learn what connects all of us, nevermind the religion or god you're following.
Enjoy and we hope you'll be happy and safe to share your opinion!
As always, we love you!
Klaudia & Niko
If you're struggling with your mental health, please get in touch with your loved ones, GP or mental health professionals.
mental health professionals.
Call 116 123 to talk to Samaritans, or email: jo@samaritans.org
You can call the National Suicide Prevention Helpline UK on 0800 689 5652
If you would prefer not to speak but want some mental health support, you could text SHOUT to 85258
Hello beautiful creatures!
Today, we start with a review of Jimmy Carr's recent book, and the quote from the book leads us to the topic of the episode.
"Give and forget, receive and remember"
In this episode, we will discuss altruism, kindness and giving back.
Why do we believe that these qualities are inherent in our nature? When we refer to our default mode, we are referring to the raw human being, stripped of all the experiences, illnesses, upbringing, mistakes and missteps that have shaped us over time.
The answer is simple: our evolution is intertwined with altruism, specifically reciprocal altruism (as proposed by Robert Trivers). Giving back creates a chain reaction of goodness, and research has shown that the more people help others, the more likely they are to receive help in the future. Furthermore, those who have been helped are more likely to pay it forward and help others in turn.
Studies have also shown that kindness and altruism play a critical role in our partner selection for reproduction and life. We are more likely to be attracted to someone who is kind to others, like a server in the restaurant or an older guy in the queue in the cinema. We want someone who is kind to our child's parents and our town's mayor. This phenomenon is also observed in the animal kingdom.
While there are certainly cruel and selfish individuals who only take and never give back, they are outliers or individuals who have forgotten or never experienced their default mode due to unfortunate life events.
Choosing to be kind and giving back leads to happiness and allows us and others to reap the benefits of these small acts. Each of us has a default mode of kindness encoded in our genes. Next time you think someone thinks wrong of you or judges you, remember that they have a default mode of kindness, as do you! So don't hurt yourself and others by projecting things; work on going back to the default mode.
As always, we love you!
Niko & Klaudia
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Mentioned in the episode:
"The Ape that Understood the Universe: How the Mind and Culture Evolve" by Steve Stewart-Williams
"Before & Laughter: A Life Changing Book" by Jimmy Carr
"Atlas of the Heart: Mapping Meaningful Connection and the Language of Human Experience" by Brené Brown
The article about computer simulation where Tit for Tat wins
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If you're struggling with your mental health, please get in touch with your loved ones, GP or mental health professionals.
mental health professionals.
Call 116 123 to talk to Samaritans, or email: jo@samaritans.org
You can call the National Suicide Prevention Helpline UK on 0800 689 5652
If you would prefer not to speak but want some mental health support, you could text SHOUT to 85258
I apologize, but I cannot see any errors in the original text you provided. However, I can certainly rephrase it to make it more clear and easier to understand.
Greetings, lovely individuals!
For a long time, medical professionals and scientists believed that the mind and body were separate entities. However, recent research has shown that the mind and beliefs have a direct impact on our physical health, including our organs and brain. It is now clear that the mind and body are one system.
Today, we'll start with some excellent examples of how the mind and body interact and then move on to self-awareness (again!) Specifically, we'll examine how a lack of basic needs can impact self-awareness for many people.
This leads us to the important topic of poverty. Poverty can have a misleading definition, with many still picturing it as it was in the 19th century: hunger, homelessness, and begging on the streets. Unfortunately, this is still a reality for some people in the 21st century. There are individuals in the UK who die due to malnutrition and exposure to the cold.
However, poverty is much more than these visible signs. It has a significant impact on mental health, causing anxiety, stress, and constant worry. Those who experience poverty feel shame, guilt, and a lack of self-confidence, often feeling the need to hide their situation yet knowing that they are poor.
Please take a moment to reflect and share your own perception of poverty.
As always, we love you!
Niko & Klaudia
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Mentioned in the book:
The Mindful Body: Thinking Our Way to Chronic Health by Ellen J. Langer
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If you're struggling with your mental health, please get in touch with your loved ones, GP or mental health professionals.
mental health professionals.
Call 116 123 to talk to Samaritans, or email: jo@samaritans.org
You can call the National Suicide Prevention Helpline UK on 0800 689 5652
If you would prefer not to speak but want some mental health support, you could text SHOUT to 85258
Hey there, beautiful creatures!
In today's episode, we're discussing transition points in our lives and how they can be made easier with the help of connections.
In the previous episode, we mentioned that, on average, we experience around 30 life changes. Some of these changes occur during transition periods, such as the shift from childhood to adolescence and adolescence to adulthood. Another significant transition occurs when we move from adulthood to old age, which typically happens around retirement age. As a result, support providers, psychologists, and various third and first-sector projects are becoming increasingly interested in these stages of life. In short, we all know that young and elderly people require assistance with these changes.
However, what happens in the middle? We reach middle age between the ages of 37 and 50 (or sometimes 40 to 60). Middle-aged crises are often the subject of jokes, movies, and ridicule, but in reality, it is a time when we require support to reassess our lives. This period could be an opportunity to utilise our wisdom and experience to flourish and transform.
This transition topic leads us to the importance of connection. To navigate this change, we need time and stronger connections. We need to connect with ourselves, our needs, and the people around us, especially those who have gone through similar experiences. However, the system does not always give us the time to process our thoughts and feelings. Imagine being 40 years old, with almost grown children and a successful (hopefully) career, but suddenly experiencing doubts, frustration and a sense of resignation.
Now, imagine someone allowing you to take a sabbatical from life. A month, three months or even six months to step away from the hustle and to focus on yourself and your needs, to figure out what's next, what lies ahead.
Imagine being part of a community where people from different generations and backgrounds come together to listen, guide, and support one another. Wouldn't that be comforting?
That's why Klaudia wants to start organising events called "Generations Over Dinner," "Generations Over Coffee," or even "Generations in the Forest." If you've listened to the end of this episode and would like to participate in something like this or support this idea, please find Klaudia on Instagram or Facebook (Klaudia Dziemianko) and message us!
And please, please listen to the podcast episode linked below to let the words of brilliant Chip Conley sink in.
As always, we love you!
Klaudia and Niko
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Mentioned in the episode:
Rich Roll and Chip Conley - Midlife is a chrysalis, not a crisis.
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If you're struggling with your mental health, please get in touch with your loved ones, GP or mental health professionals.
mental health professionals.
Call 116 123 to talk to Samaritans, or email: jo@samaritans.org
You can call the National Suicide Prevention Helpline UK on 0800 689 5652
If you would prefer not to speak but want some mental health support, you could text SHOUT to 85258
Hello, hello beautiful creatures!
Change, choice, compassion - the three C's of this episode.
Change is an unavoidable part of life. On average, a person experiences around 30 significant changes throughout their lifetime, such as changing jobs, getting married, having children, losing loved ones, suffering from major illnesses, and moving homes. However, most people tend to live by a system of order and disorder and then struggle to regain order. In reality, there is no such thing as a permanent state of order. A healthier approach to life is based on resilience, flexibility, and adaptability, which means accepting and adapting to the natural cycle of disorder, reorder, and then back to disorder, and so on. The constant development of our internal state and external environment guarantees that we will never be the same as we were yesterday. Therefore, fighting for something without the right to exist is pointless.
We always have a choice to live and adapt as we want. Have you ever imagined a life where AI takes care of everything, from what you eat and drink to what supplements to take and when to sleep? This part of the episode also discusses the role of AI in our lives in the coming decades, new species of humans, and the unprecedented times we're living in.
We can witness the development of a new human species and even co-exist together, but it all depends on compassion and kindness. We need to root compassion and kindness in our lives, our communities, and the way we speak and treat each other. If we make a shift towards better choices, we can make a positive impact on ourselves, our loved ones, and those to come.
Listen for more!
As always, we love you!
Klaudia & Niko
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Mentioned in the episode:
"Master of Change: How to Excel When Everything Is Changing – Including You" by Brad Stulberg
If you're struggling with your mental health, please get in touch with your loved ones, GP or mental health professionals.
mental health professionals.
Call 116 123 to talk to Samaritans, or email: jo@samaritans.org
You can call the National Suicide Prevention Helpline UK on 0800 689 5652
If you would prefer not to speak but want some mental health support, you could text SHOUT to 85258
Hello, amazing creatures!
As usual, the topic of the episode you're listening to comes out of our daily lives.
We will share some tips and habits that helped us improve your sleep quality, even if you are pressed for time. Additionally, we will explore how mindset and anticipation can impact the perceived quality of sleep.
We follow with the completely new in our life experience. Being able to make your dreams come true and yet choose not to go for it. It's a great feeling when you have the power to make a change in your life but still stay true to your needs and feelings. By communicating with yourself and loved ones, you can choose a different path. In our case, we decided not to buy a new house and move but instead stay where we are and appreciate what we have.
Finally, we end with the motto of this year's episodes (accidentally discovered): for us, the only way to lead a happy life is to stick to what is here and now - the presence. Work hard on yourself and enjoy the person you've created cause this person is only here and now.
As always, we love you!
Niko & Klaudia
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Mentioned in the episode
Tim Ferris and Andy Galpin - all facts mentioned about sleep and nutrition
If you're struggling with your mental health, please get in touch with your loved ones, GP or mental health professionals.
Call 116 123 to talk to Samaritans, or email: jo@samaritans.org
You can call the National Suicide Prevention Helpline UK on 0800 689 5652
If you would prefer not to speak but want some mental health support, you could text SHOUT to 85258
Hello, amazing creatures!
In today's episode, we're discussing accepting that, in most cases, we're the masterminds behind our success but also the less favourable results of our actions. Confucious said:
"Although the wise man may be strict on himself, he demands nothing of others. He is satisfied with the way he is and never complains to heaven or blames others for his lot in life. In this lowly position, therefore, he submits to fate. The foolish man, on the other hand, in seeking the good things of this earth, falls into danger.
"When an arrow misses its target, the archer blames himself and not someone else. That is how the wise man behaves."
When good things happen, we often take credit for our successes and feel proud. However, when we face challenges, make mistakes, or encounter failures, we often look for external factors to blame. It's not uncommon for people to use their past experiences or circumstances as an excuse for not taking action or lacking motivation to improve themselves. It's a little trip back to the last episode and discussion about Adler's Psychology. We should accept the possibility of failing and not use our past as an excuse. We should allow ourselves to create a better future that is not defined by what happened to us in the past.
In the second part of the episode, we have a heated discussion about the meaning of vulnerability inspired by the conversation between Adam Grant and Brene Brown (link at the end)
Many people understand vulnerability as an emotional exposure, openly talking about our feelings or admitting to something. So, we're discussing our definition of vulnerability and how psychologists define it. Somewhere there, we stumble upon topics of racism, exclusion and questioning the status quo.
Listen, comment, share.
As always, we love you.
Niko & Klaudia
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Mentioned in the episode
Adam Grant and Brene Brown on the power of knowing what you don't know.
If you're struggling with your mental health, please get in touch with your loved ones, GP or mental health professionals.
Call 116 123 to talk to Samaritans, or email: jo@samaritans.org
You can call the National Suicide Prevention Helpline UK on 0800 689 5652
If you would prefer not to speak but want some mental health support, you could text SHOUT to 85258
Hello, amazing people! Or creatures and plants!
Today's episode goes deeper into two topics. The first one emerged from the simple question we always ask each other - how you've been recently - and goes on about Adler's psychology.
Klaudia's first book of 2024, "The Courage to Be Disliked" by Fumitake Koga and Ichiro Kishimi, initially made her want to discard it after 20 pages due to Adler Psychology's denial of trauma.
However, she promised to explore beyond her interests and persisted. The book treated Adler Psychology (individual psychology) like a philosophy of life, offering valuable lessons. From this, she has learned and truly believed in concepts of the pursuit of superiority, taking only your own personal tasks, living without reward and punishment of others, courage to be disliked, community feeling and contribution to others.
The second topic is the Goggins effect, named after Huberman, which refers to changes in the anterior cingulate cortex, a part of our brain responsible for motivation, emotions, and decision-making. Consistent engagement in unpleasant activities leads to the enlargement of this area, which is smaller in obese individuals and more extensive in regular exercisers, athletes, and those consistently doing despised activities. To maintain its effect, one must repeatedly engage in unpleasant activities, and once they start enjoying them, the effect disappears. Additionally, people with a small anterior cingulate cortex lose their will to live.
We end the episode with Klaudia's emotional story from the sauna.
As always, we love you!
Niko & Klaudia
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Mentioned in the episode:
Huberman Lab - David Goggins: How to Build Immense Inner Strength
Modern Wisdom - Master Your Mind & Change Your Brain (4K) - Andrew Huberman
The Art of Asking by Amanda Palmer
Your Brain on Art: How the Arts Transform Us by Susan Magsamen, Ivy Ross
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If you're struggling with your mental health, please get in touch with your loved ones, GP or mental health professionals.
Call 116 123 to talk to Samaritans, or email: jo@samaritans.org
You can call the National Suicide Prevention Helpline UK on 0800 689 5652
If you would prefer not to speak but want some mental health support, you could text SHOUT to 85258
For the last time in 2023: Good morning! Good evening!
This episode is a reflection on the past 12 months. What was 2023 about?
For Klaudia, it was time for relationships, transformation and consistency. Finishing uni and moving to professional life. Finally, the accident in April which changed a lot; it was a blessing in disguise, which formed new habits, changed how she listened to her body and made her understand the meaning of limitations. This gave her a different view of Niko's autism and depression.
For Niko, it was the year of self-awareness and acceptance. He focused on growth as a father, writer and creator. That awareness, acceptance of autistic traits and inflictions and, most of all, building routines helped him to take care of his mental health.
We both learned that you can't control everything, but you can control how you react to what life serves you.
What will 2024 look like? We will see! For now, we wish you a year in which you'll have space and time to be true to yourself, at least in one aspect of your life and be self-aware.
As always, we love you!
Niko & Klaudia
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If you're struggling with your mental health, please get in touch with your loved ones, GP or mental health professionals.
Call 116 123 to talk to Samaritans, or email: jo@samaritans.org
You can call the National Suicide Prevention Helpline UK on 0800 689 5652
If you would prefer not to speak but want some mental health support, you could text SHOUT to 85258
Good morning! Good evening!
In today's episode, we discuss the difficulties coming with the festive time for many people worldwide. Many people enjoy Christmas and New Year, and it's a beautiful and magical time with warmth, a full house and happiness. Yet, as we look at our own experiences from childhood and how they changed how we perceive this holiday time, it makes us consider other possibilities.
We do not want to take joy away from you. All we want to do is open our eyes to the possibility that the next person you wish a great Christmas might face 10 days with a perpetrator, financial worries, boundaries being pushed to the limits or another year of faking it for the sake of others.
So today, we wish you a festive time, which is all about what you want and need. A time of safety and genuine comfort.
As always, we love you!
Niko & Klaudia
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If you're struggling with your mental health, please get in touch with your loved ones, GP or mental health professionals.
Call 116 123 to talk to Samaritans, or email: jo@samaritans.org
You can call the National Suicide Prevention Helpline UK on 0800 689 5652
If you would prefer not to speak but want some mental health support, you could text SHOUT to 85258
Good morning! Good evening!
Today's episode goes into two topics, both equally important. The first part is about making amends and accepting that sometimes you might not be forgiven. The second is about setting boundaries and why we even need boundaries.
When you reflect on the actions of your younger self, you will find plenty of things you could do better and plenty of people you've hurt. Not every one undertakes the task of rectifying past mistakes. However, those who do must accept that not everyone will forgive or forget. They have a right to do so; they have their perspective and side of the story, and getting it is a part of your healing journey.
Now, onto boundaries. A hard border like that between North and South Korea is unmistakable. It requires adherence to specific rules. Those are your rigid boundaries, those situations when you instantly know, "No, stop. I'm not ok with this". Similarly, there's the Schengen zone, where boundaries are more flexible, allowing smoother transitions but easier to push, bend and abuse.
The skill of setting healthy boundaries is often misunderstood and associated with egoism and excuses. Why? Because establishing and executing boundaries places you in a position of power, asserting control over what is deemed acceptable. With practice, this skill becomes more refined, and you become more confident in spotting other people's boundaries even when you're still in the Schengen zone.
Listen for more!
As always, we love you!
Niko & Klaudia
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If you're struggling with your mental health, please get in touch with your loved ones, GP or mental health professionals.
Call 116 123 to talk to Samaritans, or email: jo@samaritans.org
You can call the National Suicide Prevention Helpline UK on 0800 689 5652
If you would prefer not to speak but want some mental health support, you could text SHOUT to 85258
Good morning! Good evening!
We're starting off with the usual week check. What's happening in our lives, and how does that make us feel? Here's work, recent events, and all of those.
This episode moved us to the topic of the 2nd stage of therapy - the overwhelming mess and dirt we dig out - followed by the family dynamic and unique perspectives of each family member. When it comes to therapy, a lot of people go through this moment where all suppressed memories, the things we have disassociated ourselves from to protect our fragile minds, are finally emerging. It's like a massive refurbishment, with dust and dirt covering everything, and cleaning one spot doesn't make the rest of the mess disappear. It's a tough stage for many reasons, but the point is that without digging out everything that stinks, we will let it rot and eat us from the inside. And here comes the thing: What stinks for us might not even exist for our parents, siblings, or other relatives - a different perspective.
The last part is born again from the question. This time we go for: "If there would be one thing you would like to change in your childhood, what would that be?". Here comes a lot of personal stuff from both Niko and Klaudia. It all might sound like a therapy session live during the podcast, but if anyone finds themselves in a similar situation answering the same question, you should know that there's a chance one day you will answer it without regret, resentment, hate and pain. And that's why we do what we do :)
As usual, we love you!
Klaudia & Niko
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If you're struggling with your mental health, please get in touch with your loved ones, GP or mental health professionals.
Call 116 123 to talk to Samaritans, or email: jo@samaritans.org
You can call the National Suicide Prevention Helpline UK on 0800 689 5652
If you would prefer not to speak but want some mental health support, you could text SHOUT to 85258
Good evening, good morning!
This episode is about awareness, accepting your afflictions and fighting old habits. And all of it links with happiness and what we need to do to achieve it.
Arthurs C. Brooks says that the data points towards four areas of our life directly impacting our level of happiness: faith/philosophy, family, friends and meaningful work (actual job or hobbies which have deep meaning to us). Listen to find out if we agree and what happiness means to us.
Niko & Klaudia
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Mentioned in the episode:
Quote by Chris Williamson:
"Ultimately happiness comes down to choosing between the discomfort of becoming aware of your mental afflictions or the discomfort of becoming ruled by them."
Andrew Huberman and Adam Grant - How to Unlock Your Potential, Motivation & Unique Abilities
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If you're struggling with your mental health, please get in touch with your loved ones, GP or mental health professionals.
Call 116 123 to talk to Samaritans, or email: jo@samaritans.org
You can call the National Suicide Prevention Helpline UK on 0800 689 5652
If you would prefer not to speak but want some mental health support, you could text SHOUT to 85258