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The Exploring Introvert with Mariella Franker, PhD
Mariella Franker, PhD
100 episodes
2 hours ago
You’re in the right place if you’re an introvert who wants to use your strengths to make meaningful contributions to others and take better care of yourself. I'm Mariella: a molecular biologist, certified habit coach, business owner, parent, and introvert :-) Every first Thursday of the month, I share an update with my most eye-opening lessons. You’ll learn about important topics for introverts - like reducing tiredness, discovering what naturally motivates you, and strengthening relationships in a way that feels natural - from my experience and from other exploring introverts like you.
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You’re in the right place if you’re an introvert who wants to use your strengths to make meaningful contributions to others and take better care of yourself. I'm Mariella: a molecular biologist, certified habit coach, business owner, parent, and introvert :-) Every first Thursday of the month, I share an update with my most eye-opening lessons. You’ll learn about important topics for introverts - like reducing tiredness, discovering what naturally motivates you, and strengthening relationships in a way that feels natural - from my experience and from other exploring introverts like you.
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Entrepreneurship
Business
Episodes (20/100)
The Exploring Introvert with Mariella Franker, PhD
090 Sept update: Live from Suriname

Unexpected news this week. For this Sept update, I'm coming live to you from Suriname after hearing that my father is ill. When you're a cross-cultural introvert and you live abroad, these situations are tough.🧭 Sign up for Exploring Introvert newsletter: ⁠thefrankermessage.com/subscribe⁠⁠⁠

📍 Visit my website: ⁠⁠thefrankermessage.com⁠

⁠📧 Email me: ⁠contact@thefrankermessage.com⁠)

🔗 Find me on ⁠LinkedIn ⁠or ⁠Instagram⁠: @mariellafranker

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3 months ago
7 minutes 44 seconds

The Exploring Introvert with Mariella Franker, PhD
089 July monthly update: finding my mission as an introvert coach

In this intimate monthly update, I'm sharing the evolution of my coaching practice and this podcast as we head into summer. While I'll be taking a podcast break in August, I'm excited to continue working with clients and developing new programs that better serve our community of thoughtful explorers.

Last month's Habit Building Basics taster sessions revealed how powerful it is when introverts build habits aligned with their natural energy patterns. We explored the fundamental differences in how introverts process information internally before sharing ideas with others, and how this understanding can transform our approach to creating sustainable habits.

As an introvert myself, I'm currently in what I call the "connecting the dots phase" with my business - that nervous energy when you sense things coming together in your mind, but can't quite articulate them clearly yet. This reflective process takes time and can feel frustrating, but it's essential to honor this uniquely introvert way of processing and integrating information.

After months of careful reflection, I've clarified my mission: I help cross-cultural introverts build sustainable habits so they can grow and find fulfillment in their careers without exhaustion or guilt about how they spend their time.

My focus is now specifically on supporting introverts who navigate multiple cultural contexts - whether you're working in multicultural environments, have relocated internationally, or professionally engage with diverse cultures. I've worked with literature scientists amplifying marginalized voices, diplomats transitioning between countries, and academics adapting to new cultural settings.

The habit-building approaches I teach are designed specifically for the introvert mind, recognizing our need for deeper processing time, meaningful connections, and sustainable energy management. By working with your Natural Advantage® rather than against it, you'll discover how to create lasting habits that support your growth without burnout.

The podcast will return in September. In the meantime, you might see new content formats as I experiment with different ways to serve this community.

Thank you for being part of this journey. Remember that as introverts, our strength lies not in forcing ourselves into extroverted systems, but in creating thoughtful practices that honor our unique processing style.

Connect with me via email, Instagram, or LinkedIn before the next episode. Have a wonderful summer of exploration!

#IntrovertHabits #CrossCulturalIntroverts #HabitBuilding

🧭 Sign up for Exploring Introvert newsletter: thefrankermessage.com/subscribe⁠⁠

📍 Visit my website: ⁠thefrankermessage.com

⁠📧 Email me: [⁠contact@thefrankermessage.com⁠](mailto: contact@thefrankermessage.com)

🔗 Find me on LinkedIn or Instagram: @mariellafranker

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5 months ago
11 minutes 22 seconds

The Exploring Introvert with Mariella Franker, PhD
088 Revisiting BASB by Tiago Forte (most popular episode)

Hi there, explorers! This month has been all about getting things ready for the Habit Building Basics Tasters that are happening next week. Most of my time working hours has been going towards that.

You can sign up here: ⁠https://go.thefrankermessage.com/welcometobacktobasics⁠

On a personal note, we're doing some small renovations and it's pretty messy in our home. Our son has a tent going on in the living room, he calls it his secret laboratory...

My son and I are also participating in the five-kilometer, four-day walk (avond 4 daagse). It's a big thing in the Netherlands. 5 km is a lot for a little kid – it takes us about 2 hours. But it’s actually a lot of fun and the whole neighborhood comes out, people stand along the sidewalks to give candy to the kids and cheer you on. Today is the last night, wish us luck!

Instead of our usual monthly update, we’re revisiting a previous episode this time.

I’ve been talking to a lot of people about Building a Second Brain(BASB), the book by Tiago Forte.

This is a topic that a lot of people are interested in. It's one of the most popular episodes of the Exploring Introvert, so this topic is definitely going to come back!

Let’s revisit the previous episode where I tell you all about Tiago Forte’s system and maybe it can give you some ideas of how BASB could be helpful to you.


✅ Join Habit Building Basics: ⁠https://go.thefrankermessage.com/welcometobacktobasics⁠

📍Visit my website: ⁠thefrankermessage.com⁠

📧 Email me: ⁠contact@thefrankermessage.com⁠

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6 months ago
18 minutes 5 seconds

The Exploring Introvert with Mariella Franker, PhD
087 Habit building for cross-cultural introverts (energy management that works) | Season 4

** If you found this podcast helpful, please share it with a friend! I'll be super grateful and your friend will be happy that you thought of them too 🤗 **


In today’s podcast episode we’re talking specifically about cross-cultural introverts.


What’s a cross-cultural introvert? A cross-cultural introvert is an introvert who navigates multiple cultural. They’re people who move between cultures whether you’re working abroad or you’re bringing your multicultural perspective to your work or professional role.


What’s unique for cross-cultural introverts is that you need to balance your natural introverted character with the demands of navigating multiple cultural contexts.


When you’re “in between” cultures like that, it’s normal to feel a little out of place.


A lot of introverts I know have a similar experience when it comes to being an introvert. You feel slightly out of place because, let’s face it, the world is still geared mostly towards extraverts, especially in Western cultures. A lot of introvert are told that they need to change themselves in order to be accepted, appreciated or successful.


I've learned that actually the opposite it true.


In this podcast episode you'll learn why and discover what actually works to manage your energy well and feel confident as an introvert, no matter how circumstances change.


You’ll also learn about the taster sessions Habit Building Basics for cross-cultural introverts. 5 days, 5 topics, 15 minutes a day to help you rethink your habits and figure out what actually works.


Sign up for Habit Building Basics here: http://go.thefrankermessage.com/welcometobacktobasics


---

00:00 the Exploring Introvert monthly update

00:44 what's a cross-cultural introvert

02:23 when you’re not really a local (anymore)

03:37 feeling out of place (in between cultures and as an introvert)

04:08 what does this have to do with energy management?

05:09 why most traditional advice doesn't work

08:23 why you need personal pillar habits

10:04 What I've been up to this month

10:59 Habit Building Basics: 5-day taster for cross-cultural introverts

12:05 what exactly is a taster?

13:27 get a personal focus session worth €150,- for free

13:59 Habit Building Basics: 5 days, 5 topics, 15 minutes a day

15:26 recap of the main take aways

---

Sign up for Habit Building Basics: http://go.thefrankermessage.com/welcometobacktobasics

Related episodes:

🎦 010 Are you a "low energy person”?

🎦 054 Introverts lack discipline and have no energy...?


⭐ Follow the podcast: Exploring Introvert with Mariella Franker, PhD

⭐ Contact me: contact@thefrankermessage.com⁠⁠

⭐ Visit my website: ⁠⁠thefrankermessage.com

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7 months ago
16 minutes 59 seconds

The Exploring Introvert with Mariella Franker, PhD
086 From reels to real life: how breaking one bad habit gave me back 6 hours a day

Breaking a Bad Habit: An Introvert's Journey from Social Media Exhaustion to Mindful Language Learning

Ever found yourself doom scrolling through social media when you're exhausted, only to feel more drained afterward? As an introvert and certified habit coach, I discovered one day that I was spent 6 hours on Instagram reels.

It was a wake up call!

What started as a way to "relax" turned into a vicious cycle of exhaustion and procrastination.

In this video, I'll share my personal experience and the science behind breaking a bad habit.

You'll learn:

  • Why the 21-day habit building rule is actually a myth (but can still be useful!)
  • How to use the science of habit loops to transform your habits
  • A practical example of how I replaced social media doom scrolling with more productive activities
  • Why consistency matters less than you might think


If you're an introvert struggling with energy management and finding yourself caught in unhealthy habits, this video will show you how you can start to change that.

Plus, discover how I went from 6 hours of reels to learning Spanish, getting better sleep, and feeling more accomplished at the end of each day. This isn't just about breaking a bad habit - it's about creating sustainable changes that work with your energy needs as an introvert.

Subscribe for more insights on habit building, energy management, and productivity strategies specifically designed for introverts.


---

00:00 This month I dove into habit formation and breaking a bad habit

00:43 My experiment to stop doom scrolling on IG reels

01:41 When relaxation turns into a bad habit

02:53 Truths and myths: How long before a habit become automatic and how important is consistency really?

03:15 Three elements of habit building: CUE - BEHAVIOR - REWARD

04:30 What’s the 21-day rul?

07:30 You don't need to repeat a habit every day for it to be effective

07:49 Even though it's a myth, the 21-day rule can still be useful

09:07 How important is it to be consistent?

10:47 breaking a bad habit: replacing doom scrolling with language learning

14:03 What can you learn about habit building from this?

---

🧭 Sign up for The Exploring Introvert Letters: https://go.thefrankermessage.com/subscribe

📍 Visit my website: ⁠https://www.thefrankermessage.com/

⁠🔗 Follow me on LinkedIn @mariellafranker

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8 months ago
15 minutes 30 seconds

The Exploring Introvert with Mariella Franker, PhD
085 | Too busy and tired? 4 habits to stay sane | Season 4

Too busy or too tired? Here are 4 habits to stay sane.Here’s a question that I get all the time: what habits do you focus on when things are really hectic and you have no time?This month has been just that, so I thought I’d take you on a walk today and we can talk about it. What has made this month so hectic is that I’ve taken on a project that I knew from the start was going to be a difficult project. It involves a lot of different people and there’s a lot of emotions and even some conflicts. I decided to take it on because I know that I’m the right person to help right now. But it’s a difficult situation and I knew really early on that this project was going to take a lot out of me. Now, if you’re working in a team or organization, you may not always be able to pick your projects. So maybe you’ve been in a similar situation where you have a project where you immediately know that it’s going to be hard. What can you do to still do a good job and keep your sanity at the same time?Come with me on my walk today and we’ll talk about 4 habits to keep your sanity in hectic times.00:00 Habits for hectic times00:49 Tricky project this month01:34 4 habits to keep your sanity with a difficult project02:19 Accepting that it's going to cost more energy03:18 Habit #1: how to set boundaries05:05 Habit #2 & #3: process and recharge07:07 Habit #4 Peace of mind habits09:17 Focus on what's most meaningful---🧭 Sign up for The Exploring Introvert newsletter: thefrankermessage.com/subscribe⁠⁠📍 Visit my website: ⁠thefrankermessage.com⁠🔗 Follow me on LinkedIn @mariellafranker

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9 months ago
11 minutes 22 seconds

The Exploring Introvert with Mariella Franker, PhD
084 | Knowing how to pace yourself is an undervalued skill, especially for introverts | Season 4

January was a hectic month for 3 reasons: 1) My partner moved his gym to a new location, 2) We started the year off with a very sick little boy, 3) I worked on aligning The Exploring Introvert.

Despite needing to clear my schedule for part of the month to care for our kid and to manage logistics at home with the gym move, I made good progress.

The new home page of my website is out (have a look here)

And you can now find The Exploring Introvert on all my social channels.

Although I’m only active on LinkedIn at the moment, I aligned all my socials to make them consistent. Of course, I’ll still be tweaking things here and there (I love to tweak things) the ‘red thread’ is there and I love seeing it all come together!

Despite making good progress under the circumstances, my inner critic did flare up.

Criticizing everything from my parenting choices to my work attitude.

“Shouldn’t you take your kid to the hospital? Why are you even working? You should be here 100% for your child. You’re such a bad mother.”

“Why didn’t you get more done for work this week? Yes, your child is sick but you’re a business owner and you should be getting after it.”

“Look at that post, that person is doing so much better than you. I knew it, you’re never going to make this business work.”

Have you noticed that when you’re especially tired, the inner critic becomes louder?

The inner critic can get downright nasty. Comparing you to others and pointing out all the tiny mistakes that you’re making. Like a bully blasting an annoying song on repeat.

The critic can hold on to old patterns (one of mine is to forgo rest and to give everything that I have, only to run on empty). The critic can suck up the little energy that you have left. It will try to push you to do things that make sense on paper but that typically take you farther away from what you really need. Proper mental rest.

That’s why I believe that knowing how to pace yourself is an undervalued skill, especially for introverts. Learn more in this month’s update.


---


00:00 My biggest lesson this month: knowing how to pace yourself is an undervalued skill

01:18 Moving my partner's gym

03:01 Combining family and career

05:42 Further aligning 🧭 The Exploring Introvert

07:38 Building a support network as an entrepreneur

08:54 Learning to pace myself

11:04 “If you only have 40% and you gave 40%, then you gave 100%” - Jim Kwik

11:40 If you’re an introvert with a strong inner critic

---


🧭 Sign up for The Exploring Introvert newsletter: thefrankermessage.com/subscribe⁠⁠


📍 Visit my website: ⁠thefrankermessage.com⁠


🔗 Follow me on LinkedIn @mariellafranker

---

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10 months ago
13 minutes 19 seconds

The Exploring Introvert with Mariella Franker, PhD
083 | What taking on too much last month taught me about what to keep and what to let go | Season 4

Between the busy-ness of the Christmas Holidays, my partner getting injured and a big (first time) project for my business, this one is full of ups and downs.

In this podcast, I tell you about what has been happening behind the scenes in my business, why I was absent from the podcast for 3 months and the lessons I’ve learned.

You’ll also learn how you can get exclusive behind the scenes access to how I organize things in my daily life as a work-from home mom, business owner and fellow introvert.

---

00:00 This month’s update

00:17 Christmas busy-ness

01:37 A business that runs without me

03:37 Setting up The Exploring Introvert

04:03 World Introvert Day

05:15 Behind the scenes

08:12 Community

08:56 This month's lessons

10:15 Get exclusive insider access

11:10 What to keep and what to let go

---

✨ Sign up for the exclusive insider series: go.thefrankermessage.com/insider

🧭 Sign up for The Exploring Introvert newsletter: thefrankermessage.com/subscribe⁠⁠

📍 Visit my website: ⁠thefrankermessage.com⁠

🔗 Follow me on LinkedIn @mariellafranker

---

I choose the resources below out of my own interest and I share them with you to give you context. I’m not affiliated with anyone mentioned in this podcast episode.

📖 https://www.introvert.day/

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11 months ago
12 minutes 29 seconds

The Exploring Introvert with Mariella Franker, PhD
082 | Saying goodbye to Productive Introvert Community | Season 4

I’ve been a bit absent from the podcast but a lot has been happening behind the scenes. A short chapter today to update you on what’s been going on and what’s coming for the podcast. We’re talking about one word that ties this community of introverts together and the NEW NAME OF THE PODCAST!

We’re also taking on a new format for the podcast: fewer but more regular updates once a month. New monthly updates will be released now every first Thursday of the month. We’ll look back at the past month and what I’m currently researching, experimenting with, and what I’ve learned.

If you want a little bit more or prefer written summaries, sign up for my newsletter 🧭 THE EXPLORING INTROVERT for my best eye-opening and empowering lessons for introverts in your inbox twice a month: thefrankermessage.com/subscribe⁠

I’m excited - and a little bit nervous - about these changes. I’m working hard to improve the podcast and I’ll do my very best to make it worth while your attention.

Thank you for hanging out with me today, have a great Christmas, and I’ll see you again on January 2nd 👋


---

00:00 Update and what’s been happening behind the scenes

00:28 The Exploring Introvert (new podcast name!!)

01:26 Tying it together

02:19 What’s going to happen?

03:37 New chapters once a month

04:49 Sign up for The Exploring Introvert newsletter

05:40 See you again on Jan 2nd!

---


Sign up for 🧭 The Exploring Introvert newsletter: ⁠thefrankermessage.com/subscribe⁠ Visit my website: thefrankermessage.com


Follow me on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/mariellafranker/

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12 months ago
5 minutes 49 seconds

The Exploring Introvert with Mariella Franker, PhD
081 | Taking 2 months off work: my version of a think week | Season 4

Taking longer periods of time off from work has been a long standing dream of mine. I never thought it would be possible for me and I was always happy to get the rare 2 weeks off per year. Usually, I barely felt refreshed after 2 weeks off and the cycle would start again.

When I started my coaching business, I realized that I had the opportunity to make this dream a reality. I decided that if I really wanted to take a couple of months off per year, that I would start practicing. 

I’ve taken 2 months off work during the summer holidays for the third year now, reducing my workload to 1-2 hours a day and spending the rest of the time with my family and traveling.

You could say that, at the moment, this is my version of Bill Gates’ famous think week: a week with no distractions that Bill Gates spends in a cabin in the woods to think about his professional and personal decisions.

In today’s chapter, I’m sharing with you why a “think week” is an invaluable way to check your compass and to step away from the busy-ness of every day life so that you can do re-focus on the things that are meaningful to you.

My “think week” didn’t exactly go to plan and initially I was frustrated. But, even when things don’t go according to plan, they can still be valuable. I’ll tell you about how I was able to change my mindset around my failed plan and the valuable lessons I learned from this years think week.


00:00 Here we are again! (Off to a nervous start)

00:21 When you prefer to be behind the scenes but you host a video podcast

01:11 taking 2 months off work every year had been a dream of mine

02:25 My version of Bill Gates' famous think week

03:17 Reducing my workload to 1-2 hours a day

04:18 When you get caught up in the busy-ness of everyday work

06:02 Things that don't go according to plan can still be valuable

08:51 From frustrated to focused

10:41 When excitement meets fear

11:58 Life is more than just your work


Go here:


➡️ To read my blog about my experiments with taking 2 months off work each year: https://www.thefrankermessage.com/blog/2-months-off


⭐ To follow the podcast: ⁠⁠Follow the podcast⁠⁠

⭐ To contact me: ⁠⁠contact@thefrankermessage.com⁠⁠

⭐ To visit my website: ⁠⁠thefrankermessage.com⁠

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1 year ago
13 minutes 30 seconds

The Exploring Introvert with Mariella Franker, PhD
080 | Last season's most popular: Low energy and the introvert hangover | Season 4

After a 2 months break, we are kicking off season 4!

This podcast chapter takes a look back. I'm sharing clips from the two most popular chapters from last season.

These chapters are all about energy and energy management for introverts.

From a personal perspective, struggles with an energy rollercoaster for a long time led me to believe that I was just "sickly" and "couldn't handle" as much as other people could.

I kept telling myself (and others) that I was a low energy person and it became a barrier for me to go out and to do things I wanted to do.

I tell you more about low energy in the first clip.

Introvert hangover was one of the reasons for my energy rollercoaster, although I didn't know that at the time.

Introvert hangover (or getting peopled out, overstimulation, social drain) is when introverts become extremely tired or even ill after a really busy time or from too much social interaction.

I tell you more about some of the science behind the introvert hangover in the second clip.

If you found this podcast helpful, please share it with a friend!


Go here for:


The full podcast chapters

➡️ ⁠Are you a low energy person?⁠

➡️ ⁠Everything you need to know about introvert hangover⁠


Other resources mentioned in this podcast chapter

➡️ ⁠12 signs you have an introvert hangover on Introvert, Dear⁠

➡️ ⁠Is dopamine really "the happy hormone"?⁠


⭐ To follow the podcast: ⁠Follow the podcast⁠

⭐ To contact me: ⁠contact@thefrankermessage.com⁠

⭐ To visit my website: ⁠thefrankermessage.com⁠

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1 year ago
14 minutes 25 seconds

The Exploring Introvert with Mariella Franker, PhD
079 | Life update: adapting to changes, creating a business that's sustainable and taking 2 months off | Season 3

This podcast episode is a bit different from the usual chapters. I’m doing a life update today. I’m going to share with you what’s been going on in my business, offers that I’m working on, and what’s coming up for the podcast.This is the final chapter of Season 3 as I'm taking a 2-month break over the Summer. I'll be back mid September with the first chapter of Season 4!Thank you all so much for sticking around through these many changes. I know I have a long way to go to make this podcast something really interesting. I hope that you'll stick around for what's coming next. 00:00 A special life update episode 00:53 Why did I slow down the podcast? 01:52 Creating a business that's sustainable 03:14 Managing my own inner critic around not being consistent 03:49 Accommodating life as a parent 04:34 What's up next for the podcast? 05:29 About Google podcast 06:00 Taking 2 months off work 07:23 Methods I’m using to develop a new offer 08:48 Next round of win-win feedback calls 09:30 About the mailing list: habit research, stories and tips, especially for introverts who work from home

—

▶️ Suggest a topic for a future episode: ⁠https://forms.gle/tNjvPHBJBF4JucCn6⁠

▶️ Sign up for the mailing list: an email every 2 weeks with habit research, stories and tips, especially for introverts who work from home: go.thefrankermessage.com/free ▶️ Blog and client stories: ⁠⁠https://www.thefrankermessage.com/blog⁠⁠

▶️ Follow me on LinkedIn: ⁠⁠https://www.linkedin.com/in/mariellafranker/⁠⁠

—

🎵 Andrés Rodríguez

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1 year ago
10 minutes 11 seconds

The Exploring Introvert with Mariella Franker, PhD
078 | Struggling with a chaotic daily routine? | Season 3

Today, we’re talking about another common habit bottleneck: the chaotic routine.

This is a familiar one. Probably everyone can recognize the feeling of having a really chaotic day. Your day is running away from you and you feel like you you’re a side character in a dramatic play that you didn’t audition for.

Usually, at the end of the day, you’re exhausted and even though you may have done a lot of things and you were running from one place to the next, you don’t feel like you accomplished anything.

But I want to encourage you because establishing a routine that works for you can be done and it’s less complicated than you think.

In this chapter, we’re doing to talk about why chaotic routine is a common habit bottleneck and what makes this hard for introverts in particular. We’re going to talk about 4 reasons why being disciplined to stick to the same routine every day isn’t the best strategy for everyone and we’re going to look at a few examples to help you create a routine that works well for you.

I identified ‘chaotic routine’ as one of the common habit bottlenecks because I get a lot of questions related to this. A LOT of people struggle with feeling chaotic throughout their day.

People will ask me things like:

I want to learn a new language or I want to pick up an old (or new) hobby but how do I possibly fit that into an already packed schedule?

or My life is so chaotic right now that I feel like I don’t have any time for myself

or From the moment I wake up to the moment I go to sleep, I’m just running. I hardly have time to catch my breath.

My clients work from full time or part time home and in the office and for them, feeling chaotic with their day is very common because they’re handling work, family, house chores, birthday parties and what not all within the same time windows.

It can be hard to come up with a routine that works for you and for allows you to do your work well and be there for your loved ones.

---

Related chapters: 044 | Introduction to habit styles: https://link.chtbl.com/whats-your-habit-style

---

▶️ Enter the 2024 giveaway! I’m looking for volunteers to give their feedback on 2 pages of text about my new coaching program. As a thank you, you’ll get a free 20-minute consultation worth 150,- Email ‘feedback’ to contact@thefrankermessage.com before June 23rd, 2024 at 23:00 CET to reserve a spot (calls will take place later this year).

---

▶️ Suggest a topic for a future episode: ⁠https://forms.gle/tNjvPHBJBF4JucCn6⁠

▶️ Get on the waitlist for the free gift bundle ‘Successfully planning your day for introverts: Discover a willpower-free way to learn healthy habits easily - no matter how busy or overwhelmed you are’: go.thefrankermessage.com/waitlist

▶️ Blog and client stories: ⁠⁠https://www.thefrankermessage.com/blog⁠⁠

▶️ Follow me on LinkedIn: ⁠⁠https://www.linkedin.com/in/mariellafranker/⁠⁠

—

🎵 Andrés Rodríguez

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1 year ago
20 minutes 55 seconds

The Exploring Introvert with Mariella Franker, PhD
077 | Falling into old patterns: removing this common habit bottleneck | Season 3

Maybe you’ve experienced this before: You were doing well with your healthy habits but now things just feel hard. You start skipping a day. Then another day. Then another day. You start to feel guilty. You start slipping back into old patterns and unhealthy habits you wanted to change. It’s probably not the first time this has happened either and you start wondering what’s wrong with you and why you’re just not disciplined enough. A lot of people struggle with this situation. In fact, in a survey that I sent out, across platforms 44% of people said that falling into old patterns is the #1 reason why they can’t seem to make their healthy habits stick. This is related to the habit bottleneck that we’re going to talk about today: the off-the-wagon misunderstanding. And I’m not talking about drinking alcohol, as this expression is often used. Everyone has run into this habit bottleneck in their lives. It’s when things feel really chaotic and it’s really hard to stay on top of things. The off-the-wagon-misunderstanding can happen when you’re trying to learn a new habit, when you’re circumstances have changed or when you’ve done something that’s really drained your energy and you’re trying to keep everything together. In this chapter of the podcast, we’re going to talk about how this habit bottleneck can get in the way of managing your personal energy and what introverts can do to remove the off-the-wagon bottleneck.


00:00 Falling into old patterns is a common habit bottleneck

01:55 Welcome to productive introvert community

02:29 Feeling like you've fallen off the wagon?

04:25 Shifting your focus

06:32 Figuring out your Peace Of Mind area

09:08 Recharging your energy is key for introverts —


▶️ Suggest a topic for a future episode: ⁠https://forms.gle/tNjvPHBJBF4JucCn6⁠


▶️ Get on the waitlist for the free gift bundle ‘Successfully planning your day for introverts: Discover a willpower-free way to learn healthy habits easily - no matter how busy or overwhelmed you are’: go.thefrankermessage.com/waitlist


▶️ Blog and client stories: ⁠⁠https://www.thefrankermessage.com/blog⁠⁠


▶️ Follow me on LinkedIn: ⁠⁠https://www.linkedin.com/in/mariellafranker/⁠⁠


—


🎵 Andrés Rodríguez

Show more...
1 year ago
9 minutes 56 seconds

The Exploring Introvert with Mariella Franker, PhD
076 | What's a habit? | Season 3

When I decided to coach introverts working from home specifically around healthy habits, I thought I had a good idea of what a habit is.

But as I started to talk about this with people, I realized that there are many different ways that people think about habits and that I really didn’t understand what habits are as well as I thought I did.

After working with 1-1 clients as a productivity coach for a few years, I realized that if we paid attention to a few key habits for my clients, it brought them much more joy and peace of mind, and that ended up achieve what they wanted more easily.

That’s when I knew that’s what I wanted to focus on for the foreseeable future.

But, as I started to explore, there were also a lot of questions about habits.

I’m going to make a series to explore all these questions in different chapters of this podcast. I’ll create a playlist on YouTube with all the habit related chapters as I go, so check that out if you want to know more about sustainable healthy habits for introverts who work from home.

For example: Is a habit really automatic? Are some people just not disciplined enough to form habits? Why do we get stuck in bad habits? Not to mention, how long does it take to form a habit and what’s the best way to learn a new habit?

Today, we’re going to start at the beginning: what is a habit? we’re going to talk about how habits can help you to conserve energy, especially if you’re an introverts. And why we get stuck in a bad habits.

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▶️ Suggest a topic for a future episode: https://forms.gle/tNjvPHBJBF4JucCn6

▶️ Join my mailing list for research and tips about healthy habits to improve energy and focus twice a month - especially for introverts who work from home: https://go.thefrankermessage.com/free

▶️ Blog and client stories: ⁠https://www.thefrankermessage.com/blog⁠

▶️ Follow me on LinkedIn: ⁠https://www.linkedin.com/in/mariellafranker/⁠

—

🎵 Andrés Rodríguez

Show more...
1 year ago
13 minutes 34 seconds

The Exploring Introvert with Mariella Franker, PhD
075 | Eating healthy and managing high blood sugar (3 personal lessons) | Season 3

Have you ever noticed that after a meal, you feel really tired and sleepy?

I used to think that this was just normal and that you feel sleepy after eating because your body was digesting food.

I also thought that feeling tired all the time was just what it was for me because I was an introvert and therefore I just had less energy than more extroverted people.

I couldn’t have been more wrong.

It turns out that high blood sugar was at least part of the reason why I felt tired all the time and why I had a lot of dips in my energy and my mood.

I’ve had issues with high blood sugar for some time.

When I was 24, my doctor told me that I was prediabetic and that it was only a matter of time before I got type 2 diabetes. At 27 weeks pregnant, I was diagnosed with pregnancy diabetes and needed to take insulin injections to protect my baby.

Thinking back, eating unhealthy food started in childhood for me and it wasn’t until my late 20s that this slowly started to change.

I’ve done quite a bit of research over the years about blood sugar, inflammatory disease like diabetes and healthy nutrition to try and get my blood sugar under control.

It’s a journey that I’ve been on for a while and one that I’m still very much still on.

Today, I’m going to share with you 3 things that I learned so far about blood sugar and eating healthy that helped me to have more energy, to have less mood swings and to have better concentration and focus.

At the end, I’ll give you two simple tips that you can use today to reduce spikes in blood sugar and improve your energy.

Topics:

- Why is blood sugar important?

- What is diabetes (difference between type 1 and type 2 diabetes)

- What does this have to do with energy dips, especially for introverts?

- 3 things that helped me to eat healthy and to have more energy & focus

1. Experiencing the positive effect of healthy nutrition

2. Changing my environment to change my habits

3. Starting small vs going all in: what works better for you?

+ 2 tips from Jessie, the Glucose Goddess, that you can start today to reduce spikes in your blood sugar

- Veggie starter

- Vinegar hack


▶️ Vote for your favorite topic and receive the new training for free: https://forms.gle/ByHcSXrNCGU3zfys7

▶️ Book a free call to learn if the No-Discipline Healthy Habit Roadmap for introverts is right for you: https://go.thefrankermessage.com/freecall


▶️ Join the mailing list for healthy habit research & tips in your inbox twice a month - especially for introverts who work from home: https://go.thefrankermessage.com/freegift


▶️ Visit the blog: https://www.thefrankermessage.com/blog


▶️ Follow me on LinkedIn: ⁠https://www.linkedin.com/in/mariellafranker/⁠⁠

—

Resources mentioned in this podcast (I’m not affiliated with any of the resources that I share on the podcast, I just share them out of personal interest and to give you context about these topics)

—

📖 Jessie Inchauspé - Glucose Goddess https://www.glucosegoddess.com/

—

🎵 Andrés Rodríguez

Show more...
1 year ago
15 minutes 50 seconds

The Exploring Introvert with Mariella Franker, PhD
074 | How to sleep better without sleeping more | Season 3

We all know that sleep is important. If you don’t get enough sleep, it impairs your mental ability, your ability to learn and remember things, it affects your mood and your body’s metabolism and immune system.

I got a request to talk about how to sleep better without sleeping more. So, let’s talk about that today!

I’ve had my share of sleep issues too. When I was in my teens and early 20s, I struggled with depression. Back then, sleep was an escape for me and I easily slept between 9 and 12 hours a day.

A few years later, the reverse happened: I started sleeping only 3-4 hours a day due to stress and that was one of the reasons I burned out when I was 27. My ability to focus and my energy levels plummeted and it took me years to build them back up.

When I had my first child, sleep became a whole new chapter and it was a challenge to get enough sleep with interrupted nights and nightly feedings.

I’ve tried a lot of sleep tips to try to get my sleep back under control and to sleep better.

A lot of introverts think that if they could only sleep more, they would stop feeling so tired all the time, but sleeping more is only one piece of the puzzle. If you want to get better sleep, there are a few other things to think about.

Today I’ll share 5 things that I’ve learned about sleep that have helped me to sleep better and to feel more energized during the day without actually sleeping more hours.


Why is sleep important?

Why a lot of introverts struggle with sleep

Number 1: Simply focusing less on sleeping more

Number 2: Training myself to fall asleep quickly

Number 3: Keeping a regular sleep schedule

Number 4: Paying attention to what I do during the day

Number 5: Intermittent fasting

— Related episodes:

Everything you need to know about introvert hangover: https://link.chtbl.com/068-introvert-hangover

— Resources:

📖 Want to Fall Asleep Faster? Military Pilots Use This Hack to Sleep Anywhere in 2 Minutes or Less by Melanie Curtin on Inc.com: https://www.inc.com/melanie-curtin/want-to-fall-asleep-faster-combat-pilots-use-this-hack-to-get-to-sleep-in-2-minutes-or-less.html

—

▶️ Book a free exploration call to discover a will-power free way to have more energy and focus, no matter how busy or overwhelmed you are: https://thefrankermessage.com/freecall


▶️ Join Productive Introvert Letters for weekly insights from a certified habit coach for introverted solopreneurs: ⁠go.thefrankermessage.com/subscribe⁠


▶️ Blog and client stories: ⁠https://www.thefrankermessage.com/blog⁠


▶️ Follow me on LinkedIn: ⁠https://www.linkedin.com/in/mariellafranker/⁠


—

🎵 Andrés Rodríguez

Show more...
1 year ago
14 minutes 44 seconds

The Exploring Introvert with Mariella Franker, PhD
073 | The Placebo Effect: why perception and mindset matters | Season 3

There are a lot of studies that show that the placebo effect is real. “Fake” treatments can actually make you feel better. Interestingly, they can also make you feel worse. The nocebo effect is also real. Is this all just perception? Is it the power of the mind? Or is there something else going on? ▶️ Join Productive Introvert Letters for weekly insights from a certified habit coach for introverted solopreneurs: ⁠go.thefrankermessage.com/subscribe⁠

▶️ Blog and client stories: ⁠https://www.thefrankermessage.com/blog⁠

▶️ Follow me on LinkedIn: ⁠https://www.linkedin.com/in/mariellafranker/⁠

— Resources mentioned in this podcast (I’m not affiliated with any of the resources that I share on the podcast, I just share them out of personal interest and to give you context about these topics) 📖 https://dash.harvard.edu/bitstream/handle/1/3196007/Langer_ExcersisePlaceboEffect.pdf 📖 https://www.sydney.edu.au/news-opinion/news/2019/11/20/you-know-medicines-placebo-effect-now-meet-the-nocebo-effect.html 📖 https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC9399436/ 📖 https://www.cambridge.org/core/journals/advances-in-psychiatric-treatment/article/rethinking-placebo-in-psychiatry-the-range-of-placebo-effects/48E57FE6798A75E5C019B0CAC3213B38 📖 https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6176716/ 📖 https://www.cambridge.org/core/journals/advances-in-psychiatric-treatment/article/rethinking-placebo-in-psychiatry-the-range-of-placebo-effects/48E57FE6798A75E5C019B0CAC3213B38 📖 https://jamanetwork.com/journals/jamapsychiatry/article-abstract/210854 —

🎵 Andrés Rodríguez


Show more...
1 year ago
7 minutes 15 seconds

The Exploring Introvert with Mariella Franker, PhD
072 | My best ways to plan my time and feel energized as an introvert (and tips to find your own way) | Season 3

In today’s chapter, we’re talking about time blocking. We’re diving into how to make a plan for your day to help you stay focused and energized, especially if you’re an introvert.

If you're interested in time management, or if you're struggling with procrastination, you might find time blocking helpful. Time blocking is like making a plan for your day. You plan your day by setting aside certain times to do certain things. Like saying: “I’m going on a call from 2pm - 3 pm, then I’m going to read a book from 3 pm -4 pm.

But there’s more than one way to do it.

I've tried time blocking many times over the years, and it was tough to find a method that worked for me. One that helped me make the most of my time and energy. As an introvert who runs a business from home and has a family, managing my energy is really important.

But time blocking can be hard to do.

Some of the introverts in Productive Introvert Community that I’ve spoken with say that they start using methods like time blocking and feel good at first because they're getting things done. But after a few days or weeks, they find it hard to stick to their plan. It takes up a lot of energy. They feel tired all the time and they start procrastinating on important things. Then they think time blocking doesn't work and they stop using it.

Often, the problem is that they're being too strict with how they plan their day.

They make a plan for the day and force themselves to stick to it no matter what. Or they try one way of time blocking and if it doesn't work, they give up planning their day all together.

Today, I’m going to tell you about 3 ways to time block to help you feel more focused and energized, especially if you’re an introvert.

The 3 time blocking methods are: activity time blocking, energy time blocking, and theme days.

I use these methods myself and they work great for me. But remember, what works for me might not work for me. That’s okay!

I'll also give you tips that can help you to plan your day in a way that works for you.

— ▶️ Book a FREE call to explore if one of my coaching programs for introverts is a fit for you. I'll help you identify the habit bottleneck that's getting in your way right now and show you the best next step for you so that you get focused in the next 3 months: go.thefrankermessage.com/freecall

▶️ Join Productive Introvert Letters for a summary of new podcast episodes right to your inbox twice a month: https://www.thefrankermessage.com/

▶️ Blog and client stories: ⁠https://www.thefrankermessage.com/blog⁠

▶️ Follow me on LinkedIn: ⁠https://www.linkedin.com/in/mariellafranker/

—

Resources mentioned in this podcast (I’m not affiliated with any of the resources that I share on the podcast, I just share them out of personal interest and to give you context about these topics)

—

📖 Time blocking 101 by Jo Johansson (covers basic time blocking, day theming, task batching, time boxing, Elon Musk’s 5 minute time blocking, Eisenhower matrix & Pomodoro technique: https://resourceguruapp.com/blog/time-blocking

📖 Time blocking by Laura Scroggs (covers task batching, day theming & time boxing): https://todoist.com/productivity-methods/time-blocking#what-is-time-blocking

📖 How to boost your productivity with time blocking by Rachel Hakoune (covers traditional time blocking, pomodoro technique, time theming, energy management time blocking & batch time blocking): https://monday.com/blog/productivity/increase-your-productivity-with-time-blocking-a-step-by-step-guide/

📖 Elon Musk’s 5-minute rule: Block your time like Tesla’s CEO by Timeular: https://timeular.com/blog/block-your-time-like-elon-musk/

📖 Why theming my das has made me a better dad by Mike Vardy: https://productivityist.com/theming-days-made-better-dad/

—

🎵 Andrés Rodríguez

Show more...
1 year ago
13 minutes 5 seconds

The Exploring Introvert with Mariella Franker, PhD
071 | Is dopamine really "the happy hormone"? (how dopamine influences reward, discipline, motivation and happiness) | Season 3

This week we’re talking about dopamine.

I feel that there's a bit of confusion about this topic. Maybe you’re wondering what does dopamine do? How does dopamine make you happy? How can I increase my dopamine? And is too much dopamine bad for you?

It's really normal to be confused about this topic.

If you search online about dopamine and how it influences us, you might find things describing how dopamine makes you happy, how to hack dopamine to be more disciplined and motivated and how you can boost dopamine to be happier.

But you may also find resources saying that we’re addicted to dopamine, that instant gratification is ruining our lives and that you should go on a dopamine detox or a dopamine fast and delay gratification.

So, yeah… If you’re confused about this topic, you’re not alone…

I want to demystify this a little bit for you today to help you better understand how the brain works and how you can stop fighting and instead start working with your natural processes more.

Calling dopamine the happy hormone is a bit misleading and I’m going to tell you why.

There are two sides to this:

  1. what is dopamine and what does it have to do with happiness? and
  2. what do we humans actually need to be happy?

— Resources mentioned in this podcast (I’m not affiliated with any of the resources that I share on the podcast, I just share them out of personal interest and to give you context about these topics)

📖 All in the mind podcast: Pleasure, pain, dopamine and the brain with dr. Anna Lembke: https://www.abc.net.au/listen/programs/allinthemind/pleasure-pain-dopamine-and-the-brain/14043764


📖 Everything you need to know about introvert hangover (what is it, the science, and how to recover): https://link.chtbl.com/068-introvert-hangover


📖 Veritasium: What the longest-running study on happiness reveals: https://youtu.be/vSQjk9jKarg


—

Learn more from me about healthy habits for introverts

—

▶️ Book a FREE call to reveal Your Habit Style and walk away with a 1-page pdf about your personal habit building process: ⁠https://calendly.com/thefrankermessage/reveal-my-habit-style⁠


▶️ Join Productive Introvert Letters for weekly insights from a certified habit coach for introverted solopreneurs: ⁠go.thefrankermessage.com/subscribe⁠


▶️ Blog and client stories: ⁠https://www.thefrankermessage.com/blog⁠


▶️ Follow me on LinkedIn: ⁠https://www.linkedin.com/in/mariellafranker/⁠


—

🎵 Andrés Rodríguez

Show more...
1 year ago
21 minutes 12 seconds

The Exploring Introvert with Mariella Franker, PhD
You’re in the right place if you’re an introvert who wants to use your strengths to make meaningful contributions to others and take better care of yourself. I'm Mariella: a molecular biologist, certified habit coach, business owner, parent, and introvert :-) Every first Thursday of the month, I share an update with my most eye-opening lessons. You’ll learn about important topics for introverts - like reducing tiredness, discovering what naturally motivates you, and strengthening relationships in a way that feels natural - from my experience and from other exploring introverts like you.